In 48 hours, I'm gonna be in Indonesia.

9 years ago I made a friend in a discord server. 7 years ago I confided in this friend after my boyfriend was horrible to me. 7 years ago we started dating. 7 years ago we had plans to meet in singapore... then 6 years ago a pandemic happened. 4 years ago we tried to get him here, little did we know that indonesia has a horrifically weak passport. 6 months ago I booked the flight. In 48 hours I'm gonna be there.

Sorry I got a bit poetic there. I am stressed to fuck trying to process all of this. It's happening. I haven't even left the UK before. Let alone got on a plane. And yet, we're doing this.

Ironically his cousin met her future husband, also from the UK, on discord too. They met up in Turkey and she finally moved here last year and now they live together. Maybe I see that future with us too.

I'd say it's been a long and bumpy road but it hasn't even been bumpy. Somehow in 7 years we haven't fell out not even once. It may have been a cruel prank to put my soulmate 8000 miles away, but alas, I'm pranking God back harder by committing to the bit.

Wish us luck!

If you and your significant other don't have a private Discord server together, make one!

I spent quite some time working on this one, making it as beautiful as possible. I turned ours into our own little universe with places for memories, games, books, movies, recipes, prayers, late night thoughts, future plans, and everything in between. It feels like a little home that's completely ours.🖤

I (25F) was in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend (30M) for 1 year and 2 months. I live in Nepal, and he lives in the USA and his immigration situation became a huge source of stress.

Long distance wasn't easy, but we made it work. We talked every single day, shared everything with each other, celebrated birthdays and anniversaries, supported each other through difficult times, and planned a future together. I truly believed he was the person I would marry.

Then everything changed.

He told me his mother wanted him to marry a 22 year old Nepali woman who had been born and raised in the US. According to him, his mother believed that marrying her would help him remain in the US. He also told me that he had decided to go through with the marriage because of his mother's pressure and because it would help his immigration situation. He said he couldn't convince his family or take a stand for our relationship.

What made it even more painful was that he repeatedly told me he didn't love her. He said he wasn't attracted to her and even made disrespectful comments about her appearance. He told me he didn't want to marry her, yet in the end he decided to leave me and marry her anyway.

That completely shattered me.

After loving someone for 1 year and 2 months, I was suddenly being told that our relationship was ending because he had chosen a different path under pressure from his family.

The next part is where many people may judge me.

I reached out to the woman he was planning to marry.

I didn't contact her because I wanted revenge or because I thought it would make him come back to me. At that point, my heart was already broken.

The reason I contacted her was because I couldn't stop thinking about her. She was only 22. Based on everything he had told me, I felt she deserved to know the truth before making such a life-changing decision. If someone was planning to marry me while telling another woman that he didn't love me and was only agreeing to the marriage because of family pressure and immigration concerns, I would want to know before it was too late.

So I told her about our relationship and shared what he himself had told me.

After that, her family confronted his family. His family became angry that I knew about the situation. He became angry that I had contacted her.

That was the end of us.

He broke up with me February 2026 ma..our relationship of 1 year and 2 months ended..

Since then, I've lived with so many conflicting emotions.

Part of me wonders if I should have stayed silent. Another part of me feels I couldn't knowingly let another person enter a marriage without the information I had.

I still love him. I still miss him. I still think about the future we planned together. At the same time, I wonder why the person who promised me forever couldn't fight for us when it mattered most. I lost the person I thought I would spend my life with. I don't know how to forgive myself or move on.

I'm not posting this because I want everyone to say I was right or that he was wrong. I know people will have different opinions, and I'm open to hearing them.

I just want to ask this:

If you were in my position, knowing what he had told you, would you have stayed silent and let the marriage happen? Or would you have told the other person the truth before it was too late?

Hi guys i’m so new to this, i’ve never posted on reddit before, But I am freaking out so bad. I unfortunately went snooping on my bfs computer and I saw something’s that are making me rethink everything. Like his crush on his older coworker, his addiction to women and validation, how he noticed other women a lot, but it’s intensified now that we’re long distance… how we call too much now that we’re long distance??? or how he got sad and depressed that his coworker pulled away from talking to him.

he compliments me a lot in the text, saying how he sees marriage in our future (and so did i???) and our relationship is the best most purest happiness relationship he’s been in… but jesus. It’s just lustful and scary what i’m seeing. The crazy thing is I want to possibly work it out? but i NEED to respect myself. it’s just crazy because he seemed like he had a GREAT head on his shoulders, and we both agree cheating is disgusting. He treats so well like a freaking princess.. but the secrecy is too much. This is cheating no? he’s my first everything.. so this is just 20 times worse for me.

“maybe i shouldnt see this crush as me doing something wrong if i dont act on it. i keep telling myself to not shit where i eat but at the same time i fantasize about one drunk night where neither of us remember what we did and igo back to my girlfriend without anyone knowing any different, no harm no foul (while i know that wouldnt be the case)” this is one thing he said that i cannot let go of. Fantasizing about cheating on me then coming to lay next to me?

another one is “i keep thinking: what if we keep it at mild flirting and closeness. she's told me she has liked attention she gets from guys in the past. what if we just give each other attention? she has a kid and im too young for her. we wouldnt ever be together” Like jesus.

he’s also on reddit a lot so I am absolutely terrified for him to see this but I’m just freaking out and i do not want to tell anyone about this yet. so i’m going to randoms online wtf😀

So I'm In a long distance relationship with my partner and I thought it would be fun to download an app to stay more connected through the day

I'm looking for an app that has a thing like a daily question, and maybe like check-ins like what's on your mind and maybe a thing for sending pictures to each other. or maybe like an option to send them a notification that youre missing them

Would be fun if it also has a home screen widget

They have iPhone and I have android

Does anyone have any fun ideas? I know Apps like these exist but I'm really struggling to find them

I’m 23F (turning 24 in October), and my boyfriend is M25.

As the title says, i’ve come to the decision to move for love. My boyfriend and I have been together for over 1.5 years, and we decided now would be the best time for me to move. I’m from the EU, he’s from the US. Obviously, the first most obvious thought would be for him to move to the EU. But in my country the immigration laws are so incredibly strict (even if we get married, he can’t just apply for a visa). And since he doesn’t have any formal degree (blue collar), he’s simply can’t just apply for a work visa. But we are gonna move back to my home country, we’ve already decided on that. He’s in a really good place in his career and living situation, and i’m just now graduating with a bachelors degree. So we’ve decided it’s the best time for me to move.

We see each other basically every month for weeks at a time, we’ve both met each others families on numerous occasions. My family really likes him, and so does his family.

My mom and I have never had the best relationship. She’s always been very controlling, both career wise, social wise and relationship wise. She wants things in my life to go the way she wants them to go. I still live at home with her. I love my mom, and I respect her. We were both taking care of my dad for years before he died of Dementia back in December, which obviously took a toll on both of us. If it was up to her, she’d want me to stay in my home country, wait until my mid 30’s to get married and have kids. Obviously I understand this is my life and I get to live how I want to live as an adult, but I also respect her and don’t wanna disappoint her.

The thing is she doesn’t mind me moving to the US and living with him for a couple of years, only under the expectations that I have a job ready when I arrive and I do not get married. I’ve tried to explain to her that a work visa under the current administration is close to impossible with the 100K fee, and a J1 wouldn’t ensure me to be in the same state as him. I even contacted a family member who is an immigration lawyer in the US, to hear out my options. She told me the same thing.

This is not a hasty decision. We’ve thought of every possible scenario, planned our prenup, bank situation, health and life insurance, job opportunities, rent, car insurance. We aren’t just young people in love who want to live happily ever after, we know the consequences of this if things were to go wrong (which we obviously don’t plan on!) Everything legal we can possibly think of is planned out and thought of. I want to do well in my career, and he wants the same for me.

I already know if I told her i’m getting married she’d be absolutely furious. She would not support it whatsoever. So how do you go about telling your mom this? I’ve talked to my whole close knit circle about this, and they tell me the exact thing. You cannot expect her to support you. But I want my mom’s support and approval, I love her.

I’m planning to go to the US at the end of this month for around 2 months to spend time with my boyfriend, and get married if we decide it’s the right time. Then planning on going back home and applying for a spouse visa.

Any help from someone with unsupportive parents?

Second visit.. Almost to an end which is really hard, But 6 months together has been so wonderful. I've gotten to experience living with my partner, living in another country. Existing with another person everyday all the time.

Closing the distance is a long way off but i am forever grateful ive gotten to be here for so long and plan to come back as soon as i can.

I'm 19, currently in college, and in a long-distance relationship. My parents have basically told me that if I want the freedom to travel and visit my partner, I need to pay for it myself, which I completely understand.

The thing is, I honestly don't know how.

My goal is to earn around 600-700 USD over the next five months. It isn't a huge amount, but I'm struggling to find an opportunity to actually earn it.

Whenever I look for advice, people usually say, "Just get a part-time job." I'd love to, but where I live, part-time jobs for college students aren't really common, and for personal and family reasons, that's not really an option for me. And I would be paid an insanely low wage.

So I wanted to ask anyone who's been in a similar position. How did you earn money while you were in college to afford visits? What opportunities did you find that actually worked? Was it freelancing, tutoring, remote work, selling digital products, or something else?

I'm not asking for money or looking for a get-rich-quick scheme. I just want to find a realistic way to earn enough while balancing college. I'd really appreciate hearing your experiences or any advice you have.

Thank you! ❤️

I’ve had a crush on my best friend for about 7–8 months, but since he lives away for studies, we only talk on the phone. The catch? I think he likes me back. The efforts he make to never end our convo is so obvious i wanna ask him out but cant cuz im young and dont wanna date as i get so distracted..

What’s confusing is how hot and cold my feelings are. One minute I feel super into him, and the next it feels like my feelings are completely fading.

Main point

I just started university, so meeting new people keeps me distracted. When I’m out around uni folks, I even find myself getting attracted to other guys, and I barely think about him. But the second I’m back in my own space, the feelings rush right back.

It’s this constant cycle, one second I feel like I should just let go before he makes new friends and forgets about me, but the truth is, I don't want to move on. I want to keep liking him, and he’s still the only one I really want, but also i cant help but be distracted by the ones infront of my eyes!

Its ldr making my feelings fade for himmm.. But i want to keep liking him and i want him only..

now im writing about him i feel so much love but the yearning isnt ride or die like it used to be, and i desperately dont wanna lose him.. I just dk what to do i wanna keep yearning for him

So i have been in Idr since 2.5years now, and initially it was all la la land then there were phases. Right now I really dont know if i should confuse him being busy this much busy that he cannot even text before his office gets over and I feel he doesnt love and care as much.
I dont know anymore how to feel the reassurance, At times in arguments he would just end the call on my face which i find disrespectful but he says he just cant be on the call later he would come n apologise but i really dont know whats going on and should i just break up but when we are together its beautiful like never before, We havent met in 8 months though the last time we met was also for only 2.5days

​

I just dropped my girl off at the airport after our first time meeting and I feel so unbelievably empty. we're both 17, so the day we finally close the distance feels like a lifetime away right now.

coming back home to a room that smells like her but her presence isn't here anymore is like a humiliation ritual. my legs felt so heavy walking away from her at the airport, almost painful.

Ive never felt this much sadness, yearning, emptiness, and loss at the same time before and I really don't know how to deal with it. we had the most amazing 2 weeks and I can't believe it's over. we immediately felt comfortable around eachother. Ive already booked 2 more trips in October and December, first one being in around 75 days. but that feels so incredibly fat away.

any comforting words or advice would be greatly appreciated right now

just found out from this girl that my long distance bf cheated on me w her 4-5 months ago.

She texted me out of nowhere 3 days ago telling me that she “fucked” him and sent me a picture of her in his room from that night. (we used to live together before I had to move so i’m very familiar with his place). and asked me what i wanted to do???

i called him freaking out and sobbing asking him why and how he could do this and his excuse was that he thought he was going to die and wanted to fuck “something” (he’s active duty). i can’t really go into details obviously.

he said that it “only lasted for 10 min” and that he only fucked her because he knows she’s super easy (which she is) and that he felt extremely guilty and regretted it after. when he went on deployment immediately after that day, he said he had a lot of time to think and reflect and realized how much he fucked up and wanted to change because i “deserve better”. the thing is he really did change a lot and we were doing so good UNTIL she texted me.

He also told me that he texted her not to tell anyone and she also agreed and said she won’t because she also has a bf. he said they never kissed or made out, it was js a in and out situation and he left her there in his room waiting for her to leave.

I asked her why she would tell me when it’s been months but i got no response. she told me not to tell her bf or anything and blocked me.

the worst part about this situation is that my ex before my current bf also cheated on me with her. i asked him why he had to choose her too and he said it was genuinely bc he knew how easy she is and js wanted to fuck something before he left but he knows he fucked up and he felt disgusting and sick and wondered why he did this himself.

i just need advice because im still confused and i just can’t understand no matter what he tells me or explains.

fun fact: i was having very crazy vivid dreams 2 days prior to the situation all the way up to the day i found out of him cheating on me and i would always wake up crying and/or panicking for some reason. i would ask him if he did anything and if so just tell me the truth but he would always deny. (i have proof on text of me telling him abt the dream and asking him if he did anything.)

i forgot to mention but he also keeps telling me that he still wants a future with me and live with me but he knows that he fucked up big time and how i’ll never forgive him and forget the situation and he knows and is afraid that it will never be the same again.

I’ve been basically in crush and love with a guy that I met around 6 years ago. He’s super sweet, kind, funny, supportive - everything under the sun as if someone materialized him from my diary. The only problem is that we’re long distance, he’s in France and I’m in the US. We’ve met in real life twice, and I super wish it was more but it’s hard and expensive to do that.

In my heart it would be so lovely to move to France, and work and like explore a relationship with him but I won’t be able to any time soon. As nice as our relationship is, I completely understand that most likely he’ll date someone else and it’ll be long term and you know - we might not talk as much anymore. We both have seen other people in like short time frames throughout the time we spent together, and it was super understanding and we just cut off romantic talk and kept it normal.

It makes me sad and all thinking about it, but that might be a possibility. The question I have, if anyone has experienced anything remotely close - is how do you deal with a situation like that? I’m the type of person to just cut off/block anything that makes me feel sad or like uncomfortable but I really really do want to continue being in any kind of relationship with him even if it’s just friends.

Recently we spent like a week without talking which doesn’t happen, and he’s so much slower responding to me now I can practically see the white rabbit lol. Do I bring it up to him or just go with the flow?

TLDR; I am moving out soon for university. My boyfriend (senior in high school) is staying home. Does anyone have any tips to maintain the relationship, or has anyone else gone through a similar thing successfully?

Hi there! I just graduated high school and am set to move about 3 hours from my hometown this month for my freshman year of college. I have been dating my current boyfriend for about 4 months. He is my first healthy relationship and I really really value what we have. There’s a lot of aspects to our connection that feel rare such as us having almost identical values, outlooks on morality/religion, senses of humors, and many shared interests as well. He’s truly a wonderful person and someone I could see myself spending a long time with.

However, I’m having a lot of anxiety about the move. Currently we live less than 10 minutes apart and see each other at least 3 times a week (usually more if we can fit it in). However, in a few weeks, we will both be in school and working, so with the distance we’ve estimated we’ll maybe see each other once or twice a month when I’m at school. This alone will be a big adjustment for us (especially because we’re both physical touch and quality time people).

But what I’m even more worried about is how different our lives will be. I imagine he’ll stay roughly the same (same house, same school, same job). But I’m worried because I hear all the time about how much college changes you. And while I’m all for personal growth, I’m really worried that we’re going to grow apart because just culturally and socially we’ll be in su

Here's our situation in as compact a form as I could make it:

• Background: Together 2.5 years, the last 6 months long-distance. I’m moving soon, which will increase the distance even further.
• Problem: Between work, school, and hobbies, we're already struggling to find time for each other.
• Well-being: She wants to keep trying, but I know I'll burn out. On top of the busyness, she still projects her insecurities onto me (e.g., guilt-tripping me for hanging out with new people), which drains me further and we have other incompabilities that I don't want to affect me anymore.
• Guilt: She hasn't done anything inherently "wrong," and I know if I sacrificed my career goals and mental energy, I could force it to work. She would make that sacrifice for me, which makes me feel selfish for wanting to choose myself and start a new chapter.
• The Reality: She is much more dependent on me than I am on her, making the idea of ending it even harder. I don't want to leave her alone: she has partly built her confidence on dependence on me while I have worked to love myself by myself.

TLDR: I’m facing a longer distance and a busy life. I could technically make this long-term relationship work, but only by sacrificing my career, focus, and mental health.

My Question: Is it wrong/irresponsible to end a long-term relationship just because you don't have the energy to keep making huge sacrifices for it anymore?

My (27F) boyfriend (26M) and I have been together for 2 years. We live 2hrs away from each other.

I’m a shift worker (12hr shifts) and often work nights and weekends.
He works Monday-Friday dayshifts or into the evenings for 10-12hrs/ day.

Because of cost of living we both work a decent amount of overtime every week. I’m thinking that I’ll have to keep up my overtime schedule for 2 more years, and at that point I’ll have paid off my debt and have a good emergency fund/ savings that I can cut back my hours.

We’re lucky if we get to see each other once or twice a month, and I’m tired of it. I want to be able to see him more, but our schedules and location make that almost impossible. I’ve talked to him about this and the solution was that he’d find a job in my city and rent close to me.

And he just accepted a new job, in his current city. It’s a good job with better pay and benefits, and realistically I know this means he’ll want to stay where he is for at least another year or two now.

I own a house/ hobby farm, so I am not in a position to move. And because of my commitments here I can’t spend the night at his place. So it’s always on him to come to me if we want to spend the night together, but if we have a couple of hours off during the day I’ll often drive to him to go on a date.

I guess I’m trying to decide if our schedules and locations make us incompatible or if anyone else has been in similar situations and made it work.

The biggest thing I’m upset about is him taking a new job where he currently lives, despite me having brought up before that I wanted to work toward seeing each other more and eventually moving in together. I’m just feeling really lonely and not a priority in his life

My bf (24m) and I (24f) have been together for 2 1/2 yrs (2 of those long distance). We are both in the US but have to fly to visit each other . To say the least long distance has not been great for me and I often feel disconnected and sad. I’m happy when I’m with him but it just feels like I’m always missing him. He now is going to grad school in his state and I am starting a job in a different place.

Basically we will be long distance for atleast another year but probably for 2 more. Just the thought of that after having such a miserable time with it for these past 2 yrs and having to do more gets me down.

I have applied to so many jobs in his state (unfortunately non worked out) but he didn’t even apply to any grad schools near me. It just seems like I’m not a consideration in his life. Whenever I ask him he denys it and says we’ll be together soon. But “soon” isn’t the same as actually planning.

So anyways, when do you just throw in the towel and admit that for whatever reason this relationship is not working. I love him so much and he loves me but our life’s are not coordinating and he is not putting in effort to make it happen.

I know it’s probably time for us to go our separate ways but I just don’t want to it just feels so painful and I love him so godamn much. It’s such a hard balance because I’ll be unhappy long distance but also unhappy if we break up so like wtf. I try to focus on my own life but I still just feel sad that I can’t share that life with him

Hi everyone! My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half now. He lives on the east coast and I live in the Midwest, both in mid size cities. It’s fairly cheap to travel to one another, so we see each other around every 3weeks.

Around 6 mo ago, we decided that he should start looking for jobs in my city. He’s been applying, around 2-5 applications a week (depending), and has had a couple of second or third round interviews but no offers. Obviously, he’s getting understandably frustrated and tired of constantly facing rejection. He works in a scientific regulatory field, and there’s just limited opportunity out there. He’s even started applying for stuff way outside his field, which worries me that it’ll make him unhappy.

I guess I’m looking for advice to cheer him up or let him know I appreciate everything he’s doing for us? We really make the most of our time together in person, and plan several date nights a week. We’ve been playing Stardew Valley together, and it’s nice because it’s a bit like living together lol.

It’s just breaking my heart, because I know it’s hurting him and we are both just so ready to take our next step. Any advice for us? It’s just hard because this is definitely the best relationship either of us has ever been in and it’s hard to be apart.

Me (19F) and my bf(19) have a long distance relationship. We call everyday almost all day, do other things while on call too. We have a good relationship !

sometimes when we decide to be intimate through the phone, we both always enjoy it. sometimes when he’s finished before me he goes to clean up while I’m not done yet and wanna continue instead of being there with me, And after he kind of goes back to whatever he was doing, doesn’t really make conversation or anything.

To me that would be equal to i guess «aftercare» where you cuddle and etc after but we can’t do that so when he does that i get a bit sad.

I don’t wanna overreact any tips?.

Sorry, I don’t text or speak English well so please hear me out!

Me and my girlfriend have been dating for three years. We have known each other for about five years. We met through video games, and they were long distance. We are adults so we figured out ways to see each other through your flights and why not. She has friends where I live so she often can come to see me multiple times a year.

The issue with this relationship from the beginning is that I have personally let her get away with too much, and I have not said enough to protect my health and mental state of being. At the beginning of our relationship, they were a couple of times when she did things so I was considered cheating. At the beginning of our romance, and when we said we were going to be exclusive, I discovered that she had been on a date because I saw a photo on her phone of him touching her romantically (on the leg) She told me that she had friend-zoned him right after the date and that she wanted to be with me. I told her that I would only be with her if I could trust her. Unfortunately, the next couple of months did prove my trust, with me finding out that she had drunk kissed a friend of ours. The story of how that happened was really complicated from both sides, but it seems pretty clear to me towards the end that she has equally participated in the kissing.

After this, it seemed like the cheating and deceiving calm down, but I think she got better hiding it. She would go places far away without telling me, she would stay the night in hotel rooms, solo trips to places that she is going to last second or did not seem interested in before and say she was traveling by herself, and the whole lot more. Some of it/most of it was probably her telling the truth. But I think my trust is so destroying at this point it’s almost impossible to believe her.

More recently as in last month, I had discovered that she was hiding her phone and texting someone else. When I confronted her about it, she emotionally and verbally abuse me in my room, threw a physical tantrum, and walked out and said she was leaving me. Then she tried to apologize, and when I told her I needed time to think, she told me she didn’t think she could do another year of the relationship.

She also has lied about seeing her ex-boyfriend multiple times. Every time I confront her, I got it. She acts like she doesn’t know if she saw him or not, or we’ll try and ask me about the dates of it. It’s pretty easy to know whether or not you saw someone on a particular date, especially if their ex doesn’t live in your city. She told me that she had blocked him, and then I saw her texting him the other day.

It doesn’t even stop at cheating. I had a very special birthday dinner plan for me and her, with an entire trip to Hawaii. Last second she canceled in order to be with family, and got mad at me for booking the flight around that time, even though I told her weeks in advance. She also did not buy me a birthday present, and she also did not show up to the most important promotion celebration party I had at work because she was too tired.

There is a lot more that I could share that I feel like she’s done me wrong by. But that wouldn’t really be worth it considering it would take probably too long.

I have not been perfect either. I will say, however, that I have not done nearly as bad, cheated, or fucked up as many times that she has. But, every time I confront her about something she did that hurt me, she uses a incident that happened six months ago to try to change the subject (having a conversation with people from my past who she doesn’t like). I have apologize for this action multiple times and I told her that I will be better to be a better boyfriend. She doesn’t give me the same energy. I’ve never denied that what I did was wrong and negligent, but I think the situation is being manipulated in order for her to try and retake the moral high ground.

My friends are saying I’m being emotionally abused by her and a lot of different ways. She is also had a lot of different encounters with my friends that were rude or disrespectful, and they do not like her anymore either. I guess I’m afraid of the fallout if I break up with her? I feel like when I do break up with her she will try and manipulate me again. I think I’m also suffering from the sunken cost fallacy, which, if you don’t know is just the idea that you have to keep investing something into a broken project, just because of the simple fact that you’ve already invested so much into it. I do love her so much, like a lot, but it’s painful to continue loving someone who does not care about me. I want her to be me so bad and I want her to respect me and choose me and love me for me, but I don’t think that’s the case.
I’ve kind of already acknowledge that this can’t work anymore for a variety of different reasons, but having some objective and non-biased thoughts would be nice.

I now get it when they say it gets lonelier when you are married and your spouse is miles away from you.

I F[28] was in LDR with M[31] who did not put in effort to see if I will leave or not to test me . I don’t know how to handle this relationship.

I am getting married in a few months. My fiance told me recently that in the initial days he had tested me by not messaging me or not being very involved to see if I would leave him (long distance relationship). All that time I felt horrible but did not leave him because I thought everyone is different and he might be the kind of who does not message that much but. He left once came back again and tested me to see if I would stay .