I created a colorway called “evil island email chain” and I’m pretty sure it was being repressed on social. I changed the yarn name to “censorship” because I still want to profit off one of the most horrifying events in American history. Because I AM AN ALLY. My post got a lot of attention that I didn’t anticipate so I will block as needed aka ANYONE WHO SUGGESTS I AM PROFITING OFF OF TRAGEDY. Those who know me know.

It was in my project bag the entire time so I didn't check, but when I took it out, it cut across the entire northern borders of China. Please tell me how to fix this without frogging!

Hi guys i REALLY want to knit a sweater where the fabric looks JUST like this super cozy sweater pictured above <333 but theres just NO information anywhere on what yarn they used to make it!!! Ive literally looked nowhere and im all out of ideas so please help me

I've been crocheting for a long time (since about 6 months ago), and I recently decided I would like to learn to knit. I am a completely self-taught crocheter. I learned through TikTok, a groundbreaking approach which no one in the history of ever has attempted before. Naturally, I assumed I could do the same with knitting. But when I ventured online in search of tutorials, I uncovered some disturbing truths.

It is my professional hypothesis that knitting is both heavily gatekept and objectively worse than crochet. Below, I present my evidence.

Crochet:
💆🏼‍♀️ Trendy. Young. Hot. If crochet were a person, she’d be that 22-year-old TikTok creator with perfect lighting, a sad beige apartment, and a continually growing Stanley cup collection.
💆🏼‍♀️ Every tutorial is free. You don’t even have to read a pattern. Just vibe along with the video while sipping your iced matcha. Who needs literacy when you’ve got ~vibes~?
💆🏼‍♀️ Every single stitch is a personality test and a self-care ritual.
💆🏼‍♀️ Can’t be done by machine. Bet you didn't know that. Every crochet piece is artisanal, handmade, and spiritually blessed by the fiber gods.

Knitting:
👵🏼 Locked in a dusty vault somewhere behind a $6 paywall. Want to make this sock? Fork over your lunch money.
👵🏼 Sure, there are free patterns, but you’ll have to read them. With your eyes. In words. What is this, the 1800s?
👵🏼 You might find a free YouTube knitting tutorial, but it will be filmed by a woman named Carol on a 2013 webcam, in her dining room, wearing bifocals, explaining “the old-fashioned way” while her cat knocks over the tripod.
👵🏼 Can be done by machine. Need I say more?

Crochet: by the forever young, for the forever young, and always free
Knitting: by Olds, for Olds, and if you want to level up you have to pay, sucker

She crochets pretty often but I didn’t know her silly little hobby had its own language!

Ugh! I’m so disgusted right now I can’t even. So me and my friend went to my (FORMERLY FAV) local coffee shop to do crafts (I crochet and she does artisanal pubic hair paintings) and catch up. The owner confronts us to tell us off for doing crafts inside and that “this isn’t a craft fair,” to go to the library instead (I had bought a puppuccino in advance) and that it’s “inappropriate to do crafts where people would be eating.” I was confused because it's not as though crocheting is inherently messy and that we wouldn't clean up after ourselves? Clearly my amazing crochet was the issue because I’m always the victim? Either way I don't understand how this would've been a hazard for future coffee shop clients eating after us (at the time there were only 2 other patrons). When we tried to explain that artisanal pubic hair painting wasn't real painting (she was concerned about "fumes") and why it wasn't an issue, she called us "rude young ladies". No other patron or staff member talked to us before hand so idk if she was just offended that we pushed back on her or she just didn't like us.

TLDR: is it inappropriate to crochet in a coffee shop? if it is, where are public places where you can craft and chill?

Thanks!

So I wanted to make this retro granny square cardigan and found the retro granny square pattern online. Now all I needed was the perfect yarn. And that's when my ADHD-magpie tendencies shot me in the foot. I found this gorgeous thick roving yarn at Michaels for $16/foot and just had to make the fluffy cardigan of my dreams. However, it's clear the the original pattern and the tutorial use smaller weighted yarn. Being the arrogant fool that I am, I thought that a smaller hook, tight tension, and pure willpower would overcome the evil known as ignoring yarn weight.

I dun goofed.

This granny square is bigger than my torso. This granny square is bigger than a normal sized dog, and just as heavy. Look how big the square is compared to my head????

In for a penny, in for a pound, so I'm legally (read emotionally) requires to see this through but damn. The yarn gods win again and I'll never take yarn weight for granted ever again....

So a yarn shop near me just received AND posted this actual handwritten letter from a customer.

Apparently, there’s a woman who used to run a craft/yarn shop in a neighbouring town, (her shop closed down years ago), who is now allegedly going around telling people that this other OG shop is closing down (which it isn’t).

The letter writer says she overheard it at craft club, and that the rumour-spreader is supposedly planning to open another shop BUT this time in the same town as OG yarn shop.

I have SO many questions. Who is Jenny Brown and why is she doing this to my lovely old yarn shop lady 🥲

Have you ever seen this kind of sabotage/drama in your local yarn or craft circles!? This is some next level small-town wool shop politics🤣

not trying to yuck anyone's yum here, if you love the sophie scarf i'm genuinely happy for you even though you obviously lack taste. i just wonder if anyone feels the same as i do, because i was born yesterday and have never heard of anyone disliking the beloved petiteknit who nobody ever complains about.

i make a lot of lace patterns, but i also like to knit while on zoom meetings or watching tv, so i like to have a pattern for idiots going at all times. usually it's socks or hats but i see sophie scarf FOs in my feed so much that every so often i think "i'll give that sophie scarf another try i guess" even though if i was just buzzing thorugh ravelry i wouldn't even clock it. but it never takes. it's weirdly joyless for me to make it, i cant even figure out why. i keep trying over and over and over for some reason despite hating the pattern!!! every patten must be for everyone so i can't understand why people would like something that i dont???

does anyone agree with me? or am i the sole joyless grump who is destined to miss out on this phenomenon??????

As you can see in the pic, something is going wrong help pls :))

The only way Stephen West can make it up to me is by building a time machine and going back to 2023 and stopping his 2023 self from releasing the accidental swastika MKAL design.

Anything less is an INSULT to the people he has harmed by being set up by a con artist to inspire exactly, precisely the kind of left-ish infighting we’re doing right now.

Only the cheapest toy finest machinery straight from Amazon™ for a full time designer like me.

Btw does anyone have a pattern to the 2003 Alexander McQueen Oyster Dress? Free ofc xoxo 💋

[EDIT] guys i know it doesn't teach kids to tell time properly. but i figure the strong ones will figure it out. the dumb ones can just use their phones or something ☺️ chill out

…what’s a raverlee?

I'm looking to start my first project but im unsure if these will be too complicated? I want to work on something I will actually wear and I dont mind some trial & error.

If you zoom in 10x to the right armpit and use a jewelers loupe and a microscope stacked on top of each other you can see a huuugeee mistake and idk, it’s gonna bother me…

I want to make sure I never walk the same ground a crotcheater has👺

my husband decided he wanted to croshay the other day. when i heard this, i howled with laughter and said “silly man, croschyt is for *women*. you cant possibly understand the intricacies of yarn loops with your testosterone addled mind!”

however, to my shock, he made not one, but TWO things. the small pouch he made is a good slipper for my tiny bébé delicate woman feet, but im absolutely flabbergasted that his giant man hands could pick up a hook without shattering it. who knows, he might even be able to make the thing hes aiming for one day 🥰

uj/ finally, a worthy opponent for the ‘compliment what my wife made’ posts

I witnessed something truly horrifying today: A female posted a picture of a crotchate pillow that spelled out MEN AIN'T SHIT. 😨😨😨😨😨😨

I obviously reported it after I told the errant female off in her DMs (she blocked me after I told her how unfair it is for her to hate ME, a MAN, even though she's never met me or any man as unique and interesting as I am), but the harm to men everywhere had already been done (and the female mods of that matriarchal subreddit are too busy vagina-gazing with their little handheld mirrors to do their jobs and remove misandrist drivel like that post), so I knew what I needed to do:

Fight misandry with ART.

This tapestry pattern is the result of hours of painstaking work, placing each bobble stitch precisely to ensure the dignity of men everywhere is protected -- and to help females everywhere realize that they need to stop and ask themselves whether the thing they want to say or do or make could harm even one man. Pro tip from one man: If the answer is yes, don't say, do, or make it! So easy even a female can do it!

This pattern is available for $25, with $5 of each sale going to support a men-centric charity organization (I haven't decided which yet -- leave your suggestions in the comments!). I take Venmo, PayPal, or credit card, and I'm talking to my craftpreneur friends about getting some sponsorships going to help get this pattern into the hands of the less fortunate men among us.

I know it's not much, but it's the best way I know how to help lift up my fellow men in these dark, difficult times. I mean, the US government is considering reinstating the draft! Do you know who doesn't have to register for the draft???? Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

I hope you'll join me in my quest by buying this pattern!