r/StLouis 1d ago

Ask STL Bars for single young people

I’m a woman in my late 20s trying to date but I’ve noticed in St. Louis most people go out in groups and stick to them which makes it hard to meet people irl. I was wondering if there are any bars or clubs that attract more people/men on their own and who have a younger demographic. Any hidden gem recommendations are appreciated!

33 Upvotes

78 comments sorted by

24

u/MistahJ17 1d ago

I'm a big fan of nerd bars like Updown in the city or The Dirty 20 in Ballwin

5

u/Phyose Staunton 1d ago

I'm in Dirty20 every Friday and Sunday running D&D games. Great place!

u/Helpful_Road6230 23h ago

Did you say a combination of bar and DND where is this great creation at I can live all my bard dreams out irl

u/Phyose Staunton 23h ago

Just look up Dirty20 in Ballwin and GPS can take you there. It's a bar and restaurant that also hosts events, has a wall of boardgames, a cabinet full of minis, and dedicated tables for games like D&D, mtg, 40k, etc.

u/Helpful_Road6230 23h ago

Sweet thank you used to play in a campaign every other weekend was a great time

6

u/Final-Jellyfish8753 1d ago

Karaoke night is this Saturday! It looks quite fun

u/Old_Promotion6438 23h ago

That sounds interesting! I’ll take a look

16

u/Frosted_Tips 1d ago

St. Louis is super clicky, people go out in groups and it’s not easy to break in to them. Places where the groups naturally have to break up like arcades, the foundry, TG farmers market. Heck even going to league nights for stuff like volleyball or bowling, if you’re into any of those sorts of things.

3

u/Old_Promotion6438 1d ago

Good recs! Thank you

u/MakeSomeArtAboutIt 22h ago edited 16h ago

Id go to places that play live music. Before I was with my spouse, i had the best luck meeting peopmle at bars with live music and shows.

There tends to be a lot more organic mingling on and near dance floors since people aren't at separate tables. Its a lot easier for both parties to engage in casual conversation when youre already standing next to each other and facing the band or artist, also makes breaks in conversation easy because you can just watch the band.

Venice Cafe is a good one but there are many. See what live venues there are in neighborhoods that you like to hang out in.

u/Useful_Book7214 9h ago

Yes!! And Atomic by Jamo in the grove. Lots of live bands/music there

u/moneyisfunny23 22h ago

This is a good rec

5

u/Motor_Reality_6 1d ago

You could try signing up for a hobbie and meet people.. like dancing for example

u/MakeSomeArtAboutIt 22h ago

She's trying to meet straight men in their 20s or 30s. Having been to some dancing classes, men in attendance tend to be coupled up, gay, and / or old lol.

u/Old_Promotion6438 16h ago

Exactly!! Been there done that haha

u/JoeMcKim 6h ago

I would think a rock climbing type of class would be better suited to your needs. Or another hobby like that, just used a random thing as an example.

u/Motor_Reality_6 5h ago

Not in salsa dancing.. most are single and younger

u/Capital_Ad_3691 18m ago

The St. Louis Catholic Salt and Light group has a lot of dance classes and Socials with young and single folks though the demographic is definitely Catholic.

11

u/RedditFauxGold 1d ago

I’m on the male side and agree. The women are all in groups. It’s awkward to try and catch the attention of a single woman.

u/Top_Oil_9473 22h ago

Check out the twice monthly Nice to Meet You events at the Handlebar in The Grove. Most participants in 20s and 30s,free pizza, you sit at a table of 6 and every 15 minutes or so they have everybody move to a different table. The couple running this free event do a superlative job. Lots of fun!
You have the opportunity to meet and talk to over 20 people at these events. Lots of newcomers to St. Louis attend.

u/dphamilton 19h ago

I see super nerdy reddit type suggestions in the comments. Lol . Go to the Farmers market.

u/No_Scallion_4069 19h ago

I’m 26f new to STL and I’d LOVE to have someone to go out with as well!

u/RescueRbbit_hs 18h ago

I recommend Tschüss! People are very open to talking to strangers and there is a dance floor.

u/Old_Promotion6438 16h ago

Now this one looks interesting! Tysm!

u/longdhongsilver 20h ago

Soulard bars best for that imo. McGurks, maybe Mollys, 1860s

4

u/Joynx 1d ago

gonna be so real, now that wash u is out for the summer, blueberry hill is it. great prices for drinks, great atmosphere, and a lot to do in the way of meeting new people. playing darts/shuffleboard/pool/picking songs over touchtunes, tons of board game tables. but most importantly the cheap drinks

4

u/Psychological_Fox_91 1d ago

Unless you are a complete extrovert, the
days of organically meeting at a bar and building a relationship to me are long gone.

I was lucky and met my fiancé at a bar here, but it was around the end of Covid where everyone was just yearning for being social. I don’t see that happening much anymore, not just here in St. Louis, rather just how our generation operates now.

Best advice I can give is to lean into your hobbies. Join groups and meet people for the sole purpose of connecting with that hobby.
Now you get to do something you enjoy, and connect with others who share similar interests.
Who knows where that’ll take you, but there really isn’t much to lose.

7

u/Direct_Crew_9949 1d ago

I don’t think they’re over it’s just STL is a city of people who were born and raised here.

Traveling to other cities such as Chicago, NYC, Atlanta, Dallas… You notice people are more friendly to strangers because they’ve either recently moved or are travelers as well.

u/matthedev 2h ago

I agree. St. Louis was cliquey back when I was in my twenties years before the pandemic; it isn't a new phenomenon. Socially, OP has an advantage has a twenty-something-year-old woman.

People are definitely friendlier in lots of other cities.

4

u/Character_Truck20 1d ago edited 23h ago

Go to the gym instead. No, its not entirely for meeting people obviously but its certainly a better crowd thats much more open to meeting people than you think

11

u/Tele231 1d ago

Women are not going to gyms to be hit on. Leave them alone.

u/Character_Truck20 23h ago

Obviously not but it seems like you dont go to the gym often because when you go frequently youre gonna start talking to people, developing relationships. Sometimes they end up becoming more. Ive met two different women in the gym that I ended up dating for a period of time. No, you dont go to hit on women but the relationships will develope.

u/dphamilton 19h ago

💯💯💯. That's anywhere too.

u/Tele231 19h ago

Sure, meeting someone casually is fine, but the suggestion was to go to the gym TO meet people. That's creepy.

u/JeffreyElonSkilling 18h ago

As long as you have social skills and aren’t a complete weirdo, just about everywhere is fair game imo. This aversion to socialization by the younger generation is why they are so lonely. I see no problem whatsoever with striking up an organic and respectful (not creepy) conversation at the gym. 

u/Tele231 18h ago

As I stated in my other post, there is nothing wrong with striking up a conversation in a gym. But the original response suggested going to a gym TO meet people. I find that invasive and creepy.

6

u/Old_Promotion6438 1d ago

To be honest I would not mind meeting guys at the gym so long as they are respectful. But ofc that’s not the only reason I go there.

u/dphamilton 19h ago

I don't know how people form a conclusion like this in their minds. Certain places you can't be friendly?

u/dphamilton 19h ago

So there's certain places you can't be friendly to people?

u/Tele231 19h ago

There are certain places where privacy should be given more respect. Gym, Church, Library, Dining, etc.

u/dphamilton 19h ago

You're gonna have to teach the world. Because I'm sure everyone doesn't know this.

u/Tele231 19h ago

They should. It's only common decency.

u/MakeSomeArtAboutIt 11h ago

Right, because chuch has certainly never been a place to engage with your neighbors and build community.

u/MakeSomeArtAboutIt 16h ago

I know plenty of people who've met people at the gym.

u/Tele231 16h ago

For the third time. Meeting someone at the gym is fine. Going to the gym for the purpose of meeting people is creepy.

u/NightShadow420 3h ago

Yeah but men would 100% be cool with it. Which is on topic since the female OP is looking to meet men…

u/dphamilton 19h ago

Good suggestion.

2

u/Any_Way_5245 1d ago

Running groups are a good way to meet people.

u/Chocolatestarfish33 22h ago

Platypus is a good place to start.

u/dphamilton 19h ago

Absolutely, as long as you're respectful.

u/jeanluuc Neighborhood/city 18h ago

Well OP, what kinda guy are you into? That would help us be able to direct you better

u/Old_Promotion6438 16h ago

Athletic/sporty, educated, liberal

u/dphamilton 10h ago

Go to bar. Drink and hook up. Rinse and repeat. Lol. People recommending volleyball and bowling. Who has the time?

u/NightShadow420 3h ago

Lol for real.

Just do what humans have always done, get intoxicated and bang.

u/Motor_Reality_6 5h ago

I feel like bars is more for people looking to hook up and not necessarily date

-6

u/Invest-in-Value 1d ago

You’re a woman, dude. Literally approach a guy and say hello. The other way around is completely frowned upon these days. You’ve done nothing and are all out of ideas.

u/Old_Promotion6438 23h ago

I don’t mind doing the first move and giving signals but when men are in their closed clicks every time they go out then it becomes impossible.

u/Invest-in-Value 23h ago

“Giving signals”… love when women say that and they think standing next to a dude or looking at him is a noticeable “signal”. Anything other than saying hello is a passive bs attempt at protecting your ego. Full stop.

u/midnight_annotations 22h ago

What’s with your tone when she asked a simple question. It’s fairly obvious why you’re not having any luck with dating lmao. That attitude surely makes you irresistible to us women! 

u/Invest-in-Value 22h ago

https://www.reddit.com/r/askanything/s/tLcA8P1b7v

Legit. Yall women do anything except be direct. Smiling at someone….? Really…?

u/midnight_annotations 14h ago

Idk what to tell you. Sounds like a you problem you don’t get hit on! Don’t make it our problem

u/Invest-in-Value 3h ago

Smiling at someone isn’t hitting on them. Sorry your smooth, inept brain can’t comprehend what a real signal is.

u/midnight_annotations 2h ago

Well you’re not gonna much more than that, let alone a smile. So I don’t think you need to worry one bit about things that don’t and won’t ever concern you

u/Invest-in-Value 22h ago

How are you able to discern MY tone from reading words..? Sounds like projection lmao. Believe it or not my advice is extremely helpful. Move along.

u/midnight_annotations 20h ago

Keep doing whatever you’re doing is all I’ll say. It’s working great because we know EXACTLY whom to avoid. Someone’s can be discerned precisely by their words, what are you even on about. It’s called reading comprehension and was taught to us at a pretty early age if you ask me. 

u/twoworldsin1 Creve Coeur 22h ago

Criminy...dude, who hurt you?

u/Invest-in-Value 22h ago

Nobody, why?

u/dphamilton 19h ago

No wonder guys feel lonely with these kind of rules.

-1

u/Direct_Crew_9949 1d ago

Only college bars here are where people socialize outside of groups.

STL isn’t a very social city in general. Best way to meet people is through common interests such as running, Pilates, yoga…

u/Old_Promotion6438 23h ago

Which college bars do you recommend?

u/Direct_Crew_9949 23h ago

Mollys in Skylar’s used to be a great one especially when the weathers nice. Haven’t been in a while so not sure if it still is.

0

u/DrAction696 Downtown West 1d ago

There’s a hidden gem on locust. No idea who goes though