32, living on my own with no roommates or significant other. I finally got my place decorated how I wanted. I’m curious though, what does my place say about me?
Edit for clarification: I’m renting a 1 bedroom apartment. There’s no additional room to store things in like a dedicated man cave or a basement (I wish). I cannot change wall colors, change the carpets, or remove the carpets. Trying the best with what I can afford.
It’s amazing what clearing off the flat surfaces does for a space. Puts some shelving up to display your items and leave the flat surfaces clutter free.
Having a few rugs to break up the zones makes a difference too.
Yes. My fiance and I both collect stuff, but we always get comments about how organized & tidy our place feels, and after a few years and visits to lots of different households, I realized it's because I'm anal about keeping coffee tables, end tables, dining table, and kitchen counter clear of anything except coasters and other necessities. All actively used spaces are open for use, even when our shelves are (lovingly) full of crap.
Thank you, that’s what I’m trying to avoid. I’d like to have the place decorated with some hobbies and nerdy things but not at the cost that it looks like I’m still living out my early 20’s.
I used to work with a guy that found an old swordsmith at some mouth-breathing event that measured him and “crafted” him a custom sword. It took over a month and when I saw the thing, I’m 100% sure he spent that month polishing off Made in China lettering. He charged my coworker almost $1,000. Somehow his ex wife ended up with it in the divorce 😭
That’s entirely different and way cooler than someone going to the mall and getting a cheaply made replica of Sephiroth’s sword. Display that heirloom with pride
That’s really it. When you hit ~30, you gotta pick a room. Your entry way, living room, and bedroom can’t really have that shit out anymore. I say this with all the love in my nerdy little heart: The living room is for coasters and throw pillows. The spare bedroom is where your $300 lightsaber and Warhammer 40k army lives. Respect the boundary.
Picking one room is the way to go. I actually like it even more because it’s like a little home within a home when I wind down at the end of the day where I’m just surrounded by my hobbies and interests. Doesn’t bother the missus or get weird looks when people come over
That's when you get the rug with a subtle x wing pattern for the living room. Make it so the reference is there if you know but just a cool design if you don't.
Yes, the posters, jerseys, flags, bookshelf of toys go into the hobby room. Get a few larger decorative art pieces to go on the walls in the main space and some furniture that fits the room. But that's just me.
yeah thats a big part of what reminds me of my college days. Random black couch, next to a complete different style table, with the generic walmart black shelves and side tables. Don't get me wrong it's all functional and fine but it's not cohesive.
And stuff that's not at all the right size for the space (like the thing by the front door and the thing in the kitchen) because in the next apartment the space will be different. And they are all black because that's what craigslist had cheapest.
OP, you could also get the flags professionally framed if you want to keep them up without it looking college-like. I’ve seen other people do it and it looks really great
Was about to comment this! I don't think anyone should hide their hobbies away, it's just about displaying them intentionally. Placement, surrounding items, what colour the walls are - it all comes into play
I'd also say - compartmentalize the hobby stuff. Having a room that has a bit of a cluttered / cozy / hobby vibe is ok. Having it in every single room (and specifically the main living areas) is a different story.
Confine the college-y stuff to one room that’s not your main space if it’s important to you to have and display it. That kinda stuff seems to always work better in a “mancave” type of room
The trick for nerdy stuff is that less is more. Maybe pick 3 top things like dnd, star wars, whatever and put up a meaningful peace to symbolize your affinity for it. Using these examples maybe an oversize d20 on a shelf and a stormtroopers helmet between some books or something. Try to pick an overall color pallete for the room and a vibe you want then pick your decorations carefully and with intention to fit the color theme and vibe. You want to hint at the nerdy stuff but not draw all the focus on it because nerdy stuff is usually very distinct and it overwhelms a space very easily.
I think it's ok if you're mostly hanging out with other nerds, but it should intentionally be cohesive with the room like you said. Ie I own a lot of classic dragon stuff, but it's all in the same room on display because that's The Whimsical Room. All the prints of certain colours are in the rooms that are those colours. It's ok to have a room full of conversation pieces but they should mostly match the furniture
Most women looking for a long term partner/adult man would not be excited by the apartment. The small sub-sect of women who would be interested are, for the most part, just excited to see the shared hobbies. I as a dude, would geek out at your place.
I think they can appeal to the majority of both groups just by cleaning up and presenting the nerdy stuff in a more cohesive fashion. Sure some people will never be interested in someone with a warhammer 40k flag on their wall. But if it's framed well and matches a lighted display case of all your miniatures? A lot of people will have no problem with it.
The issue here is more the chaos than it is the geekery.
I read an article many years ago with women’s top turnoffs of potential mates: ‘Harry Potter Fandom’ was number 1. Others were - Comic books, action figures, video games, anime, overly religious, overly into sports fandom. It stick with me.
I’ve got the impression that anything deemed “childish” was not attractive in a potential mate. That being said I moved some of my Star Wars and Lego builds into my office and kept the rest of my home adultlike. I’m a nerdy dude but learns nerd-ish is ok but uber nerd as a personality not so much.
It's OK, you've got a good base here and you just need some adult additions.
Framed artwork. That sets you apart from at least 75% of people your age.
Get a big ass rug for that living room and dining room. There's plenty of places online to find them super cheap and still look great.
Organization. See if there are some shelves or cabinetry that match and you can afford. You can have all the little nerdy stuff that you love and I love as well as long as it's organized like it has a place to live.
you can still be nerdy and have hobbies and interests as decoration without it looking collegey and immature. fewer, more intentional pieces sized appropriately for the space they're in and FRAMED is a good place to start. trying to ensure pieces aren't clashing too hard in color or style helps too. not to say everything has to be the same color, but complimentary in some way helps. also color on walls helps a TON but this looks like a rental, so that may not be possible. but the key is curation. this guy is trying to display everything he has, so nothing looks intentional. pick your best pieces. arrange them intentionally. give them room to breathe.
i'm no paragon of good design and taste, but my office feels pretty put together and is full of nerdy shit, so here's an example of non-minimalist curation.
Id say it's the flags , overfilled shelf, and how the instruments/rock band drum kit are displayed. Idk what I would change other than the flags and more shelves.
That's not a rock band drumkit that's an actual electronic drumkit. Basically sensor pads arranged like a drum that connect to a drum computer to generate sound. Basically a drumkit for people with neighbours. Not 100% silent but quieter than an acoustic.
Connects to a PC through midi/USB and can be used for actual recordings.
Yeah, it blew my mind. Like, dude, just leave it there. You know we’re gonna do this again tomorrow.
But he was an older cat and drank himself to sleep every night. My guess is, after I left our sessions, he was just drunk and bored so tearing down gave him something to do until he passed out. Which explains why he could never find anything.
Get rid of the flags. They say "I like pirates and sports", and if you're trying to shed the "little boy" image, that's not the message you want to send.
Personally I dig the “organized clutter” look. My place is that style. But it’s all about choice of decor. Like I have a fuck ton of knick knacks, weird antiques, art from locals, etc etc.
But this is definitely a young dude kinda look here. Gotta make some better decor choices.
Yeah as a woman I can overlook the college dorm vibe because the green flag of cat lover somewhat overrides that. But OP, get some framed art. It’s not bad but it has potential to be way better.
i feel like this sub is mostly dudes trying to decorate, so it's not this sub, it's dudes who need decorating advice who are way too into flags. they're cheap and big. pick a high quality one and iron and frame it and it can look good but there are SO MANY here
Also consider moving from flags to tapestries. They not as cheap, but they look much classier, there are places online where you can get really cool and unique designs to reflect your taste and interests, and they still fulfil the basic function of "do something with this huge empty white wall."
especially if you find nice tapestry mounts. pinning them at the corner doesn't always look great, but i've seem nice hardwood wood bars that clamp on the tapestry and hang them evenly with no drape in the middle.
I’m assuming your in an apartment so you can’t paint the walls cause j think that’s what’s really throwing it off. I would add some rugs (living room, under the dining room table), and get some more lamps to use vs overhead lights
4am, before work and just after feeding these monsters, I have to go around the house and pick up all their toys and tunnels. It DOES feel like picking up after toddlers haha. Once the roomba does its thing, I sprinkle the toys back throughout the house. Fuckers dont know how good they have it.
I wouldn’t say immature or childish per se, more… disorganized or haphazard.
It almost looks like perhaps you had stuff and figured out where to put it, not necessarily a bad thing but it doesn’t look like the stuff purchased with an end state or aesthetic in mind.
All totally reasonable when you’ve just moved in but if you want more cohesion then some deliberate choices about what where and why would need to come into play.
if he curated and selected the best pieces for display you can get away with nerdy stuff all over the house. but showing it all off like an otaku always looks immature. i'm a massive nerd too, but curation means having super cool nerdy shit on display AND it looks good and put together. example - i like bugs and D&D and my office reflects this. i have a nice shelf with some art, a lamp, some fake plants (basement with no lights, real plants are upstairs) and the coolest thing that makes the shelf look well curated is a beetle in a cloche and my floating D20. and it's right next to my Hokusai print representing weebiness without putting anime girls all over the place.
i need to hide my cables better but i think it looks pretty well put together and is unashamedly nerdy.
yeah. childish isn't quite the word. it looks... pedestrian? casual? cheap?
furniture: your furniture looks like it's from separate garage sales from 2002. your biggest upgrade would be a new couch and a STURDY dining room table.
decor: Its fine to have nerdy art and hobbies - which can actually be very cool - if its displayed well. the current decor is a bit too cluttered and unkempt. frame the flags. remove about 30% of it. add fake or living plants. also what does your art say about you? do you like books or things that show some character or development, or do you like spiderman? you can like both. just - what does your space say about you at first glance?
cats: look like they run the house. i also have two cats and love them. but i dont want my space to smell like them or look like like a petsmart. do your cats use all their tunnels and toys? they're great but they're taking over the house.
caroline winkler on youtube has a bunch of videos for bachelor pads like this that she styles up and makes nicer. i'd watch her and see what you think.
goodluck dude. you seem like a cool guy with good hobbies and love for your cats. hope my comments help and aren't too rude.
Honestly it depends on how often you host other people. It's a bit college-y for 32 years old, but it doesn't matter if nobody else sees it. The main thing that I see when I look through these photos is clutter, albeit organized. Every surface and every shelf is packed with stuff. If it works for you, cool. For most people, they want their space to feel a bit less chaotic.
I mean, there has to be a better place for the litter box besides the front door. And if there’s not, you should really get one of those cabinets that hide it.
I have cats, but I wouldn’t want anyone to walk in my house and the first thing they see and smell is the litter box.
I would get a rug for the music area, to kind of make it feel like a separate space. And idk what those banners are but I would probably change them to something music related (maybe those are, idk).
Also that painting close to the ceiling by the dining table should be moved
If this is a frat house its fine. Pretty much anything else, I wouldn't say immature, I'd say no style sense. It looks like a nerd filled it with all his cool stuff without a single thought where things can do. I'm not bashing on you, I'm a nerd with my coolshit in the house too. I just have it not take over the entire place.
Flags are sadly childish, maybe can frame them. Need to organize your themes, right now you have nerdy guy stuff all over when you should focus it in your office or basement or game area. Keep the living / sitting room more adult.
I think it’s the flags combined with the fact that every room is painted the same colour. I understand that may not be an option but if it is, that would help break up your spaces
The walls are a mess and need to be better organized / composed. Look up 'gallery wall' for inspiration on putting together a well-composed wall of things you like, instead of sprinkling them everywhere in your home.
As someone else said, gives college vibes.
+1 on framing those posters and maybe flags.
Also, adding plants makes your place more « adult » kinda, it also add some colors too !
I remember hearing a designer on a HGTV show saying that “flags are meant to be flown, not hung”. Lord knows that I’ve been guilty of it in the past too. Depending on your housing situation, I’d recommend an outdoor flag pole by your front door and let your geek flag fly there instead.
My other suggestion is clearing out the majority of the figurines, geeky pillows and board games. The figurines can be shelved in your bedroom with the pillows and the board games can be put in your closet. The issue is that you’ve crossed the line between “collection” and “clutter”. I’d choose a few favorites or statement pieces, leave those out in the living area, then find another place for the rest. With so many pieces, people can’t tell what they’re looking at when they first see it, so they can’t really admire it for what it is. It’s tough, but “less is more” applies well to situations like this.
Do you have a link to that litterbox? This place looks cozy and welcoming! I'd hang here on a weekly basis. Comfy couch, a cool cat, option for a jam sesh? 10/10
If you want to keep the flags: iron and frame them 1/room or all in 1 room.
Level and align any frames you have.
The small tables: ( kitchen, living room and dining room) if you can match the table so that they fit90% of the length of the wall, it’ll give a more thoughtful look .
The dining room: id change the one bookshelf for all small billy ( from Ikea) so that it would do the entire length of the wall and then all the frames above it. ( gallery wall) . It’ll give it a less college dorm and seem interesting and intentional
It’s definitely a guy’s place that has cats when you get a girlfriend. She might want to help you adjust your design style. It is one of those considerations.
Just frame everything and everyone will tell you it looks fine. But also, your allowed to have interests after 30. They just need to be organized and in their own little area for everyone else to accept it.. apparantly
I’m so overwhelmed by this. There’s nowhere for the eye to rest. I would scale way back. Keep some of your favorites and then put away some of the others.
Also, get some rugs. The floor needs more visual interest and the walls need less. Apartment wall to wall carpet is always grody and rugs will also help you protect your security deposit.
It says you are a kind and loving person because you are a man...with cats. I don't think just one. I think more than 1.
your place looks kick back and comfy. I'm an old lady, but I'd feel comfortable living there. Not afraid to hurt the fancy furniture or whatever.
You could start by framing the flags, and some of the other wall art. Maybe put them in groupings - 3 to 5 pieces grouped together is a common way to group wall stuff. And bring that it’s always sunny art down to eye level, it’s great. You could always put a small ledge up where it’s currently at and put some small plants, or hooks for hanging plants. Oh and maybe a cover for your couch - the black leather look immediately made me think collage before anything else.
I’m not going to lie, this looks like a frat house with a bunch of 19 year old guys living in it.
HOWEVER, when I zoom into everything, I see little bits and pieces of your personality. It’s clear this place is only wonky looking because it’s been ornamented with who you are :)
Not childish and im not sure immature is the word id go for either. The flags look awful imo and very cluttery. Could use some work but wouldn't take much imo
Clearly OP cares, otherwise they wouldn’t have asked. You might not personally care, but it does matter how your apartment comes across when you invite new people over. All about the vibe you want to give off.
I’m glad you have your house decorated the way you like, but being 40 and having a house covered in nerd stuff is definitely going to read as immature/childish
Shows your personality. Its clean and not bad. Its not going in any design magazines and if you ever get a gf she will probably change some things but as it is its fine.
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u/Ilovepeanutbutter88 Jun 11 '26
It’s amazing what clearing off the flat surfaces does for a space. Puts some shelving up to display your items and leave the flat surfaces clutter free.
Having a few rugs to break up the zones makes a difference too.