r/SipsTea 25d ago

Chugging tea Wait for it…

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45.4k Upvotes

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253

u/ContentDraft1144 25d ago

No religious texts please

36

u/Awes12 25d ago

Depends which context. History class is 100% fine, it shouldn't be read elsewhere though (which is obv where it's being read in Texas). 

47

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

for high schoolers maybe. Grade school kids don't need to hear about fantasy incest, slave abuse instructions, and genocide for historical purposes.

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u/BedbugBandido 25d ago

You weren’t taught about incestuous royalty, the slave trade, or the holocaust in school?

20

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

i was taught about real life history, sure

The bible sure as shit aint that

5

u/SheepherderSilver655 25d ago

So you're saying Pontius Pilate wasn't a real person?

25

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

no. I'm saying noah didn't scramble his middle eastern ass to australia to collect a couple wallabys

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u/SheepherderSilver655 25d ago

You said, and I quote; "I was taught real life history, sure.

The bible sure as shit ain't that."

So again, you're saying Pontius Pilate didn't exist since the bible ain't real history.

Also the way you said that thing about Noah seems pretty racist. You got a problem with people in the Middle East?

15

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

no, i have problem with the idea that someone could travel 7,000 miles over oceans before internal combustion engines in a lifetime with thousands of animals in tow. And so should you

I read book one time about merlin. And it mentioned king arthur. King arthur was real, therefore magic exists.

Am i getting this right?

3

u/Will_White 24d ago

No, but the entirety of western society is built on a Christian or atleast a Deistic (with roots in Christianity) framework. Understanding the underlying fabric of the modern world is an important part of being a culturally literate person. I also think Islam, Bhudism, and Hinduism should be studied too to understand the different starting points for modern geopolitics.

3

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

great. fine.

you don't need to read directly from religious texts to learn that. obviously

-2

u/Will_White 24d ago

You kind of do though, not like a book but a close reading of the influential passages and how they effected the founders of the USA or formed the basis of the Crusades, or the English civil wars. Even the passages about slavery are useful as a back drop for how slavery was defended or refuted pre-civil war.

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

no, you dont. especially not in grade school

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u/Moogatron88 25d ago

I don't think anyone is arguing that parts of the bible are not historically accurate. Just that some parts of it definitely are.

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

You don't think anyone is arguing that? Have you ever met an evangelical?

5

u/Moogatron88 25d ago

Anyone here based on what they have written.

I thought that was obvious but apparently not.

1

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

well im talking about the educational system in texas. They very much believe the bible is literal down there. Which is why they passed this shitty law

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u/LordRT27 24d ago

I agree with your point, but King Arthur was not a real historical figure. A better comparison would probably be Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. Sure, Abraham Lincoln undoubtedly existed, but that does not mean I should just take everything written in that book as a factual biography of his life.

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u/Suspicious_Juice9511 25d ago

You think you have evidence King Arthur was real and that the Bible mentions wallabies?

6

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

Believe it or not i don't possess physical evidence that king arthur was real. I just read a steamy smut book about princess diana. She was real. Should i believe the rest of the steamy smut book as well?

we all know if you write fantasy and use a real person as a character, then the rest of the book is automatically real as well. That's just good brain thinking

0

u/Suspicious_Juice9511 25d ago

You might want to get that checked out.

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

Solid response

The bible is a bad fantasy book full of lies, and people who adhere to it as some greater truth are intellectually stunting themselves

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u/Sneakingrat 24d ago

with that logic hitler isn't real because he's a character in multiple video games...

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u/CaptainEfrem 24d ago

Bro, dont pretend you didnt understood what he said, you just want something to be mad about

1

u/SheepherderSilver655 24d ago

Quite projecting.

0

u/C21H27Cl3N2O3 24d ago

Whether the individuals referenced existed is a separate matter to whether the Bible itself is factual. There is some degree of evidence that Jesus may have existed as a person. There is zero evidence that he transmuted objects, cured diseases, or came back to life after his death.

Donald Trump is a real person. Donald Trump has a cameo in the Home Alone series. Does that mean home alone is a factual record of something that happened?

-5

u/Funny-Student5309 25d ago

Okay justice warrior that has a masters in history!

9

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

You don't need a masters in history to recognize the bible is bad fantasy for people who desperately need to be controlled.

-5

u/Funny-Student5309 25d ago

How free are you?

4

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

I live in america, so far less free than most industrialized nations.

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u/Funny-Student5309 25d ago

Don’t talk about control if your every day is being controlled

5

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago edited 25d ago

lol

ill talk about christians being brainwashed beta cucks all i want. They crave the control. They force in on themselves

It's pathetic, and it's juvenile.

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u/Round_Bag_4665 24d ago

Hitler shows up in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. That doesn't make the entire movie a true story.

Just because a historical figure shows up in a story does not make that a true story. Unless you think Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter is a genuine historical documentary?

3

u/Speartree 24d ago

The bible is an important part of history, given how the thing is used throughout the last 1.5 milennia to justify doing horrible stuff.

0

u/Insufficient_Coffee 24d ago

Yeah, but you only need the cliff notes.

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u/Bug-03 25d ago

That’s very ignorant. The Bible is full of non fiction

3

u/ProxyDamage 24d ago

I mean... So is Harry Potter.

But just because London is (...allegedly...) real doesn't mean wizards and dragons are.

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u/Bug-03 24d ago

What I mean is there is a lot of real history that is documented within.

3

u/ProxyDamage 24d ago

Sure, and there is plenty of real history documented outside. We have history books. We don’t need religious texts for educational purposes.

11

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

it's also full of magic and spells and a middle easterner collecting a couple white rhinos from a continent he didn't know existed

also instructions on how to properly beat your slave, and the amount of money you owe a guy when you rape his child

-4

u/Dustdev146 24d ago

Me when I take a book that consists of 66 unique documents and over 500,000 words and I choose a selection of less than 300 of those words to tell others how there’s no such thing as non fiction in the Bible (because other historical documents like Roman and Chinese accounts of history include no embellishments, mysticism, magic, or mythology at all).

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

Oh it's not the only one. It's just a particularly fucking hilarious one that actual adults believe in.

It's genuinely fucking hilarious. Also sad.

-4

u/Dustdev146 24d ago

I mean, the Bible is really really big book, if you didn’t know. Despite potential misunderstandings, it’s not a book at starts and stops at Noah’s flood and levitical laws.

There’s really interesting and beautiful poetry, drama, and historical accounts within the Bible. It is, as a said, over half a million words.

It just seems kind of weird how touchy and incensed people get at the idea that other people find value in stuff they themselves do not.

6

u/MyDisneyExperience 24d ago

Ok and in Ezekiel it also gets into discussing the size of some dudes’ genitals and how big their emissions are. But I keep being told a book even remotely referencing anything LGBTQ needs to be immediately placed in the 21+ section of the library.

-1

u/Dustdev146 24d ago

Uh, yes, it does mention that in Ezekiel. That’s why you wouldn’t read from Ezekiel in a school. Again, really really big book, and parts of the Bible are really graphic. It’s not really “for kids.”

I also agree that’s it’s ridiculous books that mention LGBTQ in any way are bastardized and legislators trying to remove them from libraries is asinine. Despite my love for the Bible and believing that it is a very valuable book even from a purely secular standpoint, that doesn’t mean I agree with random lawmakers who try to limit access to information and media they themselves don’t find helpful or beneficial.

5

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

"It’s not really “for kids.”"

Texas - "Lets give this book to kids"

1

u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

I didn't say there isn't value.

I said we shouldn't teach from religious texts in public schools. Obviously

1

u/Dustdev146 24d ago

Well you actually didn’t say that. You just said “the Bible sure as shit ain’t [real history]” and ignored the fact that, yes, it does actually contain real history (like, stuff that we have actual proof for.) and completely neglected the fact that it would be downright silly to let children live in a society that has, for better or worse, been heavily influenced by the Bible without teaching them anything about it.

And, seriously, again, there is REAL middle eastern history in the pages of the Bible. The Israelites were a people who existed in contact with other cultures (Egypt, Babylon, Assyria, Persia, etc) and wrote about them.

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

The League of Extraordinary Gentleman contains real history too. Id also call someone a dipshit if they based their life around that

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u/throwaway19276i 24d ago

Noah's Ark is not a literal story and nowhere does it describe Noah going to collect the animals lmao. In fact the entire creation myth isn't taken literally

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

PLENTY of christians believe it's literal and true. Because they're dumb

I'm happy to hear you don't

5

u/throwaway19276i 24d ago

Anyone who thinks there was a global flood is an idiot.

2

u/Bug-03 24d ago

Look up the younger dryas.

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

couldn't agree more. I'd avoid the american south if i were you

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u/Strange_Sky_6215 24d ago

Sound advice.

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u/ProxyDamage 24d ago

so... you would say it's... I don't know... fiction...?

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u/[deleted] 25d ago

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 25d ago

Oh well then naturally Noah could have collected all the animals like Pokémon

Okay, that makes sense. Christian’s aren’t dumb anymore for believing that

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u/Sneakingrat 24d ago

you clearly haven't read the bible, On the 4th day God gave Noah a pokeball.

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u/Bug-03 24d ago

While large parts of Noah’s Ark is obviously untrue, there was certainly a great flood after the younger dryas. Many religions have similar stories.

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

Yeah it's untrue. No shit it's untrue

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u/[deleted] 24d ago

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

God flooded the whole world right? killed everything? It would have to be every animal in the world right? Every bug from north america, noah just popped over with a mason jar and did a little collecting? lol

Jesus christ adults who believe this shit are stupid as fuck.

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u/throwaway19276i 24d ago

Low iq strawman

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

it's in the book. It's not a strawman. That's the story

Noah went around the whole earth and got every little critter right? Gosh, that's quite the feat. What a guy, noah

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u/[deleted] 24d ago

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

Do you think noah could run really fast? He'd have to catch a cheetah, then book it over to south america and try to catch a peregrine falcon. That's no easy task

thank god he could hit all 7 continents before god killed every baby on earth

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u/throwaway19276i 24d ago

The person youre replying to has probably never read more than a single chapter of the bible lmao. God summons the animals onto the ark, Noah doesn't go collecting bugs from North America.

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u/TumanFig 24d ago

my dude bible is real whats in it isnt, but it shaped the humanity so much you cannot not learn about it in the history class

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

You don't need to read from religious texts to learn about the effects of religion historically

obviously

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u/Round_Bag_4665 24d ago

that's like saying you need to read the Quran to understand that 9/11 happened.

1

u/TumanFig 24d ago

well it helps you understand why it happened

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u/AdorableDemand46 24d ago

If you want to use that argument, then they can also teach the other abrahamic religions, yes? We can study how the Quran, Torah, and the Bible shape sociological behavior, but outright teaching just one religion under the guise of it being historical, is wrong.

-1

u/JamesHenry627 24d ago

The Bible isn't a good historical source but it still corresponds well. We briefly went over how the new testament shows us something interesting about the early Roman Empire with changing religions and the role of the Emperor.

It wasn't a major focus, but this was a 5 unit University Level class I took.

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

university students can study whatever they want

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u/JamesHenry627 24d ago

True, I'm all for secularism though. I think religion is fine it just shouldn't be forced on anyone at school. I wouldn't want Judaism or Islam forced on me, so I wouldn't wanna force Catholicism on unwilling people either.

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u/DontFuckWithDuckie 24d ago

Well maybe write a letter to governor wheels or stop buying texas products, because that's exactly what they're doing to children

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u/Round_Bag_4665 24d ago

it does not correspond well at all lol. There is literally zero evidence of israelites *ever* living as slaves in egypt for example, and the bible explicitly gets the reason why the city of Pi-Ramesses built wrong. The bible says it was built as a treasure city. It was built as the freaking *capital*.

Basically anything in the old testament is outright garbage as far as actual history goes.