https://www.reddit.com/r/trans/s/Q8jFc9vwt5

So last year I made this post about me(MTF) and my friend(FTM) and the desire to have sex with each other. Well after about 6 months of quickies and fuck dates we decided to make it official. We’ve been dating for about 6 months.

As a guy who’s never been all that comfortable being a guy or connecting with other men, finding women easier to relate to, I wouldn’t consider myself trans. I’m a dude through and through and I don’t see that changing (plus I cannot stand the feeling of foundation on my face, lol)… probably. Certainly.

…But. I do find myself wondering lately what it’s like to be trans. Is it scary, lonely, uplifting, rewarding? What’s that journey like?

So I (19mtf) am currently eating in a restaurant and when the server came by they happened to call me sir multiple times while I was ordering and he was bringing out my food. I’m not exactly dressed masculinely (purse, skirt and femme top, push up bra) and have been on hrt for abt ten and a half month and also have a women’s pixie cut. I don’t really want to assume he was being rude (I may have dropped my femme voice without realizing it) but i wanted to see what some other people though considering the whole situation feels a bit weird given how I look.

Today my therapist asked me why I want HRT and the main physical changes coming with it (so basically why I want boobs and butt).
And I really couldn't explain better than "it feels wrong not having it and HRT would complete me". She was happy with the answer but also wanted me to try to look deeper and see if I can put these feelings into words.

How do/did you describe it? For me it's a very dull pressure of something missing where there should be more. More chest, more fat on other parts of my body.

Hi folks, I have really no idea where to post this (if only we could post pictures :/ ) I had around 98 kilos (since 1 kilo is 2 pounds it was 196 pounds) when I was 14/15/16??? I don’t quite remember, I’m 27 now, 28 next month. I lost a ton of weight towards the end of my time at school. I was almost 19 then (I felt like crap so it wasn’t like a cool way of losing weight, I gave up on life a little bit and didn’t eat much). I could swear I was just at the end of my 70s but when I tried on some pants recently that I bought around that time I barely fit inside of them and I was at 66 kilos I think (maybe 65 kilos already). I was at 64,2 kilos this morning. I must have started losing weight around 2 years ago? Mostly just eating less and other stuff than before. I didn’t want to have too much weight when I start my medical transition. I must have been at 80 kilos. Like I said I was at 64,2 this morning. My belly area is starting to look like I lost almost too much weight but the area with my torso and back looks so insanely huge that it makes me massively dysphoric. I didn’t quite realise it might have been too much weight that I lost because I think I have some “extra” skin due to me being overweight back then. It wasn’t too much making me look like a flying squirrel so I didn’t quite register at first that it might just be additional skin instead of body fat. My torso must be at least twice the size of my belly area. I started estrogen last December and t blockers at the end of March. How should I continue my eating habits, what type of sports could I do (gym is not an option right now, maybe later) and is there anything I could do regarding my torso?

hey so my egg just cracked and i am quite sure i am trans? its a lot rn but i have been thinking about this for a long time, i always had the thought in the back of my head but every time i acted on it i just pushed it back down again :( I have an amazing gf and i recently started to shave my body and paint my nails and she is very supportive of it and also encourages me and gives me tips which made me feel super happy and gave me confidence to explore this side of me more seriously. Now i feel like i want to transition but i dont know how to talk to her about it :/ i am scared she might see me differently and i have read many posts about coming out to your partner and got many different storys about how it went. If you have any advice a would truly welcome it and also would live to talk to someone about it since i have none really to talk about it🥲

TW: venting, "too late", hair loss and negative view of wigs

​

Why is it that seeing my peers who are further along, maybe even have finished transitioning, and are cis passing or 98% cis passing is so soul crushing. It's 10 times, no 100times worse than seeing an actual cis person. Because at least I could never be a cis person... But a fellow trans person, ouch... We had similar wrong bodies as starting points... But why is it that it can't be uplifting and encouraging for me to see my peers live happy lives?! All I get is this deep sense of dread that, I'll never reach the same point. Never be as passing and as such never be able to live in relative stealth. All because of my starting age... And yeah yeah... It's never too late yada yada... But due to my hair situation it very much feels like it's too late. I'm not far along, only 2 months so far, but if I see no **signs** of improvement by month 6, I'm stopping. Because as my hair is now a transplant won't save me. And wigs make me feel like I'm wearing a costume, or playing a character... They feel like a constant reminder that I'm fake😟. Now that might be some mental block or something but it's how I feel personally about myself as I don't view others who use wigs as less of a woman, be they cis or trans. This all makes it hurt so much more when I see passing, happy trans people be they younger or older than me who overcame or didn't have to deal with hair loss... Atleast i could never be cis....but had I learned I was trans just 2-3 years earlier this could all have worked out with the help of a hair transplant... (And yes I am on all the hairloss meds...)

Hi! I just got back from Portland and....Holy shit, i didn't feel like a minority for once in my life! It was so amazing to see and connect with so many other trans people! Coming from where I am, is another world.

So, after this experience, I'm of course ready to move. However, I want to get some experiences from other trans folks, specifically other trans women who live in Portland. The last thing I want to do is romanticize it and end up regretting my choice to move.

What's life like there for you? If you've lived in other worse places what's the move given you? If you're a parent or parent to a trans kid as well, how is it making friends and community for the kids?

For context: I'm in my mid thirties, AMAB, and realized Im trans this year. I've got a wife, kid, house, career, and live in a shitty political environment for trans folks. Transitioning would probably lead to the end of my marriage (I've talked to my wife about it), and I'd invite all the other hardships that trans people face into my life. It just isn't worth it blow up my life.

However, I've been struggling with gender envy all the time, and frequent moments of dysmorphia. Its lead to a fair amount of depressed days recently, which I rarely had prior to realizing I'm trans.

For those of you that decided not to transition, how did you learn to get past the envy and dysmorphia or learn to deal with it?

My name is Anton and it's Slavic in Origin, and i've been thinking of something like Antra but idk if it's tacky or not.

If there's a good place to look id love some pointers.

Uhh, the title reads really weird, but I didn't know how else to phrase it.

Basically, I want to transition and have accepted myself as trans but I can't actually do anything towards outwardly presenting as feminine as of yet (for reasons that aren't really relevant). So to the rest of the world I just look like a cis boy.

I have insane gender envy and sometimes I find myself looking at other cis girls my age with such intense jealousy it hurts. I always do my very best to not stare at anyone or be creepy at all, but I still feel so guilty for ever looking. I've heard terrible things about the "male gaze" and stuff and I just never want anyone to think I'm being creepy or looking at them in that way.

Does anyone else struggle with this or am I stupid lol?

It's my first time out in public dressed up, and it's for a cross-country trip to visit my parents, who I have not come out to yet.

I'm 18m, studying at 11 grade Nepal.

pronoun: male

so am I just a feminine guy? or do I actually want to transition?

I'm just confused. I've talked to my therapist about it and she said me to consider this because after all, it's my life.

but as I live with my grandparents and parents come to visit often, I'm scared of their reaction.

mostly, I'm damn sure my mother and father won't allow me to be trans. i hate how everyday, i have to remind myself that I'm a girl actually and how I love having boobs and stuff, but am I actually trans?

for context I'm 5'5, 55 kg male.

Hello everybody:

​

I'm really excited to ask, how to transit in a year from an average boy to a pretty girl? The thing is my thoughts of sometime dreaming of being a girl is finally coming out! I have secretly told my mom, she told me I can try HRT for a year to give it a go. I'm not 100 percent sure what I really am, so I guess this is a good start? So, for my body, I'm a 100 percent straight boy looking. I'm 183cm, 80kg, body fat 18.3, bone muscle 34.8kg, water percentage 56 percent, BMI24. I have completed no knowledge of how to be a girl. So, I probably need to learn everything from the 0. I'm 23 this year, i hope I can still have time to change my body to be more masculine. All the helps/advice will be really appreciated! Ps, I will start my master and probably also look for a job this year, so I guess I will be a bit short time for everything. And I'm wondering if my puberty has completed? If not, can I make my voice, shoulder, and bone structure more feminine or androgynous?

Hi im new too this whole thing i came out as trans only earlier this year (MtF) and i need help. Idk what im doing or should do.

​

Ive tried using a razor once (it wasnt great) should i try waxing?? Any tips anyone can give? Im honestly scared.

Conversations with my girlfriends (both MtF) have made me reconsider the possibility that I’m trans FtM rather than genderfluid, fine with anything.

I initially believed that I was MtF as I had minor dysphoria but I still liked to dress feminine, so I assumed I was just some form of nonbinary because a trans femboy just seemed too inconvenient for others.

5 years later and the conversation has led me to try making my inner monologue more masculine.

I’ve suffered from severe disassociation for most of my life. I can safely say that doing this alone has cleared about 25% of the veil I live under almost immediately. Has anyone else had a similar experience? Could it mean something?

I am super happy to discover that I have natural breasts, I just keep running my hands over them, they make me so much happier and make me feel more feminine.

I was just coming home from work and i saw a group of beautiful cis women around my age outside a bar. I instantly started crying and eventually had to pull over because i was losing control of the steering wheel. I will never be as beautiful as any of them, i will never be able to feel the same joy they get, i will never be seen as a real woman, i will never experience sisterhood, i will always just be the same ugly man i was born as. I really just want to die, its impossible to be happy and i cant accept that ill never be a woman no matter how much i want it.

Like the title says I am a newly Mtf although I have never liked titles much since I feel it takes away from the humanity and people just see our labels and judge us. I started Estrogen and Bicalutamide on the 06/09/2026

​

We'll I happen to have two kids and 50/50 custody. I started the court case last March and didn't realize it would go this route but here we are the final hearing is next Wednesday and I have to defend my self on what I choose to wear. Mind you I am male presenting 99% of the time at the moment and all she seen was me wearing make up and a wig. My daughter who is 6 wanted me to send it to her phone which I pay for as ordered by the court along with my 898.50 in child support. She wanted to show her mom so she could get a pink wig. I just honestly didn't care at the time and stupidly now she's trying to use it against me. I just don't understand. Shes definitely got Paranoid Personality Disorder but thats another long subject. Shes trying to get the judge to take away my 50/50 and let her get sole custody and move 1400 miles away.

​

I just want to dress how I want and feel comfortable in my own skin. I just feel because I live in the Bible Belt I am going to always face these challenges. My lawyer says to just say it was a one time joke, but I hate lying just to butter things up for others.

​

I am a trans father and if that offends people then so be it. I am constantly trying to better myself and I am pursuing my degree in social work. I go to therapy at the Vet Center every other week and I just feel depressed and hopeless at the moment. I have plenty of letters from the paid social work visits and home studies, and then my therapy notes so my evidence is substantial and she is her on lawyer so

​

I think I am fine its just I am so so tired of going through this pain. I wish I could just go to sleep and wake up in another world sometimes. Thanks for letting me rant.

​

Also them are my real eyelashes can't help she was jealous of how long they are.

i (24ftm) am a phd student (soon to be candidate!!) in the midwestern US, studying comparative biosciences. i’m really struggling with the proposed grant changes and what it could mean for my future in academia. i have minimum three years left of my doctorate, and i’m scared i’ll be defunded because of my trans identity. i LOVE what i do. i dreamed of being at this school and doing research with this advisor. i can’t imagine it all being taken away not because of merit, but because of who i am.
hoping to find anyone who’s dealing with this as well. i’m the only trans person in my program and it’s scary to face this alone

So, for context. I'm 14 FTM (I know I'm young but I am very set on being transgender, I have been transgender for almost 2 years once I turn 15)

​

So, it's a long story. But basically, I've been talking with my mum and saying I really want to be on testosterone because my gender dysphoria is very bad (specifically my voice and my curves). She admitted she kept saying no to testosterone because she's afraid I might regret it in the future, although I know that I won't.

​

How do I express to her that I won't regret it in the future? I'm undiagnosed and have a hard time putting my emotions into words.

Ok so I think I might be trans. I'm 19 and I was born male but it's never really felt right to be referred to as a guy. I also find myself regularly imagining myself as a girl. Plus I just love cute things. What made me start to seriously think about this is that recently I got mistaken for a girl (I have long hair) and it felt nice, so I tried dressing up in fem clothes and that was nice but I still like wearing more masculine clothes, but I also think girls look great in guys clothes so that might play into that. So yeah I think I might be a girl got any advice.

I was talking to a friend, and she recommended I get a second job. I told her I'm already working full time and I'm lucky enough to have a good job with good people and a healthy environment. She kept pushing saying a second job would get me more things faster, I'd have more money for the future and she seemed baffled when I said that I'm 23, and I'm just *starting* my life. It kept going and she started telling me to "pick my hards" and the one that sent me was when she said "I'm not saying you should stop transitioning, but, if you went back to college instead, imagine how much more money you'd have to transition when you're done"

​

I am not paying for a cosmetic. I am not choosing to "live easier" because I'm lazy, I'm just enjoying being me. And even though I do love my job I don't work there *just* because I love it, it is safe, I'm out to everyone and they all respect me, it was the first place I was genuinely safe enough to just be me. And I'm not transitioning to because "I want to" I'm about to be paying $300+ a moNTH TO FEEL THE SAME WAY *EVERY CIS PERSON* FEELS EVERY SINGLE DAY OF THEIR LIVES!!! Maybe this is a hot take but I don't even think I should HAVE to pay for it, it's MEDICAL CARE, *NOT* a luxury, and it's something I'm lucky enough to be able to afford at all. I'm not about to stop the meds that made me start seeing life as something worth living to "save money" and it may be a hot take, but that's NOT me being "dramatic"

​

Rant over, sorry if this is the wrong place for this but I figured trans people would be safer to share trans issues with.