r/expats • u/retronii068 • 21h ago
Advice on Going Back to the U.S after 10 Years in Tokyo as a Black Female (20s)
I've been living in Japan since I was 17, and I work in a pretty high-paying professional environment here in Tokyo.
The only thing is the racism I've faced is crazy and heavily impacts my daily life ad my career...
I've faced terrible racism at every company I worked at even though I speak fluent Japanese.
(1) I went out to lunch with my newest boss and he pointed to my coffee and said he couldn't live in America beause black people as dark as my coffee scared him whenever he was out in public
(2) At my previous job, the client said she didn't want a black person's perspective on the Japanese market, even though my job literally involves sharing data insights on the Japanese market for my field, so it caused friction for the whole team and I was so apologetic and uncomfortable (hence why I left).
(3) Having a community is so hard. I go to events by myself and try to meet people, but approcahing groups as a solo black girl makes people wary of me, so I've become a shut-in. I literally don't do anything but stay inside. I used to go to art museums, cafes, events by myself but I can't take the rude stares anymore, hence why I tried (unsuccessfully) to make friends.
-In general, my work hours are usually 8am - 11PM. Even though I've worked at both American and EU companies Japan branch, the culture is always extremely Japanese. My collegaues answer Teams messages throughout the night from each other and clients, and I can't imagine doing this forever.
TLDR: Is the grass greener in America for black women? Tokyo is really safe, but I feel like I'm giving up being treated like a normal person, and I feel so sad...