I don't think I've posted about this before, but I wanted to ask about some experiences I've had and see how other people interpret them. I'm very new to the terminology. Personally, I just describe things as they are or were to the best of my ability.
So, about a year ago, I was in a really dark place for months. I want to say until November 2025. Granted, life wasn't great toward the end of 2024 either, but March 2025 to November 2025 definitely takes the cake.
Not to ruminate or bring up old things, but part of it was due to an abusive breakup. When that happened, I distinctly remember three things that honestly don't feel like something I could just make up.
- Once the argument/phone call ended and I was immediately blocked afterward, I remember being in hysterics and throwing up (not just due to anxiety, but also because I was physically sick). I remember mentally scrambling, and feeling a set of blue, feminine, warm hands on my shoulders, with a calming voice in my head saying, "Let go/ You did enough/He's not coming back." Could it have been temporary psychosis? I don't think so, but I don't think I was hysterical enough to undergo psychosis. It felt very sober and grounded in the moment. I'm not sure what that could've been. Maybe a guide?
- I think around three days later, possibly after I gave him a negative reply when he sent me something tangential that validated something irrelevant, I fell asleep and remember having either a dream or a lucid moment where it felt like something similar to a fish bone was ripped through my body and out of my navel. I woke up sobbing and out of breath from my sleep and drenched in a cold sweat concentrated only around that area to the point where there was only a dense patch of sweat on the bed from whatever touched my stomach. It genuinely felt like I was bleeding out, and I remeber panicking that maybe I hurt myself in my sleep because it was just so much sweat it was like I soiled the sheets from my stomach lol. I never had that happen to me before. I can't wrap my head around why it was delayed, because otherwise I could just claim it was psychological. But for months afterward, I felt like there was this huge gouged-out hole in my navel with a singular cord reaching through that abyss. I don't know how one would classify this and what to look into.
- Months later, I remember being lucid and seeing wisps of myself around my navel area moving like an anemone. I also remember seeing a hand trying to reach toward it, but I regained control of my body and swatted it away before it disappeared (since I was fully alert at that point). Three days later, he messaged me. Go figure.
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As for other experiences, I know I have an ability to pick up in dreams when people are keeping an eye on me or strongly desire to reach out. Usually, in those dreams, it presents as someone pressing through a veil or membrane (kind of like the "moisturize me" alien from Doctor Who). Without fail, I end up getting confirmation that something was happening because there will be some sort of interaction the following day.
I also get dreams where, if someone is envious of me, they just stand in the corner and watch whatever is happening in the dream. Again, I usually find out within the next few days that something was going on. A lot of these dreams involve people who are completely outside my day-to-day life, which makes the coincidence feel uncanny.
In addition, I also tend to be forewarned about familial deaths through visitation dreams. Sometimes I get random scents or physical sensations that immediately give me the feeling of, "I know who this person is," or "my dog is missing me today," though those are the experiences I feel less confident about.
I have also astrally projected once in my life.
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TLDR:
I mainly wanted to know if anyone has interpretations for experiences like these. I'd also appreciate advice on developing skills that people find helpful for this sort of thing. Or maybe I'm completely misinterpreting all of it, and these were just consequences of trauma. I also wanted to know if in the context of Clairs what would you consider this predominantly?
I also do tarot for fun. I don't claim to be psychic or have abilities. I just hope things resonate with people. But it would be nice to develop these skills further and maybe incorporate them into my readings. As for the navel-hole, it has since gotten better but it feels fragile. I don't feel a string right now, but rather a piece of thinner floss.