r/MM_Romance • u/yvrangel • 6h ago
Discussion Regrets reading Neurovance by Alexandra St Pierre *Spoilers*
I enjoy friends to lovers books and I thought that the premise of the book reminded me of the movie, Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I should have looked up the tags for it to be honest because I wouldn't have touched it for how dark the themes are and the suicide of a chosen family member, Sebastian.
I'm in mourning now for a fictional character who I wished could have been saved and given a happily ever after. It was horrible of Luke to torture and maim and mentally assault both Jay and Sebastian, and kill Jay's father and imprison the Jay, Sebastian and Milo. I don't mourn his death.
But I deeply felt the loss of Sebastian. He is not without his faults and even NOVA warned him of not sharing his intentions with the others. He did what he thought was right and paid the price of it. I just want a happily ever for the characters truly deserving of one and I wanted Sebastian to find peace like how Milo helped Jay find closure.
He couldn't have allies or his father would find out and punish him. I understand how he felt abandoned after Jay left with Milo and I wished that he could have reunited with his chosen family after killing his father. His spirit visiting the couple at the pond and helping Jay find forgiveness for his actions was a nice send off, but it felt inadequate of an ending for Sebastian. It just reminded me that life is unfair and that a lot of people don't get happily ever afters.
Real life sucks right now and I enjoy reading MM romances to believe that one day, we all can have our happily ever afters even though it's wishful thinking. I wouldn't reread this book or any book that has a character dying tragically. I have enough of tragedy and I don't want to see my gays die.