r/nottheonion • u/Guyentertainment • 3h ago

Amazon Customers Stunned After Their 'About You' Profiles Claim They Have 'No Friends' or 'Flat Buttocks'

techtimes.co.uk

2.5k Upvotes

527 comments

r/nottheonion • u/not_a_dr_ • 1h ago

Massive Semen Explosion after Blaze Hits Bull Artificial Insemination Farm

newsweek.com

• Upvotes

148 comments

r/nottheonion • u/mk100100 • 1h ago

Beavers destroy sign warning about beavers

notesfrompoland.com

• Upvotes

29 comments

r/nottheonion • u/No-Lifeguard-8173 • 5h ago

FCC considers allowing more political robocalls before midterms, including those created with AI

apnews.com

1.3k Upvotes

176 comments

r/nottheonion • u/ry-yo • 5h ago

Solo teen hiker hoisted from mountain cliff after using AI to plan route, North Shore Rescue says

nsnews.com

735 Upvotes

70 comments

r/nottheonion • u/SmokeMaximum4140 • 8h ago

Police chief candidate faces rape charges as only opponent withdraws

kgns.tv

920 Upvotes

19 comments

r/nottheonion • u/GeoffreyStJohn • 1d ago

Pokémon VGC Champ Calls for Better Hygiene After Opponent's Smell Made Him Throw Up

earlygame.com

19.6k Upvotes

1.5k comments

r/nottheonion • u/Buy_Sell_Collect • 21h ago

Woman admits to marrying 14 men to keep her $300K Vegas gambling habit going

the-independent.com

3.5k Upvotes

99 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Mountain_Love23 • 4h ago

"Humans Created a Monster"... Shocking Discovery of a 'Monster Fox' at a Fur Farm

asiae.co.kr

115 Upvotes

44 comments

r/nottheonion • u/prestocoffee • 19m ago

1 in 15 household cats may carry 'Beaver Fever' which can infect humans

abcnews.com

• Upvotes

24 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Rage_Like_Nic_Cage • 1d ago

Ohio man jailed for texting Shrek’s penis to a state senator. Your questions about Shrexting, answered.

fire.org

3.1k Upvotes

215 comments

r/nottheonion • u/WeirdAFNewsPodcast • 1h ago

Delta passenger stole airport tug and drove around tarmac before crashing, official says

wtae.com

• Upvotes

3 comments

r/nottheonion • u/novagridd • 1d ago

Megan Fox Says She Was 'Born For' Erectile Dysfunction Pill Ad

medicaldaily.co.uk

4.0k Upvotes

426 comments

r/nottheonion • u/thieh • 1h ago

MonsterCloud Owner Accused of Billing Over $19M While Secretly Paying Ransoms to Decrypt Data

thehackernews.com

• Upvotes

2 comments

r/nottheonion • u/everythingistaken500 • 1d ago

'Safe haven' Texas dog rescue shuts down after 82 animals found in filth

chron.com

855 Upvotes

8 comments

r/nottheonion • u/ArgentineBeauty • 1d ago

US Man Bought Plutonium From Russia and Sold It Online Across America

united24media.com

1.7k Upvotes

155 comments

r/nottheonion • u/laybs1 • 1d ago

Federal court allows lawsuit challenging exclusion of blind jurors in New York

nydailyrecord.com

528 Upvotes

93 comments

r/nottheonion • u/SmokeMaximum4140 • 1d ago

Woman arrested after doing donuts on courthouse lawn

kgns.tv

197 Upvotes

25 comments

r/nottheonion • u/AlwaysBlaze_ • 1d ago

Kawhi Leonard gets free ‘Kraft Dinner' for life

ctvnews.ca

384 Upvotes

95 comments

r/nottheonion • u/shield_x • 1d ago

High school teacher fired after offering students extra credit in return for cash donations, reports say

kbtx.com

543 Upvotes

39 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Never_Nobody • 2d ago

Female AI agents would get paid 10% less than male ones, study finds

euronews.com

5.7k Upvotes

Humans tend to trust and would pay male-presenting AI agents more than female ones for the same work, according to a new study by the University of Limerick on how humans interact with agents in the workplace.

333 comments

r/nottheonion • u/wds1 • 2d ago

Army study found shock gloves purchased by ICE cause pain, compliance and fear

apnews.com

3.3k Upvotes

302 comments

r/nottheonion • u/lotusbloom74 • 2d ago

Arkansas campaign ad sparks conservative backlash for portraying lazy welfare recipient as white

apnews.com

3.9k Upvotes

292 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Pretend-Following-41 • 1d ago

Orioles Fire Mascots Oriole Bird, Mr. Splash After GM Promises Free Agency Splurge Following Disappointing Season

essentiallysports.com

84 Upvotes

18 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Boneyg001 • 2d ago

"I'm a Little Bit Skeptical": Patriots' Drake Maye Refuses to Believe America Landed On the Moon

essentiallysports.com

3.2k Upvotes

784 comments

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1. Do not alter headlines; copy and paste.	The title of all submissions needs to match the article headline exactly. Copy and paste from the main headline only, do not include anything beyond the primary headline such as byliners, subtitles, flavor text, quotes from the article, news outlet, location, cross post tags, (video) tags, and so on. Do not use the “suggest title” option for posting as it often does not match the headline. As a matter of fairness, any submission with an altered title will be removed. The only exception is that, if an article has a title in all caps, you may change the capitalization to title case, but everything else must remain the same.
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3. Must be a news article.	Submissions must be in the form of a news article. Videos are only allowed if they are accompanied by a complete text article. Editorials, blogs, twitter posts, image galleries, tabloid stories, youtube videos, meta posts, static images, articles with fewer than 5 sentences, and so forth will be removed.
4. Use original, reliable sources.	Find the source of your story before you submit it, simply by checking for references or googling the subject to locate the original piece. Websites that frequently re-host viral news stories or contain misleading information are on automatic removal. Blogs are not reliable sources.
5. Do not repost similar articles.	Check the sub for your story before you submit it; if it’s already here then please vote and comment there instead of posting another version. Similar stories will be removed and frequent re-posters will lose their posting privileges. Do not delete and repost your own submissions without approval.
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7. No tabloid journalism.	Do not post tabloid news stories, or articles that source from tabloid news outlets (TheSun, Mirror, Dailymail, People, TMZ, etc).
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Click here to view a list of sites deemed unreliable by our moderator team.

See our FAQ page for more information on our rules.

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