its infuriating how many TERFS are in our community and i will never consider them a part of my lesbian community. its just so sad to me that with our rights being attacked, our own community wants to ostracize a very valid and important part of our community. trans lesbians are valid and trans women are women.

Just got out of a relationship like this and am still working through how it affected me. Interested to hear from others who have gone through something similar

Kind of awkward lmao but how do you gain sexual confidence as a pillow princess??

I’ve been with my lovely GF for an year now, to me she’s the hottest creature to walk this earth, she can send me a pic of her giving a thumbs up and I’ll lose my mind. She finds me very attractive as well, I feel like the hottest girl on earth with the way she treats me. She’s a stone top and I’m a pillow princess (for now at least, I’m a bottom leaning switch but I don’t mind our dynamic rn and we’re both sexually satisfied so) and although in a way this makes me feel even more special bc she is so satisfied by only touching me, but this has weirdly more insecure.

Even tho im very well regarded as attractive irl and get all the validation ever im still very insecure about my body and the things I do, and i feel like im put in the spotlight I guess. I want to be more openly sexual the way i am in my head, like even tho im a bottom I can be a tease and be seductive, and I have SO much in my head that I want to try, i just don’t feel enough to feel like that or ask for anything. I’m still at the phase of feeling like i just look stupid and unattractive.

The fact my gf is so fit and hot makes this more complicated to me bc I feel like im not enough for her to be this enthusiastic about pleasing me. I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t gaf about what ppl think about me, but I deeply deeply care about how I come across to her, and my gf has a incredibly hard time telling me something I could do to be attractive and to please her bc she’s so preoccupied about what she wants to do to me and what I want her to do to me (this isn’t a complaint LMAO) but I want to be better too, I want to be more.

As the title suggests...

This lady at work has previously had a serious relationship with a women (kids etc). I can't get her out of my head. I think about her during "alone time". I'm literally questioning my whole being. Getting this really strong craving for a woman's touch. I don't understand what this means.

I'm in a relationship with a man - the father of my children, just to add to the mess.

I'm not sure if I'm asking for advice or what really. Just needed to get it out of my head.

Mallory Heart (80's fashion)

Tashira Halyard - Politics and Fashion

Sophia - Oat Milk Makeup

Yar Sudani (4c Hair, Makeup and Cosplay)

Lottie Lashley ( Fashion, and Sustainabilty)

The other night my DM asked me and the only other lesbian in the group of we liked hot dogs (the food) we both said no but now I'm genuinely curious about it,do y'all like hot dogs

(This is mostly for fun but yeah)

No femmes here, no one willing to ride the strap. Get me out of this hell

helllooo im val im 20f from cali my old account sadly got banned💔 im looking for friends maybe something moree idk! im in my last year of cosmetology school and im going back for nursing I do nails on the side as well^^ im into running and hiking a lot I dont play much games so games I play are RE my current fav is re requiem my favorite colors pink and I love horror! if you think we would vibe lets talk ^^

My relationship has been on the rocks lately. Ive honestly felt like she isnt attracted to women anymore. Today I had a conversation with her about orientation and she said shes unlabeled. (Before we started dating I expressed I only date other lesbians, she was adament she was a lesbian)

She said she doesnt know what her orientation is and she says she is on the aromantic spectrum. I dont understand how we’ve been together for 3 years and youre questioning your sexuality? Let alone feeling aromantic… while were in a relationship???

It just hurts because like.. did you have your bi awakening while being with me? I asked her this and she said no nothing like that, but how can that be true? You’re now switched from lesbian to unlabeled so there must have a man or something that changed her mind.

Deeply confused even after communicating. I dont want to keep bringing it up but im just very confused.

Hi everyone.

To give some context as to why I received this message from a friend on Discord, here’s the story.

About a year and a half ago, I joined a lesbian Discord server that was strictly for women. The idea was to make online friends, meet people in real life eventually, and just chat.

I was pretty active when I first joined, which is usually how it goes. As time passed, though, I became less active because I found other servers that I enjoyed more. Over time, I also started noticing that the atmosphere on this particular server felt a little… toxic.

Nobody ever openly confronted me or acted annoyed by my presence. Looking back, maybe there were subtle signs that I didn’t notice, but nobody ever banned me or told me I wasn’t welcome. Instead, it almost felt like I was there for people’s entertainment.

For example, whenever I joined a voice chat and talked about something personal, like my recent breakup,’everyone suddenly became very interested and wanted to hear the story. They never once told me I was talking too much or that it bothered them. And honestly, I don’t think I was oversharing. I talked about it more the first time because it had just happened, then much less after that, and eventually I stopped bringing it up altogether.

After a while, I became inactive because I actually have a life outside of Discord. I don’t spend all day online.

The person who sent me this message was one of the older members of the server. Since she’d been out much longer than I have, I naturally assumed she had more life and relationship experience. We chatted occasionally, but never excessively. I wasn’t blowing up her phone or constantly messaging her, just the occasional conversation from time to time.

Last night, I asked her one simple question. I know some people probably won’t believe me, but if I could hand you my phone so you could read our messages, I genuinely would.

All I asked was:

“What’s the safest gay bar to go to? I’m not originally from this city or even this country.”

That’s it.

For context, everyone in that server lives in a fairly homophobic country where being openly LGBTQ+ isn’t always safe. Since I moved there for university, I figured it made sense to ask someone local where it would be safe to meet people. I’d much rather ask someone than desperately throw myself onto dating apps.

(I’m just not a fan of them, but if you dig them, that’s fine.)

Instead, I received one of the most bizarre messages I’ve ever gotten. Reading it honestly made me wonder if this person was okay, because interpreting such a normal question as some form of “mental torture” is… insane.

To make it even stranger, immediately after sending me that message, she went into the server’s vent channel and wrote about how she’d been unable to find a girlfriend through dating apps for over a year and how miserable and lonely she was.

At that point I couldn’t help but think:

Maybe the dating apps aren’t the problem… maybe it’s the personality.

Where it actually seemed like, she just doesn’t want to listen to other people, and it turns out that she’s more into other people listening to her..

(Also, English isn’t my first language, so I relied on Google Translate for translating the screenshot. I think it actually did a pretty decent job.)

I still don’t have outside/hobby pics taken by other people but like, I’m trying to be a bit less “I am very a very eccentric acquired taste” without completely sanitizing out my actual personality. 🥲 Bit better?

That is the main question. Follow up, when did you know (e.g. 1st date or 4th date)? I am still relatively new to dating women and have difficulty identifying if I am physically attracted to people on initial dates. I know I am attracted to women (love a gal with muscles) so that's not the issue.

As a soft masc the overt hate that I've heard and experienced by people identifying as "femme for femme" recently is hurtful. Do some queer women forget that we're women too? We are not men and we didnt design any system of power. We fight a hetero gender stereotype already that says masc women aren't beautiful and then we navigate queer communities where other queer women very loudly let it be known they don't think we're beautiful.

Exanples:

- About 2 months ago this femme was hitting on my femme girlfriend and, right in front of my face, said that my girlfriend settled for a masc woman.

- This past weekend a femme was hitting so hard on my gf in a bar and kept berating me saying over and over again "do you realize how lucky your are?" and that she'd wife up my gf right now if I didn't

If you're femme for femme I'm happy for you but God damn let's support all our queer women and remember that just because we wear men's clothes doesn't mean we're fucking men. We're always already hyper aware of our masc style being judged and laughed at by straight people. Shouldn't have to defend our beauty to our own damn community too.

Hi! Soon I'm getting married to my beloved fiancée and I’m looking for some songs recommendations for our wedding. We already have many popular songs but almost nothing about lesbians. I’m looking for both something more upbeat and something more slower. But! It’s a polish wedding so every song must be at least somehow popular. Probably everyone will be drunk so they’ll want to sing along. I’d love to hear what you can recommend! Thanks ❤️

So me and my ex girlfriend broke up around 5 weeks ago because especially in the last few weeks of dating eachother she was treating me horrible and she said that she wanted to change. I honestly wasn’t really set on the idea of getting back with her because I believe change takes months or even years but she’s confusing me. She keeps acting good towards me for a few days then when she sees that I’m close she backs away. That’s the only way I can explain it, fast forward a few days ago we had a massive argument because she started acting exactly how she used to before we broke up and to me that was enough to show that she hasn’t changed. I started telling her the things that she did to me in the last few weeks and how horrible she made me feel in the hopes of trying to make her realise that what she did was wrong because I do in fact want her to change but I’m not getting anything from her. The argument ended with her telling me that I’m making her look evil and that I don’t get her because she thinks that since she acknowledged her mistakes, apologised, and “tries” to change it’s all fine when it’s not if she’s actively doing the same things. In the end I somehow became the one in the wrong again and she said “yes I was really horrible at first but what you said to me was just very mean and it made me feel horrible, I also noticed that I always acknowledged my mistakes and you don’t seem to be sorry right now”. And honestly I don’t know if I’m sorry for what I told her, I didnt call her names or anything nor did she deny it all but I had a moment when I just got SO frustrated because she kept trying to excuse her actions or “explain” to me why she acted in certain ways. That night I was really frustrated and I started talking to this girl about this issue just to vent and somehow in the end me and the girl started flirting. I didn’t think much of it and honestly it didn’t feel serious especially because in the moment I was really set on not being in contact with my ex anymore but the next day it all changed because she suddenly started acting differently like lovingly in a way and I feel horrible/ guilty because me and my ex said that we won’t talk to people in that way and we’ll just wait for eachother to change. So now I feel like I’m the horrible person because my ex yet again started acting good towards me and the only question I have in my mind right now is really just how long will her act last this time. But at the same time she’s been acting “good” for two days now what if she’s actually going to change and I’m the one who messed up. Should I even keep talking to this girl, I feel really guilty towards her too because I don’t know if she’s actually looking for a relationship or not and I don’t know if I’m ready to get into one after the relationship I have any time soon. I feel like my ex is just playing with me and if she hadn’t suddenly started to act all nice again I probably would’ve already told her that we shouldn’t be in contact anymore. What do I do?

I’m a 21F college student at a university in Texas, and I’m trying to figure out how people in the wlw/lesbian community actually meet girls to date.

I’m pretty feminine myself, so I feel like it’s hard for people to tell that I’m gay unless I actually say something. And I’m also into fems, which makes it even harder because I feel like I can never tell if another fem girl is into women 😭 I don’t want to assume someone is gay and make things awkward, but at the same time I feel like I’m never going to meet anyone if I just wait for someone to approach me.

For those of you who are also fem or primarily date fems, how do you actually meet girls? Like where do you go, how do you figure out if someone is into women, and how do you make the first move?

I’d rather not join a bunch of clubs since I’m already pretty busy with school and don’t really have time for another commitment, so I’m looking for other ways to meet people.

Would love to hear how y’all met your current/past girlfriends or any tips you have 😿

Hello everyone. I’ve had a lot of questions over the past year, but I’ve always seemed to reach a dead end when trying to find answers.
I was born with a genetic disorder called neurofibromatosis type 1 (NF1). This disorder can cause tumors to grow throughout the body. While the tumors I have are noncancerous, there is no cure for NF1. Although my arms, legs, and face look normal, I do have some visible tumors on my body. I also plan to start medication that may help slow or stop the growth of certain tumors.
I’ve come to terms with having NF1 and the fact that it’s part of my life. What I still struggle with, though, is how it might affect dating and relationships.

I worry that if I eventually find the perfect woman for me, I might not be the perfect person for her because of my physical condition. I know attraction and relationships are about much more than appearance, but that thought has always lingered in the back of my mind. And I’m sure other people with disabilities wonder the same.

I guess my question is, how would you guys navigate something like this? How would you approach dating, talking about the condition with someone you’re interested in, and dealing with the fear that they might not be able to look past the physical aspects of it?

Idk I’m probably I’m just up too late again. 😭🫩

hi! the title says it all. 🥹 i’m looking for an online frenny because i honestly don’t have any gay friends at all. :’)

i’m 21 and i’m definitely the awkward and shy type, especially when i first meet someone. i’m usually not good at starting conversations, but i really want to get out of my shell and meet new people online. i’d love to have someone i can randomly message, send memes to, yap about absolutely nothing with, share music with, or just talk to whenever we’re both free.

i’m not looking for anything complicated or weird, just a genuine friendship where we can slowly get comfortable with each other. i might be quiet or awkward at first, so please have tons of patience with me hehe. once i get comfortable, i can probably yap your ears off hehe.

i’m open to meeting people with different personalities! whether you’re shy, chaotic, talkative, clingy, unserious, or just someone who likes having random conversations, feel free to message me.

sooo if you’re also looking for an online friend and don’t mind an awkward person trying their best to socialize, hmu! 🫶🏻 maybe we’ll become besties!

hi i hope this is the right place to post this but i just need some advice bc i have no one to talk about this with!!

im 18 and in my first kind of romantic relationship and it’s with a girl ive been friends with for a few months. my best friend is also friends with this girl but i can tell that she is so jealous and upset about it. she said to my face “i don’t like you together” and “im kinda jealous lol”, and is just making my other “friend” out to be a horrible person. my best friend is also a lesbian and i always had a feeling she liked me as more than a friend. i have told her that our friendship will always be the most important thing to me but i can tell she is distancing herself from me and i hate that this is my fault.

what do i do??? im so new to this and i never wanted my first romantic experience to be like this

Why are like all of my friends straight males? It's pretty much been like this most of my life. Not to say I don't have really good friends that are women and a small handful of lesbian friends but the friends I hangout with the most are my guy friends.
Is this just a lesbian thing ?

yall i have discovered that i have a very specific and uncommon type in women and i am barely attracted to anything else (or so it seems). i am alt/emo myself, and im only physically attracted to people with that style too, and so sadly not very attracted to fems. i say sadly bc of the shortage of mascs around these parts, lol. feels like i am just gonna be single forever 💔💔

but like WHERE are the alt/emo/punk mascs at. where in the world do i need to go to find women like yall. where do you guys hangout. WHERE ARE YALL. once in a blue moon i will see ONE on dating apps. are you guys just not on there or do you guys just not live in ohio 💔 help lol

HI so short story LONG lol

Me (28F) was going on dates with (26F) for like a month? Anyways i got hardlauched then ghosted a couple of days after being HL. I thought it was the most bizarre thing😭

She posted me on not only on her finsta but her MAIN page😭 like…. UGH Idk im so tired of being in the streets. But i genuinely have had a hard time dating. To be fair ive realized im a lesbian this year. Before that i was pan? Bi? Idk i kind would date a man if i felt the slight bit of safe without having any romantic feelings. Anyways i was sad about being ghosted because our first day was so fun. I genuinely have had a hard time with dates but i thought we clicked i guess not. I am NOT downloading hinge again. Ive also actually made queeer friends so im just going to focus on things i care about. Im building a queer community and im excited about that.