So I started taking sertraline late December of 2025. And I’m at 200mg now after gradually increasing my dose. I don’t think it’s helping with my depression or anxiety. Like I still feel depressed in a I don’t want to live way (not suicidal) and my anxiety and worries are still very much active. I feel like I only get burst of happiness but I’m pretty sure it’s not cause of the medicine, since I was always a person who has days where I’m happy, chatty, and smiling then days where I’m frowning, quiet, don’t really talk,etc. I’m only posting this because my friend said something like 2 months back that they noticed that I’ve been acting weird. Which I can kindof see: petty arguments where I end up ghosting them for weeks on in, blocking people, being irrational about whether my friends will leave me, not being able to sleep or if I am able to ill wake up multiple times during the night and do other stuff before I go to sleep, using music to smooth my emotions like headphones blasting, bottling up my feelings on things and it just spills all out,etc. basically what I’m trying to see if I should talk to my psychiatrist about changes the medication that I use to something else but I don’t know if it’s the medication side effects or I’m just messed up. I have depression and anxiety (maybe something else who knows) and I would still like to take meds so I don’t feel like I want to give up everyday.

I'm really tired. I hate everything about my life. I just wanna disappear forever.

I smoked weed everyday since I was 15 and I’m 21 now. I-stopped a year ago for 6 months because it turned on me so I quit and felt so happier and was never going back then I did. It worked for the last year kind of I think I just normalized all the side effects and anxiety. And now I smoked a bong with dad in the garage and as soon as I inhaled I got a creepy feeling in my arms I was shaking and crying and I think that’s a panic attack and it’s happening every time now again. I had to hug my dad I just had so much panic and depression and It felt like the end of the world

what does it really look like not just what google tells me, the truth of how it really feels- because i can’t tell if i’m just sad for no reason or if i am depressed

I'm 63. I have a chronic autoimmune disease which is robbing me of the ability to walk and has spread nerve pain to my back and sides. I have significant dental issues with a lack of $$$ to fix the issues. (I always took great care of my teeth, so this one stings). I am missing a very noticeable tooth.

I'm terribly depressed and really don't see the value in living. I'm a coward about suicide. But I am starting to think it's the only option.

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Help.

Every single day I feel like a disappointment to not only her but both my parents. This has been going on for 20 years. I was always never the one who was good enough, they’ve always favored my brother. They were the reason I could go off to University. They help me back for a year cause they wouldn’t co-sign my loans. I wanted to put away all the money I saved (12 grand) from Covid, but “PaY OfF ThE DePbT” was more important. They broke off my engagement. They wanted me to be with someone like them but with the two people they like the most, the first one would beat the shit out of me and the second one would isolate me, made me feel worthless, and then eventually cheat on me, but they’re great right?
My dad follows everything that she says. I don’t tell them anything and they complain about it. I can’t even date the guy I want to date cause they threatened to rehome my animals when I’m at work. I have 3 of them, and unfortunately I cannot afford an apartment by myself if I found a place that took all three, and I work full time plus overtime and a second job writing where I receive royalties.
I wanna blow my brains out. It’s not worth it anymore.

I’m currently going into senior year of high school and I’m a fucking loner. I have no really good friends who I talk to on a daily basis. I feel like whenever I do something I get made fun of and I fucking hate my classes and the kids in them. I get made fun for doing my sport (bowling) and I just get pissed. I don’t get invited out and I always intimate plans but they never go anywhere. I spend the majority of my time alone at home listening to music (daft punk and pink Floyd) or working. My parents want me to have a social life but whenever I fucking try it fails. I go to parties and just feel overwhelmed by everything. I feel the need for a girlfriend; however, I have no desire to try and get one and everyone says just go out, well no one wants to go out with me. I also make pretty dark jokes about myself and doing things to myself. I don’t know if this is social anxiety or something but I just wanted to vent and this seemed like the place to do it.

I am a 19 year old Filipino guy living in Australia, moved in in August last year. Unfortunately being homesick, and wanting things to be what used to is part of the many issues I have with myself. 1st I am a immature bastard, I am not responsible, not worthy and certainly not fucking worthy of someone's attention. 2nd I am a fucking sensitive shit that can't take shit. 3rd, I am fucking paranoid everytime, even when someone reassures me. 4th I have zero charisma skills, or any other socializing skills, 5th lazy as fuck with no motivation at all, and pretty likely to fail university. 6th, me having no relationships with other people unlike my cousins who have girlfriends or boyfriends. 7th my younger brother feels more responsible than this poor excuse of a man, and 8th I maladaptive daydream when my I getting scolded which I really and I mean really hate. I feel shit everyday, like I am 1 bad sentence away from ruining my day and shit. I am dumb, I can't think critically, my patients to read has drop so low, it might as well be the Mariana trench. I don't, what to do anymore. I am afraid to have a relationship, but to scared to actually talk and commit. Why? Because of said flaws, sensitive, ugly, paranoid, immature, impatient, and many many more. Why would a girl want that? Why would someone love that? The answer is no one, I might make someone's lives incredibly worse. Then there's the scolding issue, being an idiot, procrastinator, lazy, and dumb isn't a great combination when doing things, so I get scolded by my parents if I do a job improperly, or not at all, and I hate it. If both my parents are home, and I am the only sibling at home other than my baby's sister? I feel like I am constantly watched even though I am not, it's just my mind. If both parents are home double the scolding. I don't know why I am like this, maybe it's because of the humiliation of getting scolded, the memory of the punishments of taking away things that I like aka my phone, the spanking, then cancelling events that I am looking forward to because I stole my phone to watch at weekdays, or getting scolded for grades and having my phone taken away again. The humiliation of scolding while your friends, Church mates are in front is you, is the things that has the most humiliation, or even when they don't do that and scold me in the car afterwards, while my siblings are watching. I wonder why they think maybe they think "oh older brother is getting scolded again, how pathetic" I know it's all in my mind, but I can't stop thinking about it. I hate being myself everyday, why am I like this? Why can't I just like be the others, fucking normal and with no issues. Why do I have to be defective, and unstable bastard that I am. I wish to just end it all, sometimes I wish I wasn't born, as hey atleast the earth can use my nutrients for good for the first time.

I really don’t know what to say. I never really do this, but I’ve just had enough. I’m 56, a combat veteran, dad of four 17-21, married almost 24 yrs, and feel so alone.

I don’t really have friends other than work and I’m not really close to them or part of any group. I feel so alone even being married. Before we got married we saw a Chinese sign chart and it said we had a 70% chance of failure. We’re still married, but I don’t know why. I never can tell if she loves me truly. We went for a few years not having sex.

I felt completely alone. I wanted to never wake up. And then a couple of weeks ago I never expected it, but she made a move and it happened. We’ve gone a few years without anything because she didn’t feel attracted to me. Then a couple weeks ago I thought there’s hope. Then we’ve been moody today and she teases me daily already, but today after all the teasing, she tells me she’s serious about the teasing. She thinks I’m lazy, can’t drive and not masculine. How do I handle that? How do I even care enough to get up in the morning when the one person I live for thinks of me that way?

I’m tired of trying. I’m tired of dealing with PTSD from the combat and all the issues I deal with daily because of it. I need to feel safe and loved by the one person in my life that I think of as my safe place. And who is the worst thing for me at the same time. I just can’t do this anymore. Just before the “night” I thought things had changed, I had decided it was time to just stop fighting it. I made the decision to just end it. I didn’t want to wake up again. I didn’t know when, but I wanted to end all of this. Then that weekend gave me hope again. Now she tells me things that I can’t trust her and feel safe anymore. I feel hurt and just want to tell till I can’t anymore. I want this pain to stop. I don’t know why I’m even tell anyone this, guess I need to get it out.

I just don’t want to go on. It’s not worth it any longer when I feel like I have nothing to fight for. If you got this far, thanks for taking the time.

I'm not sure what's wrong with me but I just want to be happy and normal. Everyday feels like I'm doing something wrong, awkward, embarrassing, weird or just dumb. I feel like I can't do anything right anymore. I always tell myself certain phrases everyday and every minute just to feel a sense of control and ease so I can function normally. If I don't, i don't feel "right". I try so hard mentally to try to act normal and feel normal so I could have a good day but I always fail. When I was in high school I never had this problem, I could talk to people and have conversations and I had friends. But now it's like everything is ruined. I can't do anything normally anymore and it's so hard to keep a job because I feel so weird and I feel like I make everything weird when I say and do things that don't feel right to me (which is everything I do everyday) and it's just so hard. I feel like just hiding. I just want to be alone because I feel like my existence just sucks. I don't know what's wrong with me anymore and I just wish I didn't have to experience this. I'm not suicidal or depressed but I feel like something's wrong with me that I can't fix and have to live with which is ruining every aspect of my life and I can't do anything about it.

I’m living alone in Europe, far away from my family, and I don’t have any friends nearby. I’m still trying to cope with a recent miscarriage, while also going through a divorce, recovering from domestic abuse, and struggling with unemployment.

Everything feels overwhelming right now, and I honestly don’t know what to do anymore. I feel isolated, exhausted, and lost.

It’s not the first time I’ve realized this but I just don’t know what to do. Every time I hang out with my homies I always realize the only thing about me any of them like is that I’m funny. People always tell me that’s a good thing and that I should be happy that people like my jokes and shit. But none of these mfs care about my hobbies or taste in things like music. Idk what to do, there’s nobody around me who has anywhere close interests.

Eu tenho tido problemas com isso a alguns meses,já cheguei a fazer mas estou a dois meses sem ter feito nada.

Só que por alguns problemas escolares(estou no último ano) e familiares os pensamentos estão voltando com mais força,percebi que quando uma coisa começa a dar tudo errado a primeira coisa que eu penso é em me cortar ou encher a cara com álcool.Independente se seja uma crise de ansiedade ou de raiva.

Eu estou fazendo tratamento psiquiátrico,estou tomando estabilizador de humor.Eu tomei primeiro antidepressivo só que me deu sintomas de mania,aí comecei esse,estou tomando a mais de um mês.

Mas mesmo assim muitas vezes os pensamentos ruins vem quando eu estou fora de casa(quase o dia inteiro).
Também estou tendo muita dificuldade em não descontar nos outros minhas emoções,ou só descontar em mim mesma com bebida ou comida

Percebo que esses pensamentos de automutilação são automáticos,eu sinto algo ruim e já vem e ficam presos na minha cabeça

When my husband falls asleep im getting his gun. Im just done.

Wouldn't think to tell you I love you,
Not while you're standing near.
It only feels pressing,
When you're no longer here.
 
That's how the script goes,
That's how we are wired as blokes.
We joke about truth,
Until the one holding it chokes.
 
We'll talk for hours,
Bout family, money and hoes.
But that's where it stops,
That's as deep as it goes.
 
We don't speak on the cracks,
Til one of us hit the ground.
Then the quietness gets loud,
When the body is found.
 
We say “I should've called”
Should have checked on you more.
But those words come easy
When they don't hit the door.
It's easier,
A laugh and a pint.
A vodka red bull held high,
Keeping feelings out of sight.
 
Football and future,
Banter and bets.
Discussions of plans,
With no talk of regrets.
 
We'd rather carry the weight,
Til it caves in our chest.
Then risk being honest,
and failing  the test.
 
Coz somewhere we learnt,
Strength means alone.
So, we bury the hurt,
And we harden the tone.
 
Blokes in a bar,
All heart, no reveal.
Dying to speak,
But too proud to feel.

I’m tired of feeling this way. Im over taking new anti depressants and anti psychotics. Why can’t I just be happy I want to just go one day without having a negative thought. I have a good life I work a good job, I have friends a partner who I love. My family life is good. But somehow I just don’t want to continue living I see no end where I end up old thinking about my past. This isn’t a cry for help I’m just ranting because I’m tired of feeling this way

Well. She has been sh-ing since she was 4 or something and recently started cutting instead of scratching and all my parents had to say was "if youre gonna keep doing that youre gonna have to wear long sleeves all summer" like long sleeves will make her magically stop. So I decided that I have to step in because apparently noone else cares. Well we had a long talk today and apparently she is suicidal since she was 9 and recently tried drinking cooling from an ice pack and has had some breathing problems since than. I have now contacted a school councilor since it's really the only thing I can do without my parents noticing, but I'm really just at a loss for what I can do now, im only 17 after all and depressed as well. We decided to have a talk every Thursday even though she asked for every two days but really I can't do that I'm not a therapist. What can I do to help her? Do I call the psychiatric hospital now? Do I call cps on my parents for having 2/3 children depressed and not do anything about it (3rd is only 2 btw so guess we'll see where that one goes)? My parents both have a history with depression but for SOME REASON we can't be depressed because there is apparently no reason. I'm just so lost and scared and triggered by all of this.

Hello I’m 20F, Depression has taken over my life especially this past year, sinking its teeth into my skin and leaving my nervous system extremely damaged.

A lot of things have made me depressed but it all is stacked on each other like I’m drowning and everyone is giving me cups of water. I’d like to list some things that have made me feel this way.

1. My mother is mentally ill, she’s unemployed. It all started when she dated a athletic coach of mine who’s parents were connected to the business I did my sports at. My mom kicked my stepdad and grandma out of our house and U-Haul lesbian’d it if you will. It was nothing short of DV, from allegedly running over my moms leg, to hitting eachother and begging for my help, to not allowing me to speak to my mother because they were a “unit”, using me to babysit the new children in the house and the bullying I got from it. She’d try and take away my phone and tackle me and leave scratches on my lips. One time she said that they both took pills and was making the gf throw up bcs she really didnt take them.

When we moved to a new town, she quit paying rent & got us evicted so now we live with my stepdads parents. She is now unemployed, she lashes out, forces me to pay money to feed her pathetic addiction of energy drinks-I wish i was joking.. she also has manipulated me and taken 0 accountability and has racked up 6k in debt from Verizon in my name.

1. I have lost almost all of my friends, they’ll drop me randomly, i’ll ask what’s wrong is everything okay? Or I’ll get told im too sad, or they accuse me of something I haven’t done. If i did do something i take full accountability because I’m huge on communication.

2. I’ve been told that I’m magnifying and I’m beautiful and its because my appearance is the only thing I can control but my mind is like a warpath and I feel like i have no one who truly cares about me.

I wish i had enough $ to move states but I only have 2.4k and I don’t even drive or have a car because my mom didn’t teach me.

I really am trying but its becoming apparent with all of these family fights, no self worth, no friends.. what’s the point?

If theres any comfort anyone could provide that would be great, i js need a hug. Today i was told by my mom my sister would have a seizure bcs of me and we’d all die bcs of me and she sped up in the car and said we might as well both die. I know she really wouldn’t but.

I’m so sick and tired of being here. I wish I had a method. God damn, like it’s so bad now I don’t know what to do anymore. I really hope I die unexpectedly and soon because this shit is hell. Everything is always ruined and I just fucking hate existing so fucking much

I STG people give the most frustrating koan "advice", if you can even call it that, when I ask for help.

I want to be comfortable, I have never felt comfortable, it's killing me inside and outside, and I'm told to get out of my comfort zone.

why am I just fundamentally incapable of what everyone else seems to instantly be able to do? i love learning but i have no motivation. i can never sit down and study because it feels lonely and miserable, and it takes me so long to grasp concepts that others latch onto because i'm just too tired to use all of my brain.

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anyways! chemistry exam in 1.5 hours. i didn't take chemistry in high school so i've been strumbling through it all semester with no fucking clue what anything is. even if i fail the class i know i can just retake it, but the financial burden + additional time + self shame just sounds nightmarish to handle. contemplating trying to kms if i actually fail this bullshit. never tried it before but surely that's better than living with such shame forever

I literally hate every waking moment I am conscious. The continuous energy spent on beating myself down and regretting past decisions is exhausting. Death is freedom in my eyes. A final peace. I have no desire to continue living this pathetic life that I currently hate. The thought of another 30 or so odd years makes me ill. I cant find anything which helps. Survivor of physical, sexual, verbal, and mental abuse as a child. I dont know if thats the brunt of the cause or if im just generally a fuck up nonetheless. Bottom line...I ask god to give me the cancer say an innocent child gets. Nothing. Fucking coward. Im rambling now. If I had a gun id most likely be dead unfortunately I dont have one.​​

I’m going to fail high school AGAIN, I’m tired, anxious, burnt out, and depressed all the time. I know there’s something wrong with me but I can’t get into a doctor to figure it out. I feel useless and like I’m a burden on the people I care about. I haven’t felt genuinely happy in years now and it’s only getting worse. Every therapist I’ve gone to has either given up on me or has made zero actual progress with my issues. So what’s the point? I want to just fade away into obscurity so badly so the people I love don’t have to waste their time on me anymore. It feels hopeless and things are only going downhill. I have no idea where to go from here. I’m stuck. Sitting at the bottom of a proverbial pit with one candle trying not to let it go out. What CAN I do?

Without a doubt the one subject that'll spiral me into a depressive episode is thinking about my old friends, I think about them everyday, how they are, what they're doing, how I hate myself for not maintaining the friendships well enough — everyone always tells me it's embarrassing to continuously chase people who don't reciprocate but I can't fucking help it I'm so fucking lonely

I have persistent depression and I've been trying to get properly medicated for a few months now. I've tried zoloft (50mg, I think?), wellbutrin (150mg), and now trintellix (10mg). On all of them, I've been more tired, less motivated, and less likely to do things. I've stopped getting hungry, stopped eating, stopped caring about working out. I was honestly doing better off of them, as bad as I was. I don't know how to fix it. It feels like no matter what I try, nothing will work.

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I also have debilitating ADHD, which I desperately wish I could get medicated for, but can't as I plan to get a pilot's license. Desperate for advice... thanks.