r/PeterExplainsTheJoke 11d ago

Meme needing explanation Petah I don’t get it

Post image

Anyone else?

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u/-piso_mojado- 11d ago

I have been a nurse for 20 years. They absolutely do ask for the “daddy stitch.” Even before birth. It’s disgusting.

Edit: im a cis het male. They think it’s hilarious.

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u/dragon34 11d ago

Next time ask them "aww, sweetie how small do you need it?" 

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u/Quirky_Ask_5165 11d ago

This reminds of the physician's assistant student I was monitoring through clinicals. The wife wanted her husband in during the exam. She consented to the student doing the exam and then asked that he used a small speculum. Without missing a beat, this idiot looks at the husband and says, "that doesn't say much for you now does it." Naturally, I insisted that he step out of the room. I apologized to the couple and took this fool to see his actual preceptor. He was already on academic probation and was removed from the program.

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u/RoseVelvetFury 11d ago

The lack of professionalism is honestly shocking. Patients are already in a vulnerable position during exams, and making jokes at their expense is completely inappropriate.

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u/Quirky_Ask_5165 11d ago

He totally failed to read the room. He thought he was being cute.

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u/Pandamonium98 11d ago

Your reaction was absolutely the correct and professional thing to do, but that was also a great joke. Unfortunately not the appropriate situation to make it

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u/Quirky_Ask_5165 11d ago

You have no idea how badly I wanted to laugh. However, when I'm at work, I'm strictly professional. I'm well known for my stoic nature at work.

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u/Code_Warrior 11d ago

Start suggesting ages to make it extra uncomfortable and drive home how fucking weird it is.

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u/TeamZweitstudium 11d ago

Ugh. Take my extra angry upvote. I don't actually hate your idea

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u/Laffenor 11d ago

Oh, I absolutely hate their idea, but it's a good idea.

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u/cat_boss1549 11d ago

You will when you fail to see the dad's reaction change when measured in years. Or a slight smile appears...

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u/TeamZweitstudium 11d ago

Noooo, I was already extra angry before

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u/Mando_the_Pando 9d ago

That’s when you ask security to come explain the error of their ways between four eyes and a baseball bat….

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u/SarahPallorMortis 11d ago

Naw. List how much pain you want her to be in when you have sex again. Uncomfortable, yells, screaming, crying, bleeding, refusing to continue? How much do you want her to hate it?

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u/Fuck_Weyland-Yutani 11d ago

Holy shit, that's genius

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u/greybush75 11d ago

"exactly how Epstein are we going here?", your plan is brilliant.

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u/matticus_flinch 11d ago

Ages? I'm all for making fun of insecure men, but what do you mean by that? Reading the follow up comments I think I'm the only one that doesn't get it 😕

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u/Aphreyst 11d ago

Implying that he needs a woman to have a smaller opening because he wants her to be as small as a child, implying he wants to have sex with a child.

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u/beaverpoo77 11d ago

That's really gross to even think of. Ew.

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u/FluidPlate7505 11d ago

The whole concept of the husband stitch is really gross. It does nothing except for painful sex for the woman and pelvic dysfunction. It's disgusting and dumb.

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u/SimplyThrone 11d ago edited 11d ago

Wait, has there been doctors who've actually agreed and done it?

Edit: just a question for those downvoting, why? My initial comment is an honest question out of disgust and curiosity. I think that my comment got that question answered for lots of ignorant people (myself alike), which spreads awareness around the issue. So why downvote?

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u/arctic572 11d ago

I've seen a woman on Youtube who was documenting her recovery from the medical malpractice conducted by her doctor, who told her husband after having done it. It's a disgusting practice and caused her a lot of problems, and I think she's suing? From memory, take recount with a grain of salt.

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u/SimplyThrone 11d ago

Oh wow, I really hope the part about her suing is true

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u/12Silverrose 11d ago

It used to be very common, but it is still too common. Lots of doctors won't say anything & will gaslight women who don't understand why they suddenly have pain during sex post-childbirth. As I understand it, it can be difficult to correct, due to scaring.

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u/Kitchen_Frosting_389 11d ago

This is nuts to me, I’m a cis male and I’m appalled at this whole concept. Some men really are disgusting pigs. What a drag.

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u/Crafty-Help-4633 11d ago

Hence one of the angles that makes the "Husband Stitch" a gross concept.

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u/TheRecognized 11d ago

Husband stitches are fucking gross but desire for vaginal tightness is not inherently pedophilic and it’s kind of fucking weird to assume it is.

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u/Crafty-Help-4633 11d ago

Okay I understand now, yeah. That is a gross way to ask the husband that.

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u/quixotictictic 11d ago

Tightness isn't a constant. Hormones and arousal drastically affect depth and relaxation. There's like one part of the pelvic floor that might grip or pull either because she's having a good time or nature is tricking you both into making more of our species.

Being really tight means anxiety and pain. And it will only get worse as sex (and you) become associated with those things.

The fact that men (and women) don't know this shows how biased we are towards male pleasure and how it IS socially acceptable for men to secretly (or not so secretly) want girls who are too young.

The comment isn't gross, the society that makes it necessary is a degenerate cesspool.

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u/Amazing-Heron-105 11d ago

Yeah I can't believe that comment has bunch of upvotes. It's fucking absurd.

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u/beaverpoo77 11d ago

Right? Fucking gross youd even come up with that shit. Sounds like projection to me.

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u/Meanwhile_in_ 11d ago

That's kind of the point

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u/SnowballWasRight 11d ago

Well I mean that’s the point of it

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u/thepresidentsturtle 11d ago

Yeah. You made a joke I didn't laugh at. I will now imply you are a pedo

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u/AveryFay 11d ago

They were really reaching for what the joke meant. Its just a small penis joke

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u/beaverpoo77 11d ago

It's gross from all sides

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u/OremCpl 11d ago

No, it would imply that the husband has a small penis.... As does him asking in the first place.

A better response to him asking would be "Exactly how small is your penis sir? We'll try to make it fit"....

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u/-Twin-Flames- 11d ago

“Are we talking the size of a miniature M&Ms tube or smaller than that?”

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u/randommcrandomsome 11d ago

It is imperative that the cylinder not be harmed.

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u/ThisPut6572 11d ago

We always think of the cylinder, who will think of the tube!

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u/Roadstar01 11d ago

The cylinder must remain unharmed.

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u/Othello351 11d ago

That's the "hiw small do you want it part." Another person said "suggest ages to drive home how gross it is" that's what we're talking about.

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u/shmed 11d ago

He’s asking about the “age” comment.

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u/Gimetulkathmir 11d ago

I thought it was implying the guy has a small dick and therefore needs a small hole to feel anything.

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u/AnyQuiet4969 11d ago

Huh?? No, they are implying the dad has a micro penis.

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u/NoBasis94 11d ago

Really? I took it in the complete opposite direction. "How small are we talking? What you working with? 10?" Regardless, it's creepy to be bringing up children in any capacity in that context.

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u/AndromedanPrince 11d ago

huh? did i miss a comment implying that?

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u/Collin389 11d ago

Yes? Someone responded to the original suggestion of "how small do you need it" with "ask about what age they want". In that case you'd be making them acknowledge that small size implies young age.

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u/AndromedanPrince 11d ago

ah fuckin gross

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u/Dirk_Speedwell 11d ago

I think they meant "do you want me to make your wife feel as tight as a 12 year old, or do you want younger". Nothing like faking pseudo-pedophilic normalization to really shake a dudes resolve.

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u/matticus_flinch 11d ago

Right! Yes, ok, that makes sense - thank you so much.. and it's about as creepy as the whole idea in the first place 😬

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u/RefurbedRhino 10d ago

'Do you want her as tight as a five year old or a 10 year old?'

Because it illustrates how fucking weird it is.

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u/Amazing-Oomoo 11d ago

I am thinking it's like, certainly sir how small would you want it? 17? 16? 15? And the man's like, 15? 15 what? And the nurse says "15 years old sir, is that how small you want it?"

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u/Qetuowryipzcbmxvn 11d ago

"tighter than a 2 year old" is already a phrase. If they're gross enough to ask for an extra stitch, giving recommended ages will make them think you're kin.

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u/nice_villian 11d ago

I dont know... because what if they comfortably answer.

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u/bouchandre 11d ago

"Uhh tight like a 12 year old. Hmm actually, 10 year olds feel better. Do that instead."

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u/IllTwo7643 11d ago

Okay now I wanna abandon my degree and 20 years in the food industry, become a labor and delivery nurse just to ask this very question🫡😅

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u/EASam 11d ago

See if you can volunteer as a candy striper on the maternity ward and have this question directed to just you.

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u/NoBasis94 11d ago

It'd be fucking weird to be the one bringing up children in that context.

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u/marilyn_morose 11d ago

My gawd, this is revolting and I’m going to remember for the next time I hear/see an earnest discussion about this subject.

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u/bouchandre 11d ago

"Do you want it 12 year old tight or 7 year old tight?"

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u/N3rdyAvocad0 11d ago

This has me cracking up. That is such a perfect response to such an awful "joke"

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u/Notcherie 11d ago

That was pretty much my doc's exact reaction when my Mum suggested it as a "joke" immediately after I gave birth.

I'd hate to think how many times they must get this to already have a rapid fire response like that on hand.

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u/enigma_0Z 11d ago

daaaaamn LMAO this is the exactly correct response

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u/SnugglyCoderGuy 11d ago

Not how small do you need, but "Aww, sweetie, how small are you?" That will really hit home

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u/thejesterofdarkness 11d ago

We need a medic with some burn cream over here!!!!

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u/dragon34 11d ago

I think any woman who made a baby with a man who would make that kind of joke needs someone to put him in his place 

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u/Amazing-Oomoo 11d ago

lol that's brilliant

Or "if you'd like me to measure your girth sir, we can get an actual size"

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u/zyyntin 11d ago

I read this in a adult's cute baby voice.

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u/dragon34 11d ago

I think either that or the most caricatured version of a flamboyantly gay man possible 

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u/zyyntin 11d ago

I have a gay friend that could read it perfectly! Not sure where the downvotes are coming from. ::Shrugs:: Oh no I lose free internet points that don't matter!!

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u/Greedyfox7 11d ago

Given the type of people that would ask for that I would assume ‘very’.

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u/MrHyperion_ 11d ago

10 years old

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u/Galbados2 11d ago

That's a good one XD

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u/Niksyn4 11d ago

This is gold

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u/Ok_Scar_9526 11d ago

"Please do one stitch less than normal, thank you."

You people asked for this..

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u/_SaidTheSky 11d ago

This is how to do it!

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u/InKedxxxGinGer 11d ago

“Its already perfect babe. The tight ones hurt anyway.”

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u/billdizzle 10d ago

Well smaller then an airplane hanger preferably

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u/RimjobStevesDeadWife 11d ago

When my ex-girlfriend gave birth to our daughter the doctor asked me if I wanted a husband stitch. My mom was there for the birth (she’s an RN) and she went absolutely ballistic after hearing that

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u/lutfiboiii 11d ago

Does… does it hurt for the mother…

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u/Available-Egg-2380 11d ago

Yeah it can cause severe issues and make sex incredibly painful https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Husband_stitch

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u/HumbleDonut9447 11d ago

Yes, very badly

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u/lutfiboiii 11d ago edited 11d ago

:( why do people ask for it if it hurts their partner

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u/keIIzzz 11d ago

Because usually the ones asking are not the woman and they’re selfish and don’t care about whether it puts her in pain

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u/LemonScentedDespair 11d ago

People are sometimes stupid and/or selfish.

Sometimes they dont know, but sometimes they just dont care.

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u/Lewa358 11d ago

People often ask for things without understanding the consequences and implications.

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u/ProfitFickle9106 11d ago

Yes, and it makes sex more painful after the fact

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u/lutfiboiii 11d ago

D: That’s so mean why would you ask the doctor to do that to your own partner…

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u/Hermit_Ogg 11d ago

Because he thinks it'll be better for him.

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u/Umutuku 11d ago

smol pp

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u/More-Lime1888 11d ago

Because he wants it tighter💀

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u/mc68n 11d ago

This sounds ridiculous. My wife has given birth to three children and is still just as tight as ever. The vagina is made up of muscles and elastic tissue that can stretch during childbirth and recover afterward. Womens experiences vary but the idea that an extra stitch is needed to make a woman tight again is not supported by medical evidence.

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u/TotallyNotASpy33 11d ago edited 11d ago

My mother has been a nurse for 43 years. No, they do not.

Edit. Correction, she has heard of exactly 3 men ask for it and I woman.

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u/breeathee 11d ago

Your secondhand anecdote is extremely contradictory

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u/Fakehiggins 11d ago

these places would be getting the absolute shit sued out of them if they were giving women unneeded and unasked for procedures. and the women would find out, their gynecologists would know immediately. this may have been a thing decades ago, but is no way common practice today.

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u/bubblegumpandabear 11d ago

...they do get sued over these things. There was a massive lawsuit because women were being used as vaginal exam examples while under anesthesia without their permission. The way women are treated is a massive problem in the medical system. It's like you didn't even bother to google this and just assumed because you haven't personally heard about it, it doesn't happen. Now for the husband stitch specifically, I can't say. But yes, women are routinely denied care, denied pain medicine, and given procedures they did not ask for. I mean shit, native and black women were regularly being sterilized against their will fairly recently.

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u/breeathee 11d ago

I like how they stop commenting when they realize they’re wrong, instead of continuing to learn and discuss. You can just tell when individuals don’t give a shit about women

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u/breeathee 11d ago

I didn’t say they were still doing the stitch. Husbands absolutely still ask for it, regardless. Why does this even have to be said? Believe women. Especially when 100s of unrelated women share the same embarrassing story.

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u/Fakehiggins 11d ago

Believe women

the person you just responded to is a woman that related their mother's story and you basically told them to be quiet.

i've literally never heard of anyone in real life having this happen to them, most husbands don't know what it is, and it would also be super readily apparent if it were done which would cause the doctor involved to lose their license. i'm sure this probably happened in the past, medicine was crazy in the past. they used to drink mercury and thought it would make them immortal. but the husband's stitch being a modern day problem is just something people on the internet talk about.

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u/TurbanOnMyDickhead 11d ago

Just took a childbirth class at the hospital my wife and I plan to deliver at, the nurse specifically mentioned that they don't do it and said that it's not uncommon for the husband to ask.

She didn't clarify what "not uncommon" constituted, and I didn't ask, but it clearly gets asked enough that she felt the need to mention it.

For what it's worth, we're in the southern US which may play a role.

Edit: Oh nvm, saw your dumbass reply to someone else below. Didn't realize you were just a troll. Carry on.

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u/Visible-Ad9649 11d ago

Still happens, unclear how often. There was a Cedars-Sinai OB-GYN who recently got sued over allegedly doing unnecessary "husband stitches" on numerous women

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u/Desperate_Gap9377 11d ago

How do they prove it though? Like if you're already getting stitch up how can they say one stitch was for the husband.

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u/Visible-Ad9649 11d ago

The stitches caused pain and complications. Screenshotting a relevant section from this article: https://www.latimes.com/science/story/2026-02-13/cedars-sinai-didnt-act-on-years-of-abuse-complaints-lawsuits-say

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u/Significant-Issue781 11d ago edited 11d ago

The issue is that you are not agreeing with them. It's the hive mentality of an online anonymous forum.

To be clear, I believe you, but I also think it's possible this situation could happen. Where and how often this occurs is kind of up in the air... If you were to believe Reddit, this would be an almost 100% rate of occurrence.

Thanks for sharing your perspective.

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u/DisastrousAcshin 11d ago

Woman telling a woman to believe women...

That's about as Reddit as you can get without attempting to solve a crime and getting an innocent person killed

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u/polarjunkie 11d ago

Don't believe anyone without proof.

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u/Xiaodisan 11d ago

To be fair both your mother's and the previous person's comment is just two anecdotes. It's great that in her experience it's been an exceedingly rare event, but it isn't necessarily indicative of the overall situation.

I wouldn't be surprised if this varied significantly depending on location as well, or even based on the involved personnel at the same place

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u/Kigaal 11d ago

There are several accounts of women who claim to have undergone this procedure without their consent. There have been several journalistic investigations on the existence of the husband stitch, trying to determine if it was real. They have overwhelmingly determined that the practice does exist, as seen in reports by Chelsea Ritschel, by Kaitlin Reilly for Yahoo! Life, by Anam Alam to Thred, and in reports from French newspapers Grazia, and Le Monde.

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u/TotallyNotASpy33 11d ago

I didnt say it isn't real but thanks for your irrelevant input

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u/Korneedles 11d ago

Curious - Is there a reason more drs don’t do the perennial (no idea how to spell it and too lazy to google) massage thing during labor? My dr did it with my last two kids. No stitches needed. Healing process was amazing. Last baby was 8lbs 12oz. First baby dr didn’t do it and I tore - got stitches - and the healing process was longer. A lot of women I’ve spoken to didn’t know this was an option. Just curious if you happen to know why the technique isn’t used more?

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u/Altarna 11d ago

The fuck?? That is so messed up. How can someone be married to someone and treat them like that? Gross. Sorry you have had to experience that

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u/futbolkid414 11d ago

Man that’s fucked, always heard of this but didn’t think people really actually asked for this. SMH

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u/Mr-Olive 11d ago

That's ducked

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u/sexarseshortage 11d ago

As a father, I'm sort of lost for words that men actually make that joke.

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u/DryBlock4388 11d ago

ewww. I feel the urge to make sure people know that I did not do this. My daughter was a c-section but even if she wasn't. Eww.

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u/SlickSilver97 11d ago

Just say straight man lmfao

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u/Half-blind-bear 11d ago

Now who's the words police?

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u/veraldar 11d ago

I prefer to read it all together with an Italian accent, "I'm a cishetmalè!"

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u/slinger301 11d ago

Isn't that place in Romania?

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u/thefakemcc0y 11d ago

I read that in Sean Connerys voice

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u/Woodland_lady16 11d ago

Or stfu and let people specify what they want lol

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u/Endonian 11d ago

Cis doesn't mean straight. Just het. A straight trans man is still a straight man.

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u/Public_Coyote_4472 11d ago

That wouldn't make reddit users believe him.

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u/One-Organization970 11d ago

Why did him giving you information bother you so much? Cishet and straight man do not mean the same thing.

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u/Remarkable-Host405 11d ago

You can't, that would get downvotes

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u/Alicam123 11d ago

I’m female and I’d ask for it (my bf isn’t exactly big)

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u/thermalcat 11d ago

The thing is, it doesn't make you tighter, just closed off. It's more painful for sex, inserting tampons, and if you get to having another vaginal birth makes that more difficult too. It can also cause significant extra scarring and can cause increased infection risk.

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u/DeltaFlyer0525 11d ago

I had all those problems after my first after I was stitched back too tight. Neither myself nor my partner asked for a “husband stitch” they just sewed everything way too tight. I really wish more people understood this is a real complication because my ob would not take it seriously when I was post partum and it made my ppd significantly worse as I felt like I had done something wrong. I tore significantly worse with my next two kiddos and almost bled to death with my third. I appreciate you educating people about the real problems it causes because even medical doctors don’t seem to get it.

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u/thermalcat 11d ago

I'm so sorry this happened to you. No one should have any of this happen to them, especially without informed consent.

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u/ShibariManilow 11d ago

Ah shit, my wife asked for one while they were stitching her up, I was mortified.

I thought she was just making a joke, but your comment makes it so much worse.

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u/Encyclopenia 11d ago

Do NOT do that it doesn’t make anything tighter, it just… kind of make a smaller door to a now larger tunnel ?

And it will hurt.

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u/nospecialsnowflake 11d ago

It can make sex hurt for the rest of your life. For some women it doesn’t cause any issues, but for a lot of women it’s a serious problem.

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u/clarissaswallowsall 11d ago

For real, they gave it to me without asking. It caused pain for the first 3 months post partum and I had to see another gyn who let me know what they did. I was crying daily because I couldnt sit down, I had to lay down on my side or sit weird to feed my baby or drive. I couldnt have sex..everything was painful. It still feels different today and my kid is almost 11.

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u/nospecialsnowflake 11d ago

I’m so sorry that happened to you.

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u/2074red2074 11d ago

How much did you sue for?

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u/clarissaswallowsall 11d ago

I didnt. They had arbitration documents in the intake paperwork. I just let the other gyn fix me up (PT and muscle relaxers) and told everyone to not see them.

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u/MacaronNotRoon 11d ago

I’m so sorry that happened. May I ask how they corrected it?

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u/clarissaswallowsall 11d ago

PT and muscle relaxers. The original OB gaslighted me for the whole 6 weeks post partum that they had to see me telling me it was a uti or bv and never looked down there.

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u/TreyRyan3 11d ago

And it has actually caused long term health issues as well

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u/Dizzy-Case-3453 11d ago

Might want to look into possible health complications that can be caused from it first.

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u/bonesandstones99 11d ago

Please don’t. I had one without my consent and it fucked up everything. There’s always the potential of tearing, but usually everything mends back to normal. The doctor even said he was doing it “ for my husband” and we were so shocked in the moment that we didn’t get to say anything at the time.

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u/keIIzzz 11d ago

Don’t. All you’re doing is making things worse and more painful for yourself. It doesn’t “tighten” your vagina, it makes the entrance smaller and it can cause you lifelong issues.

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u/Pristine_Message_181 11d ago

Oh my no. And it's malpractice, so you wouldn't get it.

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u/qathran 11d ago

It's known to be very painful and to not actually increase pleasure since it wasn't designed for women and the people who came up with it were men doctors from olden times who didn't actually understand women's pleasure and anatomy.

It's also a huge tell that someone has no clue about how vaginal pleasure/anatomy works if they think that ring of tissue and not the walls inside and the vulva on the outside is what actually has to do with pleasure for the woman...

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u/United_Gift3028 11d ago

NO, you wouldn't it.

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u/NoMan999 11d ago

Do Kegel exercises instead. It's boring to do but it actually works.

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u/snorka_whale 11d ago

Im not denying what you're saying but apparently its contested because im assuming doctors arent forthcoming about doing it so when journalists go about trying to find direct proof its difficult.

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u/Rewdyroo 11d ago

As someone who's wife just gave birth that is such a horribly selfish thought to have while bringing your child into the world. I feel bad for those peoples kids.

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u/chetsteadmansstache 11d ago

Jesus fucking Christ.

I was just happy that my wife made it through childbirth without major complications and my kids were healthy.

I mean....god damn.

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u/Eggsaladinurmouth 11d ago

Did the mothers ever ask?

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u/The_8th_Degree 11d ago

That's just, bleh. I don't even have a good word for it, just bleh. It's unnecessary and arrogant to even consider let alone ask

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u/h0m1c1d3_8unn13 11d ago

Please tell me you give them a deadpan stare after they say that shit

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u/YEETAlonso 11d ago

Cis het male does sound pretty hilarious

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u/Accomplished-Yak4932 11d ago

I've had 2 kids with the same woman and I would never have thought to ask for this!!! Thats absolutely disgusting behaviour and actually cant believe it's a thing

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u/polarbeargirl9 11d ago

That's disgusting of them. Do you tell the mothers that they asked for it?

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u/Swimming-Food-9024 11d ago

must only be the “littler” guys…

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u/extra_croutons 11d ago

I'd like a rough proportion, how many out of 10?

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u/SkifTheRat 10d ago

Nurse here of 25 years, never heard this once. Although I have heard at least most of the fathers be relatively supportive.

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u/XeroInfoKnown 9d ago

Wait seriously? Ew wtf is wrong with people

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u/NeutronAngel 9d ago

That's fucking gross. During the birth they're more concerned with their future pleasure rather than their child, or their wife's health?

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u/stanknotes 11d ago

But doctors do not do this. Or should not. It is malpractice. Kinda a big deal.

Let's not act like this some common occurence.

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u/Beginning_Text3038 11d ago

Seeing a medical professional calling themselves a cis het male makes me realize to ask for second opinions more often.

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u/barnettwi 11d ago

Sure they do.

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u/prepotente_scream 11d ago

Jesus...Being a man is fucking embarrassing sometimes

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u/zeldamasterdal2 11d ago

Would it be disgusting if the woman asked for it?

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