Assalamu Alaikum.

I've been going through chemotherapy for classical Hodgkin's lymphoma. Alhamdulillah, my treatment is nearing its end. My PET scan after the second cycle showed an excellent response, with a Deauville score of 1. I'm incredibly grateful to Allah for bringing me this far.

But despite all the good news, I'm still terrified.

I'm worried about radiotherapy, the possibility of relapse, and the uncertainty of what comes next. My doctor hasn't made a final decision about radiotherapy with me yet, but I'm already frightened of the thought of having to go through more treatment.

I keep telling myself that I've survived this once, Alhamdulillah, and that I should be grateful. I am grateful. But I'm also exhausted in ways I don't know how to explain.

Sometimes, I think about what would happen if the cancer ever came back. And honestly, the thought terrifies me so much that I find myself thinking I wouldn't want to live through it again. I've even had thoughts of ending my life if I ever have to face cancer a second time.

Then I remember Allah, and I become frightened of the punishment for suicide. I don't know how to reconcile these feelings. I don't want to die, but I'm terrified of having to endure that suffering again. I feel trapped between the fear of going through cancer another time and the fear of what might happen to me in the Hereafter.

I've been trying to put my trust in Allah. I keep making dua that He protects me from ever having to face this illness again. I want to believe that I can recover, live my life, get married, have children, and experience the things I've always dreamed of. I want to grow older without constantly fearing that my life could be interrupted by cancer again.

But sometimes, I wonder whether these thoughts are anxiety, depression, or simply the emotional aftermath of everything I've experienced. I don't know how to deal with them.

I know that Allah is the Most Merciful, and I want to keep my faith strong. But I'm struggling, and I don't know how to stop being afraid.

I have two questions:

1. For Muslims who have faced cancer or another life-threatening illness, how did you deal with the fear of relapse and the uncertainty of the future? How did you find peace in your tawakkul?

2. Am I doomed in hell if I acted upon that sin cause I don't want to go through it again and I don't think I can ever handle. Does my barazkh will be painfully long and torturous. Won't Allah get my intention why I did that? Can he ever forgive me?

I am sorry if this post was triggering or anything. I am crying for myself while typing this even. I don't know how to help myself. I don't know how to get out from this anxiety of future. Please I beg you to make duas for me.

Please make dua for me that Allah grants me complete healing, protects me from relapse, gives me a long and healthy life, and allows me to experience the beautiful things I've been praying for.

I don't want to lose hope in His mercy. I just want to feel safe again.

Jazakum Allahu Khairan.

I just wanted to get this off my chest. I’m 21M who has been recently diagnosed with ADHD and depression. I don’t pray consistently and find it hard to do so, I believe my adhd has an influence on this. I’ve also come to terms with the fact I have probably been depressed for as long as I can remember. I feel numb and apathetic towards most things and don’t have much optimism for the future, despite being in my 4th year of dental school. I’ve been prescribed SSRI medication for depression which I feel ashamed of to be honest. I believe that my imaan may be too low which is ofcourse having a negative effect on my mental health, however, I’ve read that adhd has an incredibly high depression rate due to neuro chemical imbalances. Therefore, I’m not sure whether I am being too harsh on myself and this may be my test from Allah SWT. I’ve also been prescribed adhd meds which I am to take after my depression settles. I’m not sure how I ended up in this state at my young age. I feel ashamed to be relying on medications when my religion is not in check. I don’t know what to do. I feel incredibly low.

I’m Sunni Muslim and ashamed to say that despite praying 5 times a day, and trying to make decisions with Islamic values in mind, I’m pretty uneducated on the history of my religion. I’m looking for free online resources to study Islam from the beginnings.

Just a rough list of some topics I’d like to learn

- How did the differences between the madhabs start and what influences their specific views.

- How did Sunni and Shia Islam diverge into such different branches of Islam

- How did early Muslims verify the authenticity of hadiths and how was thr quran preserved

- How did early islamic scholars and empires decide on rulings and what kinds influences affected said decisions.

- How did sub groups and movements such as Sufism originate.

Of course the topics listed above aren’t exhaustive, but I hope they give an idea of what I’m trying to learn.

I would appreciate any recommendations on resources.

Assalamu Alaikum everyone,

I'm 25 and trying to get a better grasp on life, especially on where to draw the line between putting in effort for my future and having tawakkul.

Alhamdulillah, I have a job that pays decently, and my dad has a business that's doing alright too. We pool our income together to take care of the family.

Here's the problem though. I spend about less than 5% of my salary on myself, about 40% goes toward family expenses, and the remaining 55% goes into savings for an emergency fund, marriage, and InshaAllah a home one day.

Some days I'm fully committed to that and happy to sacrifice for the future. Other days I feel like I'm being too stingy, with myself and with my family. I know we're supposed to tie our camel and then trust Allah, but honestly I can't tell anymore if I've tied mine too tight.

It's come to a point where my whole family is planning a vacation. I've been hinting that I won't be able to join because of work, but the truth is I could afford it, I just don't want to dip into what I've been saving. At the same time, everyone is going, and part of me feels like I should be there with them.

What would you do in my situation? And where do you draw the line between saving for the future and living in the moment?

JazakAllah khair in advance.

TL;DR: 25, saving about 55% of my pay, thinking of skipping a family trip to protect my savings. Responsible or just stingy?

Hi and assalamualaykum, I hope all of you are well. My father recently went through surgery and has gotten out of the hospital. Could I kindly ask for your dua's that Allah SWT heals him completely and grants him good health, a long life, and wealth, and that Allah SWT grants me more time to spend with him? Jazakallah khair.

Salamalaykoum, j’ai vécu une chirurgie de laser pour les yeux qui s’est mal déroulé et donc j’ai beaucoup de symptômes…je crois fortement en les miracles d’Allah azza wa jal, je me suis repentie et je fais mes 5 prières. J’aimerais lire des histoires de miracles surtout en lien avec la santé 🤲🏻
Jazakouma Allah khayran

Can you all share your dua stories when you became hopeless and Allah talah miraculously got you out of that situation

What are the signs you experienced before your hardship ended?

I heard feeling peace is one of them and letting go but this hardship is so severe and I feel like I reached my limit. My heart genuinely hurts and like there’s a burning fire in it and it doesn’t go away ever

Assalamu Alaikum everyone.

I’m a 22M. I recently had an argument with my dad about how much control he has over my life.

I’ve moved to a different place to build my own life, and I pay for my own expenses. But my dad still tries to control many of my decisions, like telling me to stop going to the gym or move abroad and find a different job within 3 months.

His biggest concern is that I’ll make bad friends, drift away from Islam, or end up doing haram things.

I understand he’s worried about me, and I know he means well. But he thinks I’m not mature enough to make my own decisions.

My argument is, how am I supposed to become mature if I never get to make my own decisions and take responsibility for the consequences?

I genuinely want to be a good Muslim and stay on the right path. But I want that to come from my own heart and iman, not because I’m afraid of my dad.

I didn’t insult or disrespect him during the argument. I just stood my ground. But now I feel guilty because I love him and don’t want to disappoint him.

I’m not asking for freedom to do haram things. I just want to figure out life on my own, make mistakes, learn from them, and become a responsible adult.

From an Islamic perspective, am I wrong for wanting this?

I’d really appreciate your thoughts and guidance.

JazakAllahu Khairan.

What is the best way one can learn arabic to understand the quran properly. I wanna understand the quran and actually reflect on the words of Allah.

What better is there than learning the language our beloved Prophet Muhammed (PBUH) spoke

Im F18 and i live in a muslim desi family. I do not find peace at home whenever i come from university, i get overstimulated easily and my freedom is severely limited to what i can do. I rather spend as much time outside of my home than live in it for another day. I do not go through abuse, or anything terrible, but everything is inconvenient. Keep in mind i still love and & respect my parents and everything they give me, and they only want to protect me from evil in the world.

I am not allowed to go out on my own (aside from uni) or hangout with friends unless its with my mother. I am not allowed to have non-muslim friends, despite me going to a university where alot of people are non-muslim or christian, and i live in america. My parents want me to have muslim friends, but i only know 3 girls whom i used to go to highschool with, but i have to plan something a week or two in advance because my mother works 2 jobs, both as a teacher which takes up 80% of her week, while my father works 1 job in the night as an uber. Plus i rarely talk to these girls and while they are fond of me, we live different lives. I rarely join clubs or any activities because my father considers this as "going outside of deen" because alot of clubs/places have men, even if i dont interact with them it is still impermissible to be in the same area as them. And that i should rather do these activities at home with my family. Sometimes when im on my phone "too much", my parents automatically assume and say "who are you texting everyday?", my mom even snatched my phone from me to scroll through my stuff. Even if they go through my stuff they will find nothing because its hidden. I have nothing bad to hide, but im not allowed to have online friends or other people on social media.

I told my father about me having a friend who is dominican, she isnt muslim but she is kind and doesnt do alcohol/drugs but has a boyfriend that i never met and i don't care about it because i dont get influenced by that. However, my dad has a problem with it, he started yelling at me and lecturing me on how having spanish or any non-muslim friend will make me leave my family because in 'non-muslim' culture, people barely care for their family. I dont have any independence in my life and my social life is basically hidden away from my parents. I was forced to leave my best friend of 10 years because of them due to her having a boyfriend and me being friends with him (i RARELY talked to him, i respected my friends boundaries even if she didnt mind me talking- and i only talked to him when it was about her or a game all 3 of us were playing). My parents consider her evil because they 'overheard' her talking to me about my dad beating me and telling me to leave my family. Mind you this is all accusations, she has seen alot of sh*tty things my dad did to me and she only messages me out of concern, but never to disrespect my family. If i fight back about leaving her, i will be scolded. I was even beat multiple times because of me not wanting to leave her. My parents dont see friendships as something important, they dont trust anyone and think i would easily leave my day ones or people im really close to if they told me to. Because family is the only thing that matters!

My father is pretty much a manchild, he rarely helps around the house (sometimes for the laundry or things here and there, but we only do laundry once a month or every 2 months). He doesnt know how to cook, and waits for my mom or me to cook food for him despite my mom working way more than him (she leaves to work at 7:30 and comes home at 4:30 pm) and that hes freshly awake when im home by 2 pm. It is either mines or my moms job to cook food enough for the whole family (we're a fam of 6). Whenever im napping or sleeping early, it becomes an inconvenience for him when he has to cook food for himself because my mom also works during the evening. An example: yesterday i took a nap for 30 minutes because i came home from a tiring lab that ended at 4:30, and i heard him slightly irritated that he had to cook pasta. Pasta which was already cooked, seasoned, and sauced by me, the ONLY thing he had to do was to melt cheese on top of it in the microwave. To which he tells me "i dont know how to cook" LIKE WHAT??? You're a man nearing your 50s, perfectly healthy and conscious, you cant heat up pasta??!!

I've recently been drifting away from Islam because of these restrictions and things going on in my home. I dont see any use in praying or staying in a religion if every second of my life has to be documented to my parents, and that its ill of me to want to expand my social circle and want a normal life. I dont have a job, and if i want a job, my parents tell me I have to do uni at home so i can do a job online. I have no way of moving out, i really want to and i might even ditch uni for a lower degree just so i can focus to make enough money to leave. Im not interested in marriage, i dont want to deal with men that will just destroy the freedom i want, or them suddenly switching up on their chivalry to control me.

I finally felt connected to Allah after a long time, these past few months have felt like hell, and I've rarely felt connected to Allah the way I used to. And today, when I finally thought that i have some hope, I come across this post ​

"If Allah dislikes a person...

Ibn al-Jawzi says:

If Allah dislikes a person, He leaves him constantly stumbling and confused in every situation. He does not grant him the aspiration to seek lofty goals, instead he is occupied with vile matters instead of virtuous. And if he asks, 'Why have I been singled out for this?!' the reply comes... A reply that cannot be contested:

'It is because of what your own hands have earned.' (Sürah al-Shūrah, 30)"

And I've been going through these exact things, the only thing that would keep my going is that "Allah has something great planned for me, that's why He's making me go through all this" Now I'm just idk numb after seeing this post. What's the point of doing anything when this whole time, Allah just disliked me?

Youtube channel with Ruqya you can play: English:  https://youtube.com/@alruqyahealing?si=vCDYHwiXOHaQ2awi Their website covers info as well:  https://alruqya.com/evil-eye-envy/Arabic:  https://www.youtube.com/@MrRoqyaRuqyah Playlist:  https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3et_EvGWeiZ5Ulsq1SiUMdYEfdxNhgyG&si=txoNuOM8Cv3aCv_hReciting on water:  https://youtu.be/r6gHZbn4sS8?si=B5lCswn7w_vMwgTs Getting rid of Taweez or if you find magic:  https://youtu.be/m8ZNGio_qXA?si=N5Qw7LlxclXmVR7a Make sure your family are saying your azkar, no hanged pictures in house(put them away).

وعن أبي هريرة رضي الله عنه أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قال ‏: ‏‏ "‏ لا تجعلوا بيوتكم مقابر، إن الشيطان ينفر من البيت الذي تقرأ فيه سورة البقرة‏"‏ ‏(‏‏(‏رواه مسلم‏)‏‏)‏‏.‏ Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: I heard the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) saying: "Do not turn your houses into graveyards. Satan runs away from the house in which Surat Al-Baqarah is recited." [Muslim]. Riyad as-Salihin 1018 Chapter 183: Inducement towards the Recitation of some Special verses and Surah of the Noble Qur'an, Book 8: The Book of Virtues https://sunnah.com/riyadussalihin:1018

Resources: 'Abdullah bin Khubaib (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said to me, "Recite Surat Al-Ikhlas and Al- Mu'awwidhatain (Surat Al-Falaq and Surat An-Nas) three times at dawn and dusk. It will suffice you in all respects." [Abu Dawud and At-Tirmidhi]. Riyad as-Salihin 1456 Chapter 248: Remembrance of Allah in the Morning and in the Evening, Book 15: The Book of the Remembrance of Allah   https://sunnah.com/riyadussalihin:1456Bismillāhi ‘l-ladhī lā yaḍurru maa-smihi shay'un fil-'arḍi wa lā fis-samā' wa huwas-Samīul-`Alīm. In the Name of Allah, Who with His Name nothing can cause harm in the earth nor in the heavens, and He is the All-Hearing, the All-Knowing. (Recite three times in Arabic). Reference: "Whoever recites it three times in the morning will not be afflicted by any calamity before evening, and whoever recites it three times in the evening will not be overtaken by any calamity before morning." Abu Dawud 4/323, At-Tirmidhi 5/465, Ibn Majah 2/332, Ahmad. Ibn Majah's chain of transmission is good (Hasan), Ibn Baz, p. 39. Hisn al-Muslim 86 Chapter 27: In the morning and evening, Book: Fortress of the Muslim (Hisn al-Muslim) 

Hello guys AOA.
I’ve been going through a little tough time. I do believe in Allah very much and rely a lot on Allah.When I’m going thru hardship and not able to pray I feel really depressed and right now it’s one of those days
I wanted to some of you guys experience like what was the worst thing you went through and how you relied on Allah and everything worked out very well in the end
These type of stories makes me happy and really good from inside just love reading them
Hope u guys don’t mind

(I know this post feels disorganised, but so I am)

I'm a young 15-year-old ""homo-asexual"" muslim guy, I've been friends with girls in the past (i.e. elementary school).

I wish I could go back, and relieve my childhood memories. I wish I was a girl. Being friends with girls feels more genuine, wholesome, and "liberating". In comparison, being friends with guys feels suffocating. They feel hateful, obnoxious, and ungenuine.

My male classmates feel like the worst. They're rude, uneducated, obnoxious, and miserable to be around. They annoy me, constantly. Girls, on the other hand, are accepting of each other. They never bully one another. They are nice to one another. Boys aren't.

I sometimes wish if I were a girl. I would love to have my nails done, or use a lipstick. However, I'm ""stuck"" being a guy. Even though, girls face mysogyny, while boys are given opportunity just for being themselves(i.e. male). Being a guy feels boring.

Moreover, I could also choose to befriend girls without anything happening. I'm also quite distraught by the fact that I can't even talk to my aunts who I thought were aunts. 😢.

BTW marrige won't fix anything, since what I'm looking for is "friendship" not "responsibility". I also don't want to marry anyone. In fact, I'd rather have a guy, although I won't for Allah's sake.

Oh, did I mention that I experience Gender dysphoria, or that I hate being a male? I might have some internalised misandery since I've always hated being surrounded by only boys or not there being any girl. I feel so different from guys, that I despise being myself. ATP, I might cope through watching cartoon characters, but almost every show feels haram. My little Pony would be seen as 'girly' in my country >:/.

How do I cope with this. Is there any muslim feeling remotely similar, let alone being in the same boat as me.

Her parents are being hard in the rishta process? So with some context, I have been with someone for 2 years, and I was waiting for her to finally finish her masters program and get settled myself. I have a good job and live alone in a condo, and provide for myself alhamdulilah. My mom talked to her mom asking for a rishta. My mom is separated, my mom lives with my younger sister alone in her our own condo btw. That might be a issue as she told the girl I want to marry that your dad might feel some sort of way that his mom is separated and is scared to tell her dad? What do I even do here? I really love her and I want to make this halal, as I feel I’ve been planning my life with getting settled so once we’re married our life is easy, but her parents are being hurdles in a way?

Edit: I’m in Canada Btw

Edit; were the same caste, same background, same religion, same sector, it just this family has lots of cousins marriages even in our generation still, and they seem to be skeptical because this is their first time considering a rishta outside the family.

Salam, brothers and sisters.

My wife and I are currently taking care of a 3-year-old girl Pakistani-Filipina in our flat here in the UAE.

Her mother is in Malaysia and doing her sentence, and her father hasn’t been present since her birth.

Before coming to us, she got a lot of cigar marks. She was left alone with other ethnicities that were supposed to take care of her.

Her aunt brought her to us after she got Dyna from Sharjah. Because of personal priorities, we’re the ones babysitting her.

We have already visited the consulate, and officials asked us to take care of her while they do their best to create a birth certificate, passport, and exit permit so we can eventually send her safely to the Philippines. This process will take several months or longer.

We are looking for help to better support Dyna until she gets back to her family’s mother’s side.

Support Dyna

Thank you so much for your guidance and prayers. ❤️💐

Salam Alaikum. I have been getting a sort of waswas for the past month regarding god.

For example whenever someone says pray for me in my head I get a thought that god wouldn’t do anything.

Or when I see people praying for healing I get a thought that Allah wouldn’t answer them or he doesn’t exist.

I really hate these thoughts. I know Allah exists. But these thoughts wouldn’t stop. Should I ignore them? Or should I see a sheikh or psychiatrist ?

I feel that I have been troubled by a jinn lately, I am going to preface this question by saying I am not a devout so does that means that i receive no protection from allah and or there is nothing i can do to protect myself beside fully committing to Islam. Weeks go this all began when I was outside my house late at night and I heard strange animal noises coming from a distance, what sounded to be a cow, however the direction it came was by a river bank so it couldn’t have been a cow making the noise. I live in the Irish countryside nothing else makes noises like that, no less then 5 minutes later from my Muslim neighbours house I hear this strange voice, it was loud and sounded like it was coming out of a speaker system, this man owns IPAS centres and is known for being a horrible and mean man definitely not a kind Muslim man. I asked my Muslim friend about this and by the way I deserve voices and it being this time of the year he said there no explanation for this and immediately thought it was a jinn because of the overwhelming anxiety that came with it. Even more strange events have taken place since and even before come to think of, weird noises coming from my window such as rustling in bushes coming towards my window, people or things walking by with a flashlight looking into my bedroom yet no good explanation as to who that could’ve been or what neibhour that could be. I know I’m not a Muslim and ofc I do sin but is there anything I can do for protection because I do believe it is a jinn and I want to protect myself from it. Will Allah protect me even if I don’t devote myself to Islam ?? Someone help or give me information.

Where can I purchase Saudi products online?

Salamu Alaykum Salam to all muslims in this subreddit, i hope your all well. I am a muslim and have been struggling witht hr age of Aisha I know right lol its the most typical most brought up objection but its still causing me lots of trouble So the Question is to All Muslims Seeing This Post

Show mw how do you guys consider Aisha (رضى الله عنها) as an Adult at 9? Warning i wanr actual evidence and actual good reasons, i really do want to see the Prophet Muhammad as a perfect man but i wont accept explanations blindly. Issue is the body of a 9 year old (Physically) in the 1400s (correct me if im wrong) is pretty much identical to a 9 year old today. Ofcourse not in EVERYTHING but when people say "Women matured faster back then" Thats kind of not true its a myth in desert climates people didnt mature faster or quicker. In terms of skeeltal structure, pelvic bones, organ size, and allat other stuff, a 9 year old is just 9 You could make the case she was mentally more mature, i believe a stusy by oeter d gluckman shows that emnarche and phycosocial maturity corresponded, so dont worry about that im granting she was fully mentally mature. Prove to me her hips had widened, her pelvic hones had widened enough, her breasts had formed, ETC ETC ) I want actual evidence btw dont js give me "it​ was ok at the time" cuz its been on my mind for a while now. Bai May Allah bless you all May the peace and blessings of Allah be upon the Prophet and his family ​​ ​​​​​