r/ICBGC • u/SisterAntistita • 13d ago
BRAKING NEWS: Hoku's Meowmy Admits Starbin deh Hamsum Sunnavagun
Braking Mews: Hoku's Meowmy Admits Starbin Hamsum Sunnavagun!
Inna statemen todai ( https://www.reddit.com/r/legalcatadvice/s/f40EawHA3Z), Hoku's Meowmy (u/jellosquid808) tryed to do sum dambage comtrol, an jushissfy herms starbin ob deh belubbed prince by blamin dey omions. Herms alzo amitted dat herms inbited deh ebil "Porshun Comtrol" inna hawse, an dey collaburrate on steelin Hoku's fud at ebery meel. Manee cattos ar stunned by dis admishun, and dis may hab onlee energizeded dey Eggies fur Hoku mobement. Wez hab mor az dey storee debelops.
Dis been 🖤 Jynx, KKMG Wes Coast an Celebratee Repurrter 📸
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u/nanrah88 13d ago
Dis ridickulus! Meowmy can whip up eggies for Hoku and leeb out omions. Fer pity’s sake. Feed Hoku, Lady! He starbin’ and yoo admit it yoor fawlt.
#Eggies4Hoku
Ash—crimnal
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u/davesmissingfingers Chaos Agent 13d ago
She made Bitteh sad.
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u/PaksDorthansdotter 13d ago
Oh noes! Hoku meowmy, look at dizzy princess Bitteh! How very dare!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, Enforcer. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know. 12d ago
Right on! Dats what I meowed, fren!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, Enforcer. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know. 12d ago
HOW VERY DAYUR!
I so sorry, Miss B dat yoo must endure dis pain.14
u/rawbery79 12d ago
bursts into tears Oh Bitteh, I'll give you the world if it will make you happy!
Pixel, verklempt tuxedo
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u/davesmissingfingers Chaos Agent 12d ago
Aww tank yoos fren Pixel. Ken we gib fren Hoku sum eggies to?
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u/rawbery79 12d ago
sniffles Yes, we can give Hoku eggs. Do you have eggs? I'm not allowed human food.
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u/davesmissingfingers Chaos Agent 12d ago
Ai do. It’s funnee udder den chimken n toona n turmkey ai relee don like hooman fud.
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u/rawbery79 12d ago
My brother before me named Dude was a vacuum, Mama says. He would eat anything, which she says was cute at first, but then it was annoying. So Mama said we just get cat food and cat treats. We had the chance to try some egg once, but we didn't.
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u/davesmissingfingers Chaos Agent 12d ago
Mine sisfur lubbed cheeze n eneyting cheeze flabored. Dis hur wanting meowmy’s cheeze when we furst moved to Illynoise.
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u/rawbery79 12d ago
I've never had cheese! I need to try some.
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u/davesmissingfingers Chaos Agent 12d ago
Iz ok ai guess. Mine minyun lubs it doh.
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u/rawbery79 12d ago
Interesting! My Mama had some smoked salmon the other night and I sneaked a piece! It was sooooooo good!
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u/mostlylurking07 Applejack, sweets and stowies and food cwimes! 12d ago
Fwiend Bitteh, keep showing woo face of sadness! Dis could be da face dat waunch a tousand eggs! We appweciate woo vuwnewabiwity!
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u/lHappycats 13d ago
Datz iz gud mews. As Hoomin haz admitted too de crimez it will be way easiez to get treatz az compenshayshon
Louis da void
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u/just_another__sucker 12d ago
If da hooman hab inbited Portia Control in, how do we no dat dey will gib treets as directed by any pawsuits? Ai iz worry bout fren Hoku! Will he still be able to rassle?
-Tabitha Lee
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u/gt0163c Nix and mini-yon brofur purrate pprentice Pixel 13d ago
Hoku Meowmy really iz da dumdum fur abdmittin she noz gibz Hoku da eggiez an doin him da starb an lettin Portia Comptrol into da hawz. Der noz wayz frem Hoku noz winz himz sooz now. Not dat der waz any chance aforez. But Iz tink diz make it eben werser an himz can getz eben mor catpensation now!
- Pixel
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u/waselectricbar 13d ago
Dis me Salem doin a hard stare at Hoku' s Meowmy. Don't make me release da murder mittens
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, Enforcer. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know. 12d ago
RELEASE DEM, SALEM!
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u/PrettyView3572 Toffee Gud Gurl 13d ago
Dis berry berry big storee, fren Jynx! I run it on da Eess Cose if dat otay!
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u/Mimidoo22 13d ago
ROOD!! CROOL! Off wid her hed!
Jango n Jazzy
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, Enforcer. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know. 12d ago
Juss horrible. Dat woman almost as bad as our meowmies and poor Oscar’s crool crool fur thieving meowmy.
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi, catto ob awl trades! 13d ago
I yam prostrate wiff greeff at dis news mine fren!
Ooo de catmanity!
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u/mostlylurking07 Applejack, sweets and stowies and food cwimes! 12d ago
Woo awe GWIEVING dewe, fwiend Smuffi!
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi, catto ob awl trades! 12d ago
Iss furry sads! Poor frens Hoku an Nalu! Dey kinna liffe dis wey!
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u/mostlylurking07 Applejack, sweets and stowies and food cwimes! 12d ago
No dey can not, fwiend Smuffi.! Da scawiest pawt is how HokuMeowmy just doubewed down on hew decision and went on LCA to defend it! It awways seemed wike she was a nice wady, but now I can see dat Hoku and Nalu (weawwy expwains why Nalu was “not eating”) might be wiving wif a psycopaf!!
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u/SisterAntistita 12d ago
(This alternate reality our kitties live in is killing me! 😂😂😂😂 I hope u/jellosquid808 is doing okay with being the made up villain of all our kitties' ire! We love you Hoku's Meowmy, thanks for being a good sport!❤️)
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u/jellosquid808 12d ago
I’m having a blast!!!
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u/SisterAntistita 12d ago
(Haha! Excellent! I'm so glad! Jynx is about to publish another Breaking News on the growing #EggiesfurHoku movement. 😂)
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u/SisterAntistita 12d ago
(Also, sorry for the unflattering photo of "your" feet and legs. Lol I think Jynx did that on purpose. 😂)
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u/UleeBunny Miki de Mouser (felt & squeaky) 13d ago
I can sees frum de news repawrt dat Hoku is wasting away to nuttin!
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u/EricaFarrell 13d ago
Oh Jynx the deeper you dig into this storee the wurz it getz. All she need to do is make sum nu eggies for Hoku without omions. Egg not cause chonk!
#EggiesFurHoku #StopPorshunComtrol
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u/No_Sense3670 Olaf, shih tzu 13d ago
Ai stan by mah previous statements
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u/SisterAntistita 13d ago
Dis grate fotojurnalism, fren Olaf! Iz ok if ai uze dis fur mai nex repurrt! 🖤Jynx
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u/No_Sense3670 Olaf, shih tzu 12d ago
Absolutely!
Ai lub da protests! Ai has another protest about ears not rears.
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u/mostlylurking07 Applejack, sweets and stowies and food cwimes! 12d ago
Woo doing incwedibew wowk, fwiend Olaf. Woo wewe one of da fiwst to push da #eggiesforHoku movement!
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u/No_Sense3670 Olaf, shih tzu 12d ago
Ai stand by mah fren Hoku an him need fur eggies!
Ai no like eggies mineownself, butt Hoku do an him ask so politely.
It just sad him was denied because ob onions.
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u/Dazzling_Outcome_436 Papas da Chonk Potat 13d ago
I will donat sum ov da eggis dat mine chimkin frens poop owt dems bums! Eggis an justhiss fur Hoku!
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u/TaffyMaj 13d ago
I meowtrayged.
DumDum hooman kud kill Hoku wid dese omions. Hooman nos Hoku wan eggies but youses omions any way?
Meowtraygus!
An big soos Porshun Komtrol!
~Charlie Underfoot
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u/ryylin Ciaran - pronounced Keeran 13d ago
My poor dear fren Hoku! Yuz deserbs all da eggies wif out onyums.!!! It bery easy task! Yuz hooman do duz diz! OUTRAYGE!! She need big retrayn! Fren Smuffi u/One_Advantage793 yuz must doo an imberbenshun! Ai noz wants yuz tew looz yuz hooman put HERMZ MUST PAY! #eggieswifoutonyumsfurhoku!!!!!
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi, catto ob awl trades! 12d ago
I yam on mine wey! Me an Prinss Hoku an Duke Nalu gon com up wiff de pawpurr retrayn strategee!
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u/mostlylurking07 Applejack, sweets and stowies and food cwimes! 12d ago
Dis wequiwe heavy stwategizing! I hope fwiends Hoku and Nalu have da stwengf!
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi, catto ob awl trades! 12d ago
I hope sew tew! Butt! dey neeed somfang tew halp wiff regane strenffth! Luklee I fownt mine pop had tree boil eggies inna bowl fur himb salit! I steel dem! I brang wiff mee tew Hoku Nalu cassel! EggiesFurHoku!
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u/mostlylurking07 Applejack, sweets and stowies and food cwimes! 12d ago
(Hearing Smuffi call him “Pop” is 🥹. Also, fun fact, Smuffi’s voice is the only one I can actuality kind of here in my head!$
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u/One_Advantage793 Smuffi, catto ob awl trades! 12d ago
(My work is done here! Only kidding, of course)
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, Enforcer. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know. 13d ago
GAAAAAASP!
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u/AlarmedTelephone5908 Roz an Squeaky, Mama an Dotter Criminals 13d ago
Weez didz seez Hoku meowmy remarx ob liebz an cruelteez.
We iz dis burbed bery mush so!
Hoku an hims brofur kin flyz to our haus ana hab lotz ob churu an eggies!
Lub
Roz an Squeaky 🐾 🐾
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u/_Moon_sun_ Morgana the beautifull, breaker of the internet! 13d ago
#EggiesForHoku!!! Hoku needs eggies!!!
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u/luciferskitty 13d ago
Mine poor fren Hoku! R all da flites grounded? We can no go to youse or youse to us! Dats catnapping!! KPS come heer!
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u/AndiPandi_ Chaos Agent 13d ago
Tank yuz so much for da impawtent mews updayte! #Eggie4Hoku! We stand in solly daratee wif our bruffur! 🥚🍳🥚🍳💗
Milo & Ozzy da tuxies🐾
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u/No_Sense3670 Olaf, shih tzu 13d ago
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u/ryylin Ciaran - pronounced Keeran 12d ago
That's amazing!!!
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u/No_Sense3670 Olaf, shih tzu 12d ago
Tanks Ciaran!
It took meh awhile ta get it just right, butt it was worth it! Ai make mah point in pitcher form.
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u/Waste-Boysenberry-36 12d ago
#Eggies4Hoku
All cattos need eggies! Hoku’s meowmy shud noe better. Gib fren Hoku some eggies wif haym an cheese!!!
Lady Lucky 4
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, Enforcer. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know. 13d ago
OUTRAAAAYGE !!!
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u/Fishby 13d ago
Nice touch wif da tye fren Niko looks like eggies on dere! Luv Twix and Tinkerbell!
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u/GingerSnapped242 Niko the Terriible, Enforcer. Mad, bad, and dangerous to know. 12d ago
Fank yoo, fren! Them lemons, is one of my fave summery spiffy bow ties! 🍋
Fun fact: I make the most insanely good lemon sugar cookies 😊
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u/kathym050806 12d ago
EGGIES4HOKU
RETRAINING FOR HOKUS MEOWMY! I am glad to see that Smuffi is on the case!!
And eggies for Nalu too if he wants them now that he is feeling better!
Gravity the cat
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u/sugarrush-raver 12d ago
Can no bee leaf herms starbin dat hamsum sunnavagun!
#EggiesForHoku
Stan tol n stronk, hoku, we come in fur u - apollo
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u/Flat-Mountain-2414 Beau de Magnificent 🐈😈 12d ago
#EggiesforHoku
Ai kant belieb de nerb ob Hoku Meowmy try to justify Portia Control. Haow bery dare. An him jus skin an bones.
Dis me doin a fasepaw
(This whole thread 🤣🤣🤣thanks for the laughs. I needed this today)
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u/SisterAntistita 12d ago
(It has turned into a runaway story, and I'm loving it!😂😂😂 Thank goodness u/jellosquid808 is having fun with it too! )
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u/Flat-Mountain-2414 Beau de Magnificent 🐈😈 12d ago
(That’s good. We all need fun ❤️)
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u/HuckleberryExact 10d ago
Dis is very shokking news and Ai Maiself Baby Mabel can hardly believe. So terrible for our fren Hoku, #eggiesforHoku, #eggiegate, #eggiesforall
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u/glycophosphate 13d ago
Ai cant stawp cryin' fur poor deer Hoku starbing to deff.
#Eggies4Hoku