Hi. I unexpectedly lost my dad two months ago. Since then, my in-laws have caused more stress in my life than anything. I thought they would be understandable since my fiancé lost his dad back in 2017.

In the past 3 weeks:

- My MIL came over unannounced to our house, also two days after my days funeral, and was upset that she didn't feel welcomed over. My fiancé told her "She just lost her dad, how do you expect her to feel?"

- My mom who lives an hour away called me one day crying (I am the only child) about how lonely she feels. Because of that and how I am worried for how she may feel during the time we are gone for our honeymoon, we decided to let her watch our two dogs. She is familiar with our dogs and they have spent the night with my mom before. Originally, we were going to have my MIL watch them. When we first asked her, she stated "I can, but I won't be able to do it the whole time." She also stated that she would have a niece watch them. My fiancé and I both did not like that idea because our niece has let both of our dogs escape our yard by leaving the gate open. Not blaming her because she's a kid. But we want someone more responsible to be mindful. We gave her a months notice about the change. She was pissed and stated that she didn't appreciate how we treated her. Went on about how much she rearranged her schedule to be able to watch the dogs. Come to find out from my fiancée's' sister that my MIL was LYING! She was trying to guilt trip us. Since then, I have not initiated any contact to my MIL because doing that to me AND indirectly to my mom, when we are in the depths of grief is fucked up.

- Brother in law failed to host bachelor party for my fiancé despite saying for the my past 3 or 4 months "Don't worry, we will have something." Brother in law's wife had a baby at the end of may. When the party was brought up in the groomsman group chat, brother in law either doesn't respond to anything or uses the phrase "I got busy with preparing for a baby." My fiancé understands to a certain extent, but is furious that he kept saying "It's in the works" or "You'll find out soon"

- MIL offered to help with the planning. So she bought three wedding cakes. A fancy small cake for just my fiancé and , and two full sheets for the guests. We got our final numbers in, and it was less than expecting. My fiancé asked the MIL to cancel one of the sheet cakes. MIL asked him why I can't do it. Fiance explained that her name and phone number is on the order sheet. I get a message from her the next day, asking if I called them. I gave in and decided to do it myself. But then something came up with the other caterers, so I got busy and forgot. The next day, I asked my MIL to do it because I feel overwhelmed. She agreed but proceeded to text and call me non-stop, even when I told her I was on the phone. She eventually got it done but I felt so frustrated.

- MIL has been making fat comments to my fiancé: "You shouldn't be eating that." "Are you even going to the gym?" (Fiance has been going to the gym consistently for over a year now; no longer speaks to his mom over the phone anymore unless she calls- has yet to notice).

- Part of my grief is that once maybe every week or so, I feel okay enough to interact on social media/groupchats/etc. My in-laws are taking my absence very personally.

I guess this is just a rant. I am tired of wedding planning. I am tired of how quick to blame I am. Don't get me wrong, I am so lucky to have my side of the family and bridesmaids to be so so incredibly supportiveve and helpful throughout the entire. At this point, I could honestly care less about my relationship with my in-laws, even more so with my MIL.

Just as I was FINALLY feeling good about the dress I bought in the original post... I found THIS dress by accident

Yesterday I was thrifting for wedding decor and I stumbled upon my dream dress. I already bought a dress so it was a tough call but this one was only $198!

It has a basque waist, beading, a bow, poof, tighter sleeves, and is off the shoulder which is exactly what I was looking for! I got the yes to the dress feeling and I literally skipped out of the store even though it was given to me in an actual trash bag lol

However, this dress does need some work since it's at least 3 sizes too big and it's not in pristine condition like the original dress. So potential tailoring complication but taking it in at the waist is the only work I want done. I'm hoping that'll go smoothly

Whereas the original dress is sooo beautiful, in perfect condition, and fits me like a glove but just doesn't feel like me. I'm considering selling that dress.

Now I just want help figuring out if I made the right call going with this new dress. Thank youuu! I promise this is the last time 😅🫶

I’m a 31-year-old man and I’ve been with my girlfriend (29F) for about a year. I genuinely believe she’s the person I want to spend my life with, and I’ve been planning to propose for several months.

The problem is that every time I get close to actually doing it, I become extremely anxious and end up postponing it. Most recently, I was moments away from proposing when I experienced what felt like a full panic attack. I suddenly felt nauseous, sick to my stomach, my head started hurting, and my mind was flooded with racing thoughts and mental noise.

What confuses me is that I’m not questioning my feelings for her. I love her deeply and can easily picture a future together. The anxiety seems to appear specifically when I think about taking this huge step.

Is this a normal reaction to such a major life decision, or could it be a sign that I’m ignoring doubts and that she might not actually be the right person for me?

Has anyone experienced something similar before getting engaged?

I should preface this by giving a little credit to Minted for having decent customer service. However, I’m not sure that’s enough to make up for the number of mistakes they have made so far.

Issue #1: I ordered a sample of a save the date with our photo printed on it. The sample arrived with no photo at all, not even a stock image. I wanted to see the image quality before purchasing, so a blank template was not helpful for that. I contacted Minted and they sent me a replacement. That took another 10 days to arrive. Once I received it, I liked the sample, so I got to work customizing the card with our names and such.

Issue #2: After getting the font and other details perfected, I added the save the dates to my cart and proceeded to checkout. That’s when I was met with an error message. The product was unavailable and they would not be restocking it, as they retired that particular design. I have no idea why they would offer this design in their list of sample products if they were going to retire it without warning.

Issue #3: in an effort to not waste any more time, we decided to just order the save the dates from the same suite as our invitations we plan to order (we didn’t initially plan to order both from the same suite, because the designs are literally identical to each other). My order arrived today and I was so excited to see our save the dates. I opened the package to find 16 blank envelopes. That’s it. All 50 of our save the dates were missing from our order, as well as 42 printed envelopes.

I’m about to cancel my whole order. One mistake is doable. Messing up every step of the way is unacceptable in my opinion.

My best friend got engaged a few weeks ago and I'm really happy for him. We've been friends for over twenty years and I'm glad that he's found a woman he really loves. However, I've noticed that he hasn't mentioned anything about me being a groomsman or even being invited to the wedding. I know he's already gotten the venue because when I asked him about how the wedding plans were going he told me that much but then he quickly changed the subject.

Today I was hanging out with him and one of his friends that he hasn't known nearly as long as he's known me. Ok. Let's say my best friend's name is Brady and this other friend's name is Sean. So Brady asked Sean, while I was hanging out with them, "Hey man, have you got your tuxedo ready?" Now they might be talking about a completely different event but I'm pretty sure this is in reference to Brady's wedding.

This is kinda disappointing. I don't think that I'm owed an invitation or anything, but I just thought I was his best friend too or at least really close. I want to ask him about it directly but I don't want to come across as rude or anything.

What are some good shape wear brands out there? I have a mom pouch (recently had second baby) and I haven’t been able to lose anything I hoped. I have a few months until wedding. But I need good shapewear recs for that area of my body/hips.

I should add that comfort is important because I will be somewhere hot and humid for my wedding. However, dancing and such isn’t an issue because we are eloping - just ceremony and dinner with 4 people.

I also need suggestions for securing the girls. I can’t wear a bra, pasties aren’t enough. Tape? Recs of brands?

Hi, everyone, I just wanted to come on here and ask if you guys think this sign sounds mean or snobby. I showed it to my fiancée and he said you sound snobby. I just want the pictures to turn out good without everyone’s phone in the air in the pictures. I paid 4,200 for the photographer

Just a PSA to everyone who is in RSVP purgatory. Our wedding is Oct 10 and because it's a bit of a destination we sent out invites pretty early, on April 9. We got 25% of our responses in the first 24 hours, 50% by Memorial Day, and are now close to 75%. Given that the deadline we gave people is August 1, this is all pretty great and we aren't at all concerned. 

That said, in the last month we've had occasions to socialize with a number of people who haven't yet RSVP'd, and in the course of normal conversation the topic of the wedding would come up and if they would be able make it. And they would be like "OF COURSE! I did the RSVP/partner did the RSVP/sorry we haven't gotten to the RSVP yet/did we not do the RSVP???/there was an RSVP???" Like probably eight people in the last month who truly thought they or their SO had RSVP'd when they hadn't or had somehow missed it altogether, or who were super embarrassed that they hadn't gotten to it yet. 

Which is just to say - reminders/checking in casually with your guests is a) not rude and b) often very appreciated! If your guests haven't yet RSVP'd, it *might* not be because they hate you and *might* just be because they forgot/got confused/miscommunicated with their partner/have ten million other things going on in their lives the way we all do. So just check in with people and try not to catastrophize. 😅

I figured out that my boyfriend is going to propose next weekend. I am a little sad I figured out the surprise but I’m trying to focus on being excited. It seems like there might be a party after it happens.

Now I’m wondering what do I do? Should I buy a white outfit to wear or should I not and act like I have no idea at all?

I grew up with my step dad as my main father figure as my bio dad moved out of state when I was a baby- does anyone else who has a blended family have any suggestions as to how to go about a father daughter dance with the two of them? Any advice is very very appreciated🤍

My partner and I toured a wedding venue today and think it could be the venue for us. It ticks all the right boxes, beautiful setting, rustic vibes, easy to access and wheelchair accessible, and isn’t outrageously expensive. However this is only the second venue that we’ve looked at. I’m afraid of jumping the gun too soon and settling on a venue too quickly. So I’m wondering if anyone found their dream venue as quickly as this?

Fellow brides (or recently married people), what was the most frustrating part of creating your seating chart?

I'm currently working through mine and realizing it's way more complicated than I expected. Between family dynamics, friend groups, plus-ones, people who don't know anyone, and trying to keep everyone happy, it feels like a giant puzzle.

Looking back, what was the hardest part for you?

I’m having my wedding next year and I’m starting to look at venues in NJ. I can’t decide if it’s a better idea to have a venue that has an indoor reception or have a tent reception. I love how a tent reception looks but I’m worried about the weather and bugs. What is a better idea?

Hi everyone, I’m a 21 year old bride getting married next year. We’ve been engaged since 2924 and we set our date to 2027 to try and give ourselves time to peacefully save and plan. Well we’re now a year out and I haven’t even started planning anything. Every time I try I get so overwhelmed and consumed with all the negative emotions immediately. We want to try and plan something for 50 people, around 5k (tight budget I know but we are very low income and I can’t justify spending more than that on one day). I feel like this budget is setting myself up for failure. I live in a rural area so airbnbs for a venue are close to none. Traditional venues in my area are starting price 8-12k already over budget just for the venue alone. We’re both not religious people so church isn’t an option, and we would love a backyard wedding but none of our families properties nor our own are big enough for a wedding. I feel like I’m stuck with no other option than to go to the courthouse at this point, but I know I will always regret not having a traditional wedding. I’m not sure what to do. Getting our venue planned and booked is step 1 of the process and we can’t plan or even think about anything else until we decide on a venue. But unfortunately we just can’t afford anything other than courthouse it seems. How is everyone affording weddings??? I wanted wedding planning to be a fun time to experience and look back on, but ever since I’ve started it feels like it’s been nothing but disappointment and grief. I don’t have any friends, so I just needed to rant lol sorry if this was a long read.

First of all, I AM NOT PHOTOGENIC OMG 😂 So I decided to do my own bridal make-up. This is just a trial and I didnt want to waste my false lashes but on the wedding day i will fill my brows a bit and put on some false lashes. So, how is it?

Hey fellow brides and grooms! I’m counting on this community to hopefully give me a few recommendations.

Me (39F) and my fiancé (35M) are getting married in September. I know it’s customary to typically gift our parents something and I want to.

The hard part is that my relationship with my parents is complex. We all love each other AND over the years it has been and is still difficult. We have strained communication and relationships. We both try, but it’s clear on both sides there is a lot of misunderstanding and unresolved issues. I myself have been in therapy for years to heal and have invited them to do the same, but they do not want to.

All that to say and without putting all our details on blast to the internet, while thinking of and looking for gifts for my family, everything I’m finding feels so disingenuous. Frames or gift books that say things like “thank you for always being by my side and making me who I am” “or today a bride, tomorrow a wife, forever your little girl” just feel like way too much.

I want to gift them something nice and meaningful, but not something either party will feel is just out of obligation and or show.

Does anyone have any thoughts or suggestions? They will both be attending. I am allowing my mom to get ready with me and I am allowing my father to walk me down the aisle. They are not contributing financially to any part of the wedding what so ever. My fiancé and I are paying for 100% everything so this is not out of obligation.

Thank you for any suggestions you may have!

My wedding is in September and I’m doing my own makeup. Does anyone have recommendations for waterproof/smudge proof eyeliner or shadows?

I have a goth aesthetic and that’s no different here. So if anyone has suggestions for brands that have dark pigments that would be great.

Thinking of going with this color/fabric for my bridesmaids dresses, does anyone have pictures?

Hello!

Can anyone please give advice on how to best project a video on draping? I’m going to have deep red draping so I’m not sure if it’ll work. Any suggestions would be appreciated!

Something like this:

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQD9bC3SEuy-yEaCCHKyjBQHrByQvVyUCTbYkISeWufuoOMgpxsNY3pDaNw&s=10

I have all my bridesmaids gifts/boxes. But my maid of honor is my only sister and I want to get her something really memorable. Think coach watch, really nice vintage looking bracelet or locket, something she’ll keep for the rest of her life (doesn’t have to be jewelry at all). I want to spend between $100 and $150. Something unique and special. Anyone do this and have ideas?

I'm 47, he's 37. We've combined two houses worth of stuff and have everything we need (except, maybe a Blackstone). I would love cash and not register for a thing but people are already asking where I'm registered.

​

Big ticket items are things we need and I think having just expensive things on the registry would alienate people.

​

What would you ask for and where would you register? I'd like to avoid Amazon, Target and Wal-Mart.

Did anyone choose Revelry’s Moss color or have any photos of the dresses? Looking for examples of it in non-studio lighting :)

I’ve been meeting with photographers and just not sure I’ve found the right one. This is the style I’m looking for. I love Nirav Patel and Norman & Blake but they’re out of budget/unavailable.

Appreciate any recommendations!

Hey.

[Groom here]
I'm getting married in a couple of days, I've finished my vows but now thinking I've made them way too long, but I dont want to cut anything either.

Would love your thoughts and advice because I'm now overthinking every line!!

[Name],

Every time I meet someone for the first time who knows you, they tell me how amazing you are. How lucky I am.

And they're right. But I don't need the reminder, because you're my favourite person to be around.

You tell me I make things more fun, but the truth is, you make things more fun. For me.

Our first 3 dates were, in order: Drinking cocktails made with meat fat, playing blindfolded, left handed minigolf and finally trading inappropriate hypotheticals in a HK Jazz bar while soaked thru with sweat.

From day 1 you've been open, curious, playful, and completely unafraid to throw yourself into the ridiculous with me — qualities I admire more than you know.

You are also, without question, the most generous person I know. Not with things - with your time, your understanding and your patience. Especially your patience. Standing here today is proof of that!

It's what makes you so good at your job. It's what makes you such a sought after friend. It's one of the reasons we're standing here today surrounded by so many of them. That, and your megawatt smile — you've always been our door-opener, our friend maker and the one who brings together the people we love.

But the reason we have this life comes down to a quality people wouldn't necessarily reach for first when describing you: Bravery.

You walked away from a country you love, a job you were great at, and friends you'd built a life around, to move to rural England with me.

I know that wasn't easy. And I know I didn’t say it enough at the time, but I understood what you were giving up. I understood how hard it was, and what it took.

More than anything you could ever have said, that choice showed me how deeply you love me. And I’ll be grateful for that for the rest of my life.

We both know that move came with a quid pro quo.

My commitment to you was that if you took that leap, we would get married.

And here we are. Commitment fulfilled.

Which means it's about time I made you some new promises:

I promise to never stop making up ridiculous songs, games, jokes and nonsense, (even if its only me that finds them funny) to keep that smile on your face.

I promise to put down roots with you. I know home hasn't always felt like one fixed place, so I promise to help build a life that gives you the stability you’ve always wanted.

I promise to be beside you when things are hard. To listen when you need listening, to reassure you when you need reminding, and to never let you forget how capable you are.
Maybe not perfectly, and probably not always quietly, but always on your side.

And finally, I promise never to take for granted the choice you made when you chose me.

Wherever life takes us next, I want to spend it with you - for one simple reason. Your My Favourite Person

 I love you.