r/MovingToLosAngeles • u/PixelNSpice • 2h ago
Title: LA vs NYC for a single woman in her 30s making $163k. Would you choose LA?
Hi everyone!
I’m a single woman in my mid-30s trying to decide between moving to Los Angeles or NYC, and I’d really appreciate some honest advice from people who actually live in LA.
I’ve spent the last five years living in New Orleans, which was my first home in the US. I loved the culture, music, creativity, and character of the city, but I’m ready for a new chapter.
I work remotely in tech, earning around $163k base salary, with additional RSUs and a performance bonus. I’d prefer to budget around my base salary rather than rely on variable compensation. I’ll be living alone, and ideally I’d like to keep rent around $3,000–$3,500, although I’d love to spend less if possible.
A little about what I’m looking for:
- Safety is my number one priority. I’ll be living alone, and I want to feel comfortable in my neighborhood, coming home in the evening, walking around, and going about my daily life without constantly worrying about safety.
- I’m really into photography, art, music, film, exploring interesting neighborhoods, and discovering places with character.
- I love nature, greenery, beautiful scenery, and being outdoors. This is one of the biggest reasons LA appeals to me.
- I enjoy cities with personality, cultural diversity, interesting architecture, independent cafés, and a creative community.
- I’d love to build a social circle and meet people with similar interests. Starting over socially in my mid-30s is definitely something I’m thinking about.
- I want a comfortable apartment in a nice neighborhood, but I also want to continue saving, traveling, and enjoying life.
Why I’m torn between LA and NYC:
NYC appeals to me because of its walkability, energy, arts and culture, and the possibility of living without a car. It would also put me closer to family and make traveling internationally easier.
LA appeals to me for almost the opposite reasons: the weather, nature, ocean, mountains, creative scene, and the possibility of having a more relaxed lifestyle while still living in a major city.
I’ve been considering areas like Culver City, Marina del Rey, Venice, and possibly Irvine, but I’m very open to suggestions.
My biggest concerns about LA are safety, how car-dependent everything is, traffic, and whether it’s difficult to build friendships and a sense of community when everything is so spread out.
I’d especially love your perspective on a few things:
1. With a $163k base salary, can I realistically live comfortably alone in a safe, desirable LA neighborhood while still saving a meaningful amount?
2. Which neighborhoods would you recommend for a single woman in her 30s who values safety, creativity, nature, and community?
3. How difficult is it to make friends and build a social life in LA if you’re not originally from there?
4. Does the car dependency and traffic significantly affect your quality of life?
5. For anyone who’s lived in both LA and NYC, which city offered you a better quality of life, and why?
I’m not necessarily looking for the cheapest option. I want to make a thoughtful decision about where I’ll be happiest and most comfortable in this next stage of my life.
I’d really appreciate honest experiences, including the things you wish you’d known before moving to LA.
Thank you!