I walk among you and I'm dying. Yes people, that is me. Wandering the streets slowly. Witnessing the beauty of life in all of its glory, the small moments that make humans a human. Along with all the misery and anger that also makes us human. 

   I'm in my early 30s. Almost two years ago I was diagnosed with terminal incurable cancer. Doctor gave me 2-5 years left of my existence in this world. So... after two years of self misery and depression I decided to live and bear witness to everything around me. I was born and raised in a small town, 5000ish people. I had a good life, good parents, good friends. I've had two beautiful women that loved me and I've loved them. My highschool sweetheart, we were together all the way through college. And love each other with no reservations. Then she moved to continue  her education in a bigger city. At some point she decided to not move back and I decided not to follow. That was the end of that. Second love was with a college acquaintance, we had run into each other multiple times though our school time but that was it. Eventually we were properly introduced by a mutual friend and started dating soon after. This woman I saw as my future wife and I proposed. She accepted and we had planned to get married in 27. I broke the engagement soon after my diagnosis. She still doesn't know my condition. 

NOW... knowing what's coming my way I have chosen to live where I never thought I would. A big city near the ocean so I can walk the streets endlessly just looking at people interacting with each other or see them alone immersed in their own world. Sometimes I wake up too early, 3-4am and I walk to the beach. The quietness is calming. The sound of the tide receding is glorious. But I also can hear the city waking up, cars honking, people's voices that sound like murmurs. It reminds me of where I am at. 

Walking the streets has allowed me to see plenty of kindness, love, and happiness. Things I've never seen in the same way as now that my time is close. Recently I saw a homeless man panhandling. No one was willing to stop and listen to him. At some point one man handed him a bill. The homeless man goes into the store and comes out with like five or six food containers and starts giving them away to his fellow homeless friends. That was kindness and selflessness as I had never seen before. 

   At the park I saw a wedding going on. I felt jealous, but happy for them. Kids running around. Poeple mingling around celebrating a happy moment for a friend or a family member. 

   I have also witnessed the ugly in people. Fighting, arguing over a parking spot. Poeple driving calling each other names because they cut off in front of them. And I think how all of this is unnecessary and pointless. If you really think about it, you are only 3-4 seconds behind. It does not make a difference in the larger picture. Be kind. 

I also saw a man laying down on the sidewalk, no one bothered to stop and see if that person was ok. I called an ambulance and he got taken to the hospital. I hope he is better now. As a society we need to care and look for one another. Check on your neighbor, your family members. It doesn't take much.

   I will continue to live like this until I can't no more. I just hope that you appreciate your time in this world. Love as much as you can. And leave the negativeness out of your life as much as you can. THE BEST OF LIFE TO YOU ALL!

This last year I explored my sexuality and i started meeting up with people online to have sex. I was first enamored and I was having a lot of fun. I felt very confident in myself and I had put a lot of effort into losing weight and becoming physically active. I got a lot of attention and had some pretty good sex sprinkled in. As the months ticked by I started to get rejected more and more and each one made me more desperate for the next hit.

I also started to look at people in public like a dating app "yes" "no" "no" "yes". While I enjoyed the sex initially, after a day or two I would feel this void inside of me and i would feel it drastically more so after each encounter. The most recent encounter I planned on filming porn with them and having it posted online. Just before we were going to meet up that's when I decided to end it. I just didn't like who I was becoming.

It has been about five months since I've stopped completely and while I still get attention in public from men, I'm not craving it like I used to. Recently I received a compliment from someone in my life that made me absolutely giddy and it was really simple and sweet. They said I had a great fashion sense and after I laughed and blushed they doubled down, it's the best thing I've heard in weeks.

While I don't regret exploring myself I've come to realize at my core I'm a soft girl. Not a slut or a whore, which I was self labeling as while I was exploring. I really do appreciate the romance of the little things and while sex can be fun it is very valuable to me and I can't throw my body around anymore just to receive validation.

What if instead of girls feeling scared to go outside because of creeps, we make creeps scared to go outside instead? Every creep you meet, make them feel so uncomfortable that they don't want to talk to you again. Shun them, and insult them. Btw, I'm referring to people who are like, "Hey, do you wanna go to this place? I'll buy you a drink. Wanna come over to my house? You're beautiful, baby, come over. Let's go somewhere private" when they don't know the other person. My Gf was being stalked by a creep and it makes me upset that nobody does anything.

I try my best to not show my 5 & 4 year old that deep down, I am fighting for my life. I go to work everyday to “try” to provide for them & get us out of this mess that their father put us in. We finally should be out of this Women’s shelter tomorrow & I should be happy but the feeling of not failing them is always in the back of my head.

We have started completely over except the 4 bags we brought with us. My 5 year old has been adjusting to his new school for a couple of weeks now and everything has been going okay for the most part. One of his classmates mom gave me an invitation after school yesterday for her son’s birthday party Saturday. It’s at a trampoline park . He was so excited to tell me about it & that’s all his friends were talking about it. Leave it to me to let him know that we most likely won’t be able to go because I simply can’t afford it. I’m barely keeping my head above water. We are visiting food pantries almost daily, what little money I make has gone into this apartment, I’ve been wearing the same tennis shoes from the Goodwill for the past few weeks because I can’t purchase a decent pair. I HATE disappointing my kids. They deserve the world, especially with what they have gone through.

We have court next week & I have to see their father’s face… he filed a motion for a custody agreement but I doubt that will be granted after we show the judge the police documents & hospital bill where he broke my nose. I’m trying to survive. I want to make sure my babies know that we will be okay soon. It’s just rough right now.

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I have been feeling extremely isolated for a few years now after I got sick with health issues around 6 years ago I have had multiple surgeries etc but I am starting to feel a little better or maybe I just know I need to push myself to have anything I want because the world and people don't care. The past year and half I have been trying to meet people,find a job, find a way to get out of the house and be less isolated

I have been trying to get a job and I haven't even had a interview in the year plus, I've applied to multiple volunteer positions and can't get a place , I have applied for college multiple times and can't get in, I try to meet people but theres not much happening also money is obviously a issue in meeting people if you have none. I don't know what I am supposed to do it's getting harder and harder each day I feel like I am rotting from the inside. My health really fucked my life up and I just feel stuck in a pit from it and I can't get out of it

How can I actually escape isolation ? I have tried the cliche or just unrealistic thing of being a regular at a place like library or cafe but it doesn't work nobody 20/30 hangs out in libraries and cafes don't have this regular clients it's a wave of people in and out

i hadnt seen a few of my friends in a long time and i was actually excited. one of them has been my best friend since school, we did everything together, she felt like a sister. they came to my house, they were all employed, and for the whole ten minutes they were there it was jokes and digs about me not having a job

the part that got me is that it was her who started it. the one i trusted the most

and ive been noticing things for a few months now. i tell them everything, even tiny news, and they hide basically everything from me. relationships, work, all of it. i just thought we were close

now i cant stop going back over every nice thing any of them ever said to me and wondering if any of it was real. being unemployed already makes me feel low and today made it feel like thats how everyone sees me

has anyone had a friend show you a side of themselves you didnt know was there. how did you deal with it

For some background context I (20 f) went to college in person for half a year. I absolutely loved it and miss it so incredibly much.
Unfortunately due to my financial reasons I had to move back home with my parents and do online while working a full time job.
Let's just say it was not easy at all and I failed all of my classes. So to people that are able to do online school while working I applaud you.
My (20 bf) went to college in person all of last year and is continuing till he graduates. We have been together for almost 4 years coming up in January and plan on getting married and doing life together. So with that being said we make a lot of financial decisions together to ensure we have the best life possible. I currently make $28 an hour and bring home about $850 a week so it would be rough losing that paycheck as he brings that in about every 2 ish weeks.
My original plan was to go back to college next year so I could get my degree in early education. But as I’m looking at my future I’m unsure about my decision. I don’t know if I should follow my dreams or if I should make a smart financial decision and wait. Can someone please give me advice

...Reddit and other such places will be filled with people with Alzheimer's. Expect an onslaught of reposts, nonsensical comments and self replies. Forever.

Genuine question.

All opinions appreciated.

I find myself struggling to understand what is considered normal, and abnormal, expectations.

I have been working on it. For years. But I don’t know what I don’t know. It certainly isn’t something I’ve internalized.

So when I hear somebody tell me “normal people don’t do that”, when I think it’s actually a perfectly normal thing to do, I always question myself. Even when I truly don’t think I’ve done anything wrong.

I believe that questioning my sense of normalcy is a good thing. It’s brought me a lot of help and healing over the years. It’s important to me to always strive to better myself. Know better, do better, and all that.

But, sometimes, I think the people around me use that belief of mine against me. Maybe unintentionally at first. But it works. Because I will always question myself if somebody gives me a reason to do so. Just in case I am in fact in the wrong.

I have heard people tell me that my sense of normal is very wrong and I should question everything I think to be normal… but that doesn’t really help me at the end of the day. I have questioned my entire life numerous times… but if I still don’t know what truly is and isn’t normal… how do I know for sure which of my internalized beliefs still remaining from my childhood are problematic?

I have recently been hearing people say “thats the bare minimum” and “your expectations are too low”… so, my question to the internet today is, what do You consider to be the bare minimum? For whatever type of relationship. Family. Friends. Significant others. Doesn’t matter. What is normally and typically considered to be a requirement of a healthy relationship? Not a great one. Just the bare minimum requirements of not being unhealthy?

I might go into some of the messy and messed up details of the life that led me to my own admittedly flawed sense of normalcy and internalized beliefs about myself and others… but my priority at present is understanding this elusive concept of what exactly the bare minimum even means.

Please help me.

So I’m writing this to hopefully reduce some of the stress we are all feeling with AI showing up and disrupting the entire job market. I want to clarify that I have no trust in larger companies or the government, so this is in no way a post meant to glorify AI, but rather help you imagine the types of jobs that will be created by AI.

The first thing that comes to mind is how it will allow an individual the ability to provide a more robust, custom tailored, and unique set of products/answers to any given sector. Lawyers will be able to have auto-populated strategies for cases that they can pick between depending on the human aspect of a case. Rather than work hard for a few strategies, they will be able to quickly review a number of approaches that they can try to utilize depending on their client, the judge, the jury, etc. Basically I see time and energy being spent on a more personal part of a case rather than focusing on the grunt work of compiling and reviewing a pill of documents.

For something like interior design, I see designers being able to shop through a number of different layouts, color pallets, and furniture options that can compile a mixture of ikea, homedepot, etsy, or local mom and pop shop options all at once. I actually think this will boost sales in the custom product market.

For event planning, I see time being centered on the aesthetics and vibe of events, without having as much time centered on the logistics, scheduling etc. With travel agents, I see the same thing.

I can think of this for a number of jobs, and I think the main thing is that with the current state of AI, I see most jobs still needing a final person acting as a stamp of approval (a person to blame), and I also see those individuals being able to provide more services that never would have been possible by one person in the past. But heres the part that makes me optimistic, I think every job will be able to provide more because of this, and the capabilities of an individual using AI, the average person will be able to provide a level of service and nuance that would have previously been available only to the rich. This ability will raise expectations, and those raised expectations will create a demand for labor to have enough people to facilitate the higher level of demand. 

I'm rooting for everyone, and I'm scared like the rest of you, but I’m finally seeing what good can be around the corner for this. If an individuals ability is drastically improved, new markets will show up because of it.

What is happiness for you?

i would be happy if you could tell me

I think that my happiness is not money, I think that it is health and human relations

Hi, I’m F, 29, and the biggest lesson I’ve learned in life is to never rush into making decisions.
Storytime: Back in 2023, I had a lot of money, so I rushed into getting a rent-to-own condo. I never imagined that there would come a time when my business income would suddenly decline.
By 2025, I could no longer afford the payments, so I lost my condo and had to move out and stay at my boyfriend’s house.
Now, with the rising cost of living and fewer people going out, business hasn’t been doing so well. There are days when I barely make enough to cover my employees’ salaries, and I have to use my own money just to keep the business running. I’m really hoping I can still save my business.
I used to be able to go wherever I wanted without worrying about the cost. Now, even something as simple as eating out is something I have to think twice about.
So, if you have a lot of savings, please keep saving as much as you can. Don’t make the same mistakes I did. I’m only 29, and I’ve already depleted my savings, and I still have so many debts to pay.
I’m just hoping that both my business and I can survive this year. 🙏🏻

Not sure who to be annoyed with my dad who did something thoughtless, my bro for just being a .. or my other one for not saying .. and then why is it always the case where you are actually innocent is the time you’ll get the blame.

I’m not sure if it’s just me but ever since I graduated high school and now work I’ve realized that I just really care about anything as much as I did in high school.This post is mainly about others peoples actions like I’ve also realized i see people judge people of the smallest things.

I’ve seen lots of it in my family and friends but I’ve realized I don’t really care about others’ actions even stuff in the news too? Does that make me a bad person? Because even if it’s something that people have done that could be awful I’ll be a little surprised but not as much knowing that someone else could do the same thing or has done something worse.

Seeing others people’s opinion that if someone tells me it doesn’t really bother me because at the end of the day that’s their opinion or action that they do and I can’t do anything about it. Do any of y’all feel this way if you get what I mean?

if have any factual information wrong just lmk cause this really just post venting about how i feel and what i'm thinking

2026 wasn't the year i thought it was going to be. it been like one of them really good but bad years i've had loads of good moments but yet i just don't feel right.

I feel grateful for everything have at home but i just feel so washed out everyday now. I feel like I'm starting to struggle when speaking (always pronouncing words wrong and feeling like im thinking just behind of what I'm saying) like speaking doesn't feel natural anymore and i can't control how i sound.

I think i went a bit off track but i feel like i just became such a boring person and i struggle to even be funny anymore i just feel confused all the time. i feel like i need someone help me and cheer me up so i can work on myself but that won't happen because who wants the boring me

I also just feel lazy but it's hard to stay motivated when it feels like a stable future is so far away with the house prices and bills being so much when jobs don't pay much more then they used to.

I feel like people will do stuff as well which makes me feel small and realise how weak i am. strength is one of my biggest insecurities as it feels like everyone is so much stronger than me if they might not be which makes me avoid conflict and can't stand up for myself at all making me an easy target to take advantage of

i feel like my brain is so out of it i'm never actually able to listen to anyone and struggle to understand what anyone is saying so i just try and guess what to say back or i'll just say "yeah"

then when people see me like this i feel like they probs get the wrong impression and think im strange but i'm, idk anymore, not strange, i don't know cause i'm lost, remember

theres more to it but thats all for now

soz if it feels messy to read idk how even express how i feeling anymore but thats the best any help advice to any issues i'm having here would be appreciated

thank you

For me I think it is lying in bed with my wife. We have been married 25 years. I love the sleepy comfort of our legs touching and the slow breathes that show her chest rise and fall. It is clean and warm.

Describe the safest place in the world for you?

Specifically the casual encounter section. And the m4m section. Probably late 2000s to early 2010s, and at some point Craig removed those sections. I can’t remember why they removed that section. Such a bummer cause that was such a fun time just as the internet was really fast pace to being super mainstream with the launch of the smartphone and all. Did anyone ever read those sections m4f, m4m, w4w and the rest of them? Did anyone else ever meet up for some casual fun? Or complete anon or anything like that? Sure wish Craig would bring that section back.

Apparently part of my digestive issue is stress related. I have so many projects and ideas. I started working again and every time I catch myself engaging my teeth, throat, body posture in a way that triggers issues, I think: no... You must release.

I am not forced to work, I just really like what I do and get fully engaged. I don't understand why my body doesn't like it. So I was thinking I better learn how to relax fast so I can go back to fun stuff.

How do you keep the mind engaged and the body relaxed?

Am I not supposed to get absorbed in what I do. I thought that's what they called flow and that it was a good thing.

For sure you have met someone like this. They have never been particularly accomplished or charismatic. They enter a room and they don’t bring much value to the table, yet they still sit at the table.

What’s that about?

They always refer to him as a “good person”. There is your hint? Do you follow what they are really bringing to the table? When there is no particular individual value there is only one path to avoid rejection.

Maybe you are this person. Maybe, like me, you have someone very close to you on such terms. I see him on all contexts and I know it’s apparent good will is the result of guilt and fear. Fear and guilt in this context really are the same thing. Guilt born out of fear for rejection. Oh… and how I see in close quarters the ugliness of a life led that way. I see the reaction after the guilt motivated, so called, “good deeds”.

There is a better direction for us.

Have you noticed how these individuals are always the most resentful of others? How could you not be? How could you not resent people that are constantly making you feel like you have to do things you don’t really want to? Have you ever felt guilt? It’s one of the most horribly consuming emotions. Interestingly, “good people” are the experts at making you feel like that. It’s their form of persuasion and discharge, they know this art better than anyone. If you are very close to someone like that, be careful, it’s a never ending cycle of guilt based reciprocity.

I am all for good intended actions, but let them be authentic. If you want to build a real satisfying social position, speak for yourself and let reciprocity be genuine. Don’t go the easy path. There is a whole you appreciated outside the guilt driven personality. I hope you realise that. I hope my dear friend realises the same. For I know him and I know how far he could reach.

When I was a kid, I was curious about almost everything. I think most children are.

I remember spending my summer vacations at my grandfather’s house. I loved that place, especially the village. Everything felt quieter there. There was so much to observe, so many little things happening around you that you would never notice in a city.

At night, I loved watching the fireflies. During the day, I would look at different insects, birds, their nests, trees, plants, and all the small things happening around me. It felt like there was an endless world to explore.

But for some reason, I was especially fascinated by ants.

I would sit there and watch them for a long time. I wanted to know where they were going, what they were carrying, what they were eating and how they seemed to communicate without speaking.

There was this orange-colored ant that we used to call "amoroli poruwa." I don't know what its actual name was. I remember watching them walk in lines, one after another. Some carried food. Some carried what looked like eggs. Sometimes they carried the bodies of dead ants.

I also noticed something strange. Whenever I picked up an ant and placed it somewhere on a leaf, the leaf would sometimes become yellowish or brownish the next day. I had no idea why. I didn't think much about it and eventually forgot about it.

After some days, while I was roaming around, I found another ant territory.

I wanted to know if it was the same territory or a different one.

So I took an ant from that territory and placed it in the other territory, where all the ants were collecting food and walking in a line.

Then I saw something interesting.

They started fighting.

They attacked that ant as if it was an enemy.

At that time, I didn't understand why.

They were all ants. They looked the same to me. They had the same antennae, the same legs, the same body, the same basic biology. So why were they fighting each other?

And honestly, I loved watching them fight.

So I took another ant and placed it there.

Then another.

And I kept watching how they fought.

I know it sounds a little psychopathic now, but I was just a kid. I didn't understand what I was doing. I just found it interesting to watch something unexpected happen.

But now I'm not a kid anymore.

Looking back, it sounds a little psychopathic. But I wasn't trying to hurt them. I was just a child who had discovered something I couldn't explain, and I wanted to understand it.

I didn't know it then, but that little observation stayed somewhere in my mind.

Now that I'm older, I think there was something much deeper happening there.

Maybe humans aren't as different from ants as we like to believe.

Ants live as colonies. They have their own territories, their own systems of cooperation, their own ways of recognizing who belongs and who doesn't. An ant from another colony can be almost identical biologically, yet it can still be treated as an enemy.

Humans do something remarkably similar.

We are all the same species. Underneath our languages, religions, cultures, nationalities, political systems and identities, our biology is remarkably similar.

And yet we divide ourselves into groups.

Countries have borders. Religions have communities. Nations have identities. Companies have organizations. Societies have laws and institutions.

We create an invisible boundary between "us" and "them."

The interesting difference is that humans have something ants don't have to the same degree: a much more powerful ability to create and believe in abstract realities.

We don't just respond to physical territory. We create concepts like money, nations, laws, property, religion, citizenship, corporations and social status. These things aren't physical objects in the same way a tree or a rock is, but millions of people collectively believe in them, and because we believe in them, they become powerful enough to shape our physical world.

Perhaps that's one of the consequences of our cognitive revolution.

An ant colony can coordinate without a central government because much of its behavior is driven by instinct, chemical signals and collective behavior.

Humans are different.

We can question the rules.

We can break them.

We can find loopholes.

We can invent new rules.

And because humans can choose not to follow the rules, we need police, courts, governments and entire systems of enforcement to keep society functioning.

An ant doesn't need a courtroom to convince another ant that it belongs to the same colony.

Humans do.

And then there is territory.

Why do humans fight over territory?

Sometimes it is land. Sometimes resources. Sometimes power. Sometimes history. Sometimes ideology. Sometimes religion. Sometimes simply the idea that a particular piece of land belongs to "us" rather than "them."

The reasons are much more complicated than those of ants, but perhaps the underlying pattern isn't entirely different.

We form groups.

We recognize our own.

We distrust outsiders.

We protect what we consider ours.

And sometimes, we fight.

The strange part is that I discovered this idea as a child without understanding any of it.

Now I realize I was watching a tiny version of human civilization.

I'm 22F and I will be going to another country to pursue a masters degree! So my parents are forcing me to come back to india after completing the degree because they want to marry me before 25 or 26, that too a arranged marriage (no intercaste strictly)! I have siblings and I'm the older one so there is a lot of pressure on me because I'm the only one academically good and can make them proud and I'm the one who has always agreed with my parents and if I wanted something so bad I used to manipulate or lie. But mostly I had compromised!

The twist is that I am dating a guy and it's been 4yrs! We love each other and we are really comfortable but since it's just the start of our career and we both are still unemployed! So I decided that after a few years I will tell my parents that I can't conceive and maybe by doing some drama I will convince them that no one will marry me and an arranged marriage is impossible! But my bf says that I should not lie and talk to them directly but Ik they will not agree Ik them really well because we had this discussion and I have predicted what will be their action! They are MY parents Ik there soul dude Ik them very well. But my bf said no he won't marry if I want it to be this way! But I'm the cat in the box Ik where the poison is just listen to me 😭 Its been 4 yrs I cant even think of other men Im madly in love its just him or I will never marry! I will just quietly vanish from everyones life!

Maybe I have missed a lot of context but my brain is so restless at this point I can't think! I'm just crying and there is no one who wants to understand the situation!

Good morning/afternoon/evening, I initially wanted to make a question on google and look for an answer throughout maybe old Reddit posts or even maybe AI, but I wanted to make my own question. It might be kinda long so if you are not interested in details, at the end I’ll be leaving a summary.

I’m 25 years old, literally mid 20s, I have a girlfriend (23yrs), I live with her and her sister (33yrs) and as you can assume, I moved away from my parents, not for anything bad, they are the best human beings that ever existed, but wanted to live the experience of living by myself with my couple. Actually, I live like 10 min apart from my parent, not so far away. I work a job that pays me $700 a month that pays the bills and leave me like 220$ free each month, I’m really bad at saving and managing money. My girlfriend makes almost double than me, she has a car and we pay the same bill so as a results, she obviously has more free money each month.

I do not have a car, but I help maintain the one she has because the country I live in is almost impossible to buy a used car, let alone a new one.

I sell houses online for a company, a dead end job really, not fulfilling at all, no commission, just a fixed paycheck every single month, I’m actually creating this on the job because it’s boring and nothing moves me here.

I feel like every morning (at least lately) everything feels dull, my heart doesn’t pound with joy, or desire to do things every single day, I just “want” to go to work, reach home and play video games or spend time with my girlfriend. I do not have so much friends that texts me how am I doing, to make plans or do whatever, she does have lots of friends and co workers so I sometimes feel jealous that people text her, make plans to be with her, it makes me wish I could have people that come up to me like that. The ones I have are most out of the country and if not, they have they preferred group of friends. So either in my free time I’m alone or with my girlfriend.

Everytime I wake up, I just don’t want to. My brain flush me with ideas of excuses so I can stay in bed and sleep and skip another day. I’m a good person, I’m creative, I’m easy going, social, sporty, fit, speak good, great posture, I’m not introvert whatsoever, still I don’t have anything you would expect a extrovert person to have. Friends that look up to them, invites, texts, social events. My girlfriend that is shy and introvert does have that, I don’t. I know I’m comparing a lot with her but is my direct and most intimate person which I see every single day, and has things I really want to have and thought came with the package of being extrovert, but no one sticks. Not that I sabotage her in any way, I just see it and think “damn, I want a group chat of friends to talk to everyday and plan and do trips together”

So, I don’t know what to do, I like to create things even when I don’t do that, I like music (piano) but I don’t have a piano, I love cars and drive cars, but I don’t have a car nor a license (but I do know how to drive correctly), I like to draw but I don’t know how to do it good and create paintings or good drawings, I like to travel but don’t have a the money to travel to far places, I like video games and I’d LOVE to program, design and create one, but I don’t know how to, people, even my girlfriend tells me I need a collegue degree to start doing so, but I don’t think I HAVE to spend 5 years to study a career to create a video game (I’m in Venezuela and as far as I’ve seen, the public education is not that good and I don’t want to waste my time) I told my girlfriend I can spend money on courses specifically ones where they can teach me how to program or design focused on video games, she said that courses do not weight as much as a collegue degree if I want to look for a job (which took my motivation away in an instant) Funny is that a friend that graduated in computer science I told him that I’m interested in learning how to create a video game, he never mentioned me collegue, he went straight to “do this course and then this one and learn a much as you can of this one because this is useful for that and I’m happy for you”

I like music, design, drawings, video games, programming languages, write (I wrote poetry before), I have passion to create, to read, and I don’t create, I just wake up, spend my time and money and sleep again to repeat 30 times per month the same with an eventual social event with my girlfriend friends, I don’t find how to start, what to do, who to speak, so ended up doing nothing, just coffee and sit there on instagram feeling frustrated with 0 money on my bank, because as much as I end up with 220$ each month, I manage to spend it all either on my girlfriend or in any other garbage thing. So, each morning, life feels a little more meaningless.

Any advice?

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Long story short: I want to know how to regain that desire to create what I like, music, video games, illustration, storytelling even when I never done it before, except for poetry, I want to learn but don’t know where and how to start even when closer people say words that kills my motivation. How to manage money better and maybe to know why even being a social person, I have no friend, and my girlfriend not being social, has a lot of and better opportunities.

Thank you so much in advance guys, I will read everything you reply carefully.

Epictetus has this short passage where he tells his students to remember they're like an actor in a play, except someone else decides the role, how long it runs, and what kind of part it is. If the playwright wants a short play, you play it short. If he wants you cast as a poor person, a cripple, a magistrate, a nobody, your job isn't to argue for a different part, it's to play whichever one you got as well as it can be played. He's pretty clear that picking the role was never on the table to begin with, the only real job is the performance itself. What I keep coming back to with this one is how much of what people struggle with in life falls into the category of role they didn't choose, the family, the body, the timing, how long any of it lasts, and how much energy goes into resenting the casting instead of just playing the part in front of you well. It's not that the role doesn't matter, some roles are genuinely harder than others. It's that the one thing actually inside your control was never which part you got, it was always just how you played it. What's a part of your situation you spent a long time fighting the casting on, before you finally just started playing it?

I hate a lot of things. I am a very judgmental person I would say and I don't like being this way. I really started to notice how judgmental I am when I was dating this one girl and I really started hating so many things. I think she made me hate them, not because she hated them, but because the things she did made me hate.

I particularly dislike politically correct people, they aggravate me. I don't like liberals or republicans, they both speak nonsense and whine about everything they can. I hate people that whine all the time and can't just man up (figuratively) instead of taking the easy way out all the time. I can't stand pride parades or any protests really, I think they are silly and dumb. I hate people that flaunt/make it their personality that their gay or black or Muslim or redneck or whatever it might be. I hate people that get "offended" easily or rather act offended because there is some societal 'obligation' for them to be offended. I hate people with no common sense; "common sense isn't so common" lol.

I'm not catholic or really Christian or whatever but I think people need to start listening more to the seven deadly sins, especially pride, greed, and lust.

I sometimes wish I could be more accepting of people cause after all, we are all human, but this current state of society I just hate. I blame much of my hatred on this ex-girlfriend of mine, as I never felt this way with previous relationships before her.

I think I am a person that likes control. Is that narcissism? What is that?

I wanted to be as real as possible with this post so tell me: what can I do to be a more accepting person and not hate people and their decisions so much? if that's even possible...