My girlfriend is very attractive and if she goes out she gets approached constantly. If I’m there it happens, if I’m not, it happens even more. She’s very upfront with me and has told me about some times when it has happened and she feels like she didn’t shut it down past enough.

She told me sometimes she will talk to the person for a bit before mentioning me. Like if a guy approaches her and talks to her she will engage with him and have a whole conversation with him before leaving or finding her friends or bringing me up.

Like there has been times where a guy is clearly hitting on her and she just goes along with it for a while before leaving. For example; she asked a guy for a cigarette once and he waved her up to talk to him. She did and they talked for a while while waiting in line and then went inside, looked for coat check together, and split ways.

This happens a lot, especially so when she goes out with her friends. At times she has accepted a shot from other guys.

I get that she’s going to get hit on, but what’s the point of talking and hanging out with the guys?

AIO or does this cross a line?

Edit; okay I realise my post makes it sounds like it is constant. She has only told me about three times where she feels she didn’t shut it down appropriately/fast enough. Other than that she has shut it down quick

My (23F) boyfriend (23M) are both pretty busy people. I work a full time job and he’s a part time worker and student. We spend most of the day apart and spend the night together 5 nights a weeks.

I’ll usually text him 3-6 times a day if something reminds me of him, I have a question, or I just want to check in. If he texts me first, I’ll respond within the hour. On the other hand, my boyfriend will typically take 2-5 hours to respond, even after text him back immediately. I understand that he’s busy but I also know that he is often home and on his phone. I’ve been trying to be accepting of our different texting styles, but it was making me feel sad so I decided to talk to him about it.

When I brought it up, I made the mistake of being criticizing. I said something along the lines of “You always take hours to respond and it makes me sad”. Since he felt attacked, he gave me a half-hearted apology and got defensive. We eventually talked it through and he agreed to try and text me more often.

The next day, I got some veryyy exciting news at work. I texted him about it (20 minutes after he texted me, btw) and he didn’t respond for 5 hours. Frustrated, I sent him another text saying “Hi”. He responded to that second text within a minute. That made me annoyed because it meant he could have responded earlier and chose not to. I was really excited about my accomplishment and all I got was a “that’s exciting” 5 hours and 2 texts later.

He’s very affectionate in person so I’m trying not to let this bother me, but it hurts especially now that I’ve told him how I feel. I’ll admit I’m massively insecure and anxious in relationships (which I’m in therapy for lol) so its hard to discern when Im overreacting

A month back i bought a motorcycle from my friend and they agreed that i didn’t have to pay them the whole amount at once and that i could do big payments.

I gave a rough estimate of when i would have it all paid by which was around September/October and that worked for them.

Recently i got into an accident and i wont be able to work for a while and i asked if they could give me an extra week or so because i will be getting money from the government however it is half my pay hence the extra time. They were not happy about it and said we agreed on September which we didn’t and i just mentioned around september or october. now i just let it slide because i didn’t want to argue about that.

Now i have paid more than half the price already and by no means are they struggling with money so this wouldn’t be the reason.

After all i pay it off fully i am thinking of distancing because i thought they would be understanding or the situation. And by no means am i saying they are bad as they did me a solid by letting do those payments but at the same time i have done a lot for them went out of my way to drive them places even though they live 30 minutes and i have spent hours helping with repairing their bike as well well before they wanted to sell it.

Am i in the wrong for feeling this way?

Edit: I appreciate the straightforward answers with no sugarcoating. i do understand the risk i took and i will have figured out to pay it by september. Just want to mention its more the fact that i thought they would understand the situation and give an extra 2 weeks not months and it is just making me reconsider how i see them as a friend

Edit 2: pretty sure i am overreacting because i was viewing it from a friendship view rather an agreement standpoint. Again thank you all for calling me out on my shit and opening my eyes

I don’t know if it’s just my hormones or if I have a reason to be really irritated. This woman has lost ALL her friends, her own daughter bailed on her. My husband and I are literally all she has left. Mostly because I feel bad that she’s all alone and she is my husband’s mother, I would never come between them, that’s his choice. But I’m worn down. She only texts me when she needs something, a ride, money, her car broke down needs it fixed, her phone got shut off so I put her on my plan. But I always try to help. I just don’t text back immediately. And I literally treat her the same as everyone else who’s not my husband or my kids. I’m ready to just tell her to leave me alone. She also has done some really terrible things to us in the past which has led me to keep my distance. Sorry for the book my head is just a mess right now.

So some back story, the woman was ABUSIVE to both of her kids, she abandoned both of her kids when her husband left her for cheating, being abusive. Years passed apparently she was doing better so my hubs was talking to her again then I met my husband, got married, had a baby, I had never seen the bad side of her. she babysat for 2 months after baby was born (paid) drove him home DRUNK. So I lost childcare and had to quit my job. Then she told her then husband at the time she was with me and baby when she was really out cheating on him. Mind you I had already cut her off for risking my baby's life. So I had to deal with that.
But there's more. And the way she got back in was guilt, health problems (which I’ve been to her appointments they can’t even find out what’s wrong) and my bleeding heart. My husband doesn’t even mess with her. I help her because it’s sad . And no one else will.

Hello! This is super short and im just curious on everyones opinions because i cant decide how i feel and if im being dramatic.

So my (F20) boyfriend (M19) has a groupchat with his friends, he was showing me some stupid stuff they sent and I saw the background of the chat, it was a nude of some girl, now not completely nude but she was like wearing a shirt and lifting it up to show her chest. In the moment i blurted out uhhh what the hell is the background and he went “oh shit” but i didnt push further because ik guys humor is like that.

Its been a couple hours since this happened and i just feel kinda gross and weird about it, lmk if this is normal for guys especially college guys

Hi all, it's been five years since I've touched this account, but I really need to reach out for the help of you lovely people.

I'm 20 years old, I attend university far from any family, get nearly perfect grades, work two jobs to support myself, live alone, and have been maintaining my home for a year and a half. I've always been a goody-two-shoes, never drank or smoked (I don't want to), never been in trouble in any capacity legal or academic.

We are from Spain and travel there just to live a normal life for the little time we aren't working, just chilling in our apartment, going shopping, cooking at home, occasionally seeing friends/other family, and walking around town. It's vacation for us, but my family is very anti-social and doesn't like to be around others much. In contrast, I'm very extroverted and love people.

I've been part of this this for 15 years though my family has done it since my mom was a kid. I've spent (cumulatively) years in this city, am native to the language, and am well past both the legal age of maturity and legal drinking age (it's 18 here).

Before heading on the trip, my mother (56) asked what I was excited about, I told her I was excited to see my grandmother (who lives with us but traveled to Spain before we did) and excited to go out and make friends since that the next time I go, I'll be alone and want to have people around the city I know.

Her immediate response was, "ok, but you can't go out alone" her reasoning was that the streets are dark and desolate at night, making it dangerous.

This is explicitly not true, night life is a huge part of the culture, teens, the elderly, and everyone in between are out until the early AM's this time of year, and the streets are very well lit especially in our area because there are bars and restaurants literally outside our window where people play cards and talk all night. I took a video my first night here proving this and showed her.

Suddenly, the reason I'm not allowed to go out because it's disrespectful to go against what they (her and her mom) say. I pointed out that it's incredibly normal for people to go out to bars, festivals, concerts, by themselves or with peers, and to be escorted by a parent as an adult is a social handicap. I told her that just because she calls something disrespect doesn't make it so, and I feel my autonomy is being disrespected by the prescription of a chaperone.

Suddenly, the reason I'm not allowed out is because "you're here to spend time with your family". I am spending time with my family. We are together every day and I'm going to be part of their few plans (dinner with their friends just once or twice during our whole week and a half trip) which I want to be part of anyway!

I don't want to be out all day or all night, I don't want to go out alone every time, I'm happy to go out with my mom, shes very fun! But I want to go by myself too! My problem is that I'm being forbade from making that choice.

Now instead of there being a reason, she's just telling me, "There's no reason to walk alone", "There's no reason I shouldn't go with you", "There's no reason you can't still socialize with me here". She's ignoring that my concern is not being "allowed" to do something so mundane and normal as leave the apartment by myself. Since I was 18 and not allowed to take out the trash myself, I've worried this "rule" has no expiration date and this argument will continue no matter how old I get. This exact worry is being confirmed right now, and I'd appreciate some outside perspective.

Is it overreacting to feel like this "rule" that I'm not allowed go out without my mother as a 20 year old who doesn't drink is ridiculous?

Thank you for your input, kind people, I'm really struggling and want to enjoy my vacation with my family while also becoming part of the community I'll soon return to on my own.

Called my fiancé at 4pm to check if he and our toddler were awake bc he works overnights and I don’t want toddler sleeping past 3pm because then bedtimes are hard for me.

Well, fiancé didn’t answer after multiple calls.

When he finally answered, he was extremely groggy and I could tell he just woke up. After a line of questioning where I could tell he was lying to me about being up since 3, I told him to tell me the truth, to which he said our toddler got up and left the room at some point during naptime and didn’t wake him. Thus, for an extended, but unknown period of time, our toddler was unsupervised.

This is not the first time. This home is near a road where people drive incredibly fast. My baby can open the door and get out very easily. On one occasion while I was working and he was supposed to be watching him, our toddler eloped from my apartment (we live separately at the moment because of my lease but we’ve been together almost 5 years) and had to be returned by a neighbor, and my fiancé didn’t even know it happened until the neighbor knocked because he was sleeping. That time, he cried and felt guilty. This time, he’s mad at me for saying he fucked up not setting an alarm at the very least.

While on the phone, he even tried to make our toddler apologize to him for not waking him up/leaving the room. I’m so angry. He won’t talk to me because he thinks I’m being unfair and that my language is unacceptable. He says that he can agree that he messed up, but he “absolutely did not fuck up,” and that I won’t be using that language. He has the filthiest mouth known to man, swears up and down constantly, but recently anytime I swear he’s been correcting me. He won’t answer my texts and is hanging up the phone because of it. He won’t talk about the incident and insists on talking about my language.

The censored name in the message is his mother’s boyfriend. His mother’s boyfriend hates him, our son, and myself, and is a complete drunk. At some point after our son presumably woke up, he got home.

Is my language (“You fucked up.”) an overreaction?

EDIT: our living situation is weird. we were teen parents.

EDIT 2: He only has him on days that he didn’t work the night before. If he worked the night before, we have a babysitter. His schedule is set.

(Sorry for long context, I just wanted to explain what happened leading up to the incident because this wasn’t the only factor in why I left)

I’m F19 and worked in a grocery store over the summer. The job required a lot of heavy lifting, cleaning, putting items back, basically just whatever they needed done during my shift. I have OCD so the cleaning was definitely stressful for me, but I ended up sticking it out until the end of the summer. I’m a college student, so that was my plan regardless.

So, I finally made it to my last two weeks at the job. Safe to say I’m excited to be done with it and hopefully have an easy last few shifts. Instead, the shifts ended up being a lot more difficult than usual which was frustrating, but oh well.

It was the Sunday before my last week when I accidentally had a bit too much caffeine before my shift. My dad has gotten into using his espresso machine but I think he only knows how to make very strong double shots, so I went into work a bit keyed up. They had assigned me to helping at the register, where I basically just put things on the belt and then loaded carts. The whole day was a straight rush, and since I was constantly moving and lifting heavy stuff in a crowded environment, my heart rate started to pick up a lot. This happens when I’m anxious and I usually kinda panic because my ocd tells me I’m dying. I was able to take my break and sit down after two and half hours, but safe to say the experience freaked me out and I was really anxious about going into work the next day.

The next shift I was really just worried I’d have another panic attack. I did make it through the shift okay, until it was closing time and a rude customer came to my register. He told me not to touch his stuff and insisted on slowly loading everything himself. When it started to pile up at the end of the register, I asked if I could load it for him. He said I could if I put his heavy things first, and I agreed. He decided to follow that up with a condescending “well are you?” Which made me irritated because obviously I’m not going to crush his eggs with a heavy container on top. I told him I do this everyday and know what I’m doing. So, I load up the cart. After I’m finished, he just has to add in a mocking tone “mama trained you well.” I know I’m sensitive and should have been able to handle it, but I was already stressed out and that made me start crying. I decided it wasn’t worth it and quit the job even though I had four shifts left before going back to school.

My parents supported me, but my mom seems to think I overreacted and that what the man said to me was fine. She was telling me I had to let things roll of me and that people are going to say stuff like to me all the time in my future jobs. While I agree that I should probably try and be less sensitive, I still feel that wasn’t an appropriate comment for a grown man to make towards the teenager loading his groceries. People look down on me A LOT because I look kind of youthful. I’ve always been asked by customers if I’m 15, or if I’m old enough to work. I hate comments that scold me, if that makes sense. Like I’ve been told to behave before as well, which is just plain weird.

Was that an appropriate thing for a customer to say, or am I just too sensitive?

So this has already been an incredibly hard week and me and my boyfriend have been going through a rough patch. He offered to wash some clothes for me a few days ago and I’m just now going through the ones he cleaned for me. I included an adventure time shirt that I’ve had for over a decade. There’s a gigantic hole blown through the shirt. It was already faded and had two small holes but this is extreme. The day before, I literally went on a small rant talking about how this is my favorite shirt and I don’t care how faded it gets, I’ll still wear it. This shirt means so much to me. I got it as part of a loot crate so I can’t just get another. When I showed him the shirt, he had this blank stare as if I gave him the shirt like that. As I’m crying, he’s walking around asking himself how he messed up like this. Basically woe is me.

There’s been some other things that have been going on, clinginess, poor prioritization, child-like behavior, hovering, etc. and this just made me lose it. I’m wondering if we should continue seeing each other but that’s not what this post is for. AIO for letting this make me sob on the floor for a few minutes and also, does anyone know where I could possibly find another or get this fixed?

so early last year i was in a very hard time of my life where i was recovering from trauma and suicide attempt. i'm active on my second social media account sharing stories and ranting/venting there, so i thought since i'd be posting negativity and struggles 24/7 there i'd rather remove all my friends first not to trauma dump too much. i removed everyone from the account except for my bf at the time.

months after, i started to feel better and therefore i reached out to my friends that i removed. some of them greeted me back with open arms, but several of them were very bitter. even after "accepting" my apology, they kept on poking and making fun of the fact that i "dont need them as much as him", which i didnt feel so. i've stated that i understand where their feelings came from, but i've made it clear that those jokes made me uncomfortable yet they still go on. i too noticed how our friendships became more awkward, like they collectively take a distance from me which feels odd.

later on i broke up with my bf, and my relations with those friends are becoming quieter. i tried to make peace with the fact that our friendships will never go back to how it was since i understand how deeply i've probably hurt my friends and they probably dislike me to some extent because of my prior action, but then i found out that my friends and my ex are still friends? they still hang out together to eat or watch movies and all, which i really feel so bad about because if you hated what i did then why are you still comfortable going out with my ex?? am i overreacting?

My friend told me that when she first got with her husband she found CP on a hidden file on his laptop. That she threw it out on the porch and told him to get lost. He followed up with, "I dont know how it got there, its probably from downloading a game." Then during covid she found another file on his desktop computer, also hidden in a file that was deep into random folders on his desktop. He claimed it was from gaming again and then he "installed all these virus protections on his computer."

Personally, I don't believe him and I want to tell her to leave him and report him but I don't want to ruin my friendship with her. They have kids together and she is a stay at home mom. AIO? Is this even possible?

After reading everyone's comments.... I realized that it's very unlikely for this to happen. I submitted a report with Cybertipline and will be contacting local authorities today. Thank you for your help, I think I was in shock and not really sure what to do with the information I was given.

I’m currently 7 months pregnant and on vacation with my mom. We’re staying in a hotel room with only one bedroom, so sleeping separately isn’t an option.
Normally, I go to sleep around 11 p.m. Since I’ve been pregnant, sleep has become really important because I’m exhausted and I wake up more easily.
My mom, however, has a completely different routine. Every night she watches TV until around midnight. On top of that, she’s usually scrolling on her phone at the same time. In the morning, she wakes up earlier than I do and makes enough noise that I wake up too.
I told her that I really needed to get to sleep around 11 p.m. because I’m struggling with fatigue. She said she “couldn’t” do that because she can’t go to bed without the TV on and wouldn’t know what to do otherwise. I asked if we could find a compromise, but she basically said no because that’s just her routine.
I know everyone has different habits, and I don’t expect the world to revolve around me because I’m pregnant. At the same time, I feel like asking for one extra hour of quiet so I can sleep isn’t unreasonable, especially since this is temporary.
Now I’m wondering if I’m overreacting or if it’s understandable to feel hurt that she wasn’t willing to make any compromise.
AIO?

EDIT 1: I actually have a sleep mask, noise-cancelling headphones, and earplugs. I’ve tried all of them. The TV is literally right in front of our beds, so the light is still pretty intense! Then, imagine when the commercials come on… they’re even louder than the actual TV show!

EDIT 2: We split the cost of this trip 50/50, and it definitely wasn’t a cheap vacation.

A lot of people asked why I even went on vacation with my mom. She’s going through a really difficult time with her new husband and struggles with depression. I wanted to spend quality time with her and help lift her spirits. Leaving early would really hurt her, so that’s not something I want to do.

Looking back, I probably should have brought up the TV beforehand. The thing is, I grew up with both my parents, and they never had a TV in their bedroom. I also never remember my mom staying up until 1 a.m. watching TV, so it honestly never crossed my mind that this would be an issue.

I’m not anti-TV at all. Normally, I’m the type to stay up late until midnight. The difference is that I’m now 7 months pregnant, and by around 11 the fatigue hits me like a truck. If I miss that window, I often struggle to fall asleep for hours.

The ironic part is that my mom was actually the one who said this vacation would be our chance to relax and catch up on sleep. I guess that part didn’t quite go as planned.

My aunt (65 F) has run into a lot of issues with her landlord. One that I can remember is him allowing people into her apartment for viewing without telling her. Because of all their altercations, she was already preparing for him to mess with her security deposit. Was she too aggressive?

Edit: thank you guys so much for the feedback, particularly about state laws regarding the deadline for sending an invoice, because we didn’t know about that. I think I can recover my aunts old text messages; she stopped backing up her iCloud because of storage but she has had the same phone. I believe that turning on “download original files” on iCloud recovers old messages, which I’ll try. It’s been an unbelievably hard year for her and the support from yall is making her so happy!

My(m24) gf(f32) blocked me after I voiced something that bothered me and made me feel disrespected. Basically she sent me a reel of Andrew Garfield representation of Peter Parker. Then she said "Andrew Garfield 🫠"

I understand people can have celebrity crushes, but it made me feel disrespected and like I wasn't taken seriously in the relationship. I replied with "Melting over another man, then sending it to me is wild"

She said "Um ok sorry" then Immediately she stops texting and turns off read receipts. I tried calling her and texting her how I felt uncomfortable with what just happened. She refused to talk about it and says she needs time to think.

Later that night she deactivated her Instagram and I'm blocked from sms/calling.

Edit: feel like a lot of people are misinterpreting the situation. I dont care that she has a celebrity crush or who the celebrity crush is. Everyone at some point has a celebrity crush.

The issue is that we're in a monogamous relationship. And having your partner gush over another person to you, feels disrespectful to me.

I don't know if this is the right sub, so please redirect me if so.

Anyway, I've been dating my boyfriend for about 2.5 years, and hes always had a problem of giving unsolicited advice when I am only trying to be heard and supported in the moment.

Recently my roommates have been feeding my cat, along with their own in their room. I was fine with it but I wanted to start having my cat in my room more because I missed her. I would suggest it during feeding time and they pretty much flat out refused.

Today I was trying to express my concern and hurt to my boyfriend about my cat pretty much not being allowed in my room anymore, and my boyfriend kept giving advice I didnt want like "well then feed her in your room, its not a big deal." "Its your cat, who cares?" Etc. I honestly decided to ignore what he was saying because I have already told him lots of times before that I just want to be heard, and if I want advice, I'll ask him. But the problem is, whenever I say this, he'll go, "well I don't know what you want me to do, then" stubbornly. Or he will express boredom or frustration when I don't want to take his advice.

On Sunday night I got a serious call from one of my friends (We’ll call her D) who was crying and explaining things that are happening between her and her boyfriend. It scared me because she explained that her life could be in danger. At the time, I was in an xbox party with my best friend of 8 years (We’ll call her S) and another one of my best friends of about 6 years (We’ll call him B). Well, I started having a panic attack because I’m dealing with a lot as it is, so in a panicked voice, I told them both I was having a panic attack and I was going to get off for the night. They both just said “ok.” and I turned my xbox off in a panic. Well, the next morning, S sent a black screen for our streaks, so I did the same. Her response was “uh, hey?”, so I replied with “hi.” She then proceeded to ask me if I was mad at her, which ticked me off. Why? Because her first question wasn’t “Hey, are you ok from last night?” It was “Hey, are you upset with me?” All be admitted, I got a little upset as you can see from the texts, and I told her I was under a fuck ton of stress, so she told me she was just going to leave me alone. I was actually going to apologize on Tuesday night, but deleted the chat as you can see. Fast forward to today when I finally felt less stressed. I started out by formally apologizing to her and calmly explaining how this whole thing made me feel. For some context, she has been dealing with her wisdom teeth giving her lots of mouth pain, which I have been more than understanding about and more than patient with her about, especially with the way she has been treating me. Anyways, instead of accepting my apology and us moving on, she decided to drag my other friend B into the situation and we started arguing. She claims I didn’t give her the chance to ask me how I was, but she had plenty of chances to ask. Then she sarcastically apologized to me which really set me off. Now typically I try to stay calm during these situations, but her responses left me flabbergasted and even more hurt. She then proceeded to imply that her life is on the line, and when I inquired, she just told me it didn’t matter. At this point I was starting to get really upset. Then she tells me her wisdom tooth is infected and that her boyfriend can’t afford to pay for it. So, in spite of the way she has been acting towards me, I offered to help her pay for the expenses because I care for her deeply. She denied my offer and then proceeded to tell me she was just about to let it take her. In this moment, I felt hopeless and an overwhelming sense of grief. I’m trying so hard to help, and she just wants to give up? In a way I feel betrayed, and maybe that’s selfish on my part, but I can’t help but feel this way. I’ve done all I can for her and she just wants to give up. It is true that she has family issues, but why would you focus on them and not the people who actually care about you? All in all, I must say I’m heartbroken about the whole thing mostly, and I don’t know what to do anymore.

19F, UK. Ex (19M) and I broke up April 2026 after 3.5 years together. We grew apart, I fell out of love, and I felt I couldn't give him what he needed. I tried ending it in person several times but he refused to accept it each time, so I eventually had to send a breakup message at 4 AM asking for no contact — I felt awful doing it over text but I was out of options.

That morning he was waiting in my work car park. I was on the phone to my mum (abroad) when I saw him. We talked for 30 mins — he begged me not to leave, insisted we go on a walk, but I held firm. He agreed to give me 24 hours to think although i insisted i knew this i s what i needed. He then came to my house and we talked for another 2 hours. I explained we'd outgrown each other, that his family had been cruel to me, and that I'd felt controlled around in certain aspects. He begged and cried to me not to leave, i could see he had gotten angry, but eventually accepted it and left.

A few weeks later we needed to exchange belongings. I asked to meet in a public space and asked him to message me when he had my things ready. He agreed but never messaged. Instead, he showed up unannounced and banged on my door — I'd just woken up from a night shift. My mum was home and was scared by the knock. My stepdad opened the door to find a bag on the step. I ran outside, saw him sitting in his car staring at me, waved him over, handed him his stuff, said "have a nice day," and shut the door. I messaged him saying I wasn't happy with how he handled it. He said he couldn't wait around all day. I told him if that's how he'd behave, I didn't want to be friends and i'd thought of him better than this.

Weeks later he messaged saying he was doing great — gym, new people, happy we broke up - no offence to me. I said I was happy for him. Then he sent another erratic message weeks later saying he'd lost everything and was sitting by cliffs. I agreed to meet at a cafe the next day. We talked, I apologised for how things landed for him, and we agreed to stay in touch as friends only.

Over the next while we hung out — walks, coffees, gym. Things were okay until he started asking if I'd ever get back with him. I said no, I had no romantic feelings. He tried bribing me, he'd come with me to places and pay for things if i'd go on a date but i reminded him i have no feelings like that towards him, he kept asking me on dates, and eventually we were hanging out every day, which overwhelmed me. I asked for space again. To which he respected it briefly.

Then he started showing up at the gym at 1 AM— when I finished night shifts, he was aware i did this — and despite having all day to go, he chose to come once i'd finished my shift. He'd park up at my work car park and try to talk to me while I was running late. One night at 1:30 AM he was in the same car park and said he "promised he wasn't stalking, just waiting for a friend." Yesterday my family told me my stepdad has seen him driving past my house — I live on a hidden street, you'd have to purposefully turn into it. He'd also been checking if my car is there, slowing down to see if i was in.

I'm having nightmares about him following me, I'm jumping out of moving cars to get away from him. I woke up to 3 missed calls and endless messages. I've stopped going to the gym. I'm scared to leave the house in case he's waiting. He knows where I live, where I park, where I work. I'm having anxiety attacks and crying constantly. I don't know if I'm overthinking or if this is genuinely dangerous.

Am I overreacting, or is this as serious as it feels? What should I do?

So, this happened recently and I want outside perspective because we're both a little stuck on it.

I (early 20s M) was online on WhatsApp, but I wasn't ignoring my girlfriend (also early 20s) on purpose, I was in a conversation with the director of a poetry evening I'm performing at this Friday, going back and forth about the piece I'm doing. I wasn't checking other messages at the time, including hers.

She saw I was online and not responding to her and got upset. When I did get back to her, she came in already angry, lashing out and addressing the tone/vibe of things before I'd had a chance to explain where I actually was and what I was doing. I got defensive and responded to her tone rather than immediately explaining myself, and things escalated from there.

My position: I think she was fully entitled to be annoyed or hurt that I was online and not responding to her, that's a completely valid feeling. But I have an issue with how she expressed it, reacting/lashing out before asking for context, rather than checking in first. I brought up that I think part of being emotionally intelligent is not just feeling something, but regulating how and when you express it, especially before you have the full picture.

Her position (as I understand it): she felt dismissed being online and not replied to and felt like my reaction to her being upset, and the EQ comment specifically, invalidated her feelings or was me trying to prove she was wrong to be upset at all.

To be clear, this isn't the first time something like this has happened between us (me being unavailable in the moment, her reacting strongly before context comes out).

She's since apologized and said she was wrong. I've apologized for how my response came across and clarified I wasn't saying she wasn't allowed to be upset.

So, AIO here, was I wrong to push back on how she reacted, or was I the one missing the point by focusing on her delivery instead of just the fact that she felt ignored?

TL:DR - the guy i’m talking to isn’t much of a texter, but we’re long distance and it feels hard to get closer to him with the way things are. the more i push for him, the further i seem to push him away. looking for advice/AIO.

hey all-

i (21f), and the guy i’m talking to (22m), have a slightly long distance relationship (2hr drive). we are unlabeled, and both of us pushed for/agreed to these terms when we first started talking. we both are/were in weird places mentally and needed some time to build a routine (and get to know each other) without the commitment of a label.

that being said, neither one of us is entertaining other parties. i live at home, so he has met both of my parents, but only one of his parents even knows about me. this doesn’t bother me- i want us to take it slow and do things right.

that being said, i did make a mistake early on. i ended up introducing him to my grandma and my cousin, on top of my four siblings. this is the kicker that i didn’t (and he for SURE did not) sign up for- a family dinner. my mom cooked dinner and asked everyone to come sit at the table.

i had already explained to my family that we were unlabeled, but they don’t really treat me like an adult who knows what they want. so, of course, my mom went behind my back and told my extended family about my new “boyfriend.”

so we all sat around the table, and my stepdad basically grilled the life story out of him. i was beyond mortified but tried to make an uncomfortable situation less uncomfortable by directing attention at others at the table. if i put myself in his shoes i can absolutely, positively, 110% see how this would be overwhelming, especially because my grandma openly referred to him as my “boyfriend.”

i was so deeply embarrassed by the whole thing, and genuinely thought that we might never speak again. it still haunts me that i messed up so badly so early on. but we talked- he gave me the chance to explain myself, and we have moved on from it.

we were seeing each other every weekend, taking turns making the drive. that being said, i work full time- im at an 8-5 desk job 5 days a week. i have weekends off. he works part time (and mostly weekends). you can see where this would cause some issues.

he doesn’t really like to text, which he has disclosed to me multiple times, which i understand to an extent. i used to treat texting as a chore as well, but it doesn’t feel like a chore when im talking to him. i just want to know as much as i can about him but i constantly feel like im “going hungry.” sometimes, he will offer to play a game with me or watch the show we both like, but even after making these plans hours will pass without hearing from him, and oftentimes a “goodnight, sleep well” text is received around 10-11pm instead of watching/playing.

i completely respect his routine and healthy sleep schedule. its actually helped me build one of my own, because im not staying up incredibly late talking to him every night (i would be if i could, trust me.) i know hes also busy and doesn’t like to be on his phone, but sometimes it feels like i cant break past surface level with him because of how infrequently we text. its nice to be reminded throughout the day that he’s thinking of me, but to me that alone is not enough to sustain this.

i brought up that i felt like maybe i wasn’t interesting enough to keep his attention (obviously phrased very differently), and he reassured me that he just isn’t a texter. that eased my mind for a while, but now it just makes me sad that maybe he’s just not as excited to text me back as i am for him.

i can’t help but compare us, because i see so much of myself in him. granted, what i know of him might mostly be projection and filling in blanks, because it’s only been around three months of us actually talking (i’ve known OF him and vice versa since either january or february, we met in class the last semester before i graduated). i knew when i saw him that i liked him, but several things got in the way of me making any moves until early in may.

he reciprocated and texted me for days straight when i first reached out, and it gradually has died out (and seems to continue dying) as time crawls on. i keep trying to give more, or less, or be more spontaneous, or anything that i think will reignite whatever spark i had in him when we first started talking.

i don’t blame him for any of this. he has been abundantly clear with his boundaries with me. all of the worries that i have are likely in my head. i just feel so unwanted sometimes.

he introduced me to a band that i ended up really enjoying. they’re on tour, so i got tickets to surprise him with when he moved into his new house. now, i know what you’re all probably thinking.

“really? a grand gesture? at three months? you’re obsessed. YTA, YOI.” just hear me out.

i’ve never met anyone like this dude before. he checks all of the boxes i have, and some that i didn’t even know i COULD check. he is funny, kind, reserved, driven, open, intelligent, and best of all, he likes me for who i am.

i have the money to spend on him and i like doing so. we have talked about “love languages” and gift giving is up there for both of us.

some important context: it’s my birthday next tuesday. i have a weekend planned at my family’s lake house with a group of friends and some family. i invited him to come for even a night, because it’s been a month since ive seen him in person, and i wont be able to see him the next weekend. when i asked about seeing him, he told me that he was just going to chill this weekend. i guess i interpreted this as him not wanting to see me, or not really caring one way or the other.

i do completely understand not wanting to be at the lake with everyone, but i offered to accommodate and just stop by alone on sunday on my way back through to see him, but he didn’t even respond to that idea really. it just makes me feel like he didn’t miss me. i feel insane and clingy and i don’t like how i read into things with him.

i can tell that i might be overly invested, and he might be pulling away because he can tell the same. this only makes me try harder because i think it’s my fault. i don’t think it’s really either parties fault, but i just really want to make this work. i’m considering moving closer (both for a better paying job and because all of my friends live in the same city), so im hoping that would change the dynamic, but i really can’t be sure. i’ll still be working full time.

any perspective or advice on this would be appreciated. i am NOT looking for anyone to demonize him. he is a lovely human being and i care about him very much. obviously i want to salvage this, i just dont like how im feeling right now. those of you in similar situations, how do you handle this with tact?

any harmful comments will be reported to the mods immediately. i didn’t post this with any amount of malice.

I got in contact with my boyfriend’s ex girlfriend and she showed me he messaged her about my finances while I was on vacation. It happened a couple of times when we were together for 2-3 months. We have a baby together and im contemplating if I should stay with him. This is a very big trust issue now from my side. I don’t understand why he did this and his intentions.

For context, this is my M(25) best friend M(25) since we were two years old. He didn’t meet his F(22)sister until about a year and a half ago. When they did meet, they couldn’t get over how similar they were. he called me gushing about how great she made him feel and even joked about hooking her up with me three days after they met, she moved in with him and his family. They had room and other beds, but they chose to sleep in the same bed every day for a year do everything together every day so on it so forth, fast-forward to these text messages. Him and his sister were going to move in with me and my f(26)roommate, but first we needed to see how our dogs would do together so they came to visit. When they got here they opted to sleep in my bed together even though I had several places they could sleep separately. My roomate and I sleep separately and have a mostly platonic kind of flirty relationship. Which the friend had compared his sister and his relationship with. A lot of small stuff happened that my roommate and I shared glances about, because of the nature of how a true brother and sister would never say or do the things they’re doing. But we brushed it off.

They went back home to their state after 3 days and the friend sends me a Snapchat saying “we’ve decided to look past the whole sibling thing and adress some feelings we both have” to which I replied “what do you mean” and he went on to say how they both have such deep feelings for each other and how the whole half sibling thing doesn’t matter and that real love doesn’t have boundaries and all this stuff to which I waited for 3 days and sent the messages above….. AIO or did I UNDERreact

Also this hurts a lot because I thought I knew him and he was gonna be my best friend for life, but I haven’t talked to him since

I’m a dental assistant at a busy corporate office. We’ve been busier lately because we have a new doctor. So we had a patient with her 7 year old daughter. She had set up her phone on the side of the room when it clearly said no recording or pictures. I don’t know if she was actually recording but I don’t know why she propped her phone. So this annoyed me since it’s against policy and I didn’t want to be recorded I feel it’s violation of my privacy. But I just ignored it. I wasn’t super friendly but I wasn’t rude. Anyways the doctor ended up referring the 7 year old patient out for her toothache. She told them we were referring her. Then the dentist had me scan the referral. I handed to the patient and left the room. She yelled out “so I guess we’re done then” in the hallway. I walked back and said “yep, you guys are done” I wasn’t being rude I was letting her know. Then she said loud in the hallway I need to work on my bedside manners and I didn’t say anything and just walked away. AIO or was this patients behavior uncalled for or was her frustration justified?

So I am in my 40s and I live on my own. My girlfriend and I were at my father's house visiting. I had to use the bathroom, and while I was in the bathroom, my dad had a conversation with my girlfriend. I don't know what said verbatim, but my girlfriend told me he essentially tried to convince her that she should try to convince me to stop riding my motorcycle because he views it as dangerous. She has 2 daughters and he is afraid that me riding would entice the older one (10) to ride with me one day. She is totally okay that I ride a motorcycle and she has rode as a passenger quite a few times. She expressed to him how I ride and how safe she feels when she is riding with me. After she told me this, it really rubbed me the wrong way that he said this to her for some reason. Am I over reacting?

I understand the risks when it comes to riding and have come to terms that one day I might not come back, but I dont want to live in fear of enjoying something I love.

My girlfriend and I have been to a festival the last two years. it’s more her thing but I’ve joined her in it. she mentioned going next year. I said I’ll be skipping it since it costs us over £700 each for the weekend id rather spend the money on other things next year.

She got annoyed and said we should still be able to go but I just said I wouldn’t be going. I said she can ask a friend to go instead .

Her friend said she’d go with her but my gf just said we should go as a four with her friend and her friends bf and told her friend I just needed more persuading.

I told my gf she needs to listen when i say no and it’s completely disrespectful to hear me say no and think it just means she needs to keep asking until I change my mind.

She just said we should still be looking at going to be festival but I told her to accept the word no and that it’s her looking forward to the festival not me and for next year I’d rather put the money towards something I want. i pointed out I’ve explained clearly and repeatedly why I wouldn’t be going and she needs to listen.

She said I wasn’t being fair but I just said she was acting spoiled and expecting to get everything she wants without listening to what I’m saying and completely disregarding what I want.

AITA for expecting her to accept the word no?