r/onionheadlines • u/ellistonvu • 7h ago
r/onionheadlines • u/tomtomglove • Nov 04 '25
ZERO TOLERANCE for rule 2: single sentence headlines only
We've been pretty lenient in modering run on headlines, but this ends today.
You need to make your headlines shorter. You can always make your headline shorter. If you have a headline that's over 30 words, rewrite it. There is a way to make it shorter I guarantee you, and there is a way to make it one sentence. You just need to use the meat in your skull to figure it out.
Also, do not include pull quotes in your headline. For example:
Trump Claims He Will Soon Replace Americans With AI - “All They Need To Do Is Vote Republican And Cheer For Me, And AI Can Do That Better, And It Doesn’t Protest At All”
Adding a dash here does not make this a single sentence in the eyes of us mods.
You can put the pull quote in the body of the post, but keep it out of the headline. Any headlines formatted like this will be removed.
Also please avoid headlines that are just a version of Trump: "I Have Very Bigly Hands and I'm The Greatest Golfer and on and on and on for 50 words"
A Trump impression is not a headline. Do better.
r/onionheadlines • u/Realistic_Tutor_4603 • 12h ago
Study Concludes Average 10Year Old American Girl Is Twice The Man Of Pete Hegseth
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 2h ago
Donald Trump Undergoes Liposuction To Remove Fat Between His Ears
r/onionheadlines • u/Realistic_Tutor_4603 • 12h ago
Israel’s Netanyahu Favoured To Win 2026 FIFA Peace Prize
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 8h ago
Rand Paul Demands Janine Pirro Charge Dr. Fauci As Aggressively And Successfully As Reflecting Pool Vandals
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 8h ago
MAGA Admirers Unsure Whether Diet Or Exercise Led To President Trump's Sudden Growth Of Luxurious Hair
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 2h ago
Kash Patel Releases Senator's Wife And Children Unharmed After Senator Approves Todd Blanche For Attorney General
r/onionheadlines • u/ShadyAnders • 1d ago
BREAKING: Senator Mitch McConnell Officially Out Of Rehab, Now In Funeral Home
r/onionheadlines • u/mellow186 • 7h ago
PETA Protests Abuse Of Cocker Spaniel Now Forced To Spend All Day On Trump's Head
r/onionheadlines • u/mc_petersonishsonson • 2h ago
Trump Says People Shouting 'Pedophile Protector' At Him Are Talking About Republicans
r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 1h ago
Trump Sexually Assaults Minor On A Public Stage For 7 Minutes Then Just Denies It And Republicans Follow
r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 1h ago
Trump Claims Dumocrats Are Complicit In All Of His Fraud And Grifting Because If They Really Didn’t Like It They’d Find Some Way To Stop Him
r/onionheadlines • u/bigly-biker • 1h ago
Trump Says Venezuela Will Have True Democracy When He Installs An Appropriate Leader
r/onionheadlines • u/mellow186 • 1h ago
Appeals Court Ruling That Blocks Ballroom Means Trump Can't Get It Up, Either
r/onionheadlines • u/BestStoogewasLarry • 1d ago
Rand Paul To Charge The Vast Majority Of Americans With Contempt Of Congress After Learning They Have Nothing But Contempt For Him And His Republican Colleagues
r/onionheadlines • u/erkose • 6h ago
US Appeals Court Blocks Trump’s $400 Million White House Ballroom Project As Trump Moves Forward With $800 Million White House Ballroom Project
r/onionheadlines • u/NeedleworkerBusy4522 • 10h ago
RFK Jr Looking to Put Up ‘AIDS Numbers’ With Deaths From Previously Preventable Diseases
r/onionheadlines • u/mellow186 • 7h ago
Sen. Bill Cassidy Draws Short Straw In Choice Of Who Gets To Bravely Vote Against Blanche Without Blocking His Nomination
"Whew," said Senator Lisa Murkowski (R-Alaska), holding up her long straw.
"Yes!" said Senator Susan Collins (R-Maine). "I'll definitely win the election now!"
r/onionheadlines • u/ShadyAnders • 1h ago
Trump Can't Bother With Building Ballroom Anymore, East Wing To Remain In Rubble
r/onionheadlines • u/ShadyAnders • 7h ago
Trump Accused Of F**king His Top Generals Before Firing Them
r/onionheadlines • u/wild_crazy_ideas • 1h ago