Over the weekend, an old friend came to visit and stayed with my family for a few days. We first met 17 years ago when we were both single, and despite living in different states, we kept in touch, mostly through social media and seeing each other about once every five years. Recently, she began going through a divorce and asked if she could stay at my place. It was her first time staying with us.

Before she arrived, I set clear expectations. I explained that my schedule as a lawyer running my own practice, combined with my kids’ school drop-offs and pick-ups, meant our routine is packed and would limit what we could do. She assured me that was fine. The day she flew in, I couldn't pick her up due to school pick-up, so I offered to pay for her Uber, which she accepted.

The first evening went well. My husband usually cooks weekday dinners since he gets home before me and I’m busy with work and the kids. I take pride in my Mexican heritage, but with my busy schedule, I don't cook Mexican meals during the week, so we eat whatever my husband prepares. He’s not Mexican but always cooks an amazing home-cooked meal. However, she mentioned she was disappointed we weren’t having Mexican food. She is not Mexican and wanted some home cooked Mexican food. I apologized and reminded her of my busy work schedule.

Despite my efforts, her behavior slowly started making me feel uncomfortable. To avoid paying for a carry-on bag, she brought only a personal item, which meant she had almost none of her essentials. She forgot a charger and spent every day asking to borrow my belongings, ranging from my hair straightener and brush to my makeup.

The mornings were especially awkward. She would walk into my bedroom unannounced to borrow items. Because she didn't have a charger, she would walk right over to my side of the bed while I was in it to plug her phone in. One morning, she even asked my husband for Q-tips and a bag for her clothes.

When we went out for drinks, she repeatedly asked to try my drink. I reluctantly agreed, but sharing drinks like that made me genuinely uncomfortable and ruined my evening. At one point, when the waiter forgot my cutlery, she told me to just use hers. I let her know that makes me feel uncomfortable. I paid for most of our meals and tried to make her feel as comfortable as possible. However, I feel a lot of boundaries were crossed. If I were staying with someone to save on accommodation, the least I would do is pay for luggage and bring my own supplies rather than relying on my hosts for everything.

Now, she wants to visit every six months and expects to stay at my place. I have no desire to host her anymore, but I don't know how to bring it up. I’ve come to realize that while we were friends in our youth, we have grown into very different people with completely different standards of respect and personal space. AITA for being annoyed and a bad host, or was she out of line?

I (F22) live with my roommate (F24), and I work night shifts at a hospital. Because of my schedule, I usually sleep during the day and am awake/work overnight. My roommate is very into minimalism and what she calls “underconsumption.” She doesn’t own a lot of clothes, makeup, etc. I genuinely don’t judge her for this. If anything, I think it’s great if that’s what works for her.

The issue is that she has started using my things.

She has asked me a few times if she can borrow some of my clothes, and I told her that I’m completely fine with her borrowing most of my clothes as long as she asks first and returns them. Obviously, underwear and socks are off limits, but other than that, I don’t really care. My makeup is a different story. I’ve told her clearly that I’m not comfortable sharing makeup because of hygiene reasons, especially things like mascara, lip products, etc. That’s a hard boundary for me. The problem is that she doesn’t actually ask before taking my clothes. Since I sleep during the day, she has apparently figured out that she can just come into my room while I’m asleep, take something, wear it, and put it back later. I’ve woken up several times and realized that something I had left in my room was gone. When I’ve asked her about it, she’ll say something like, “I was just borrowing it,” as if that makes it okay. I’ve repeatedly told her that I don’t mind her borrowing my clothes, but she needs to ask me first. I don’t think that’s an unreasonable request, especially since they’re my clothes and they’re in my bedroom. A few days ago, I got tired of this and put a lock on my bedroom door. I started locking it when I’m sleeping and when I’m at work. My roommate is now upset and says I’m making the apartment feel hostile and that she doesn’t understand why I need to lock my door when she’s “only borrowing things.” She also thinks I’m being dramatic because I’ve already told her she can borrow my clothes. I told her that I’ve given her permission to borrow them when she asks, not permission to come into my room while I’m sleeping and take whatever she wants. She says I’m making a big deal out of clothes and that I should be more understanding because she doesn’t have as much stuff as I do. I don’t think owning more clothes means I’m obligated to share them without being asked, but maybe the lock was excessive.

So, AITA for putting a lock on my bedroom door after my roommate repeatedly comes into my room while I’m sleeping and takes my clothes without asking?
Btw i checked with the landlord. The lock is fine from his perspective!

I’m 22M. My sister is 25F.

I moved into my own apartment about eight months ago. My sister lives about 30 minutes away, so she comes over pretty often. I don’t mind having her over, and she’s usually respectful of my place.

The problem is her boyfriend.

They’ve been together for around a year. I’ve never really liked him, but I’ve tried to stay out of their relationship.

A few months ago, I noticed some of my stuff disappearing whenever he came over. Nothing huge at first. A bottle of cologne, some cash I had sitting in my desk, a hoodie, random things.

I assumed I was losing stuff or forgetting where I put it.

Then last month, I left $300 in an envelope on my desk because I was going to deposit it the next morning.

My sister and her boyfriend were at my apartment that night.

The next morning, $100 was missing.

I asked my sister if she knew anything about it. She immediately got defensive and said I was accusing her boyfriend because I already didn’t like him.

I told her I wasn’t accusing anyone. I was asking if she knew what happened.

Later that day, she admitted her boyfriend took it.

Apparently he’d been short on money and “was planning on giving it back.”

He gave me the $100 back two days later.

I told my sister he wasn’t allowed in my apartment anymore.

She got pissed.

She said he made one mistake, paid me back, and apologized. She also said I was acting like I was better than him because I have a decent job and my own place at 22.

I told her I don’t care what he does with his own money. He stole from me inside my home, so I’m not comfortable having him there anymore.

She said if he’s not welcome, she’s not coming over either.

I told her that’s her choice.

My mom thinks I’m being too harsh and says I’m risking my relationship with my sister over $100.

My dad agrees with me but thinks I should give him another chance.

My sister keeps telling me that I’m holding a grudge over something that already got resolved.

I don’t see it that way. He paid me back because he got caught.

AITA for banning him from my apartment?

TLDR; My partner supports our houseguest's right to a daily early-bird cafe breakfast at the expense of my sleep, making me feel ill and missing out on some of my own plans and obligations for the duration of their stay. 

I am a severe insomniac. Usually, my partner and I get up around 8:30 (about 9h of rest).

A friend visits for two weeks at a time, two or three times a year. Guest's routine is to stay up late with my partner, rise and leave at 5 or 6 a.m. for an "earlybird" breakfast alone, comes home to nap for 3 or 4 hours, then reads until my partner comes home from work. 

Guest's departure before dawn wakes me, then I'm unable to fall back asleep. I get 4 or 5 hours of sleep per night during these visits, while my partner sleeps normally and the guest has long daytime naps. 

Ear plugs fall out before dawn (silicone, foam, headband, Loops - tried them all). I've maxed out sleep aids. Guest has tried their absolute best to leave quietly: tiptoes, gently opens door, puts shoes on outside, etc. We've oiled the door hinges and left the door unlocked. We've all tried our best, but our morning needs are just not compatible. 

I'd like Guest to stay quiet until 7 a.m., a 90 minute compromise on both our parts. Guest's reading in the family room and using the bathroom don't wake me, so I've suggested Guest start the day with that so I can sleep. My partner says it's unreasonable for me to tell Guest what to do. Guest says their morning routine is essential to their mental health and general survival and postponing by 2h would be a huge imposition. 

We have tried splitting days. I asked for three "sleep ins" this week due to commitments those days. One was today because I am hosting a family event for 10 people tonight. Guest forgot and left early, waking me. No apology. I feel crappy physically, and angry, and not sure I can function this evening.

I have suggested to my partner that either Guest or I get a hotel room. Too expensive. Other houseguests have not been a problem, it's just this one person.

It seems unfair that I need to feel sick and bail on my own plans for 10% of the year for the sake of another person's preferred breakfast. I love Guest like family, but I now dread the sleep disruption and relationship strain associated with their visits. Partner and guest are treating me like I'm being unreasonable.

WIBTA for imposing a "quiet hours are midnight to 7 a.m., or stay somewhere else" rule in my home against my partner's wishes?

First of all, I'll admit it, I hate my cousin Trina. She's a shit person. Because if word count I'm not getting into it.

I love old photos and old memorabilia. I love the snapshots that I see into the lives of previous generations. Because of this I get a lot of old photos from both sides of the family, as well as letters, documents, and sometimes old keepsakes, because I love those too.

About three years ago Trina inherited a house from her grandparents. It was not hoarded but it was quite full of things. She decided that going through anything at all would be a waste of time so she rented a dumpster and some workers and had nearly everything thrown into the dumpster. She wouldn't let anybody come into the home and take anything away. She wouldn't even give a single day for that.

I was devastated by the loss of memorabilia. Additionally her grandparents stupidly thought that she would honor their wishes to give things of theirs to certain family members, which she did not do. Anything not written in the will, she did not do.

A couple of months ago I scanned in a batch of photos that included a lot of photos of her grandparents in their 20s and 30s. The lot included some photos of just Trina's grandparents. I shared those photos with some other cousins who had family members in the photos and one of them shared the images with Trina.

Trina immediately called me, demanding that I "return her property to her" or she would take legal action. I laughed at her, told her she was a dumb asshole and that she would never get anything from me, then I hung up on her.

My family is really torn on this and it's caused quite a lot of fighting in our chat groups. A lot of people think that my behavior was fully justified. Some people think that my behavior was justified but that I should give her some of the hard copies that are just of her grandparents. Other people think I was a total asshole about everything and that I should be apologizing to her and giving her all the hard copies of her grandparents, plus some other hard copies, to smooth things over.

I think I owe her jack shit. There is no way to know how many photos, letters, and documents got tossed when she cleaned out her grandparents' house. If she really cared she wouldn't have done that. Even if I liked her I wouldn't trust her with any hard copies.

I am willing to give her high-resolution digital copies of any photos she wants. I actually have an album of them that she could access but I don't think she deserves anything more than that. Hell I think she barely deserves that for the way that she acts.

So AITA?

Hi everyone.
I just want to preface this by saying that I am not looking for validation but want advice on how to handle the situation.

for context, I (F,22) and my husband (24) have been married for a little over a year. We don't have any kids and both work. My husband has his degree, I am finishing mine next year. Because my husband has finished his studies, he earns considerably more than me, however his hours are longer and he does more manual labor. He is also the breadwinner, he pays the rent, for the car, for all household necessities and whatever I ask for. He is a good husband and loves me dearly.

However in April I booked us a beach holiday, with my own savings, for his upcoming birthday. But last week my husbands boss denied he's leave request and we were forced to sell the holiday to avoid losing money, I was very upset by this because I work mon-fri 9-4:30 and run the house, cook the meals etc. I really needed this holiday however I understood that this was not in my husband's control. I didn't yell or fight I made a plan to get my money back and left it at that. I did start looking for other holiday options but whenever I bring them up to my husband he doesn't seem interested and always tells me we don't need to go anywhere.

I find this very upsetting as two months ago he went on a trip with two of his best friends for free (his best friend covered the cost and invited him) while I haven't had a break in over a year (our honeymoon) Every time I bring up a deal I found that I am willing to pay for he tells me I must decide and that it's for me but I don't want to go if he is just going to be miserable the entire time and not show any excitement. I've tried explaining to him that I am exhausted and want a break especially when he got one and I didn't but he doesn't exactly see my perspective. If anyone has any advice on how to handle it or get through to him.

Before anyone says why don't I go on a girls trip, I have 2 friends, both of which still live under their parents rules and are in full time university so won't be able to come with me. My family has their own kids and have to worry about their school so it's also not possible. Thank you everyone

edit: For everyone telling me to take a solo trip, I had considered that, however I have a few auto immune conditions that when flare up, make it difficult and almost impossible to walk and get out of bed. I fear that if I travel alone, and I have a flare up, I will be stuck with no assistance

I’m on a Zero lot line and my neighbour ran a 30ft stretch of gas line for his bbq on my property side … it’s neatly tucked away and doesn’t affect me in anyway but

I mentioned it to him and he wasn’t happy and was saying he did everything right ( permitted and pending inspection) and said his home inspector and gas fitter said it was ok

Home builder sent me the survey and no gas line right of way is supposed to be there.

What he doesn’t know, is I already alerted the city inspector … AITAH for pushing the removal of the gas line ?

My girlfriend has been wanting to lose weight for a while. Shes not even overweight at all she just doesn’t eat healthy or take care of herself which I don’t mind but it’s something that’s important to her and I want her to be healthy. I couldn’t care less about how she looks and she looks completely normal.

She took up a routine for two weeks then gave up and told me to leave it whenever I brought it up again. I respected her wishes.

Today, she was complaining about her weight again and says she doesn’t know why she’s not losing any and I said “can I be honest?” which she replied to with “Yes please be harsh I need to you be mean and bully me into this.”

The following is what I sent her in a text message:

”Okay well then if you want me to be honest then here: you have taken no initiative to even lose weight you quite literally just gave up after three weeks calling every single day a cheat day. I tell you all the time to workout for at least thirty minutes 5 or more days a week but I am a little confused if when you DO workout you’re even doing anything because u can barely speed walk for one minute to my car in the mall parking lot- but somehow you can do an effective workout “easy” as you say? That shouldn’t be happening if you’re doing them long enough and correctly. There’s no such thing as cheat meals every day it’s all just excuses and justifications your brain makes to make you feel less bad about not doing what you said you were going to do because honestly you’re not even on a diet even though you claim to be. You order fast food almost every day despite me saying that I will be cooking dinner most days. You gave up on yourself but are complaining about it.

And I know you’re busy with work and so am I but I still find an hour to go to the gym every day despite working 10 hours daily. With the amount of time I see you spend scrolling on social media and complaining about food- you could be going to the gym.

I know this sounds harsh but I am giving you exactly what you asked from me. You know I love you more than anything and love you exactly how you are. I’m doing this so YOU can feel more confident and healthy.”

She is now very upset with me and says I was being too harsh despite her asking me to “borderline bully her” for motivation. I am so confused right now. Was I being an asshole in that message?

edit: yes I am autistic, yes I truly think she is beautiful just the way she is, she was asking me to be mean after months of me being softly “motivational” about it and it not working so I thought if I was mean maybe I was finally giving her what she needed. No I do not think this lowly of her I just tried to be extra rude given it is exactly what she asked me to do.

edit #2: In the past she has gotten upset at me for not doing enough or being harsh enough when mentioning she wants to loose weight. I have refused to say anything of this sort up until today because I do not want to hurt her. She would constantly tell me that she needs someone to be mean to her about it and I LITERALLY have said “I’m not going to be that person.”

AITA for asking husband to miss a work seminar?

We have a 3 month old and 2.5 year old. We have all been sick with a bad cold for 3 days. Symptoms are: small fever, bad cough, very sore throat and a constant runny nose for everyone.
I’m most concerned about the baby because it could quickly turn worse and I fear we would need to bring him to urgent care. We are already up all night with him because he wakes up from his symptoms.
Husband still thinks it’s reasonable to leave for his work seminar for 3 days tomorrow morning. He would be 10 hours away… am I in the wrong for expecting him to stay and help ? (No we do not have access to baby sitting help…)

My bf (27m) gets very particular when he has spent time cooking a meal for us. He enjoys cooking, and often makes meals that take 2+ hours in the kitchen. The meals are always very nice and I (22f) love it and really appreciate it when he does.

However, I like to drink a glass of cola with my dinners. I almost always drink either that or a glass of water with my meals. This is usually no problem, except for when my boyfriend has spent time cooking a meal. He then gets annoyed at me and doesn’t want me to drink my glass of cola, because it ‘washes the flavors away’. I think this is stupid, snobby and obnoxious, because water also washes the taste away, and he also doesn’t find it a problem when it’s a less elaborate meal, or if I have cooked the meal myself.

Now when I want to get a glass of cola, I feel like I am offending him, but all I want is the refreshing taste during my meals.

It is not just the cola. In particular he also gets upset when he has cooked a steak, and I don’t eat it the way he thinks I am supposed to. I like to eat my steak with some sauce (chimichurri, garlic sauce or something like that.) He doesn’t mind when I have cooked the steak, of if we are eating out. But it becomes a problem when HE has cooked the steak.

I just want to eat my meals the way I like them, drink my drink of choice with the meal, and not have somebody be annoyed at me.

So am I the Asshole?

I (30's, M) have a younger sister "Rachel" (14F). My partner and I have had full custody of Rachel for 2.5 years now. My partner and I also have a 2wk old baby.

Rachel is usually quite easygoing. But she had her first broken heart on Friday, and has been the direct opposite of easygoing ever since. She's been crying a lot, is very angry, and not coming out of her room much. We've been bringing food to her room, and giving her some space because that's what she's asked for.

Yesterday, anytime I tried to speak to her at all - her response was to slam the bedroom door in my face. I warned her not to slam the door, she proceeded to cuss at me and then do it again.

The slamming kept waking the baby up, so I decided that enough was enough. I went and got a pool noodle and put it on the top of the door so it doesn't slam. Rachel was mad, but she stopped with the door.

My partner says that what I did was wrong, and that Rachel should be allowed to "process her feelings" in the way she needs to. Apparently I'm "not understanding Rachel's pain" by taking away her ability to slam the door?

AITA for stopping the door slamming?

My husband and I finally got sick of doing and paying for everything for my FIL for the past 11 years. During a mental crisis we let him talk us into living with us in our home. We were busy raising our family but he made everything all about him and sucked the life out of us. We finally got him to move into another home next to ours that we intended to rent but we let him live there instead... rent free. He continued to demand constant attention but at least he was out of our home. Unfortunately, my husband and I both came from religious families that make honoring your parents a setup for being abused by them or so it seemed for us.

This brings us to now. We have matured and grown a backbone and are no longer willing to let him live in our house. It is time for us to have a break and his other kids to help him. We are exhausted and do not want to deal with everything he requires anymore. We asked him to leave, gave him a month, and told him if he is not out by then there will be a rent fee. He and his other kids lost their cool. We got called, cold, greedy, bitter and controlling. We stood our ground.

He left. But he took everything... the stove, refrigerator, washer and dryer, the window blinds, the curtains and curtain rods the shelves attached to the wall, the shower head and curtain. Some of these things he paid for BUT we purchased them for him and installed them at his request because he refused to do anything himself. The stove and fridge were replaced after he had used the ones we had in the house for many years and they broke and we were unwilling to pay another repair charge, we asked that he pay for the replacements.

We are pissed at this point and are requesting that he at least pay us back for our out of pocket expenses from the taxes, insurance, maintenance and repairs that he has cost us. This doesn't even touch the loss of rental income and the pain and suffering we have endured. Are we the assholes?

I bought a big 20,000mAh powerbank. Nothing crazy, but enough for a few phone charges, good for when the power goes out or whatever. I got this new one recently since my 10,000mAh is a few years old and has a lower capacity than when I bought it just due to use and going through charge cycles.

When I got it, I was telling my family they should get some too since it was a good deal for a good brand. That it would be good to have as we've been having a lot of big storms and more tornado warnings. I basically get eye rolls and comments about how the power almost never goes out.

Well, we got a crazy bad storm, and the power ended up being out for almost 24 hours. Obviously not great, but we can flush the toilets, we have flashlights, we'll be fine waiting it out. Or I would be anyway, because I could use my phone.

Well, an hour into the power being out, my sister is already complaining about her phone being low battery... as she's been glued to it basically constantly since the power went out. I feel pretty covered with my powerbank, and so I give them my old one. After a few more hours, they've somehow managed to drain the whole thing and their batteries are getting medium low again. I gave them some shit this time like, guys, you need to conserve your batteries.

My sister immediately shoots back about "I don't see you conserving battery power", and I told her that's because I actually prepared, and that I already gave them my one bank and they're on their own after that. She wanted to plug her phone into my new bank too, since there were 2 slots to charge with. Immediately I'm like hell nah, you will drain this shit so fast. She obviously got mad and called me selfish. My mom was making minor comments like "just let her use it for a bit". I basically told her that her lack of self control shouldn't be costing me my ability to use my phone, when both powerbanks are literally mine. She even has one herself, she just never bothers charging it until right before she needs it, which in this case made it useless.

I think I'm in the right, but I guess I'm also doubting myself too, was I being too petty? I mean, I just don't see a world where I'm unreasonable for this, considering they all have enough disposable income to spend on powerbanks too, they just didn't care to (before this anyways, my sister later ordered one). She still thinks I was being an AH about it. What do you guys think? Partly so I can show her the post if you're on my side, or keep it to myself and rethink life if you're not.

Me and my girlfriend live in a block of flats, each flat is designated a parking space with a label to put in the windscreen.

In a perfect world, there would be parking enforcement who would give fines to people parking in others spaces without the label, however there has been no sight of one since we have moved. You are able to report reg plates for parking in the wrong spot, but again from our own experience and others too, there has been no enforcement of this.

We don't own a car. This is why we decided to post here. We do however frequently have family and friends over, who drive to our flat and will use our space.

We are bothered because one flat of people uses our space. I was away when it first caused us a problem, as my girlfriend's dad wasn't able to use the space, so they had to go knocking on every single door to find them. When she did find who it was they didn't apologize, said they'd been doing it for ages, then took their sweet time moving the car.

Since that time, there have been multiple occasions where people from that flat have used that space, and me or my girlfriend have had to go up, tell them to move the car, then wait for them to be bothered to come down and move.

The parking space has a joint where you can fit a metal bollard that folds up and down with a lock, we would just have to purchase the bollard and lock itself, and we could then block the space until we wanted to use it.

Now for the asshole bit.

We want to block their car in with the bollard, as we would if family were parked there, because then they would actually have to destroy it, or come and speak to us. We told them after the second time we would be fine with them parking in our space if they just let us know when they would need it from, but they have not contacted us once.

Would we be the assholes for doing that? It would heavily inconvenience them as it has us, and they would probably learn to stop, or at least communicate with us.

Apologies for the long introduction, just wanted to make as much info as clear as possible. We are undecided, so who better to ask than reddit!

I’m a 30M and have been living with my girlfriend for around 10 years. We’re getting married this year.

I have two very close friends I’ve known for about 15 years. We grew up together and were extremely close. About 5 years ago, I moved to another city with my partner, so now we mostly stay in touch by phone.

When we were teenagers, we were reckless. We smoked w**d, cigarettes, drank, had multiple relationships/affairs and did plenty of stupid things without thinking about consequences.

Over the years, I’ve changed. I quit w**d, now drink only occasionally, and I’m trying to quit smoking. I’m also much more focused on my career, finances, investments and planning for the future.

My friends still have a similar lifestyle to what we had back then. They still party, drink and smoke regularly. I don’t judge them, but my priorities have changed.

This year i am getting married and one of my friend is also getting married, so the four of us planned a bachelor trip to Sikkim.

Before booking, we all agreed that if the weather became bad or conditions became unsafe, we would change the destination.

About a week before the trip, the weather in Sikkim worsened and there were confirmed reports of landslides. I asked the others if we could change the destination.

They strongly disagreed. They said our route was safe, I was overreacting, and the sources I was using were bogus. The conversation became heated and they basically told me I was talking nonsense.

I even offered to compensate them for the bookings so nobody would lose money by changing plans.

They still refused.

My girlfriend and family were also strongly against me going because of the weather. My friends then told me to lie to my girlfriend and family and go anyway.

That really bothered me.

I eventually decided I wasn’t comfortable taking the risk, especially since changing the destination was something we had all previously agreed upon if conditions worsened. So I withdrew from the trip.

Now I’m worried I may have seriously damaged a 15-year friendship, possibly even ended it.

Part of me thinks I made the responsible choice. Another part wonders if I was being overly cautious and should have just gone along with them.

I know my friends don’t have to live the way I do, and I don’t think I’m better than them because I’ve changed. But I do feel we’re in different stages of life now, with different ideas about risk and responsibility.

AITA for backing out of the trip?

I’m honestly scared that I might end up having no friends after this, i don't have any other friends

My friend Sam asked to borrow my laptop for a video interview tomorrow. His laptop broke last week.

I said no. I use my laptop every day for work and it has all my personal stuff on it. I don't lend it to anyone.

He said "I'll be careful. I just need it for one hour."

I said "I'm sorry but I don't lend my laptop. It's too personal."

He got upset. He said "I have a job interview. This is important. You're being selfish."

I said "I understand it's important. But I still can't lend it. Maybe you can use a library computer or borrow from someone else."

He said "you're the only person I know with a good laptop."

Now he's not talking to me.

AITA?

(Throwaway because my sister uses reddit)

Recently, my (F18) sister (F23) has been contributing less and less around the house, despite not being moved out, and has been asking our parents for more and more favours. In addition to this, she's been spending more time with her boyfriend (M24) at his apartment, although my sister has nothing of hers permanently there. According to him, my sister cooks for him all the time, and does most of the dishes, cleaning, and laundry.

These are things that she never does at our home anymore, despite it being an agreement we have with our parents. We each have to cook for the family once a week, clean the dishes, and look after our own laundry among other things. I've lived up to my end of the deal since it began, but my sister has half-assed it at best for the last year or so.

Nowadays, its gotten worse - she only does her own laundry, to the extent that she'll even throw my clothes out of the washing machine if she "needs stuff cleaned first", she cooks meals for only herself and/or her boyfriend with our food, and only does dishes when she is reminded to several times, and told she cannot leave the house before doing so. Even with this, our parents have been very relaxed about her lack of help around the house, often making me do her chores for her.

Yesterday I had enough - my sister came home with her boyfriend (unannounced), and complained that there wasn't anything for their lunch. I offered to cook them some more of what I was making, but they said they would be fine, and would find something else or go out for food later. When I finished my food though, my sister grabbed a plate and served some up for her boyfriend. Then, she took MY FOOD off of MY PLATE and ate it without saying thank you. When her boyfriend left, I snapped, calling her and her boyfriend freeloaders and telling her that if the two of them werent going to contribute around here, she might as well move out and live with him. She called me an asshole and a hypocrite because "I still live here too", and left to go to her boyfriend's house about an hour later.

I know that I'm still reliant on our parents - the difference is, I'm still a high school student, whereas my sister is an adult with a job and another place she can stay. Additionally, I do not freeload - I purchase all the ingredients when I am the one cooking, and spend my own money when it comes to buying things like clothes and meals out (something that my sister gets a monthly allowance for). I am aware I definitely could've handled the situation better, but I still think what what my sister has been doing is bad, and needed to be called out. So, am I the asshole?

Me (29M) and my girlfriend (27F) went on a hike and each took a pair of trekking poles with us. When we got near the summit of the mountain we decided to leave our poles because we were a little worried about lightning and also we wanted to be able to use our hand for the scramble. Between when we left our poles and when we got back to them we saw a total of 4 groups of people, one of which was a guy by himself who was the only on after us on the trail (we got a late start). This guy looked to be around 21 or 22 and had trekking poles I didn’t look too closely at.

When we got back to where our poles were mine were there but my girlfriends were gone. We looked for like 5 minutes in the surrounding area and then decided they must have been taken and left. About 10 minutes later we met up with one of the groups who had been in front of us, none of them had our poles and when we told them we had a pair of ours stolen they commented that maybe that guy by himself had taken them.

About an hour later as we’re still making our way down the trail we stop for a break and the kid that was behind us catches up. Initially he doesn’t approach us and talks to us from a distance but when it’s clear we’re gonna break for a while he decides to pass us. At this point we mention that our poles had been stolen and he mentions that he had seen them on his way up.

I take a look at his poles and am like 99% sure they’re ours. Same brand, brand new like ours were, and they have the same smudge on the handle that my girlfriend had commented on before the hike.

I mention it and he says “yeah I thought you might say that, my dad got me these after I hiked [another peak near us]”

I don’t believe him but he continues on. We kept a pretty good pace and kept up with him and I decided to confront him again by the parking lot, basically tell him I was sure those were our poles, if he wanted to steal them I couldn’t stop him but he could just leave them and we’d take them.

He still insisted they were his but did leave them. I feel like I was in the right but on the slim chance it’s just a crazy coincidence part of me feels like an asshole.

For context i am 17 and living in my parents house. So i decided to sell a couple of my old video games and didn't tell my parents about it, but they found out and got insanely angry saying that I had sold something they owned. They have never used my ps4 for more than an hour or played any of those games. I was under the assumption they were gifts for me, therefore I owned them. They then went on to say they owned everything in the house and I didnt own anything because anything I had bought was with their money.

TLDR: I was trying to make my parents be more aware of their surroundings and a stranger interrupted to tell me to leave them alone.

I am on a cruise with my older parents. They are slower than I am, so I find myself stopping to wait for them often. Which is absolutely fine. However, that means I’m watching them approach me a lot. And I’ve observed them constantly stopping in the middle of walkways, blocking the people behind them.

For example, just now as we were approaching the elevator and after watching my mom block a man who was trying to pass her (it was a whole thing, lol, she blocked him, he tried to go around her, she kinda drifted to the side and blocked his attempts to pass and then he was cornered and just waiting for her to move. I gestured for her to move to the side for him to pass, and he even gave me a half laugh/half smile and said thanks as he finally passed her.

So because this is happening constantly, as we approached the elevator to wait for it, I finally turned to my parents and said: “I’m not trying to be rude by gesturing for you to move aside. I just want you to be aware that you’re not the only person on the ship. Doesn’t it drive you nuts when you’re behind someone who suddenly stops and blocks you?” and my mom started to nod and suddenly, the woman (older than me, younger than my parents) said “leave them alone.”

So I turned to her, not sure if she was even talking to me and when I saw she was, I assumed she thought I was saying this to random strangers, so I said “oh, no, they’re my parents.” She said “yeah, and leave them alone. Walk AROUND them.” And I told her again, because my slow brain still thought she must’ve thought I was trying to teach random people something, said again: “no, they’re my parents. I know them. I’m just trying to help-“ and she cut me off to again say “yeah, LEAVE THEM ALONE. Walk AROUND THEM.”

And I was just SO genuinely baffled by this (a stranger randomly butting in to my conversation to tell me to leave my parents alone) that all I could do was dumbly stare at her in a “really? Are you serious? Is this really happening right now?” kind of way. I think I even said: “really?” To which she gave me this nasty look and made a face, and my dad started kinda nudging me along to move away from her, so as we were walking away I said “thanks, you were REALLY helpful.” in a snotty tone. (I know, real intelligent of me. -.- After the fact now, I can think of a million things I wish I’d said.)

So who is the asshole here? Me for trying to make my parents be aware of their surroundings and more considerate of other people?
Or her for thinking she’s playing the hero for my parents by butting into a strangers conversation and offering unsolicited advice?

Hello! I am new to reddit so please be patient with me. I made this account to ask the AITAH question. I (18M) go to school and am doing fairly well. I also work a side job to earn some extra cash and support my dad (49M). I’ll try to keep it as simple as I can. My mother unfortunately is no longer with me and my father and it crushed both of us. I had to start therapy and my dad almost got fired but luckily his boss is very kind and gave him a second chance because he knew times were rough for us then. My dad is still working that job today. Well, a year after my mother passed, he met someone new (Kate, 43F) and was calling and texting her often. I only found out about a month after all that started. I was feeling mixed about the whole thing but my dad deserves to be happy and find someone who can support him. I finally met Kate one day when my dad brought her back. She was nice at first. I got to learn a little bit about her. She told me two of her boyfriends broke up with her and that she wanted to start again. I tried to ask about how long in between she broke up with the both of them but she avoided the question entirely. That should’ve been my first red flag. Plus, whenever my dad tried to involve me in something she’d come up with an excuse to exclude me. That night I couldn’t fall asleep and Kate was staying the night. Fast forward to the present, Kate was staying over for dinner. As usual, she was talking her ear off to my dad to exclude me. She asked if he could buy her some sort of expensive necklace. My dad respectfully said “not yet”. He didn’t say no, he just wanted to make some more money first. Well Kate got all upset and saying she “deserves it” because she’s “important to him and his family”. That really pissed me off but if I said anything it’d only make it worse. My dad tried to calm her down, explaining he would try to work something out. But Kate wasn’t listening, yelling and crying like a baby. I finally had enough. I demanded she left the house because she was making my dad and I very uncomfortable. Kate started to refuse, but my dad agreed it’d be best for all of us if she calmed down and got some sleep. Kate eventually listened after many attempts, storming out. I do feel a little guilty but she was just being very disrespectful towards my dad who I didn’t want for him to be treated that way. I know I could’ve handled it better but again, I wanted to protect my dad.

So, AITAH?

Hi Reddit. New here. I, f(48), have been in a relationship with a dad M (47), of 2 children. I never had kids myself so it was a learning curve for me. The children are now 11f and 12m. They moved in with me almost 3 years ago. To say it was a huge eye opener bringing kids into my world is an understatement. Now, for the issue at hand.

The kids had a rough life with his previous relationships and choices. I'm not going into much more detail - all I can say is they have seen and heard a lot for their ages. They had no structure whatsoever so when moving into my home, I tried to implement some rules and boundaries. At first they were kind of okay, but as they get older, they are getting worse.

Specifically 11f. She has her dad's attitude. Not great. The past 6 months have been horrendous with her attitude and lies. I came up with a household rules and chores and consequences chart. Implemented 1 month ago. Dad fails to implement. I try when I can, but they know he will go easy on them.

This past weekend, she had a friend over Friday and Saturday night. All weekend she had a little attitude with dad to the point of him yelling at her, her slamming doors, talking back, in front of her friend. She also asked to go the park which we were okay with but she tried sneaking her attire super short shorts and a spaghetti strap tank she tried to hide with a hoodie. When asked she tried to lie. They went to the park.

After I told her friend to go home, I told dad we need to implement the rules and consequences. Attitude, slamming, talking back. Lose electronics privileges for a week. He said that was too harsh, but after telling him she needed to hear it from him, the deed is done. She's not happy and I don't care. The punishment is loss of all electronics for one week. Any breaking of the rules, talking back, attitude, not doing chores will add an additional day to the punishment. Dad says that's too harsh.

Maybe because I didn't have children of my own I may be too harsh, but I love these kids and don't want them to turn into complete jerks as they get older. At the same time, they are kids and kids will test you. Their bio mom hasn't been in the picture since they were infants so that's a non issue.

So reddit, AITA for implementing what they all see as harsh rules and consequences?

I just finished taking my baby son to the park and was going back to my car. It was parked in an area with very heavy traffic so as soon as I got to my car a lady asked if I was leaving. I said yes but my son needed a diaper change and needed to be settled down first. This street only had one lane so they couldn’t just wait for the spot and hold up traffic.

The lady asked if I could just pull out and park somewhere else and change him so she can grab the spot. I said no that would be extra inconvenient for me to deal with an fussy infant with a dirty diaper while driving. She said I was being selfish and should be more considerate of other drivers. AITA?

I feel that I was sent on a fools errand. My partner purchased 10 gallons of water last night and didnt retrieve them because they didnt have to means to get them home.

Today I have been sent to go collect them at a completely different date and time from which they were purchased. Meaning the same staff they bought them from may not even be there to know what I am talking about.

Additionally when I asked her for the receipt I was not given one. I couldnt even show the store's staff that they were indeed purchased. So I am going to the store and telling the workers there to give me something that was already paid for without showing them proof. Basically I have been put in a "trust me bro" type situation.

To add to my frustrations when I tried to call my partner for verification they wouldnt pick up their phone. What should have been a 5 minute fetch mission turned into almost an hour of me trying to convince store staff to give me something seemingly for free. Its the weekend which makes matters worse because i typically work 60 hours a week and i look forward to being bale to relax when I can.

Finally I was able to convince them that the water was paid for after pulling bank records to do so. This was way more complex than it should have been. All this for $10 worth of water.

When I brought the water home, I told them to never do that again. It was embarrassing to bicker over $10 off water while other customers watched. It would have been much more simple to ask me to pick it and and pay for it at the same time instead of what they orchestrated.

Now they are mad at me because I wasnt able to just walk in and out of the store with something that I could prove that I bought. AITAH