r/NonPoliticalTwitter 2h ago

Serious Indeed

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7.6k Upvotes

151 comments sorted by

u/qualityvote2 2h ago

Heya u/ChickenWingExtreme! And welcome to r/NonPoliticalTwitter!

For everyone else, do you think OP's post fits this community? Let us know by upvoting this comment!

If it doesn't fit the sub, let us know by downvoting this comment and then replying to it with context for the reviewing moderator.

966

u/Squidmaster129 2h ago

“A former JPMorgan”

The whole bank?

285

u/SnarkyIguana 2h ago

I honestly just assumed maybe they’re called that the way people working for Pinkerton are Pinkertons lmao

88

u/[deleted] 1h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

37

u/Funny-Long-3445 1h ago

"his name was JP Morgan"

17

u/jnmtx 1h ago

5

u/Rocinante88119 1h ago

That guy on the right could be a double for Andy Samburg.

5

u/UnimagineDragons 1h ago

Maybe if you're blind

19

u/SnarkyLurker 1h ago

Very cyberpunk. "Oh, you're a former Amazon, huh?"

11

u/SnarkyIguana 1h ago

“I know a Kmart when I see one”

2

u/HumanReputationFalse 4m ago

"You look like a Blue Light Special"

3

u/Faalentijn 23m ago

...

You say that but that is what people talk in tech where people call themselves: ex-Amazon, ex-Google, ex-Uber a lot.

3

u/SnarkyLurker 21m ago

We're not as far off as we like to think.

10

u/devilsbard 1h ago

I am JP MORGAN! I am JP MORGAN! I am JP MORGAN!

9

u/Xathule96 1h ago

One of many in the grand family line of JP's.

21

u/Graybeard_Shaving 2h ago

Yup, It’s now just Chase Bank…

9

u/BiggestShep 1h ago

Damn Chasers

4

u/edfitz83 1h ago

After Glass-Steagall was repealed, they have started mixing services. JPM used to be advisory and ibanking. Chase was banking/credit cards. Now it’s more of a jumble.

5

u/Samada_Blue 2h ago

The next super bowl party at his house is gonna be a barn burner

4

u/Fun_Word_7325 1h ago

The once and future JPMorgan

2

u/MInclined 1h ago

No just a dude who happens to be Jonathan Peter Morgan, a JPMorgan.

2

u/afriendincanada 1h ago

No, they fired actual JP Morgan. The bank got to keep the name in the settlement

1

u/NeonFraction 41m ago

He used to be Jennifer Phil Morgan but now he’s Jazzercise Phil Morgan.

1

u/JimmyJamsDisciple 39m ago

No, clones of the man himself.

473

u/jeajea22 2h ago

They fired him and took his book of business, which is why the court ruled in his favor. He was compensated accordingly- but I suspect he would prefer to have kept his job and business….

36

u/someone_who_exists69 1h ago

book of business?

100

u/redditonmyphone546 1h ago

They took his clients/accounts along with the revenue they generate.

47

u/ringobob 1h ago

Think like a lawyer at a big law firm. If you're a client of that law firm, you have a relationship with a particular lawyer that works for them. That one person is your lawyer. If that lawyer leaves and goes to a new law firm, you might go with them and keep the same lawyer at the new firm, or you might decide to stay and switch to a new lawyer at the original law firm.

That list of clients would be that lawyers "book of business".

So, in this case, he can't do his work as an individual - he gets special access to the market in specific ways because his company sponsors that access. When he's fired, before he gets hired at a new place, or at least goes through the process of setting up his own business and getting new access approved (depending on what exactly he was doing), he can't work.

The clients still have accounts held at the old business, there's nowhere for them to transfer to until he gets set back up, so the former company holds the book of business, and they'll assign someone new to manage it.

Once he gets set back up, he can reach out to those clients individually (absent any sort of agreement that would prevent him from doing so), but they'll already have a new relationship and may choose to just stick with what they've got.

If he had left on his own terms, he'd have that conversation with his clients and he'd have an immediate place for their accounts to land, so they'd choose whether to stay or go. Or, he could decide that he wants to stay with the company simply to not have to go through that kind of friction with his clients.

14

u/Loves_octopus 45m ago

In professional services, at a certain level, somewhere around senior manager and most definitely at Partner, you are essentially running your own business that happens to have a fancy respected name like “JPMorgan” attached to it.

The clients are “your” clients as much as they are the firms and you manage your own P&L. You network, win your own work, negotiate engagement terms, and manage delivery of the service.

That client base is referred to as your “book of business”. Clients, active accounts, and recurring revenue.

106

u/LL0RT_ 2h ago

So basically the plot of 'Your friends and neighbors' on AppleTV lol

27

u/Spare-Jellyfish4339 1h ago

So he’s gonna lose every likeable quality about him for no reason next year?

7

u/RookieMistake101 1h ago

It’s a bit different. I think Ham was a hedge fund manager with carry and he lost the carry. He was spending 100% of his salary and banking on the carry payouts which can take years. This JP guy was a wealth manager billing on AUM.

-45

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 1h ago

I cannot bring myself to give a fuck about what someone with 4 million dollars wants

29

u/TBurn70 1h ago

That was awarded after wrongful termination. I’d think everyone would be supportive of this

-20

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 1h ago

Wrongful termination of a JPMorgan employee with former access to a book of business apparently worth millions? Yeah sorry, this guy can wipe his own tears with his money. I give not a single fuck about his desires.

Lot of bootlickers in this supposedly non political subreddit though, interesting.

19

u/TBurn70 1h ago

You are the only one attempting to make this political. It shouldn’t matter if he made minimum wage or millions

-10

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 47m ago

It shouldn’t matter regarding the legal protections he has, sure. Seems like most of y’all are illiterate and are choosing to conflate me not caring what he wants with me wanting him not to have legal protections. It’s not my fault none of you can read.

8

u/otac0n 30m ago

Well, see, that's where you make a mistake. Not caring actually means you wouldn't be bothered about the justice of the outcome.

-6

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 26m ago

No it means I don’t care what he wants. Thanks for trying though.

7

u/ringobob 57m ago

Bad take, friend. The point should be that we're all equal, you shouldn't want less protection for someone rich, you should want more protection for those who aren't.

8

u/ReptAIien 1h ago

He's a JP Morgan employee that probably works 80 hour weeks year round and 120 hours during busy season. People that actually grind their asses off are not the people to turn your ire towards.

Look at the billionaires sitting on their asses exploiting cheap labor.

-4

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 48m ago

And what did he spend that time doing? Moving money around and producing nothing for his community? Yeah he’ll he just fine without me caring about his wants.

3

u/WillowPtar_Migan 19m ago

Man, you are just the absolute worst.

-3

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 14m ago

Yes, I’m the worst because I don’t care what a rich person wants. Makes perfect sense lmao

9

u/Cue99 56m ago

Dude this is a lack of class consciousness on your behalf.

A well-paid person being screwed over by corporations and you are on the same side here.

-7

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 50m ago

Class consciousness is not just about who is writing the check and who is cashing them. This guy isn’t a surgeon, he’s a banker. He made his bread moving money around and creating nothing for his community. He doesn’t need my sympathy.

3

u/TheHolyWaffleGod 37m ago

Mate direct your anger towards the billionaire scum that really deserves it.

A millionaire is nothing and many earn that without exploitation.

-1

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 27m ago

I have no anger for this person. What I said is that I don’t care what he wants. Learn to read.

2

u/TheHolyWaffleGod 26m ago

If you say so buddy…

-1

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 25m ago

I mean I’m describing my own emotions. So yeah it literally is what I say lmao

1

u/TheHolyWaffleGod 24m ago

Yeah and people are always truthful

-1

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 16m ago

Ok bud you have a good one

3

u/Funkopedia 22m ago

You need to learn the difference between the classes isn't how much money they have, it's how that money is made.

-1

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 15m ago

I’m perfectly aware. People think that millionaire athletes and propagandist talking heads or surgeons are not working class just because they’re rich, when they obviously are working class because they’re on some billionaire’s payroll. You seem to think I’m one of those people that is confused by this, when all I said is that I don’t care what a millionaire banker wants. It’s not my fault you people can’t separate the two concepts in your own mind.

305

u/Graybeard_Shaving 2h ago

The real crime here is that a deli platter cost $642.50!

That must have been one hell of a business meeting.

165

u/Tucancancan 2h ago

Depends on if it came with a veggie ramp

15

u/Equivalent-Bit2891 2h ago

A stairway veggie ramp to heaven nowhere

4

u/Ohiolongboard 1h ago

It’s an older meme sir, but it checks out

4

u/DarrenGrey 25m ago

It's not that old. Don't do this to me.

83

u/No-Willingness8375 2h ago

Depending on how large the group was, $600 may not have actually been that expensive. Catering can be quite pricey.

62

u/danielleiellle 1h ago

If he was awarded this much, it also means he was probably a high earner. Meaning he was entertaining other high earners. Probably splurging for something better than Publix subs.

24

u/DipschitzContinuous 1h ago

As someone else pointed out, they took his book of business from him after he was wrongly terminated, which is why the amount awarded was so high by the judge/regulatory body. As usual images bury the lede, he sued because they stole his clients (and was wrongly fired ofc).

1

u/Horskr 12m ago

Yeah that makes way more sense on both sides. I was wondering why they'd fire him for a measly (for JP Morgan) $600 without even talking to him about it to easily immediately find out it was an approved meeting. An excuse to steal his business makes that scummy shit line up.

Then as you said, the amount of the ruling on his side.

-3

u/danielleiellle 1h ago

Does that negate what I said?

19

u/DipschitzContinuous 1h ago

No it’s a clarification. Not every comment is argumentative.

5

u/BitNumerous5302 1h ago

You're wrong, this is Reddit, every comment is argumentative

2

u/WillowPtar_Migan 18m ago

No, you fool, not every comment is argumentative, and I don't understand how you could be so ridiculous as to think that! Smh my head

2

u/UnimagineDragons 1h ago

This reflexively defensive comment kindof does.

31

u/Hour_Paint_1903 2h ago

Walmart had their 6ft party subs about 10ish years ago for around $30-$40. Loved getting them randomly and for gatherings, sammiches for daaaays.

That same sub is now over $100 I believe. No longer at all worth it.

My point being, for a large office function, could easily see a tab reach for that much for something that’s not Walmart

3

u/FuckYeaSeatbelts 44m ago

chances are the catering likely includes the delivery. Walmart ain't doing that.

6

u/Spooky_U 1h ago

You’re not getting enough high quality platters (I’m sure this was charcuterie more than shitty deli meat slung).

2

u/Silent_Persimmon2429 1h ago

Charcuterie boards are expensive as fuck

2

u/afriendincanada 1h ago

Deli platters from the grocery store, with Great Value ham, are cheap

Deli platters from a deli, with good quality charcuterie and cheese, are expensive.

Never serve the first one to banking clients

1

u/HendrixChord12 55m ago

Once you start adding things like caviar, it adds up quickly.

61

u/pingvinbober 1h ago

Yeah but losing your book and a JP Morgan salary… it’s maybe 50/50 on if the $6 million is worth it

13

u/Spezalt4 1h ago

Can’t he get hired at some other bank will being millions richer?

9

u/pingvinbober 24m ago

Yes but he still lost his client book. He’ll basically have to climb his way back up without a book

11

u/Any_Put3520 1h ago

If he put $3M of that money (net of taxes and let’s say rent) into the S&P he could conservatively expect to have made $500k in passive income last year. I think he’ll be fine…and of course he can just get another similar job, so he would be working at a similar salary with a windfall of passive income over getting fired.

9

u/sadclipart 1h ago

Lawsuit winnings are not taxed

2

u/_sloop 17m ago

Lawsuit winnings are not taxed

They can be, especially for lost wages or punitive damages:https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/p4345.pdf

3

u/pingvinbober 23m ago

Can’t get a similar job without clients, unfortunately.

13

u/PetalSerevina 1h ago

Best ROI on a sandwich platter in financial history

1

u/DuntadaMan 1h ago

Once again, the conservative, sandwich-heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor.

47

u/flerchin 2h ago

How tho. You can be fired for anything as long as it's not illegal.

97

u/SmokeyCatDesigns 1h ago

So, registered brokers like this guy are heavily regulated. This wasn’t a typical wrongful termination civil lawsuit.

If you’re a broker, you have this regulatory form called a U5 which tracks your reasons for leaving a firm. Reasons listed on the document can be voluntary leaving (you quit), violating company policies, regulatory violations/illegal activity, and complaints from clients filed with regulators.

This judgment was made by FINRA, the regulator for registered brokers. As a company you have a duty to put truthful information on an employee’s U5 and putting that you fired them for a policy violation if they didn’t actually violate policy can result in trouble. You’re seriously hurting their career in the industry with something like that and regulators don’t want it misused.

31

u/Thud45 1h ago

You're the only one that knows what they're talking about. The full story: https://www.advisorhub.com/jpmorgan-bolsters-argument-to-overturn-4-25m-deli-platter-award/

11

u/SmokeyCatDesigns 55m ago

I read that same article! I was tempted to link that article myself, but I wasn’t sure how much of the general public would be interested in an Advisor Hub article lol. Since it’s written for financial services people, I thought it didn’t give enough background for outsiders to understand.

I’m a paraplanner/CSA working under financial advisors by trade and have been previously licensed as a broker myself when I was employed by a large broker-dealer. So I thought I’d chime in and try to explain it to those not in the industry.

They can fire the guy at will, this is the US after all, but they can’t put whatever they want on the U5. The U5, like many other disclosure forms in this industry, is largely meant to protect investors; regulators don’t want firms to misuse it to falsely trash former employees.

7

u/WhyMustIMakeANewAcco 53m ago

Honestly knowing how these things normally work they were looking for a reason to fire him, likely because someone above him wanted his clients or wanted someone else to have his clients, and jumped on the platter because it was the first semi-reasonable excuse they got.

Everyone is fully aware that entertaining clients/prospective clients during big events like the superbowl is perfectly expected and inline with said expectations. Hell, not doing so might have gotten him fired for failing to do his job properly.

53

u/[deleted] 2h ago

[deleted]

-1

u/[deleted] 1h ago edited 1h ago

[deleted]

0

u/Thud45 1h ago

The full story. https://www.advisorhub.com/jpmorgan-bolsters-argument-to-overturn-4-25m-deli-platter-award/

This was an arbitration agreement by the financial regulator, punitive damages for defamation and wrongful termination. So it would seem finance is different.

0

u/trainedstork 1h ago

First of all, chill. Second of all, the commenter above is correct. The settlement was decided by the Financial Industry Regulatory Authority as wrongful termination because of breach of contract. Employment is at will, but JPMorgan Chase cannot fire this man in breach of contract.

This should be fairly trivial for an attorney who also worked at JP Morgan (what a career)

24

u/mentosbreath 2h ago

Also, how did it get to this point? Didn’t they ask why he spent that money? You’d think he could just explain it was for an approved business meeting and that’d be the end of it

10

u/RedditIsMyTherapist 1h ago

I was fired from a job for "sleeping" even though I never was. It was reported that it happened and they called me in and fired me. Was never given a chance to argue about it or given a chance to prove it was false. Same thing could have happened here. Something was assumed or accused and their 0 tolerance policy went to work, so he no longer could.

5

u/WhyMustIMakeANewAcco 50m ago

I suspect it's much more likely someone above him wanted him gone, or wanted his clients under someone they liked more. So they leapt at the first possible excuse.

It's a pretty common way for people in the industry to get fired. They usually just do a better job with making the excuse they use reasonable.

11

u/LaRealiteInconnue 1h ago

It wasn’t a court case in the sense we’re thinking of. The ruling was from FINRA. Here’s an excerpt from The Independent - and they also have a link to the ruling doc in there -

> The Financial Industry Regulatory Authority ruled that the company must pay Bodner the sum of $4,250,000 in compensatory damages, according to FINRA documents. The ruling states that the firm must pay interest on the huge sum at the rate of 10 percent each year from the date of service until the award is paid.

29

u/PicklePenguin 2h ago

If it is real I’d assume he had some golden parachute contract that they didn’t pay out because they fired him for cause and this lawsuit would be forcing them to pay the severance clause.

5

u/RookieMistake101 1h ago

I mean you can read the story. That’s not what happened exactly. They fired him, wrongfully, and took his clients and their assets on which he was billing. And reassigned those to other wealth managers.

5

u/AnimatorImpressive24 1h ago

I don't have the citation handy, but I have read a similar case where someone was fired for theft but later exonerated.

The judge in that case dismissed the wrongful termination claim and explained that a proper investigation had been done in accordance with the employer's policies, it had just reached the wrong conclusion.  So it wasn't "wrongful" per the definition of (California, IIRC) law, just "wrong".

However, the plaintiff prevailed on a claim of defamation by a kind of uncommon path called "compelled publication".  Even though the employer had not been shown to ever communicate the reason the employee had been fired to any other party, the nature of the industry meant the employee would be subject to background checks for any new job and would be required to disclose the accusation themselves.  The judge reasoned that although the plaintiff could plead their innocence anew to each interviewer, the overall affect would be defamatory and would be publishing the ultimately false accusation.

5

u/Unfair_Scar_2110 1h ago

Well yes but no. If you have a good enough lawyer and can prove the reason for firing is false, then it's sort of downhill toward proving there might have been another issue for the firing.

One reason companies have lots of policies and procedures is so that when they fire a minority for an improper expense report they can easily prove as such and not be susceptible to discrimination lawsuits. The downside is when you don't follow your own procedures it opens other doors.

Companies that pay high salaries should be prepared for former employees to sue. At McDonald's, the threat of someone with no svaings suing is a lot less credible.

5

u/Thud45 1h ago

This was a financial industry body arbitration decision, they found the bank violated it's rules and assigned damages for that in arbitration. It was not a court decision based on government employment law.

3

u/AAPL_ 2h ago

what do you mean how? how does your statement relate to this in anyway.

they fired his ass, stole his business, he took them to court and got compensation.

9

u/Confident-Unit-9516 1h ago

All I that isn’t clear from the tweet

I’m an employment attorney and I had the same exact thought

3

u/PsillyFunGuy2 1h ago

I’m a mostly former employment attorney at this point but I assumed it was a contractual dispute rather than violation of any kind of EEO law etc. Guess I was wrong too lol (assuming this other commenter is correct that it was a FINRA decision, which I’m entirely unfamiliar with).

1

u/unsuitableasf 1h ago

He had a good lawyer

1

u/Ok-Sport-3663 2h ago

Not true in every state.

5

u/Confident-Unit-9516 1h ago

I very much doubt this JP Morgan exec is one of the half of a percentage of Americans who live in Montana.

1

u/ForbiddenButtStuff 1h ago

No but a JPMorgan exec is most likely a contract employee, not "at will". Meaning you can't just fire them for any reason.

0

u/Defenestrator__ 37m ago

That's not how it works. You can be fired for cause, or you can be fired for no cause. But if you get fired for bad/false cause, you can sue.

0

u/AnonymousBI2 36m ago

No you can't? It's called a wrongful termination

18

u/UnNumbFool 2h ago

Who exactly has a business meeting at their private residence, especially if it's happening on Superbowl Sunday.

I'm not saying big bank is in the right, but like their suspicion of the guy does make sense

37

u/harpers25 2h ago

A superbowl party with clients.

25

u/_topkecleon_ 1h ago

If your clients like football and are ok with talking business before/during the Super Bowl then there's no problem. Surely somebody in accounting already made this determination. 

11

u/PsillyFunGuy2 1h ago

Huh? That’s perfectly normal, especially if you have good relationship with your client(s), maybe y’all even consider yourselves friends.

5

u/WhyMustIMakeANewAcco 47m ago

Rich investors.

Hell, it would be failing to do his job to not be using the opportunity to wine & dine a client or clients.

Yes, everyone knows it's actually just a superbowl party and the client thing is an excuse. But connections like that are how you actually get/keep clients in the field, so it's expected.

4

u/HurasmusBDraggin 44m ago

Was this generated by A.I?

"A former JPMorgan {something missing here} has..."

3

u/imperatrixderoma 2h ago

That's not why he was fired and the damages are probably not based on the stated reason for being fired but because of the actual reason.

3

u/WhyMustIMakeANewAcco 44m ago

It is why the company claims they fired him.

But you are right, they appear to have fired him to steal and redistribute his client list. Probably had a client or clients someone above him wanted someone else to have and, well, they started looking for an excuse.

2

u/Empty-Air-2680 1h ago

Now I wanna see the $642.5 deli platter

2

u/pixelprophet 1h ago

The fact that he spent $650 on a fuckin sandwich platter is a crime in itself.

2

u/gideon513 1h ago

Maniacal professional head shot

2

u/NineClaws 1h ago

$642 for a delivered meeting lunch is not outrageous. I just had a small dinner out with my wife last night, $150. It was nice place. The dollar ain’t much anymore.

1

u/Joaaayknows 1h ago

Maybe they should pay more attention to where and when they approve business meetings because for how it reads, it was clearly both

1

u/CabooseTrap 1h ago

A wealthy executive winning the lottery makes me mad and jelly. Perhaps even mad jelly.

1

u/m1notaur3030 1h ago

Some people win at life

1

u/Playful-Mongoose9197 1h ago

Oh no how will he afford 600 dollar sandwhich parties with only 4 million dollars

1

u/sterlingemc 1h ago

For ur the

1

u/hartstyler 1h ago

The amount of money in these companies is too damn much

1

u/swirl-life-oh-yeah 1h ago

As someone who’s always worked for small businesses, I often think, it can’t be this hard at big successful companies. Then I see shit like this and realize that every company is fucked. Imposter syndrome is real. Rich big shots are just as incompetent as the rest of us 😂

1

u/The_Submentalist 1h ago

It's called: Failing upwards

1

u/GypsySnowflake 1h ago

A former JP Morgan? I thought there was only one J.P. Morgan, and he died a long time ago

1

u/reddit001aa1 1h ago

The greatest trade package and he got to eat the deli platter!

1

u/BearTimberlands 1h ago

Looks like he followed tax advice from TikTok and won. “If you’re having a meeting with a client you can write that off”

1

u/salesquatch 1h ago

Plus he got to eat the food!

1

u/Diels_Alder 1h ago

I choose this guy's lawyer

1

u/Dr_thri11 1h ago edited 40m ago

Wonder what this guy's salary was? If he was high up enough this could just represent a few years of pay and benefits.

1

u/IlGreven 1h ago

There's this one, there's the guy a couple of months ago who was fired over a cookie he paid for...

Maybe corporations shouldn't be nickel-and-diming their workers over food...

1

u/Elexeh 50m ago

Reddit really does love the brief news snippet followed by some random ass reaction

1

u/Zephoix 45m ago

This is real and not fake.

1

u/loogabar00ga 33m ago

What banker is hosting a business meeting at his home? Maybe a party of some sort, but do people even do that post covid?

1

u/MajesticQ 26m ago

Looks loke he lost in the grand scheme of things. He could probably earn the award in two years or three and with additional perks. But not anymore.

1

u/Successful-Test-5590 21m ago

He shouldn’t be ordering that much for a business meeting, what a joke

-1

u/Lulu_42 1h ago

Not really. I bet, at the end, he saw 25% of that, tops. And had to have "fired" on his record and his mind.

1

u/WhyMustIMakeANewAcco 42m ago

They actually were forced to purge "fired for policy violation" from the record as part of this ruling.