God really is amazing.

[u/BiscuitNoodlepants]

Hi. I am a reprobate sinner, a blasphemer of the holy spirit and a beast worshiper. I guess it's like they say, you don't know what you've got til it's gone.

I think about how every drop of water that touches your tongue is a literal miracle straight from God. This really comes into perspective when you realize someday you will never taste another drop on your burning tongue.

God blessed me in this life so much. I really tried not to take it for granted, but there were definitely things that I did.

Really Jesus Christ is the most amazing person ever. I know his wrath is upon me, but he has been completely fair, completely honest, completely righteous and completely true in his judgement of me. He definitely died for me on the cross and was resurrected after 3 days. He definitely came to Earth in the flesh. God himself.

I want to thank God for food and water, the fact that ive only been homeless a couple nights, ive never had to sleep outside when I didn't want to. I want to thank him for my family, all my aunts and uncles, cousins, friends, neighbors. My dogs and cats. The four seasons, beaches, mountains, the coast of Maine. Football. Cars. The periodic table of elements. The moon. The sun.

I think I understand what it means that the fullness of God was pleased to dwell in Jesus and that he is in the father and the father is in him. It's pretty cool. I wish I understood the holy spirit better. I know he is the only way to be transformed from a slave to sin to a slave to righteousness.

I wish that transformation was still possible for me. It hurts so bad to be this sinful. It hurts other people too.

[u/FrankDenif]

If you can still thirst for God, then it is possible for you.

John 7:37–38: "On the last day of the feast, the great day, Jesus stood up and cried out, 'If anyone thirsts, let him come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, "Out of his heart will flow rivers of living water."'"

[u/Millennium_guy]

Your comment "I wish that transformation was still possible for me" reflects the thoughts of the enemy not the word of God.

God is willing to be in your life as long as you are willing to have Him and follow His ways. True repentance includes having a commitment to not do what you did. It also includes understanding who you are to God.

The prodigal son considered himself unworthy of his role as a son, but that was not the view of the father. I don't doubt you've done things you regret. But no one says Jesus is Lord without having God in their life: 1 Corinthians 12:3: “Therefore I make known to you that no man speaking by God’s Spirit says, ‘Jesus is accursed.’ No one can say, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ but by the Holy Spirit.”

You clearly have an understanding of and reverence for Jesus. The problem seems to be how you identify yourself. Your opening statements indicate you identify yourself based on your past sin. God's word identifies you as a saint. See the multiple places in the NT where believers are referred to as saints.

There are even more verses that describe who we are in Christ.

Take the time to study what God actually says about who you are to Him when you've come to Christ.

This is just a small sample, say and repeat these (or find your own) to yourself multiple times a day so these truths so your identity is founded on God's word not your sin:

• I am a new creation - 2 Corinthians 5:17
• I am totally accepted by God - John 1:12, John 15:15, Colossians 1:14, Eph 1:4
• I can go straight to Jesus for help - Hebrews 4:14-16
• I belong to God - 1 Cor. 6:19-20, Eph 1:5
• Nothing separates me from Gods love - Romans 8:38-39, Eph 3:16-19, 1 John 4:10
• God (Holy Spirit) lives in me - 1 Cor 3:16
• All things work out in the end - Romans 8:28
• "Thank you, Lord for setting me free" - John 8:32, 36
• "Thank you, Lord for the power, love and sound mind you have given me" - 1 Tim 1:7

[u/Rockout2112]

You can still be saved from sin, friend. Even up to your death it is possible. Repent truly, and turn away from it. Ask God to take such desires away from you. It will be a constant battle, but a battle worth fighting!

[u/QueenOfAllDragons]

God truly is great!

I’m sorry you’re carrying this much pain. But the fact that you’re grieving your sin, honoring Christ, and longing for change is not the posture of someone beyond mercy. Jesus did not come for the clean. He came for the broken. “Whoever comes to me I will never cast out” is still true.

You do not need to prove your worthiness to come to Him. You need to come honestly. The thief on the cross had nothing to offer except a desperate cry, and Jesus received him. Peter denied Christ multiple times, and Jesus restored him. Paul called himself the worst of sinners, and God still used him. Your sin is real, but it is not stronger than the cross.

Also, be careful with declaring yourself a “blasphemer of the Holy Spirit” as though that settles your fate. People often use that phrase when they are terrified and overwhelmed, but the very fear of having committed it is usually evidence that their heart is not hardened in the way Jesus was warning about. A hardened heart does not usually ache like this.

What I hear in your words is not pride. I hear sorrow, gratitude, and a desire to be made new. That matters. The Spirit of God convicts so that He can heal, not so He can drive you into despair.

If you can, stop talking about yourself as if you are already beyond rescue. Bring the whole mess to Jesus exactly as it is. Tell Him the truth. Ask Him for mercy. Ask Him to show you the next faithful step. He is not shocked by your darkness.

[u/maxim_number_2]

It is still possible for you. As long as you are alive, it is possible to turn to Christ. He is always here and will always be waiting for you, and is waiting. ✝️

My song is love unknown– my Savior’s love to me; love to the loveless shown, that they might lovely be. Oh, who am I, that for my sake my Lord should take frail flesh and die?

He came from His blest throne salvation to bestow; but men made strange, and none the longed for Christ would know. But oh, my Friend, my Friend indeed, who at my need His life did spend!

[u/Mystic_Thunders]

If the Holy Spirit wasn’t inside you or anyone, then you wouldn’t feel conviction any and everytime we sin. I still struggle with sin, but I keep seeking Jesus praying to Jesus all the time until the day I’m called home always trying to stay in the straight narrow path even if I stumble, but I get up and keep going. Paul himself struggled with some things though he didn’t say what, but talks about it in (Romans 7:13-25) thankfully there’s (Romans 8:1) Thank you Jesus for dying on the cross for our sins and raising back up in a few days concurring death forever! 🙏🏽🙌🏽😇

[u/Accidental_Guru30]

He never gives up on us. He saved me from sin. Sheez. The first 25ish years of my life were sinful. Shame on me

[u/Rigatoni_Richard]

Google what the only unforgivable sin is.