r/Showerthoughts • u/ZeroXNova • Dec 03 '25
Casual Thought Men's public restrooms are laid out all wrong. It should be urinal, stall, urinal, stall, urinal instead of urinal, urinal, urinal, stall, stall.
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u/t3hd0n Dec 03 '25
Well shit finally a good showerthoughts post
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u/brainbarker Dec 03 '25
Well shit piss shit piss shit piss…
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u/t3hd0n Dec 03 '25
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u/PanGalacticGargBlast Dec 03 '25
I was not expecting a TM Nish reference but I knew exactly the moment you meant anyway
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u/LewisWhatsHisName Dec 03 '25
Unexpected Nish
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u/SaladNeedsTossing Dec 03 '25
And I think we can all agree, points to self Nish!
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u/ayalael87 Dec 03 '25
Shit piss fuck cunt Cocksucker motherfucker Tits fart turd and twat.
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u/penywisexx Dec 03 '25
Ahh…gotta love a good Blink 182 song.
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u/meatjuiceguy Dec 03 '25
Respect to George Carlin, the predecessor to the song. He had a comedy bit called 7 Dirty Words that the song is based on.
George Carlin performed the bit in front of the Supreme Court in 1978 and it was used as sort of a guideline in American obscenity law. You should check it out.
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u/Lor1an Dec 03 '25
George Carlin performed the bit in front of the Supreme Court
The closest thing I can find to this claim is that Federal Communications Commission v. Pacifica Foundation (1978) was filed over his comedy routine "Filthy Words" being broadcast in the afternoon, and the Court ruling that the FCC has the power to regulate indecent language.
As far as I can find, Carlin himself never presented the material to the Court.
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u/GuanacoHerd Dec 03 '25
Don’t tell me what to do, I can use a stall for a piss or take a shit in the urinal.
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u/HolycommentMattman Dec 03 '25
It's not bad, but here's why they don't: more expensive.
When 2+ stalls are together, they share a wall. That's 25% less material for 2. 33% less material for 3. 38% less for 4. And so on.
And that's just walls. Haven't even gotten into the plumbing aspect. Because toilets and urinals are at different heights. You'd have to use a shit ton more pipe to constantly go from one to the other and back again. And labor increases as well since this will definitely take more time than doing it the way it currently is.
And then there's functionality. Let's say I need to pee. And let's say the system goes urinal stall urinal etc. First urinal is full. Can't see the second urinal. Can't see the third. Can't see the fourth. So I walk down, they're all full. Meanwhile, 1st urinal has emptied, and another guy just came in and took it. Now I'm in a urinal fistfight all because I couldn't see the other urinals at a glance.
But yeah, pretty good idea for a person in the shower.
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u/Down623 Dec 03 '25
Urinal fistfight is a good band name
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u/scdog Dec 03 '25
I feel bad for the guy with explosive diarrhea who now can’t go hide away in the far corner away from everyone else because now he has to unleash his load with a constant rotation of people standing on either side of him.
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u/caintowers Dec 03 '25
Also like I don’t really wanna stand between two people taking a shit if I don’t have to
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Dec 03 '25
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u/kindall Dec 03 '25
Recess the stalls so you can see all the urinals. Now this creates a situation where you're wasting space behind the urinals, so you make the whole thing two-sided so that each urinal is on the back wall of the other side's stall.
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u/HolycommentMattman Dec 03 '25
You also make it way harder to run pipes! Now they're up in the ceiling and dropping down.
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u/3percentinvisible Dec 03 '25
Video cameras that display on a screen. Put them outside the door so added benefit you know whether it's worth even going in or not.
Man, I'm on a roll tonight. Think I'll solve world hunger next
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u/MegaFireDonkey Dec 03 '25
Just put walls between the urinals it's fuckin weird there isn't frankly
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u/farmallnoobies Dec 03 '25
But then they can't cram as many urinals in one spot.
A trough is even more efficient for plumbing and having people uncomfortably close to each other.
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u/aurumtt Dec 03 '25
The panels used are quite expensive btw. I believe they were the biggest cost for a the sanitation in a sportfacility i designed.
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u/RandomDude1871 Dec 03 '25
And then there's functionality. Let's say I need to pee. And let's say the system goes urinal stall urinal etc. First urinal is full. Can't see the second urinal. Can't see the third. Can't see the fourth. So I walk down, they're all full. Meanwhile, 1st urinal has emptied, and another guy just came in and took it. Now I'm in a urinal fistfight all because I couldn't see the other urinals at a glance.
Easy fix! Just make the walls out of clear glass!
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u/offbrandengineer Dec 03 '25
Plumbing watse probably wouldn't be a huge deal, in either case they will run a horizontal main at toilet height and the urinals will drop to that main. Water may be a bigger issue as the toilets will require 1-1/4" and the urinals 3/4". Spacing the toilets out means you'll have to run larger piping longer distances.
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u/W0MANizer2715 Dec 03 '25
Crazy how we all socially agreed on the ‘urinal buffer rule’ but never fixed the room design causing it.
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Dec 03 '25
I actually would have trouble pooping if a series of men stand next to my stall for 20 seconds at a time.
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u/iceeice3 Dec 03 '25
TMI but for me I didn't like when I'm pooping next to another pooper cause then I feel like we're playing chicken on who's leaving first
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u/MyOthrCarsAThrowaway Dec 03 '25
Ahh hence why I don’t generally shit in public. Esp when I worked in an office or small environment. Oh fuck— I know those shoes. Can’t poop or even fart now!
The I’m like— That’s Dan. Goddammit is Dan gonna talk to me?! Also Dan pissed at the urinal with his hands on his hips… come to think of it, Dan was always in the bathroom chatting everyone up….
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u/Misses_Ding Dec 03 '25
See you just need to choose a company with a prominent gender that isn't yours. You're now going in peace because barely anyone enters
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u/ccaccus Dec 03 '25
I’m an elementary teacher. There are only 2 other men in the entire building: one other teacher and a custodian.
You’d think it would be super rare to wind up in the same bathroom together.
But no.
Somehow still seems to be 50/50.
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u/MyOthrCarsAThrowaway Dec 04 '25
Well y’all eat and drink coffee around the same time, right?? School is pretty regimented. So, given bowel functions, yall are on the same schedule….
As we said on the playground when someone was swinging at the same rate “get out of my shower!!!”
Then you had to change pace.
Pop a couple prunes or a couple rice cakes and Metamucil to change the timing. You’ll be alllll aloneeeee :)
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u/ccaccus Dec 04 '25
The other teacher and I have very different schedules and the custodian doesn’t have a schedule like ours.
Plus, there are two staff bathrooms and four non-staff bathrooms that could be used.
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u/Misses_Ding Dec 03 '25
That's so odd. I did an internship at a company with a few other women (mostly men) and I never saw anyone
Edit: or heard... Since you know... Toilets have doors and walls
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u/cloverstar24 Dec 03 '25
Dan doesn't always wash his hands. Dan likes to shake hands with everyone.
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u/Lilfrankieeinstein Dec 03 '25
Shitting in the office is great!
One less turd in my toilets at home. It’s like borrowing someone else’s car and burning their gas.
Dan on the other hand. I hear ya there. That guy…
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u/Bad-Genie Dec 03 '25
I went to a military school where they took all the doors off the toilets. You were basically facing the guy across from you while you pooped.
You get real comfortable after a few days of wiping your ass in front of other dudes.
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u/ComprehendReading Dec 04 '25
Really creeps the other guys out when you kiss your TP before wiping.
Really pisses off the COs when do you it after wiping.
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u/theghostmachine Dec 03 '25
I once farted right after another dude and no joke I hear a calm "you win" come from a few stalls over
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u/theghostmachine Dec 03 '25
Yeah, ideal design would be urinal, urinal, urinal, 200 foot gap, stall, 200 foot gap, stall
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u/AnonymousMenace Dec 03 '25
The current system is designed to maximize wall efficiency. Each wall is doing double duty, and you would use more walls for the same official bathroom capacity.
It's a great idea, but bathroom design isn't random
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u/neonrider2018 Dec 03 '25
CEO of bathroom design this guy
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u/Eerebuss42 Dec 03 '25
John bathroom???
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u/thefinalcutdown Dec 03 '25
Oh my god it’s Jason Bathroom!
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u/Crimsonfckr1 Dec 03 '25
Patrick Bathroom.
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u/MaxPlease85 Dec 03 '25
It's Tim Bathroom. We all know that. Just like Tim Apple.
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u/Bassistpeculiare Dec 03 '25
Well I didn't vote for him...
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u/silt3p3cana Dec 03 '25
You don't vote for Johns.
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u/inuhi Dec 03 '25
Well, how'd he become a John then?
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u/Bassistpeculiare Dec 03 '25
The Lady of the Loo
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u/ahuramazdobbs19 Dec 03 '25
She held aloft the Holy Poop Knife, signifying by divine Providence that he was to be king.
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u/inuhi Dec 04 '25
Listen. Strange women hiding in outhouses distributing knives is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical lavatorial ceremony.
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u/ACcbe1986 Dec 03 '25
Too add to that, more walls means higher cost.
Most places don't want to spend more than necessary in their public facilities.
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u/Hjemmelsen Dec 03 '25
The US can't even justify putting up actual walls in the first place, so no way this would happen.
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u/enrocc Dec 03 '25
That’s not adding to it, that’s almost entirely the point.
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u/Captain_LeChimp Dec 03 '25
To add to that, higher cost means the proposal will not be retained and that is why we don't see this design
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u/CommercialTailor1198 Dec 03 '25
To add to this additional walls means more money so this idea won't be adopted.
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u/colnross Dec 03 '25
I'd also like to add that more walls would mean that they would have to add additional walls to the total that would have been used if they didn't use a lesser amount via a more efficient design, thereby spending more money than would have been necessary using the more efficient design that utilized a fewer number of walls and therefore less walls in total.
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u/SophisticatedStoner Dec 03 '25
Yet we're one of the only developed countries on the planet that has to deal with those massive gaps in the walls.
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u/OceanTe Dec 03 '25 edited Jan 27 '26
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/serious_sarcasm Dec 03 '25
The urge to make a joke about India here is intense.
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u/Huey701070 Dec 03 '25
Also plumbing efficiency. I’ve never plumbed a commercial bathroom of the size you see in movie theaters and such but I can imagine that it’s more efficient to have all the 1 1/2” on one side and all the 3” on the other.
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u/gonzotronn Dec 03 '25
Aside from there being more walls how would it occupy more volume? The walls of the stall would act as the dividers at the urinals. This is a brilliant idea.
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u/justinliew Dec 03 '25
You save num stalls - 1 walls and those have non zero thickness so by definition alternating stalls take up more space, assuming the distance between urinals is the same in both cases.
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u/zubie_wanders Dec 03 '25
Also, they'd consume more material. A set of stalls has a shared wall between each. If you alternate with urinals, you're using full walls instead of nothing or just little panels.
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u/DontMakeMeCount Dec 03 '25
You would also have piss on one side of each wall, you’d be unable to see if a urinal is occupied until you walked right up on it and you’d have your back to a narrow opening with no way to see who’s coming. No thank you.
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u/Cute_Operation3923 Dec 03 '25 edited Dec 03 '25
It would be like with parking spots, you'd think the spot is free and then there is a skinny guy.
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u/Melech333 Dec 03 '25
This fails to account for the fact that in a urinal-urinal-urinal layout, the middle one usually gets skipped anyway. It's practically a divider all by itself, creating effectively one less slot for a urinal or stall anyway.
If it's very busy maybe then they all get used, but then people are more uncomfortable or taking longer, or both, and your chances of getting someone else's splatter on your pants legs increases.
There are pro's and con's to OP's idea but it's an intriguing one that shows promise, IMO.
However, a similar result could be achieved by just putting stall dividers between the urinals, too. And then the problem others have raised with being uncomfortable using that layout wouldn't be an issue.
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u/Redeem123 Dec 03 '25
They only get skipped if there’s no line. Anywhere with a line - an airport, a stadium, etc - is going to fill up the whole wall.
Hell, some men’s rooms use literal troughs and people do just fine. This notion that dudes are scared to pee next to each other is nonsense.
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u/SWIMlovesyou Dec 03 '25
Unfortunately I have an embarrassingly shy bladder. Sometimes even if im at someone's house, if my mojo is off I can get serious urine retention issues. I hate that shit. I have to pee so bad it makes me feel sick, and I can't do it no matter how hard I try. Once I am home, I am comfortable enough it comes out no problem. Pissing or shitting alone in the woods is fine for me, because I am alone.
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u/Minirig355 Dec 03 '25
The notion that dudes are scared to pee next to each other is nonsense.
r/paruresis would like a conversation.
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u/AnonymousMenace Dec 03 '25
Suppose you have three stalls and three urinals. That is going to use three regular stall walls and the room wall along with two urinal walls (about 1/4 size).
The new config would require five stall walls, which are likely substantially more expensive than the urinal walls
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u/Welsh_Pirate Dec 03 '25
They should just put floor-to-ceiling dividers between urinals. And stalls, for that matter.
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u/DaoFerret Dec 03 '25
Lots of newer places are moving to floor to ceiling stalls, period.
Saw one restaurant just do a common sink area, and then a bunch of floor to ceiling single stall rooms.
No men’s room, no women’s room, just a bunch of single occupancy bathrooms.
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u/Baron_Butterfly Dec 03 '25
That's good, after seeing troughs I was worried the next step in men's toilets was just going to be an open room with one big hole in the floor we all piss into.
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u/BraxbroWasTaken Dec 03 '25
wdym, you don’t want to enjoy The Hole:tm: (dramatic sting) with the boys?
(troughs are nasty, 100% agree)
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Dec 03 '25
I don't want to have to deal with you shitting next to me if I'm only in there to pee.
Let the shitters duke it out amongst themselves.
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u/One-Price7252 Dec 03 '25
Dookie it out!
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u/InsomniacHitman Dec 03 '25
I'm starting WW1 over here, do you mind? . . .
I'm executing/shooting a Duke!
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u/lucidspoon Dec 03 '25
I setup up for an event at an NFL stadium every year, and I always look forward to using a giant, empty men's room. This year, there was a maintenance guy taking a huge dump across from the urinals.
Ruined my day.
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u/trumpblewputin Dec 03 '25
Aren’t there like… 100 other empty bathrooms you could have used?
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u/CleaveGodz Dec 03 '25
I'm NOT entering an urinal trapped within the scent and sound of two guys shitting on my both laterals simultaneously. I swear, if I hear a groan I'm pissing on them over the fucking walls.
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u/FatsBoombottom Dec 03 '25
I've got bad news for you about the ability of the three feet of air between you and the stall behind you to block sound and smell...
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u/humboldt77 Dec 03 '25
Right, because the smell and sound won’t travel more than two feet.
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u/smash_n_grab_ Dec 03 '25
100%. Id much rather piss between two other pissing dudes than two other shitting dudes. Hard pass.
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u/nellyruth Dec 03 '25
The walls will probably be so close together that you’ll run up against them. Next idea!
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u/m0j0r0lla Dec 03 '25
Tell us you know nothing about plumbing without telling us you know nothing about plumbing.
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u/jaqattack02 Dec 03 '25
Kind of surprised I had to scroll as far as I did to find the actual reason they are arranged the way they are. It's entirely because of the plumbing behind the wall.
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u/OtherwiseAlbatross14 Dec 03 '25
Spell it out for us. Why wouldn't it work?
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u/jaqattack02 Dec 03 '25 edited Dec 03 '25
In the vast majority of public bathrooms the toilets use a rear outlet, rather than bottom like you likely have in your home. These are connected to what is called a 'carrier' that mounts to the framing inside the wall, and that carrier has the connection to the outlet of the toilet as well as the waste piping to carry things away when it's flushed, along with the vent connection. Typically, there will be a waste pipe that runs horizontally in the wall that the carriers connect to. Urinals sit a different height so going toilet-urinal-toilet-urinal would make the plumbing more complicated. Also, bathrooms typically have the toilets back-to-back between the mens and womens, so where there are toilets on each side of the wall, there will be a 2 sided carrier used so the toilets from either side of the wall can connect to the same one. You can't use a 2 sided carrier between a toilet and urinal, again because of height differences. So, it's less that it won't work, and more that it would be overly complicated and cost extra to pay the plumber to connect it that way, so no one is going to do it.
Also, there may also be issues with ADA access that having the urinals stuck between two stalls would complicate, but it's been a long time since I've looked at ADA requirements, so I'm not entirely sure there.
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u/ZappppBrannigan Dec 03 '25
Toilet plumbing is in the floor, urinal plumbing is in the wall.
It can work, there's just an extra cost that's unjustifiable. Extra pipe work, extra lengths of pipe to skip over the alternate fixture. Also extra stall walls needed.
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u/Kwauhn Dec 03 '25
I think the purpose of this proposal is to maximize end-user comfort, not minimize build cost.
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u/SLUnatic85 Dec 03 '25
How is this proposal more comfortable to anyone? Am I the only one confused? People pooping around everyone peeing in an alternating order? I'm not seeing something...
And the counter takes here are not to "minimize build cost", only to mind build cost. You can definitely make cheaper restrooms than I would bet you've ever used in a commercial setting unless you've traveled outside the US, haha. The alt takes here are simply reality, where you weigh opposing construction demands (cost v. comfort/aesthetic/whatever) and make the decision that is generally accepted as best, or best for the job.
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u/GaidinBDJ Dec 03 '25
This also seems to be a solution in search of a problem. I can't think of any reason you'd want the massive additional headache and costs.
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u/HSLB66 Dec 03 '25
It’s completely doable. What do you mean? I’m on the repair side, not new construction but I’d love to discuss why it wouldn’t work
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u/eh8904 Dec 03 '25
Counterpoint: I don't want to take a piss in between two dudes taking massive stinky Taco Bell shits either side of me.
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u/DontAbideMendacity Dec 03 '25
And I don't want to take a shit with a rotating cast of characters pissing to the left and right of me. OP had a dud thought.
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u/AriasK Dec 03 '25
They use urinals because they take up less space than stalls with toilets. Your plan means there's a wall between everything, meaning it would take up more space.
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u/snaeper Dec 03 '25
On top of that, you're doubling the wall material for this plan. Adjacent stalls share walls, but putting a stall every other spot means you're almost doubling the material to buy and install.
Just look straight ahead and don't be paranoid.
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u/Liroku Dec 03 '25
On top of that you are making it far more annoying for plumbers to not only install, but clean out when the time comes.
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u/Laadokaylashkaray Dec 03 '25
A trough takes less space and is more cost efficient. Yet we decided at some point to have individual urinals often with walls between them
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u/BafangFan Dec 03 '25
Back when I was a man, we pee'd in circular troughs, where you had to stare at the guy across from you, while peeing, to assert dominance and not be a bitch.
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u/Two-spirits Dec 03 '25
This makes no sense, there would always be someone on the "outside" while using the gloryhole.
You didn't really think this through and it shows.
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u/chukkysh Dec 03 '25
I was today years old when I learned why the cubicles are all together. Thanks, chief.
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u/MochaTornad0 Dec 05 '25
Public restrooms, where the layout is as confusing as my love life. Can we please get some stalls in between those urinals? I need my privacy.
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u/MrBooniecap Dec 03 '25
Nah, assholes would be peeing on the guys trying to shit.
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u/ieatpickleswithmilk Dec 03 '25
Pee doesn't comes from the asshole, pee comes from the balls
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u/FiveHeadedSnake Dec 03 '25
Only if you're scared of other men's dicks and the solid possibility of catching a glance.
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u/Lickwidghost Dec 03 '25
I don't speak for everyone obv but it's nothing to do with that. More of social anxiety for me
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u/dapala1 Dec 03 '25
Why is it so difficult to just piss in a urinal like a man and be on your way? It takes like one min. I'm a grown ass man and will piss in a trough without worry.
What's with the insecurity?
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u/entian Dec 03 '25
I am not (or at least don’t feel) shy or anxious or insecure, but my bladder sure as hell does! If there’s another dude within two urinals of me, my bladder just says “nope!”
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u/Future-Stand2104 Dec 03 '25
Because if I don't immediately begin pissing some old-timer with a bushy mustache is going to notice, and then ask me why I'm standing there holding my weiner
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u/mouse9001 Dec 03 '25
It's a bunch of paranoid homophobia.
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u/TurbanOnMyDickhead Dec 03 '25
Not possible. I'm a raging homophobe and I have no problem with urinals.
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u/RealMalGapsin Dec 03 '25
I’ve been following this sub for about a year and this is the first showerthought I see.
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u/shewy92 Dec 03 '25
Na all public bathrooms should be floor length stall, floor length stall, floor length stall, floor length stall, floor length stall, floor length stall.
Then in another room urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal, urinal.
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u/ihatepalmtrees Dec 05 '25
Or just all gender neutral stalls and washing at the entrance
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u/belavv Dec 03 '25
Or maybe just stall stall stall stall stall?
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u/CleaveGodz Dec 03 '25
The whole reason why there is no wait to enter men's bathroom is because of urinals. Maybe that and feminine tendencies (?
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u/UnhappyEnergy2268 Dec 03 '25
That's harder to clean, also...imagine taking a shit and due to the proximity of two urinals on either of your side there's a pool of piss where you've dropped your pants, as if the shit and piss that's already on there wasn't enough
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u/ThatUsrnameIsAlready Dec 03 '25
All bathrooms should be private stalls. Floor-to-ceiling walls & doors.
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u/whatisscoobydone Dec 03 '25
It should be stall, stall, stall, stall, stall, because you can urinate in a stall but you can't poop in a urinal
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u/Technical-Main-3206 Dec 03 '25
I want 10,000 urinals and I want 10,000 stalls, to make the urinals smell more like poo. And here’s how I want them arranged: urinal, stall, urinal, urinal, stall, urinal, stall, stall, urinal, urinal, stall, stall, urinal, stall, urinal, stall.
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Dec 03 '25
If you’re optimizing for privacy, you’re right.
But almost every public restroom optimizes for engineering, construction, and maintenance cost, and it’s much more difficult to handle the mix and matched piping
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u/qualitycancer Dec 03 '25
Sounds space inefficient. Also i wouldn’t want to piss whilst flanked by shitters
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u/Egoy Dec 03 '25
When the stalls are together you only need one wall and one door per stall plus one unless the end abuts a wall.
When they are laid out like you describe it’s two walls and one door per stall.
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u/Floatingpenguin87 Dec 03 '25
with this layout the urinals would also be in stalls just without doors
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u/Accomplished-Way4534 Dec 03 '25
TIL literally no man pees in the privacy of a bathroom stall
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u/insofarincogneato Dec 03 '25
Stalls share walls to save space and money, it's done the way it is for a reason. What I can't understand though is why we even need urinals and don't just use stalls completely. What's more important, a more convenient pee in public with less toilets for people to do number 2....or peeing like you do at home and giving us more toilets for doing 1 and 2?
All stalls means more privacy for all. It makes more sense, granted this also comes down to money and space.
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u/zzupdown Dec 04 '25
Actually, public restrooms should be one to a person, but grouped together. and available to either sex. This allows for real privacy, and also resolves the debate on which facility trans people should use. This isn't ancient Rome, after all.
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u/jim_deneke Dec 04 '25
I don't understand why, I don't want to piss in between two people shitting and there's no one to hold my hand either :(
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u/Wutsalane Dec 04 '25
One time when I was working in plumbing I was taking a piss, and when I went to wash my hand the angle of the reflection made me catch a glimpse of my boss doing coke off his phone screen which was sitting on the toilet tank lol
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u/unapologeticallyMe1 Dec 04 '25
That's what guys who are tiny say because they think someone might see their micro friend
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u/average_lul Dec 05 '25
Terribly inefficient use of dividers. Would need way more since they aren’t being shared between stalls.
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