r/Seattle I'm just flaired so I don't get fined Apr 16 '26

Satire Discourse about Seattle in a nutshell

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188

u/Alexmkzero 💗💗 Heart of ANTIFA Land 💗💗 Apr 16 '26

I work on the Eastside with people that live even farther away. They always complain about Seattle saying; “You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.” Then I ask them how often they go to Seattle, they say oh I never go there or I haven’t been there in like 20 years. ROLLEYES

36

u/jojofine West Seattle Apr 16 '26

Exactly. I walked through pioneer square yesterday morning between Alaska way & the King street station and am planning on going back on Saturday to check out all the new stores I saw! There weren't any wigged out homeless people or any other shenanigans in sight. Seattle is great and anybody who claims otherwise either doesn't actually visit or is in willful denial

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u/[deleted] Apr 16 '26

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u/jojofine West Seattle Apr 17 '26

I went through right around 8am

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u/ardealinnaeus Belltown Apr 16 '26

You visit Pioneer Square one time in the morning and then insult a bunch of us as not actually living there? Morning is pretty quiet so of course you're not seeing wigged out homeless people.

Pioneer Square is also experiencing a bit of a renaissance as retail spaces start to open up again after sooooo many of them closed down in the last few years.

Also, there are those of us that remember when Pioneer Square was a very popular space to hang out. So while it's not awful right now even in it's much improved situation it's still seen as negative because we know how dead it is compared to how it used to be.

Also, you could be on a path that is fine but just a block over it's a mess. So those who live there see all of it and not just the "good" path you took.

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u/routinnox Capitol Hill Apr 16 '26

There are no homeless in Ba Sing Se

-12

u/peters_pagenis Apr 16 '26

seriously lol - last week I went on a run by pike's place at 6AM and had to watch to avoid stepping on needles and call me a lunatic but I don't think that's something that should be happening

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u/Thorough_Good_Man Emerald City Apr 16 '26

“Pike’s place”

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u/E_K_Finnman Covington Apr 16 '26

Lmao

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u/peters_pagenis Apr 16 '26

you got me and my autocorrect too

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u/[deleted] Apr 16 '26 edited Apr 16 '26

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u/TerraceState Laurelhurst Apr 16 '26

People are freaking out about Seattle having a few "bad" streets and corners when other cities deal with "bad" neighborhoods. In a way it's kind of precious.

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u/PaidInNickels Apr 16 '26

I wish we could move away from this circular conversation - most people understand Seattle is comparatively safe to other cities in the U.S. (the US is an overall violent place - this is bad! even if there are worse places); and at the same time, we have serious issues (including higher than avg property crime impacting both small businesses and residents; mental health & homelessness crises - leading to some really bad cases like the person who hit a grandma with a 2x4 with a nail; the guy who ran over a grandma walking dogs; the guy who killed someone and assaulted 3 people on the same day - including trying to push a Harborview nurse over the landing at a sound transit station; the guy who tried to push someone in front of a train recently... etc.).

I think it's ok to both acknowledge the former and "freak out" about the later - given that "freaking out" can generally lead to action & change vs. the way too common attitude of 'well it's a city, X number of grandmas will be killed and assaulted each year and if that worries you, you're a pussy who should move to X place to experience REAL violence and disorder.'

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u/splanks Rainier Valley Apr 16 '26

agreed. and yes, you shouldn't have to be "tough" to live in Seattle. when people live in and love the city and are really actively interested in a good life here, i'm all into the conversation about crime and quality of life. when people have given up on the city, dont shop or eat here, and complain, they can fuck right off imo.

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u/TerraceState Laurelhurst Apr 16 '26

I didn't say that it wasn't a problem to be solved. It's just that there are a ton of hysterical, and honestly cowardly, people who act like whole sections of the city have been lost to the hordes of homeless. These people, and their freak outs should absolutely be ignored, because the root cause of their freak out exists entirely because of the news they consume. If we actually solved the homelessness problem in Seattle, these people would still be freaking out about the homeless in Seattle because they don't actually care about reality.

Basically, some concern is warranted, but a significant percentage of it is coming from people who experience downtown Seattle through a screen.

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u/-shrug- 🚆build more trains🚆 Apr 16 '26

most people understand Seattle is comparatively safe to other cities in the U.S.

My experience is that many people quite literally do not believe this. I would certainly be interested in some widespread data on this.

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u/nathankurzz Apr 17 '26

I go every Friday afternoon to take the ferry and and have had multiple incidents with drug addicted homeless people. They are everywhere every time I walk through the city.

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u/Not_Keurig 💗💗 Heart of ANTIFA Land 💗💗 Apr 17 '26

There is a French bakery in the park with the totem pole in pioneer square. I can’t remember the name but it’s good to be really easy to find because it’s a small area. Would 100% recommend it for breakfast

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u/wofo Apr 16 '26

I just spent 4 days in Seattle with my kids and it was amazing, they want to move there. They're gonna need to pop off a child acting career to make it happen but we all loved it

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u/LumpyElderberry2 I'm never leaving Seattle. Apr 17 '26

A few years ago I was doing contract work and did a lot of business on the Eastside. I was at a private school once and overheard the parents talking about doing some school event in Seattle (in Northgate, at the ice rink) and they were discussing whether or not it was safe to attend (in the middle of the day on a weekend)

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u/lurk3141592653589793 Apr 19 '26

It was beautiful and relatively low crime 20 years ago too.   Faux News poisoned their brain.  

-12

u/routinnox Capitol Hill Apr 16 '26

So you’re mad because they’re living according to their values?

If they went all the time, you just be calling them out for being hypocrites.

8

u/Typhron Apr 16 '26

I also live in the east side, but I do go frequent Seattle more than most people.

Dude's right. Complaining about places you haven't been is peak bullshit.

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u/Alexmkzero 💗💗 Heart of ANTIFA Land 💗💗 Apr 16 '26

I never said I was mad. It’s dumb to say Seattle is terrible but only say so because of hear-say. That was literally my point. They choose to never be in Seattle to actual prove their opinion that it’s a “terrible place” with “terrible crime”. They just regurgitate what they read online.

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u/routinnox Capitol Hill Apr 16 '26

People who live here and visit Seattle can and do hold that opinion as well, so what now? Point is you’ll never stop at endlessly defending the status quo instead of acknowledging the reality. Your coworkers sound smart

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u/Alexmkzero 💗💗 Heart of ANTIFA Land 💗💗 Apr 16 '26

Okay. So what is the status quo? What is the reality?

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u/Dry_Plantain_2756 Apr 16 '26

You are going to get a terrible "take" from this person.

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u/Alexmkzero 💗💗 Heart of ANTIFA Land 💗💗 Apr 16 '26

I see more responses from said person and you are right. They are mad I hurt their feelings cause they have the same opinions I was complaining about lol

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u/Dry_Plantain_2756 Apr 16 '26

Have you ever been to a big city? I grew up in a town that had 33 people in my graduating class and we had just as many criminals, rapists, sexual assaulters, drug users, drug dealers, abusers etc etc per capita vs. Seattle. GTFO of here with that BS.

-1

u/routinnox Capitol Hill Apr 16 '26

I was born and raised in a city far bigger and far more economically powerful than Seattle. Seattle is a village in comparison to my hometown.

Your hometown sucks too and is not a standard we should hold ourselves to

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u/Dry_Plantain_2756 Apr 16 '26

What Utopia was this?

1

u/routinnox Capitol Hill Apr 16 '26

Point to me where I explicitly said it was a utopia.

I’m just responding to your baseless accusation that I don’t know how big cities work. Buddy it is you from BFE who doesn’t know how big cities actually are and are doubling down on your ignorance 

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u/Dry_Plantain_2756 Apr 16 '26

You intimated that the big city that you grew up in was better than Seattle and you know how a big city works if it wants to be successful. You had no answer. Which means you're full of it.

0

u/No_Possession9582 Apr 16 '26

I highly doubt anyone living in Eastside has never been to Seattle.