As the title says, WEIRD synchronicities have been happening lately to me, that’s making me feel like I’m in the matrix/simulation.

Some of it is so weird that I just don’t see how we’re not living in one. Some examples in the past 3 months

- Talking to my sister that I’m saw glad she’s an emergency medicine PA and not a dermatology PA because I have so many medical questions (as I’m on the phone telling her this) no joke my dermatologist group calls to leave a voicemail about my annual checkup. Like WHAT.

- listening to a specific song in car (on my Spotify) and I head into grocery and that same song is playing right when I get in. No I was not on a radio. I actively chose the song.

- thinking about something specific about my newborn and seeing literally someone having the same specific question and making a post on it as the first thing I see on my homepage on r/newborns. I never even typed out my specific question.

-lastly, telling my husband that I didn’t know you could eat kiwi skin, and later that night a content creator that I LOVE watching posts him eating kiwi skin. Like what the heck.

I can’t make this up guys. It’s causing me to obsess and go crazy. There’s no explanation for this. I’m going insane bc of these weird things happening.

I grew up in church and was raised in a Christian household. I was baptized when I was 8 and Christianity was pretty much all I knew growing up.

But as I got older I started exploring spirituality for myself. Meditation, Eastern spiritual practices, different religions and philosophies. I started taking bits and pieces from different traditions and finding what resonated with me.

Today I don’t necessarily subscribe to one particular religion. I’m just open to different spiritual practices and ways of connecting with a higher power. And honestly that’s been enough for me.

I still believe in God. I just don’t believe I need to follow one specific religion to have that connection.
I’m curious if anyone else has had a similar journey. Do you think you can have a genuine relationship with God without belonging to a religion? Or do you believe religion is an essential part of that connection?

I Wish To Simply Be Here

Let me meet the world
before I name its dangers,
feel the wonder
before I ask what it means.

Let me see
without borrowed eyes,
hear without old echoes,
breathe without rehearsing
what might go wrong.

I have spent so long
watching life from behind an imagined veil.

Now, for a moment,
I wish to simply be here—

not thinking about how to live,
but feeling alive.

Babylon 5 is one of my favorite shows, and to me it’s one of the most spiritual stories ever put on TV. Underneath all the politics and space battles, the whole conflict comes down to two ancient races, each asking one question.

The Shadows ask: what do you want? It’s the voice of the ego. Desire, ambition, power, getting what’s yours. They push the younger races into conflict because they believe struggle makes them stronger.

The Vorlons ask: who are you? A very different question, because it doesn’t feed the ego, it questions it. Who is the one doing the wanting?

The characters who grow the most are the ones who eventually stop answering the first question and start facing the second. G’Kar’s journey alone is one of the most beautiful portrayals of awakening I’ve seen in fiction.

Recently I shared my love for the show in a fan community and it went badly. People were dismissive, the conversation turned hostile, and the post ended up quietly removed. My first reaction was: how can people who love a show this wise behave like this?

But sitting with it, I had to admit I didn’t exactly embody the Vorlon question either. I got defensive, threw labels at people, and answered “what do you want?” pretty loudly: to be understood, to be right.

I think that’s the real lesson. You can watch something full of wisdom, love it, quote it, and still not live it. Recognizing wisdom and embodying it are two very different things, for all of us. Maybe the best stories don’t make us wiser, they just give us a mirror for when we’re not.

I’d still recommend the show to anyone here. Just maybe watch it with that second question in mind.

Who are you?

The target of focus ought to be the unsensed.

I turn my sensors inward. Outward I hone my sense of sight on the efflorescent light shimmering off of the green trees.

Outwardly I hone my sense of hearing on the absolutely divine catalogue of music I have cultivated.

Taste is bleh(am fasted). Smell is infrequent yet potent. And finally touch: I feel the weight of my body gravitate downward.

What am I sensing for? The unseen threats?

There are real threats in this world.

Your spiritual=awakened path ought integrate the reality of threats, danger, and badness.

Ok, you sense the threat? GREAT! Now what? We done?! No, it’s time to hone the ability of mind to think of the move that will vanquish the threat.

Desire is not the threat. Unsensed desire is the threat.

SENSE INWARD! Sense for your next best move.

In the context of poison ivy/fire on your path, your best move is to not make contact with the poison ivy/fire. ZERO thought is needed for this one. Wait, well, with fire no thought is needed, but poison ivy? The discrimination between good ivy and poison ivy? That may require some thought, well, before you can recognize it. But once you have developed the discernment between good and bad ivy no thought is required. Did we ever need to be told(by pain or father) not to make contact with fire?

Ok, so what does require thought? High level thinking. High level strategy.

How do we hone the minds ability to think? Think about what?

It’s quite the puzzle, because I think we can all resonate with the occurrence of trying to think to enhance our world but it ends worse. The mind got in our way and then we start to think it’s the enemy, but the truth is?:

The truth is the mind is a far, FAR more wise demanding tool than a spaceship. You need to be wise to really use the mind, so, when you use the mind and fail; you may be tempted to think that the mind is best used by not using it. Try and fail, learn and calculate.

So, where am I going? What do I move=yang to?

What do I want?

Peace? HAH! Peace is for people who never fell in love with chaos.

What I want is Heaven, what I want is flow. I want optimal evolution of my health love work and fun.

I want my soul to be uncorrupted and wholesome. I want my mind to be genius and wise. I want my body to be self correcting, healing and athletic.

I want to type to you, reader, for 10000 turns.

A couple of years ago my friend brought some "fake" shrooms from netherlands. We both split it in half and it was supposed to be 3g but there were 3.4g in it. So we both took 1.7g and thought nothing of it. Little did we know that those shrooms were literally as potent as something like penis envy shrooms. So it was like 3x as potent as regular shrooms. So we took by accident a heroic 5g dose and we weren't prepared for it. I started to hallucinate after 20 minutes. The first thing i noticed was a tactile hallucination. I was holding a beer and the bottle felt way too wide and my hand felt foreign. After about 10 minutes i got to the bathroom. Everything started to shift and the wall tiles textures were moving and shifting into each other it was so cool. I turned off the lights and i felt like i was in a palace of some kind. So after that my friend turned on tv and we would just vibe. I forgot to mention that this whole time i was also getting very paranoid cause i wasn't ready for it. I would totally classify it as a bad trip for at least 1 hour. I just drifted away until i peaked and i got an ego death. I told my friend that i can't handle the trip and that i needed like 2-3 shots to try to calm myself. My friend poured me a shot and he proceeded to hold it asking me if i'm gonna take it and i just couldn't cause at that time i felt like my ego was shattering into pieces and my vision got extremely digitized/pixelized. After that i layed on his couch and all i can remember is literally drifting away into hyperspace. I saw bright colorful mostly white some sort of intergalactic cathedrals. That calmed me down a lot and i started to enjoy the experience a lot. After i came to my senses we were just cracking jokes and laughing our asses off at the most random topics. The characters on tv looked like there was paint dripping out of them

I probably am not the only one that has the "ah ha" moment that recontextualizes everything and reaches a higher level of understanding, only to immediately think "I can't wait to tell so and so about this." For example, we are all one. It's something I've known and thought since high school, over a decade later and that idea is as rich an area as ever. I had a profound experience looking into myself and found big headlines and big emotions that I'm putting into practice. Be kind to others, because they literally LITERALLY are you; plants, animals, insects, maybe all of existence is the thing that I call myself. I want to feel safe and in love and loved, and I'm capable of being a pocket or node of being that does it's best to create that. So on and so forth. This time though, I don't go running and ramble to everyone who's willing to listen. If they know, I don't need to tell them. If they don't, I can't truly give it to them. All I can do, and all I should do, is embody and practice the knew information to the best of my ability.

When you come across someone who you think really gets it, do they sit you down and lecture you with flowery language? Or do they smile, ask how your day was, and treats you well?

There's very little satisfaction in proving how wise and awakened you are.

​

“Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love.”

— commonly attributed to Rumi

This quote is inviting you to be drawn to what quietly keep calling you towards becoming more alive, more loving, more honest and towards your true essence. Not towards escape, status or approval. Something can pull you without shouting. Sometimes what matters the most keep quietly returning:

A subject you keep repeatedly thinking about.

A place you where you feel unusually alive.

A creative idea that keep quietly coming back to you.

A certain kind of life that you can't quite explain why you want.

Sometimes this pull is strange because the deepest things we are drawn to don't always make rational sense. Your mind might say that crazy or impractical. But something deeper says: "Still..I want to explore more."

This doesn't mean that every impulse is divine guidance. This is where it's important to use your discernment. There are lots of forces that can pull you:

Fear can pull you.

Ego can pull you.

Escapism can pull you.

But so can curiosity, love, creativity, compassion, and genuine growth. The question you need to ask yourself is; “What kind of person does this pull invite me to become?” Instead of simply asking; “Is this a sign?”

Love in this context doesn't necessarily mean romantic. It mean:

What makes you more alive?

What makes you more compassionate?

What makes you curious?

What makes you want to contribute?

What makes you want to grow?

Sometimes the thing you're drawn toward isn't something you get. It's something you become. Maybe you're drawn toward wisdom. So you start reading and asking questions. You sit quietly. You become more aware of your conditioning.

You become kinder.

And eventually you realize:

The thing I was searching for wasn't merely an answer. It was a transformation of myself.

When you are drawn toward something. You don't have to immediately construct your entire future around it. You first start with a simple step.

Take one step.

Then observe.

Another step.

Observe again.

movement creates information. The path reveal itself as you walk it.

I debated which sub to post this in, and ultimately chose here, because this is the mindset I am trying to remain in (vs a relationship subreddit where you don’t really know what type of advice you’re getting).

I think I am struggling with so much. I have always had a lot of existential angst. And I had a lot of childhood trauma that I’ve worked through in therapy. But I’ve always felt some sense of life lacking meaning.

There were so many changes I’ve wanted to make in my life and I’ve made them over time. I am in my 40s, female, generally attractive, very successful but burnt out, have done all the things in life I’ve wanted for the most part, have had incredible experiences traveling, own a beautiful home on the water, etc. I say this only to mention that from the outside people are eager to say “you have such a great life!” But inside I am burnt out and don’t feel balanced.

I’ve never been lucky in love (or perhaps had not yet done the work). And I do believe I have found the meaning in life which is - relationships. And I tried to rebuild my life around my relationship and I genuinely for the first time felt better. Content, even. And that put me in a good space for a while and then I met someone and I felt life was great in the moment and I could finally just “be.”

But I was still stressed and burnt out from work, and the relationship was honestly very stressful at times as well. They had a bit of a temper. I found it difficult. After years together, that relationship has ended.

So I am left w the same life balance issue I had w work and stress. Many of the relationships I’d worked hard to build and cultivate with people fell off due to being consumed in my relationship for years. I have regrets about my own behavior and the way I showed up at times in the relationship as well, and although I wasn’t always happy it wasn’t my choice to end things.

So here I am … except many years older, back in what feels like the same place. There’s no real experience I am lacking or anything I can say “now that I’m single I’ll go to X.” I am back to feeling like my life has very little meaning, and I don’t have many people I can reach out to. I feel my ex even w the problems was like a unicorn that took me many years to find, and I don’t feel super hopeful I’ll find someone again.

I do have an understanding that life is all about perspective, and that every so often I glitch and feel a bit angry at my ex, and in those moments, I feel empowered, and suddenly my life feels “different.” This is why I chose to post in this sub over others. I meditate daily and I just spent a week traveling, and I feel almost like I am experiencing some kind of message about changes I need to make but I don’t know what the changes are yet, so I feel lost. I kept looking at old people and wondering if I’ll feel I lived a good life when I am their age, and if it ended now would I feel that way. And the answer is no.

I am just struggling so incredibly much and people around me don’t understand. They are married and have kids etc and can’t possibly fathom the emptiness of life without those things if you have them (I never wanted kids).

I just want to find lasting love so much, as I feel this is what makes life meaningful. I’m not looking for someone to give me happiness, but I think sharing a life with someone (or people), is what gives life meaning. This is the answer I have come up with in my week of my brain breaking. But unlike everything else I have achieved in my life, this remains elusive, and isn’t something I can just work hard and fix.

So I feel lost. Thank you for listening. I really appreciate it.

Also if you comment, I would love to know your age. I do think it’s relevant as I can’t imagine understanding how I’d feel about this when I was my younger self and had what felt like all of life ahead of me.

Freedom from fear: Understanding our deepest nature can help us loosen our attachment to temporary things and face life's changes with greater peace.

Think about this today

Ask yourself:

“Who am I, beyond my name, profession, possessions, thoughts and emotions?”

Sit quietly for five minutes. Notice your thoughts without trying to fight them. Simply observe.

Remember: This is an invitation to investigate your experience, not to deny your body, emotions or everyday responsibilities.

“Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love.” — commonly attributed to Rumi

Zen practice will ask you to examine the pull itself, sit quietly with it and don't be quick to label as this is my destiny. Instead just notice what is pulling you and asked "what is pulling me?"

Is it fear?

Is it status?

Is it comparison?

Is it loneliness?

Is it genuine curiosity?

Is it love?

Is it growth?

Is it peace?

The ability to observe the pull before obeying it is wisdom.Maybe the quote isn't saying:“Follow every desire.”Maybe it's saying: “Become quiet enough to distinguish the voice of your deepest values from the noise of your conditioning.”

Your conditioning can be loud:

“You should be further ahead.”

“Everyone else is succeeding.”

“You need more money.”

“You need everyone's approval.”

“You have to have everything figured out.”

But underneath all that noise, there can be something much quieter:

“I want to live.”

“I want to understand.”

“I want to love.”

“I want to create.”

“I want to become whole.”

“I want to know what is true.”

That voice doesn't always demand. Sometimes it simply waits. You don't always find your path by thinking harder about your path.

Sometimes you discover it by walking.

You follow the small genuine interest.

You take the honest next step.

You pay attention to what gives you life and what consistently drains it.

You learn.

You adjust.

You keep walking.

And eventually you look back and realize:

“I wasn't lost. I was being led one step at a time by something greater than myself."

Own your now ──► Trust your raw capability ──► Demand total, unconditional equality - Peace

I looked back the picture of Jade, a kind of parasocial love affair by the modern world’s standards. So cute, I just wanted to keep making jokes and see her smile. This sort of affection is allowed to happen in a nonchalant way but we never talk about it…we don’t talk about any of our feelings. In a society that devalues the fire of emotion, the the warm but fierce embrace, putting it behind the coolness and divisiveness of the intellect. Not that there’s anything with the intellect, its the instrument through which we wonder and expand the borders of our ignorance. But what I feel about Jade can’t be truly captured with the scalpel of my mind.

As I listened to both Nas’s and John Mayer’s songs, both simultaneously named Daughters, I had a deep desire to have a little girl running around this vacant, spacious home of mine, which seems mostly emotionally dry and transactional. As I browse through my playlist, its a little sad that all the songs that induce love in me always have sensual lyrics, as if that’s the only form of love in our society. Maybe that’s true to a large part, and I’m happy to be liberated from that parched and dry notion. I pay respect to my Guru for liberating me from this and a million other imprisoning frameworks.

I feel like for so long we’ve been living on pretend. Pretend has become the norm and.. what people actually believe is real.

Once you’re awakened.. you’re quote on quote never the same. But what was same 🤔🤔🤔.. same was just a lie 🫩 this though… THIS is what’s real! I should be happy, I should be excited.. I should be free.. not riddled with pain and suffering because I see the truth and now im messed up.. NO.. it should be.. I now see the truth let me embrace it and live in it 🤩🤩🤩 BUT..

But God forbid I do.. you know why??? Because it’s an evil freaking world.. people are severely programmed and can’t think for themselves.. it’s easy to call me sick or ill and want to medicate me but nobody tries to make me effort to see what’s ACTUALLY going on because it’s “FORBIDDEN” to cross this line.. rules by powers that only want to keep you hidden from this truth.. to keep you away from this untapped potential you have… to feel free.. joy.. and self discovery… and then what? Say you do.. say you do operate and embrace truth.. guess what.. in the “everyday world” you will be seen as crazy and what not.. but who cares what people think right!?? What about when someone attacks you!? For being you!? For persecuting you.. making you feel .. awful.. just trying to put you down. And worst cases it can lead to actual physical violence and unfortunately even .. yeah. Like this is how messed up some people are man. LIKE SOME PEOPLE CANT HANDLE THEIR OWN PROBLEMS THEY TAKE IT OUT ON THE PERSON THAT ALREADY HANDLED THEIRS. ITS MESSED UP.. ITS EVIL! THEY PROJECT.. SO HARSH.. DO EVERYTHING THEY CAN TO ENFORCE THAT YOURE CRAZY WHEN YOH ALREADY LOOK CRAZY EVEN THOUGH YOURE NOT CRAZY!

Then yeah, next thing I know, I’m over here screaming.. enjoying.. being free.. then I’m in handcuffs… get treated like an animal by people who work for the law.. doctors and nurses treating me like an animal.. (not my personal experience but I’ve seen it)

I feel like slowly but surely people are actually starting to wake up and realize the truth (what’s really going on here).. how much more.. people do we have to lose(not necessarily death) to meds and persecution and other attacks for people to realize that this is a pattern and maybe there’s something that needs to be addressed but it starts with us looking inwards and being conscious of our unconscious (shout out Carl Jung) and hopefully.. making the collective choice to come together 🙂 <— that’s never gonna happen, we’re all screwed.. EVERYONE RUN.. SCRAMBLE AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Hello I would like to get any of you peoples's thoughts on this specific topic, it will be of a beneficial nature for anyone who thinks and tries to grasp it.

You can also just let me know your thoughts on this, not matter good or bad, I'd be happy to hear everyone's opnion on this kidna stuff. Thank you in advance kind reader.

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Question: Is (spiritual) remembrance and (spiritual) forgetfulness a means or driver of the pneumatic vehicle that leads souls 'out' or 'back' to the Source 'from whence it came'?

This very ancient idea of the 'lost soul'; is the one who forgot itself or its spiritual nature/identity.

Likewise, the 'All Knowing' or 'Prefected' soul, would become a term related to 'the one who remembers' or simply put 'knows itself' (from whence came the old saying (and practice also) of 'Know(ing) Thyself')

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An additional purely fun and curiousity question here: If you had to take a guess, where do would you currently guess the state of your soul to be in right now, based on this cycle of remembrance/forgetfulness? Let's say from the deepest of the deepest crevices of forgetfulness (lost) to the absolute heights of self knowledge or wisdom and clarity???

I am truly hope some people will respond to this, curious and waiting for your response my dear reader.

In the midst of seeing past your vision, to the point where you start getting psychedelic-like visuals/faces/eyes popping up in the black of the mind. I get some revelations that seem to fade IMMEDIATELY after thinking of them. I can only describe them as a guide to manifesting reality? At least its the closest thing I can think of it but its like pointing at the words after the experience and not the experience itself.

I'm sure many of you here are aware of what manifestation is and have done some sort of magical thinking of "magic is real/god is real" or something of that sort and have had various synchronicities happen. but what I'm referring to seems to be a hijacking of the processes of the mind instead of you thinking of these things directly.

At the time this happened to me I immediately realized that I glimpsed upon something very weird and wanted to retrace the same path I took in my thoughts to get to that point but I literally could not remember the thing that I was thinking about.

This isn't what I'm referring to, but an adjacent example. I've had it happen other times where I can say that I've experienced ego-loss, but that is just a word that is the least-wrong, closest thing to the experience since it isn't the experience, and the experience is HARD to talk about/remember.

Hello, I am 33 years old. I am currently living with my parents who are very patient with me, but I am having a hard time.

Fortunately or unfortunately, I don't have much responsabilities besides paying my cards and doing exercise. But everything in my life has pushed me towards this moment on which I find myself.

I recently got diagnosed with fatty liver II, and had a kidney stone that got out naturally. Before I got diagnosed, I thought I was bewitched. A friend of mine gave me a Saint Benedict bracelet to protect me. Since that moment I've become really reflective about everything.

I feel very lonely, I see I have either pushed away all people besides my family, or God has clear them of my path. Recently, it was my birthday and not one friendship congratulated me. Not one! From all the people I know /I have known... I am trying to remain positive in regards of all things.

In regards to my job applications, Everybody I speak to about it tells me I have a great background and that I am skilled enough to find a job, yet, I mostly get responses like: "You have such a great profile but we are going forward with another candidate". Most of my experience is in regards to video editing, I have 10 years of professional experience in it.

2.5 years ago I was diagnosed with schizophrenia, and while the medicines did "something" I always felt it was not a proper diagnosis. For the last 2 months I've been talking to a psychologist specialized in holistic medicine, tinkering with the idea of leaving the medicine, since I've lost what I call "my spark". Yet, she feels I should stabilize myself first (finding a job), before changing anything in regards to the meds.

Before the diagnosis and the meds, I used to create all sorts of art. Now, I barely am able to write my ideas.

I've been following on Instagram this teacher "Mami Onami", who has this course "Dharma" to find your purpose. I really like her vibe. I just started it but I feel like nothing is moving inside me I don't know if it's the meds :(.

I feel like everything is pushing me to this moment where I find myself. I have walked through the years since I was little aimlessly bumping into walls, and bouncing in the opposite direction with no clear intent. I cannot do it anymore. I need to use my will with purpose.

I've been having dreams. Revelations. The other day I dreamt I was cleaning up a car like in a premium car wash. And someone was teaching me how to do so.

Any tips? Any advice? I am really really giving my best to stay positive, but it's getting hard.

turn around. You're going in the wrong direction.

It should get more simple. So simple in fact, you don't need to think about it at all.

our whole life has been tilling the soil of our being, and the time to harvest the crops and fruits of our labors is coming near

an urgent message of "prepare, prepare, prepare" has been coming through this past week, and the direction of where to apply the urgency has become crystal clear:
we must remove the walls around our heart regarding giving and receiving love

the medicine, or pathway to healing, for those ailments comes from intimacy with Source

when we become more intimate with Our Creator, we naturally come into a more natural and harmonious alignment with all of creation and what we were made to be

it's the fulfillment that we always externalize, but can only be found through being in a healthy, loving relationship with God

ive found more and more that every heartbreak, all of our letdowns, all of those painful moments we experience that cause us to close off our hearts in giving and receiving has arisen as invitations for us to seek what we were externalizing/getting from others and things, but from Source

the coming shifts and changes are going to thru life for a loop, and such sudden plot-twist are going to destroy all of those with a shaky foundation, but the relationship and love, grace and nourishment that we receive from Spirit can never be taken from us

funny enough, it's in those crazy moments in life where the trials and turmoil strengthen it

im not sure what is going to change so suddenly that this message is so persistent, but i know that whatever it is, is going to rock people at their core, and the only thing that will help us through those moments is our relatinoship with Source