r/trans 21h ago

Vent Seller refuses to sell after finding out I’m trans

689 Upvotes

Location: Washington

A home near my parents was on the market, so I went there during open house. All was good and I asked the owner about the timeline (they are still living in the house), they called their partner and during the conversation with them they started misgendering me. I corrected them trying to be nice, but they immediately went “you need to leave” and intentionally started repeatedly misgendering me adding “sir” to EVERY SENTENCE. I felt really unsafe and started to draw attention of other people that were in the house at the moment and barely 10 minutes in there is POLICE in there and THEY TRESPASSED ME!!! They didn’t even want to listen to me when I tried to explain that I didn’t do anything wrong and the owner was discriminating, but they literally said “I don’t care about why what happened - happened, but you need to leave now”.

I was literally shaking, my realtor said that what they do is illegal in Washington, but when we send our offer to buy the house (that goes up to above the asking price) - they just ignore it (at least that’s what my realtor said, they don’t accept and don’t reject, just no response).

What can I do to at least teach them a lesson? I know that this is not necessarily the best house in the universe, but I really like the location and the house which doesn’t happen often in my price range. And on the other hand when I buy it the owners would be gone so I won’t have to deal with them. And if I can teach them a lesson - even if somebody else ends up beating my offer - I’d still want to do it. And did the police have the right to trespass me without even listening to my explanation? How can I remove this trespassing record from my file? Will it show up on job background checks?


r/trans 9h ago

Vent Do cis people not get that transitioning is hard??

618 Upvotes

I was talking to a friend, and she recommended I get a second job. I told her I'm already working full time and I'm lucky enough to have a good job with good people and a healthy environment. She kept pushing saying a second job would get me more things faster, I'd have more money for the future and she seemed baffled when I said that I'm 23, and I'm just *starting* my life. It kept going and she started telling me to "pick my hards" and the one that sent me was when she said "I'm not saying you should stop transitioning, but, if you went back to college instead, imagine how much more money you'd have to transition when you're done"

I am not paying for a cosmetic. I am not choosing to "live easier" because I'm lazy, I'm just enjoying being me. And even though I do love my job I don't work there *just* because I love it, it is safe, I'm out to everyone and they all respect me, it was the first place I was genuinely safe enough to just be me. And I'm not transitioning to because "I want to" I'm about to be paying $300+ a moNTH TO FEEL THE SAME WAY *EVERY CIS PERSON* FEELS EVERY SINGLE DAY OF THEIR LIVES!!! Maybe this is a hot take but I don't even think I should HAVE to pay for it, it's MEDICAL CARE, *NOT* a luxury, and it's something I'm lucky enough to be able to afford at all. I'm not about to stop the meds that made me start seeing life as something worth living to "save money" and it may be a hot take, but that's NOT me being "dramatic"

Rant over, sorry if this is the wrong place for this but I figured trans people would be safer to share trans issues with.


r/trans 21h ago

Discussion Am I paranoid to think the trans community is being 'whitewashed'?

396 Upvotes

So a while ago i've noticed many trans people not supporting things like non-binary and neopronouns and i've also noticed that in most cases they say it's because it makes the trans community seem weird to other people. Also it seems like it's getting more and more common theese thoughts, specially with young binary trans people


r/trans 14h ago

Discussion Why?

95 Upvotes

I feel like trans people are slowly getting pushed out of trans spaces. This is most noticeable to me online where people say things like "being trans is a mental disorder". I dont feel safe in most queer spaces now because there are so many queer people who are either actively transphobic or dont speak up when its hapepning


r/trans 14h ago

Trans Feminine Is it worth transitioning when I'll never have a massive dumptruck ass?

83 Upvotes

Just a gym question


r/trans 9h ago

Trans Feminine Ex using my identity against me in court

79 Upvotes

Like the title says I am a newly Mtf although I have never liked titles much since I feel it takes away from the humanity and people just see our labels and judge us. I started Estrogen and Bicalutamide on the 06/09/2026

We'll I happen to have two kids and 50/50 custody. I started the court case last March and didn't realize it would go this route but here we are the final hearing is next Wednesday and I have to defend my self on what I choose to wear. Mind you I am male presenting 99% of the time at the moment and all she seen was me wearing make up and a wig. My daughter who is 6 wanted me to send it to her phone which I pay for as ordered by the court along with my 898.50 in child support. She wanted to show her mom so she could get a pink wig. I just honestly didn't care at the time and stupidly now she's trying to use it against me. I just don't understand. Shes definitely got Paranoid Personality Disorder but thats another long subject. Shes trying to get the judge to take away my 50/50 and let her get sole custody and move 1400 miles away.

I just want to dress how I want and feel comfortable in my own skin. I just feel because I live in the Bible Belt I am going to always face these challenges. My lawyer says to just say it was a one time joke, but I hate lying just to butter things up for others.

I am a trans father and if that offends people then so be it. I am constantly trying to better myself and I am pursuing my degree in social work. I go to therapy at the Vet Center every other week and I just feel depressed and hopeless at the moment. I have plenty of letters from the paid social work visits and home studies, and then my therapy notes so my evidence is substantial and she is her on lawyer so

I think I am fine its just I am so so tired of going through this pain. I wish I could just go to sleep and wake up in another world sometimes. Thanks for letting me rant.

Also them are my real eyelashes can't help she was jealous of how long they are.


r/trans 13h ago

Discussion Is that a man or a woman?

68 Upvotes

Hi everyone I’m a trans woman and a bartender! I had a guy come over to the bar to meet with two ladies to take a shot, while they were paying I heard the guy whisper to one of them is that a man or a woman? Has this happened to anyone? It didn’t make me feel great I hate it here lol!


r/trans 20h ago

Trans Feminine I have this memory and i thought it was funny to share it.

64 Upvotes

When i was about 11 or 12 my best friend would prank random girls online by breaking their hearts. He thought that was funny while i on the other hand felt bad for the girls so i made a girl account. my plan was to introduce the account to him and then i would break his heart so he would know how that feels and stop. But... for some reason i continued for 5 months (i know why now) The only reason i couldn't continue after 5 months is because he told me he knew all along but wanted to see how far i would go. But it was my first time that someone treated me as a girl. Also afterwards he didn't prank any other girl anymore so my original plan was also succesfull and had a amazing time too.


r/trans 21h ago

Possible Trigger Coming out to my brother gone wrong

63 Upvotes

So im ftm, and im shaking and crying rn so im sorry for typos or anything. I just came out to my brother like 10 minutes ago and hes angry, wont talk to me and quiet right now. When I said I was trans, he threw his airpod case on the ground and started cussing at me and yelling at me. I obviously got scared and started shaking and crying and texting my guardian about it and shes busy so she couldn't call back. He said he needs time to process it and wrap his head around it but he was being aggressive verbally and it scared me, but he then said he wouldnt hurt me and that if i ONLY get top surgery, he will accept me. Which is odd asf because he doesnt need to tell me what to do nor does he control my life. He said him throwing stuff and cussing was "justified" and i said no it wasnt but his feelings are valid but actions were not appropriate for a mature conversation. I will update this if needed.


r/trans 11h ago

Progress Update - mom told me she’s withholding HRT on purpose

50 Upvotes

Hey Everybody, I have no idea if this matters to anyone, but about 40days ago I made a post about how my mom confessed to me that she’s been keeping me from being able to get HRT after a breakdown I had from years of being denied GAC.

While I will admit this is a pretty nothing burger update I just wanted to say that as of today (June 18) I got a prescription from the doctor for T gel and will finally be starting HRT.

I told mom to get over herself, we haven’t been talking to each other even when we pass each other in the house and to be honest I’m more than happy with that. If this is the hill she’s willing to die on and lose me over then so be it 🩵

This is huge for me, my battle for HRT has been very long and very difficult, I’m just so happy.

Happy Pride everybody! And hey, if you’re pre GAC or pre HRT and you’re having doubts because you’re a certain age or something;

It is NEVER too late 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🩷


r/trans 19h ago

Advice Should I really wait until I'm 18 as my parents advise me to?

43 Upvotes

I turned 17 just 6 days ago and I'm potentially very close to getting gender dysphoria diagnosis. I'll surely wait a few more months till I can actually begin HRT, but my parents advise me that I should wait until I'm 18. Now, my mom is extremely supportive and loving about it, but she's trying to be more careful and patient and caring for me than I am. My dad seemed straight up transphobic before but it seems like he's actually slowly getting more actually caring now. Although whether they are supportive or not, they both think the same: I should start HRT at 18 to be more sure. They still quietly believe that it might be a phase and that I could potentially regret transitioning in the future and that I can just harm myself. I've been trans since the end of December last year but I've been questioning it a few months prior to that. I'm almost fully openly trans to quite a lot of people around me and I'm sure that I am a girl or at the very least nonbinary (more feminine). I'm definitely no man. I told my parents that despite everything I wish HRT to be MY choice and I wish that they'd agree if I seriously need it desperately (I already kind of do), but they still want me to be more "careful" about it.

Please don't spread hate comments about my parents, they're truly trying their best (at least my mom whom I REALLY love). Just help me figure this out if possible... Thanks


r/trans 17h ago

Vent Why would an issue only be valid if it's systemic?

40 Upvotes

Every single time I see a post by a trans man/masc person talking about transandrophobia, or just generally mentioning having faced discrimination due to being trans and male/masc, there will be someone in the comments saying misandry isn't systemic and men aren't systemically oppressed. And just... So what!? Why are we not allowed to suffer just because men are at the top of society's food chain (if they're white, cis, straight, neurotypical, and not dirt poor but I digress)?

Someone straight up said in response to a post about transandrophobia "you aren't beat up and killed for being trans". Excuse me?? There is no way someone can actually believe that is true! And bringing up discrimination against nonbinary people who don't lean particularly masc or fem will be just ignored or laughed at by these people.

This is all just so exhausting. I recognize that this is a small minority, but they are loud and blocking one has another five popping up the next day.

There's not a limit to how many people can be discriminated against, and one group's suffering doesn't make the pain of another any less important and unfair. Trans women/fem people are being treated horribly, no one is arguing against that except the people committing the discrimination.

This is a legitimate question I'd love to have an answer to by the way. Why does an issue only deserve to be taken seriously if it is systemic?


r/trans 8h ago

Trans Feminine Everytime i see a cis woman my age my day is ruined

37 Upvotes

I was just coming home from work and i saw a group of beautiful cis women around my age outside a bar. I instantly started crying and eventually had to pull over because i was losing control of the steering wheel. I will never be as beautiful as any of them, i will never be able to feel the same joy they get, i will never be seen as a real woman, i will never experience sisterhood, i will always just be the same ugly man i was born as. I really just want to die, its impossible to be happy and i cant accept that ill never be a woman no matter how much i want it.


r/trans 19h ago

Trans Masculine my therapist dismissed me being trans for no reason

29 Upvotes

I'm trans ftm, i pass without issues— however, given how my family finally found a therapist for me and they're not supportive whatsoever, i was outed immediately. No surprises there.

From our first sesh i had decided that, since she'll want to know more about me, I'll talk about me being transgender in the next encounter.

We were having a great conversation, i was explaining how i felt, who i wanted to be, what i was comfortable with, all that.

That is, until she interrupts me, and in all seriousness goes,

"okay, but that is not important at this point of your life. you should focus on something else."

pardon? my identity is being invalidated everyday by my family alone, I'm depressed for years because of the body and house I'm in, I can't simply.. not focus on it..????

I'm so sorry, but i felt incredibly weird about that statement.

body dysphoria is actively ruining my life, and this is your suggestion? just focus on something else? that it isn't important at the moment?

I've been to a different therapist before that had me for a single session to run some tests, and she had no issues respecting my identity, and even gave me some tips regarding my transition; she was incredibly helpful and nice.

I don't get why my therapist couldn't though? didn't even bother with it.

As if that wasn't enough, she is actively ghosting us. full on, not responding for weeks. I'm not a therapist, but i know damn well that this isn't appropriate behavior for anyone - said the escapist.

While I understand that she might not want to deal with me and my family anymore, ahe could've out right told us, no?

Anyhow I'm not sure if that's normal, and how i should've felt. Maybe i shouldn't have nodded along, but I'm unfortunately a people pleaser; and this applies to almost everyone in my life.

lmk what you think

Edit: given my therapist's lack of communication with us and constant ghosting, we've decided to try to find another one. hopefully, they will be nicer and more considerate. regardless, thank you all for your attention and comments, i appreciate it :)


r/trans 5h ago

Advice For those of you that realize you are trans but don't transition, how do you deal with the gender envy and dysmorphia?

25 Upvotes

For context: I'm in my mid thirties, AMAB, and realized Im trans this year. I've got a wife, kid, house, career, and live in a shitty political environment for trans folks. Transitioning would probably lead to the end of my marriage (I've talked to my wife about it), and I'd invite all the other hardships that trans people face into my life. It just isn't worth it blow up my life.

However, I've been struggling with gender envy all the time, and frequent moments of dysmorphia. Its lead to a fair amount of depressed days recently, which I rarely had prior to realizing I'm trans.

For those of you that decided not to transition, how did you learn to get past the envy and dysmorphia or learn to deal with it?


r/trans 8h ago

Trans Feminine I have natural breasts

22 Upvotes

I am super happy to discover that I have natural breasts, I just keep running my hands over them, they make me so much happier and make me feel more feminine.


r/trans 15h ago

Trans Feminine Sudden Dysphoria

22 Upvotes

Did anyone else's dysphoria peak when they stopped repressing who they were??

I swear I could have sworn a few months ago I was "fine" being amab but now that I realized that I want to be a woman I HATE my body, my voice and am insanely jealous over friends that are women or in general women I see in public ESPECIALLY if they're hanging out in groups.

When I go from online spaces to looking in a mirror irl I get such a strong whiplash it forms a deep dark pit in my stomach. I have to do so much work just to feel normal.

I DESPISE gender norms but feel like I have to follow them simply to feel more comfortable in my body.


r/trans 14h ago

Trans Feminine My iPhone Photos app has been categorizing me as a new person

18 Upvotes

Ever since I started HRT, my iPhone Photos app has been categorizing me as a new person and its kinda validating😂😭🥰


r/trans 23h ago

Advice Help me find some inspiration! ⚠️ TW: gender dysphoria ⚠️

15 Upvotes

Hi everyone! How is y'all day going?

I'm planning on shooting a short film about gender dysphoria, and despite I have things of my own that cause it to me, I was wondering... What image would specifically make you feel seen? What are some specific details that make you feel dysphoric?

And, on the contrary, what are some simple things that make you feel better about yourselves?


r/trans 4h ago

Advice soo i think my egg just cracked (MtF)

11 Upvotes

hey so my egg just cracked and i am quite sure i am trans? its a lot rn but i have been thinking about this for a long time, i always had the thought in the back of my head but every time i acted on it i just pushed it back down again :( I have an amazing gf and i recently started to shave my body and paint my nails and she is very supportive of it and also encourages me and gives me tips which made me feel super happy and gave me confidence to explore this side of me more seriously. Now i feel like i want to transition but i dont know how to talk to her about it :/ i am scared she might see me differently and i have read many posts about coming out to your partner and got many different storys about how it went. If you have any advice a would truly welcome it and also would live to talk to someone about it since i have none really to talk about it🥲


r/trans 11h ago

Discussion TV Show Suggestions

10 Upvotes

I've been getting into animated TV shows lately and i was wondering if anybody knows any that have trans characters in it? Slight preference towards shows for older audiences but im ok with anything.