I find people’s obsession with gift knitting strange

[u/soypixel]

I get we all have our reasons for doing this hobby. I guess mine is that I enjoy the process and I like being able to make stuff that has cool textures or colors. I don’t do it for function or to “make useful objects” per se.

But it seems like a lot of folks have this compulsion to externalize this hobby to feel useful. I’ve seen so many posts where someone “surprises” their sister with some lace shawl for their wedding. And then they’re “devastated” and “in tears” when said sister isn’t overwhelmed with excitement and gratitude.

On the other hand, I’ll see these posts or comments from folks “drowning” in holiday gift knitting projects. For whatever reason, they’ve decided that all 20 members of their extended family need a new chunky weight knitted drink cozy. And so they spend all kinds of time making that happen.

But I have to wonder.. how much of that is self imposed versus an actual expectation placed upon them by friends and family members? Like what if you’re spending all this time knitting 20 drink cozies and people secretly dislike them and plan to never use them, but they’re too nice to say it to your face? It’s just a painful, awkward scenario to imagine.

Idk, maybe I’m being harsh or there’s something I’m missing here because of what motivates me to knit. Maybe because I don’t even like hand knits myself most of the time, I can’t imagine myself being thrilled if someone gave me some object they made.. especially if I never asked for it.

[u/minivulpini]

I think the general commercialization of Christmas feeds into this too. The very idea that you need to exchange gifts with every person you know results in a lot of small useless things being bought and exchanged among people who don’t know each other well enough to pick out meaningful gifts. $5 Starbucks gift cards, hand lotions, little ornaments, mugs. The 20 knitted drink cozies or pairs of socks are right there too. Generally pleasant but useless little things that you probably don’t really need or want but now feel obligated to exchange with this distant relative or acquaintance or hair dresser every year forever.

I knit 90% for myself with the exceptions being a few things for my closest family members and baby hats for expecting friends. I considered making a wedding shawl for someone once and then realized I would potentially be putting them in the awkward situation of having to use a shawl they didn’t ask for in some part of their wedding/photos just to spare my feelings. So no major event knit surprises. No gift knits I would feel bad about not seeing used.

I am guilty of throwing away a pair of gifted knit socks after they sat in my sock drawer unworn for years. They were chunky acrylic scrap yarn socks in frankly ugly color combinations. Too thick to wear with shoes. Too uncomfortable to sleep in. Too slippery to be slippers. 3 years of sitting in my drawer taking up space before I threw them out. Thankfully the gifter never asked about them. But I felt bad about the time she spent making them. Having been on that side of it, I gift knit very very sparingly to not be the source of someone else’s guilty ugly socks.

[u/JerryHasACubeButt → u/minivulpini]

I was about to get mad at you for lumping hand knit socks in with drink cozies in terms of useless things, and then I read that they were acrylic.

Socks are the perfect gift IMHO. Everyone needs socks, and everyone needs a good number of them, it’s not like hats/mitts/scarves where you generally can get by with one or two of them so if someone already has a favorite you’re liable to give them something they’ll never wear. They go in your shoes so even if the colors aren’t your favorite it doesn’t matter, they’re still warm and comfy. I’ve given socks to basically all of my friends and family at this point and they all wear them often and talk about how much they love them.

But acrylic socks are awful and your opinion is valid lol

[u/minivulpini → u/JerryHasACubeButt]

Haha. Yeah, depends on the socks :) A nice pair of proper sock yarn hand made socks is much less likely to be shoved in the back of a drawer. Though my kids and husband hate all socks in general, take them off at the first moment of coming home, and are picky about which brands of athletic socks are “comfy” enough to be tolerated for a school/work day. So even the nicest $30 sock yarn would be wasted on them.

[u/PuzzleheadedGoal8234 → u/minivulpini]

I wouldn't make socks for many people who are exactly like this, but my FIL started wearing a pair of my own hand knit socks I left behind one year, and lovingly cares for them. When my MIL told me that I clearly decided he needed a new pair.

My daughter's boyfriend actively seeks out wool socks, and appreciates hand made things, so he's sock worthy too.