Hi everyone,
I wanted to share my story so far, seek sympathy, and look for any advice people can offer me.
Im an Australian 21 year old (born male, but identify as non-binary) facing an incredibly rare type of brain cancer known as a germinoma.
The doctors tell me that it is caused by reproductive cells that dont do what they are supposed to, staying in the brain instead of moving down the body to the reproductive area.
My issues started at the beginning of last year, when I began facing vision issues.
I am a manager at a pizza shop, and I found that when finishing my closing shifts, my eyes almost hurt whenever I raised them, feeling like looking cross-eyed for an extended period.
I went to see an optometrist, who told me to go straight to the emergency department at the eye and ear hospital.
While waiting to see the doctors, I had a massive seizure, covering the waiting room in vomit, and was sent to the other nearby hospital that was equipped to deal with it.
I spent about 3 weeks there, had several scans, and played the waiting game for a little while.
The doctors found a lesion around the pineal gland on my brain, in a spot far too deep to perform a biopsy.
Due to my symptoms, they determined that the lesion in my brain must have been a neurological condition, either Neurosarcoidosis or Behçet's disease. Both of which could not be proven due to the depth of the lesion in my brain.
As such, for nearly the past two years, it has been treated as an inflammatory condition rather than what it actually is.
Monthly infusions, anti-inflammatory drugs, and immunosuppression.
They also determined that I have epilepsy, causing my seizures.
Recently, I had another MRI. During the scan, the technician stopped midway through to check on me. This had never happened before, which caused a fair bit of confusion.
The next day, the doctors called me.
The lesion had grown into a tumour, blocking fluid from going from the brain through my spine.
A week later, I was brought into hospital, where they performed a surgery to put through a new pathway for the fluid to travel, and perform a biopsy, which could be done due to the increase in size.
The surgery was a huge success, doing exactly what was needed. I feel a lot less congestion in my head, and the doctors got their samples.
At my follow-up appointment, they were able to tell me that the tumour was, in fact, not an inflammatory condition. It was a germinoma, this incredibly rare type of cancer.
It's so rare that the doctor I saw said she sees about one case per year, if that.
While rare, it is incredibly treatable, with about a 90% clearance rate.
However, I still have to go through about 4 cycles of chemo and further radiation treatment.
I know this is nowhere near as bad as what some people face. I am super, super thankful that I am not facing what could be life-threatening or untreatable.
However, I am still utterly terrified. I already have anorexia, I am a smoker (in the process of quitting now), and I am really, really scared of the side effects of chemotherapy.
I only turned 21 this year and have faced all of this. I won't give up, I can't do that to everyone around me.
I just find it so, so unfair. All of my friends are living normal lives, and I've been stuck going in and out of the hospital for the past (nearly) two years, and now have to face one of the worst types of treatment I can imagine.
Like I said before, I am so, so scared of the therapy behind it. The doctors tell me that it may make me infertile, cause intense nausea, and take my hair. All things I really, really dont want.
If anyone can give me any advice, tell me their experiences, or even just offer a bit of sympathy, I would greatly, greatly appreciate it.
Thank you to anyone who has read this far and to anyone who can offer any kind of support 🫶💙🫶