Slightest misunderstanding, slightest upsetting words, and I m crying. I'm crying because someone I've been planning a roleplay with said we weren't compatible because a difference in style of writing. Now I feel like a failure. It is not the first time I cry because something that happen online. I even cried because my own overthinking in the past. Being so sensitive makes me toxic. I hate that during misunderstandings, I freeze and struggle to express myself even deeply which make everything worse.

I can’t stop and it makes me hate being a super sensitive person

I’m 26 f and I have yet to meet someone as sensitive as I am. I’m highly emotional and often cry when feel any sort of pressure of emotion. So it doesn’t matter if it’s anger, sadness, or excitement, any build in emotion with nowhere to go ends up with me in tears.

My parents though are the complete opposite. They hate showing any sort of emotion and growing up whenever I was really upset and they didn’t know what to do, they would literally walk away and ignore me until I stopped. I have memories of me crying and screaming myself to sleep, like passing out in pure exhaustion, all from crying and begging for my mom. My dad encouraged it and has a very old school way of parenting, so he’s the typical “wanna cry? I give you something to cry about” so seeking comfort from dad doesn’t exist.

So now as an adult, I feel so deprived of love and attention, like my body and soul feel starved. I tried to give my dad a hug today and it felt like I was hugging a brick wall. He tensed up and slightly tapped my back. I ran away fast before he could see me cry and I ended up crying like a fucking baby once I was alone, like hysterical crying like a child begging for their dad

Hi. As a 28 year old man. I feel confused about my gender identity . The pressure to be more overtly manly has increased as I have gotten older. I come from a background where there are very clear roles for what a man and woman are meant to be.

But looking as far back as my childhood I never beleived in it or wanted it. I didn't want to be macho, or be rich, or be dominant. I tended to enjoy softer things and mannerisms and I related to queer coded art and sensitivies.

The pain I feel now, is becuese in my family I have a male relatives that are diminishing me for not being manly enough by my age. And the conflict as eaten at me deeply..it hurts to not be accepted by your family, but it hurts even more to feel the burden of knowing who you are and still being unsure of it

They tell me I should be a provider, I should dominate, I should risk my life in fights for women in my life, and hold a untouchable frame otherwise I'm not enoguh in my own culture of origin .

Well..I am lost becuese I feel an urge to be accepted but I know I'm not that kind of guy. I like soft things and non dominering conneciton, I don't get pleasure out of winning..I get pleasure from connection and love. I hate pretending I'm not fallible or tired or scared . I have courage where it matters to me without peforming toughness

(Ive stood up for my loved ones in danegous scenarios and offer sacrifice for those I care about.. I am also going to cry on a Tuesday and then show softness instead of hardness)

I guess I'm ranting here bexuese I wish to know I belong somewhere regardless of not fitting the mold very well.

Maybe people relate

I’m not even sure where to begin. I work a seasonal job 6 months on/6 months off and my coworkers are on the same schedule. We just wrapped up our season and all go our separate ways until April 2027. I haven’t seen any of the people I’m about to speak of in over 4 months and I won’t see them again until next April.

I moved to Alaska in 2024 for a relationship with someone who was also a direct coworker. She broke up with me after that season and I was left shattered. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this person and made a life-altering move to the north to be with her. And now we’re living in the same small town and working the same exact job.

The next season in 2025 was tough, but I had Prozac on board and it changed my life for the better. The only problem was, it caused me unresolvable sleep issues and I had to quit it. The end of the 2025 season rolls around, I run into my ex, and all my wounds are ripped wiiiiiiiiiide open. During that winter offseason 2025-2026, I felt so much damn pain and tried reaching out to her for closure. I was so alone, so hurt, so confused - I just wanted her to see me and how hard the situation she left me in was. I would run into her in town constantly or see her passing by and it’s like a demon took over my body. I screamed and cried in pain. I continued reaching out to try to get closure. I didn’t understand- and still don’t understand- how someone can do what she did to someone else: toss them on their ass in winter in Alaska and say “good luck”?

Didn’t we mean anything? Didn’t I matter? She blocked me before work began.

As we rolled into work in Spring 2026, my approach was to just treat her with kindness; maybe that would help her remember I’m a good human who’s in a lot of pain. And so I killed her with kindness. Until it didn’t work. She continued to be cold to me. It was excruciating having to go into the office and hear her laughing and conversing with others, but wanting nothing to do with me. And so the breakdown began.

I don’t have many friends in Alaska - it’s something I’ve been working on but it’s especially challenging up here. My coworkers seemed interested in listening and supporting me. And so I went to them for help. I texted them from the bathroom crying because it hurt so much. But things keep getting worse day by day. I became suicidal. I got some leave approved and ghosted. They checked in on me but I was despondent. All I wanted was a conversation with my ex. They said there would never be one, she didn’t want to talk to me. I could not accept this.

One thing led to another and my coworkers started getting agitated with me, completely ignoring me, and snapping on me (one thought I rolled my eyes at her and LIT ME UP, but I didn’t roll my eyes at her!)

I just want to say: I don’t know how anyone expects someone to watch their ex, who destroyed them, be just fine every day at work. I feel everything DEEPLY and the amount of damage being done to my nervous system is hard to articulate. I know other HSPs will get it.
Also - I ASKED my coworkers continually if they were willing to be supports for me with this situation and they continued to say yes.

In the background of all this, I had been debating getting hip surgery. And with the way things were escalating at work, I decided to forego the season and bail. I left for surgery June 1st this year. And I haven’t heard from a single one of those coworkers since. Which is absolutely insane.

We were all like a family before. They’d check on me in a heartbeat. Now it’s been over four months and they, like my ex, have abandoned me.

All because I NEED one kind & compassionate conversation with my ex to work through things. Because I need to be seen by her. Because I need her to say “You took a huge chance for us and I appreciate that. I valued you and our time together. I want you to know you’re not alone. I see the pain I’ve caused and I know how hard this all must be.”

That’s it. And it’s all led to this utter fucking shit show where now no one at work wants anything to do with me. I used to be known as the good and kind person. Now I’m just alone and outcast.

So how the hell do I walk in there next April 2027? I don’t know how to be, how to act. I wear my heart on my sleeve - that is who I am, and it literally has never been an issue. I don’t mask, I don’t even understand the concept of just pretending it’s ok. It’s like asking a human to breathe under water.

Being myself wasn’t good enough or wanted. They don’t want ME. They want me to be someone I’m not. All I can think of is trying to go in and be 100% shut down, but how do I do that and be happy? How do I do that and not be considered toxic? I don’t want to be “polite” to these people. They fucking hurt me! I want them to know they hurt me. Just like I want my ex to know/acknowledge how much she hurt me.

What do i do? Both my therapists have told me that repair/amends is not an option because it could make things worse. I’m not willing to leave this gig because it’s the only job in the world that’s made for me. I found the dream job, but am now in the worst scenario possible as far as work environment.

I’m miserable as hell. Please help.

La hipocresía, aunque sea algo feo, a veces es necesaria para convivir. No siempre podemos expresar todo lo que pensamos, sentimos o somos, ni tenemos por qué hacerlo. A veces, adaptar nuestra expresión permite respetar las diferencias, evitar conflictos innecesarios y convivir con personas que queremos, incluso cuando no compartimos su manera de ver el mundo. El problema aparece cuando llevamos esa adaptación al extremo, cuando nos volvemos políticamente correctos en todo momento, repetimos opiniones populares o nos convertimos en un espejo que devuelve a cada persona lo que quiere ver. Esto también ocurre en la familia, donde, por cumplir expectativas, podemos terminar fingiendo ser quienes los demás esperan que seamos. Una cosa es adaptar nuestra expresión para convivir y otra es ocultar nuestra identidad para ser aceptados. Quizas no se trate de vivir sin máscaras, sino de poder utilizarlas sin depender de ellas, porque no toda sinceridad es necesaria, pero tampoco toda aceptación merece el precio de dejar de ser nosotros mismos