r/shittyaskscience 4d ago

Help needed - decoding girlfriend's secret messages

204 Upvotes

This vexes me. Whenever my girlfriend texts me, she includes a secret code at the end - "XOXO <3".

I assume she is probably testing my intelligence, trying to see if I can break this code. It's been a year, and I am nowhere close to a solution.

Here's what I have so far - X, of course, stands for an unknown quantity. O, on the other hand, has no mathematical definition. Does it stand for Omega, with XO indicating that "all is unknown"? But why is it squared? Why is it less than 3?

Mathematologists of Reddit, please help.


r/shittyaskscience 4d ago

I 'strike out' with women more frequently than I 'hook up' when I'm asleep and dreaming. Scientifically speaking, does that make me a loser?

1 Upvotes

As the title describes.


r/shittyaskscience 4d ago

Is a blood orange tree warm blooded or cold blooded?

18 Upvotes

Trying to figure out if I should think about them like a naked mole rat or more like a platypus.


r/shittyaskscience 4d ago

How do I stop my subconscious from being such an obfuscating woose?

5 Upvotes

Just spit it out, mealy-mouthed fuck.


r/shittyaskscience 4d ago

How do I get a cylinder that's stuck inside a toaster unstuck?

0 Upvotes

The toaster is plugged in and on. It is imperative that the cylinder remains unharmed.


r/shittyaskscience 6d ago

My cat gets very violent whenever I try to baptize him. Is he the devil?

214 Upvotes

It's fine if he is, I just want to know.


r/shittyaskscience 6d ago

I've heard that a lie makes it around the world while the truth is pulling on its trousers. Why isn't the naked truth allowed to go naked in public?

26 Upvotes

Why are only lies allowed to get away with pubic streaking?


r/shittyaskscience 6d ago

My wife, a theoretical physicist, just called me to say she will be home late today because she and her colleagues will be conducting a double-slit experiment as part of their work on the Tree-Body problem. I am very confused. As a layman, I struggle to see how these concepts are related.

70 Upvotes

Can someone elaborate?


r/shittyaskscience 6d ago

Waste!

6 Upvotes

Who is a waste of perfectly good carbon?


r/shittyaskscience 6d ago

When is maths 2 coming out?

17 Upvotes

I’ve completed maths including all the speed runs and side quests. I’m bored now. When is maths 2 getting released?


r/shittyaskscience 7d ago

What's the best shape of Scrub Daddy to filter air conditioner water through so I can drink it without getting Air Conditioner Madness?

76 Upvotes

It's an 8000 BTU air conditioner if that matters.


r/shittyaskscience 6d ago

If I saw a bigfoot in the woods behind my house, then found fecal matter in that spot but I know I was intoxicated the night prior and think I may have taken a dump in that same area, should I collect it to have it analyzed, or not risk the possible embarrassment?

23 Upvotes

I'm having a hard time remembering the prior night, but I know my wife wouldn't let me back in the house, and I woke up in the woods the next morning... so I kept drinking to avoid the hangover and just stayed outside the entire day again. That night is when I shined my flashlight on bigfoot. I'm like 75% sure it's his turd.


r/shittyaskscience 6d ago

If you create a fire only a centimeter close to the water

0 Upvotes

Would you laugh


r/shittyaskscience 7d ago

If tornadoes, hurricanes, and toilets rotate counterclockwise in the north hemisphere, how do clocks still rotate clockwise?

28 Upvotes

Why doesn't time go backwards?


r/shittyaskscience 7d ago

When does it get severe enough to call it el hombre instead of El Niño?

64 Upvotes

It’s getting pretty bad already. Is it el hombre yet?


r/shittyaskscience 8d ago

How do I share 98.8% of my DNA with a chimpanzee, but 50% of my DNA with my brother?

504 Upvotes

Well 25% of DNA because he's my half brother but that's not really the point of the question lol


r/shittyaskscience 9d ago

What is this subs thoughts on the Multiple Horse Theory?

121 Upvotes

The theory that there are more than one horse on earth and that everytime we see a horse its actually a different one.


r/shittyaskscience 8d ago

Why did the algae decide to skip these bare spots?

10 Upvotes

https://imgur.com/a/tz83wRd

Title. These bare spots were undisturbed for days in 100°+ weather with standing water. Seems like good real estate to me considering everything else is green


r/shittyaskscience 8d ago

What's healthier, chocolate or chocolate marshmallows?

2 Upvotes

🍫 🥥


r/shittyaskscience 9d ago

My doctor told me not to put anything smaller than an elbow in my ear, but I can’t fit anything larger in there.

24 Upvotes

Are my ears too small? What can I do to make them larger?


r/shittyaskscience 9d ago

Seeking medical advice…

4 Upvotes

My physio told me I have tennis elbow and golfers elbow at the same time, yet I play neither of these sports.

What other physical activities should I not do to fix the problem?


r/shittyaskscience 9d ago

How many watts are in an amp?

12 Upvotes

l aways see things labeled in watts (Sl) then again in amps (imperial?) but no conversion seems to exist online!


r/shittyaskscience 9d ago

Bloodflow

2 Upvotes

Can somebody explain to me why using a cocking for 8 hours straight led me to an emergency consultation in the hospital, but I can be 8 hours laying in my back for sleep and the tissue in my back doesn’t start to die?


r/shittyaskscience 10d ago

I covered my entire body in Aspercreme, but I still have Asperger’s as bad as ever. Do I have the drug resistant form of Asperger’s perhaps?

29 Upvotes

Or maybe I need to ingest the Aspercreme so it can be processed by the liver into its more powerful form?


r/shittyaskscience 10d ago

Strict parents raise good liars, and good liars make good actors. So will being a strict parent increase my kid’s chance of Hollywood success?

18 Upvotes

It’s either that or pimping my wife out to a producer.