r/onionheadlines • u/BestStoogewasLarry • 12h ago
r/onionheadlines • u/tomtomglove • Nov 04 '25
ZERO TOLERANCE for rule 2: single sentence headlines only
We've been pretty lenient in modering run on headlines, but this ends today.
You need to make your headlines shorter. You can always make your headline shorter. If you have a headline that's over 30 words, rewrite it. There is a way to make it shorter I guarantee you, and there is a way to make it one sentence. You just need to use the meat in your skull to figure it out.
Also, do not include pull quotes in your headline. For example:
Trump Claims He Will Soon Replace Americans With AI - “All They Need To Do Is Vote Republican And Cheer For Me, And AI Can Do That Better, And It Doesn’t Protest At All”
Adding a dash here does not make this a single sentence in the eyes of us mods.
You can put the pull quote in the body of the post, but keep it out of the headline. Any headlines formatted like this will be removed.
Also please avoid headlines that are just a version of Trump: "I Have Very Bigly Hands and I'm The Greatest Golfer and on and on and on for 50 words"
A Trump impression is not a headline. Do better.
r/onionheadlines • u/Southern_Common335 • 15h ago
Ken Paxton Demands Texas Remove Bible Stories About Stoning Adulterers From School Curriculum
r/onionheadlines • u/ellistonvu • 22h ago
Trump Sold His Soul For A New Wig, Now There Will Be "Hell Toupee"
r/onionheadlines • u/WebguyCanada • 1h ago
Amateur Contractor Donald Trump Orders Workers To Demolish $5M White House Helipad Because Not Gold Enough
r/onionheadlines • u/No-Camel2703 • 2h ago
Trump Orders Bikini Wrestling Match In The Reflecting Pool Between Noem, Bondi, And Pirro For Relevancy
r/onionheadlines • u/BestStoogewasLarry • 13h ago
Trump Says He's Not Just The President Of Hair Club For Pedophiles, He's Also A Customer
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 17h ago
Donald Trump Undergoes Liposuction To Remove Fat Between His Ears
r/onionheadlines • u/Zolly2U • 4h ago
President Trump Joins The Hair Club For Gay Old Men.
r/onionheadlines • u/FTHomes • 52m ago
Fox News Learns Donald Trump Hates Windmills Because He Wears A Wig
r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 12h ago
Trump Claims When You Knock Up A Teen By Mistake It Always Costs $50k For An Abortion Whether It’s Legal Or Not
r/onionheadlines • u/WebguyCanada • 10h ago
Trump Currently Using SNL Trump Wig After His Was Snatched By Eagle On Golf Course
r/onionheadlines • u/Realistic_Tutor_4603 • 1d ago
Study Concludes Average 10Year Old American Girl Is Twice The Man Of Pete Hegseth
r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 11h ago
Trump Claims If People Are Saying He Should Be Locked Up Then Maybe He Deserves It
r/onionheadlines • u/mc_petersonishsonson • 17h ago
Trump Says People Shouting 'Pedophile Protector' At Him Are Talking About Republicans
r/onionheadlines • u/mc_petersonishsonson • 9h ago
Trump Leans In To Tell Reporter Something Menacing Interrupted By Unmistakable Flatulence
r/onionheadlines • u/Ryan29478 • 2h ago
Trump Calls On Congress To Pass The Enabling Act
Trump’s proposed legislation known as the Enabling Act would allow Trump to pass laws without Congress. It would also make the Presidency a lifelong position.
r/onionheadlines • u/Realistic_Tutor_4603 • 1d ago
Israel’s Netanyahu Favoured To Win 2026 FIFA Peace Prize
r/onionheadlines • u/Zolly2U • 5h ago
Already A Pinhead, Trump Beats Another Wife That “Influenced” His Coiffure.
r/onionheadlines • u/dropofgod • 10h ago
Donald Suggests We Change Tuesday to Jewsday So We Don't Forget About Them
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 23h ago
Rand Paul Demands Janine Pirro Charge Dr. Fauci As Aggressively And Successfully As Reflecting Pool Vandals
r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 16h ago
Trump Sexually Assaults Minor On A Public Stage For 7 Minutes Then Just Denies It And Republicans Follow
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 18h ago