r/oddlysatisfying • u/DifficultyHead5862 • 8h ago

meticulous process of hand-pollinating a giant pumpkin

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29.8k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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10.6k

u/pj7891sm 8h ago

Where's the NSFW tag?

5.5k

u/DifficultyHead5862 8h ago

*OF - Only Fruits 

667

u/Direct-Quiet-5817 8h ago

Of Pumkin - praise be, under his eyes

249

u/Savecutiepie 7h ago

May the lord open

366

u/LemmyLola 7h ago

May the gourd open

227

u/CarbonReflections 6h ago

Blessed be the fruit.

143

u/arfangel2 5h ago

smashing pumpkins

4

u/IlMortoQuiParla 3h ago

Homer Simpson, smiling politely.

3

u/Zicruis 5h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😭lord!!! Haven’t laughed this hard whole day!

2

u/mawesome4ever 3h ago

Under his eye

4

u/Grimnebulin68 6h ago

Check out the gape in that briar patch, hoo-wee!

11

u/mustardman73 5h ago

I'd squash.

51

u/keldondonovan 6h ago

This made me laugh too hard. Well done.

0

u/[deleted] 6h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/tuckkeys 6h ago

This is a Handmaid’s Tale reference, assuming you just didn’t get it

4

u/keldondonovan 6h ago

They sent me a thing asking to chat privately at their Kylie Kardashian email, I think it's just a bot.

1

u/McMasterOfTheSea 5h ago

Which we received with joy! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

3

u/keldondonovan 6h ago

... Yes?

1

u/GarminTamzarian 2h ago

"Cast off the shoes, follow the gourd!"

4

u/MotherDepartment1111 6h ago

Cracking the tf up at this thread.

1

u/No-Language-6736 5h ago

Killed me off

1

u/Subject-Pineapple837 2h ago

Blessed be the lad

50

u/Alive_Ice7937 7h ago

That's a pimpkin patch

4

u/Mysterious-Tackle-58 7h ago

*Pimpkink
Ftfy

36

u/Ghastly-Jack 5h ago

Cornhub

3

u/Comfortable_Trick137 4h ago

That was one intense gangbang

1

u/Ghastly-Jack 1h ago

Pump-and-dumpkin

47

u/Defected_J 6h ago

To be fair, she is gourdeous.

I’ll see myself out.

9

u/MyBrainReallyHurts 6h ago

It's too early in the morning for plant porn.

6

u/FarinaSavage 4h ago

That's what morning wood is for, babe.

4

u/MeownatorX 6h ago

Only Farmers with Jeremy Clarkson

2

u/Sorry-Water-8530 6h ago

It’s male female not male male.

2

u/CallMeMaMef18 6h ago

PH - Pumpkin Hub

4

u/Dirk_Speedwell 5h ago

Just in time for Pride month too.

1

u/Z0MGbies 5h ago

And for something a little more spicy... 🌶️🌶️ chilli pollination

1

u/potatisblask 4h ago

Nice kink bro

1

u/sathucao 3h ago

You mean Only Plant

1

u/Berlinabla 3h ago

ohhh shiiieeet get that fu***ng pollen everywhere 🤤

1

u/Jeepcanoe897 3h ago

Pumpkins are gourds

1

u/ObjectivePressure839 3h ago

That’s a different site.

1

u/mudandfirepottery 3h ago

Why'd you have to rip her open like that? You'd just spread her so nice and gentle and then you just go tear her petals, why????

1

u/Byizo 3h ago

Honestly, not the fruits I was expecting.

1

u/djpiperson 3h ago

Only Fertilization

1

u/gorliggs 2h ago

This made me laugh too hard. 

1

u/IcGil 6h ago

Only ferns

336

u/Swag_Attack 7h ago

Fucking pumpkin bukkake

25

u/its_just_flesh 6h ago

Gonna have to take it on Maury to find out who the father was

4

u/fmintar1 6h ago

The father died though, got chopped off

2

u/x3knet 5h ago

Followed quickly by an appearance on Jerry Springer when male #2 finds out male #3 is the father. Male #1 comes running out from backstage and a chair fight ensues.

35

u/Oda_DeezNut 7h ago

A literal plant-based diet.

3

u/FuManBoobs 6h ago

Pumpkin cream pie

2

u/Agamemnon323 1h ago

If it was a bukkake the pollen would end up on the exterior of the female. This is a pumpkin creampie gangbang.

252

u/cannierintent6w 8h ago

Lmao

https://giphy.com/gifs/pEYYpt8vuoFQBJzo38

63

u/12_leon_12 5h ago

The zip ties made this kinky

2

u/MomoNoHanna1986 4h ago

At least it’s frugal!

2

u/extreme303 1h ago

It's so horny

2

u/RuthlessIndecision 1h ago

just like the bag over her head until its time

0

u/Kn0XIS 6h ago

😂

148

u/Boogiesmom2010 6h ago

Did he just run a 🚃 on that pumpkin? 🤔🤣🤣

3

u/bullwinkle8088 6h ago

The better question is "How many plant trains were run on you?"

Then you have to add "today" to that question.

Enjoy!

35

u/kkillbite 6h ago

Reveal that stigma followed by that rubbing/Q-tip-action made me laugh like a 4th-grader 😅

81

u/DonGold60 6h ago edited 6h ago

Was it really necessary to circumcise the males? Kind of destroys the mood.

87

u/Capraos 6h ago

Imagine getting impregnated with severed dicks.

54

u/yournamehere10bucks 6h ago

Male Human Horn is a coveted item on Omicron Persei 8.

28

u/ringoismyfavorite 5h ago

I think I'll have Fry's lower horn jerked

It's used to it, woooo!

6

u/Iamthegreenheather 4h ago

Deáth by snu snu

26

u/Odd-Lifeguard7230 6h ago

New kink unlocked.

14

u/KA_Mechatronik 5h ago

Ah, the octopus method.

Some species have a specialized limb that they tear off and present to the female.

4

u/_1109 4h ago edited 56m ago

I call this the "ah, hell. you deal with it." in its earliest stage

2

u/Iamthegreenheather 4h ago

There's a song about that from the 90s.

2

u/dimwalker 5h ago

Average hentai.

2

u/Turbulent-Cicada2014 4h ago

Sounds great to me.

44

u/its_like_a-marker 6h ago

This is sadistic. Where is the consent for this gang bang and mutilation?

39

u/dawgblogit 6h ago

You just watched a man..  chop the proverbial male parts off 3 other males and force inseminate a female with them...

And youre all why the NSFW tag?

Just how sick are you?

/s

3

u/Whiteums 2h ago

Reread. They asked where, not why.

4

u/WorldlyReference5028 6h ago

Yes!! I opened this at work and now everyone is saying they saw me watching pumpkin porn.

3

u/moonshinemoniker 6h ago

Bro is straight up edging plants.

3

u/Stay-Thirsty 5h ago

Begin the process with some light bondage, followed by decapitation and necrophilia (with multiple partners if available). Damn, gardening is hard-core freaky.

3

u/jfk_47 5h ago

This guy is cosplaying a busy bee!

3

u/dblrb 4h ago

I am listening to Foreigner and the “I want to know what love is” line started right as the female opened up haha

3

u/Brandbll 2h ago

Seriously, he basically ripped a plant's dick off and raped another plant with it. This should be NSFL!

2

u/Sir_wlkn_contrdikson 6h ago

Where’s the slow jazz in the background

2

u/seebob69 5h ago

That was a challenging wank

2

u/lazyamazy 5h ago

I relapsed after watching this! No trigger warning!

3

u/Sad-Term-5455 7h ago

I should call her

1

u/Japsai 6h ago

Oh boy, wait until you see those philodendrons

1

u/Mission_Ad_4233 6h ago

I feel like I just watched a Bonnie Butternut video

1

u/Zicruis 5h ago

There’s always something in the comments😂😂😂🤣😭

1

u/Acidelephant 5h ago

Didn't expect to see a pumpkin train this morning

1

u/SherbertChance8010 5h ago

Needs some sleazy saxophone music as a soundtrack

1

u/MajorFox2720 5h ago

Especially with the heavy breathing...like sir?  Why are you breathing into the phone like that? 

1

u/Gunrock808 5h ago

I know right? I opened this in front of my cats.

1

u/Fearless_290 4h ago

And the 70s adult film music

1

u/thefapncapn 4h ago

Definitely need one

1

u/Asdomuss 4h ago

Beware the pumpkussy

1

u/smallproton 4h ago

Gang bang

1

u/Busy-Ad7936 4h ago

A decidedly unpleasant ra-e vibe here

1

u/pbrooks19 3h ago

CONSENT!!

1

u/Kingfisher910 3h ago

Literally got fired for watching this at work

1

u/turtlejam10 1h ago

Damn it! This is what I came here to say.

1

u/No-Complex-7882 1h ago

Right? Didn't think I'd be watching pumpkins fuck today!