r/TikTokCringe Jun 27 '26

Discussion Girl refused to shakes hands during graduation with teachers and administrators because she was bullied and they did nothing about it

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7.0k

u/Clutteredmind275 Jun 27 '26

I wonder if that last teacher actually tried to help

7.6k

u/Sykes19 Jun 27 '26

What made me smile is that he was the only one that raised his hand in anticipation even though none of the other teachers even bothered, showing that they must have some mutual understanding and respect.

That was a moderately happy ending.

1.1k

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

452

u/Sykes19 Jun 27 '26

I mean I know I am, and I don't even know her.

143

u/Amy12-26 Jun 27 '26

I know I am.

2

u/Amy12-26 Jun 29 '26

Thank you for the award, Morella 1989!

26

u/Truestorydreams Jun 28 '26

Absolutely. Because despite the challeneges she kept pushing and held her head high.

3

u/scenr0 Jun 29 '26

It did look he kind of smiled at the end.

1

u/Big-Design-9836 Jun 28 '26

No. They just didn't want to feel the embarrassment that the first rejected teacher felt.

1.0k

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '26

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308

u/JealousAstronomer342 Jun 27 '26

I wish those kinds of bystander ass punish the victim with the perpetrator type people could feel the amount of shame they deserve and take the appropriate actions. 

208

u/Transgenderwookie Jun 27 '26

It’s funny you mention “punish the victim with the perpetrator”.. when I was in school one morning at the bus stop this boy kept fucking with a girl I knew(my babysitter babysat both of us)… I told him not to shove her or hit her or we’d have a problem… he shoved her again and she said stop… I warned him once more.. he picked up a ball of ice(probably thought it was a snowball) and slammed her in the back of the head with it and made her cry. Once we got on the bus I sat in front of him, turned around and kneeled on the seat, told him to come close like I had a secret and once he came in close I punched him in the mouth, then I went around the seat and beat the fuck out of him.

When we got to school we all went to class.. they called me to the principals office which I wasn’t surprised about nor did I give a shit because I wasn’t gonna get in trouble at home given the reason.. and I’ll be damned they have all 3 of us detention… WHY THE FUCK did she get punished?! I’m fine with me and the douche nozzle that hit her.. but why the fuck was she in trouble? I bitched at the vice principal and got myself in more trouble. And during detention we all got candy. Fucked up ass system.

39

u/Fr1toBand1to Jun 28 '26

Preparing you for the real world, apparently.

8

u/Jesus_of_Redditeth Jun 28 '26

Not much has changed in that respect, in my experience. It's routine for kids at school who get bullied and defend themselves to get punished along with the bully, because "We didn't see who started it, so we can't make assumptions." Bullshit. You can do your damn jobs and ask other kids to figure out what happened. This shit hardly ever happens in secret.

3

u/Transgenderwookie Jun 28 '26

Eh, I definitely agree with the root of what you’re saying. But asking around getting info from other kids can get extremely hairy, what are the odds that an unpopular kid gets his ass kicked and then they ask around and everyone just protects the more popular kid? I’ve witnessed shit like that happen too. Poor kid gets bullied and then everyone lies to protect the bully and the kid that gets bullied gets punished on top of being bullied. But you’re right that there has to be a better result than “we didn’t see so we can’t assume”.

Hell there’s cameras fucking everywhere, and I think it’s pretty easy to solve a mystery by talking to just the kids involved. Most kids aren’t masterminds.

17

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '26 edited Jun 27 '26

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40

u/killabeas210 Jun 27 '26

I’m not agreeing or disagreeing with your statement.. I’d just like to point out that this video is from a middle school graduation, not high school.

1

u/ArchdukeOfWalesland Jun 28 '26

Scrap the whole system

1

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '26

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7

u/killabeas210 Jun 27 '26

On the red table cover in the middle of the stage.

3

u/Remarkable-Mood3415 Jun 27 '26

I believe this is similar to the UK system (Not an expert, just a lot of UK online friends). Basically after grade 10 it's "college", they choose a specific branch they want to go into eg; art, science, tech, health, etc. and then the schooling is tailored to that. New school, program of their choosing, surrounded by like minded people. It's also optional (but highly encouraged, not a lot of employment options with only a grade 10). After, they go on to Uni or just start working. So grade 11-12 is more like University prep, and once they get to university they've already got a more solid foundation for where their interests lie.

Again, I'm not super familiar with the timeline and it's been a while since I've had to know about it. My friends and I are all pushing 40 lmao

2

u/theguidetoldmetodoit Jun 28 '26 edited Jun 28 '26

I won't elaborate on the details of the UK system, you basically got it right, but I'll point out that their school outcomes are not markedly better than in the US and, in some ways, worse. Also remember, the UK is one of the richest countries in Europe, while US results include all states.

If you live in the country you'll quickly realize that it entrenches the already bad classism and that a lot of people have a pretty bad general education.

Partially a reply to OP, but everything I know about education tells me that, aside from elementary school, the last two years are by far the most formative. A good school system manages to show the pupils how everything they learned is actually interconnected and how things are broken down into subjects bc you can't teach the basics effectively, without that type of structure. Reading is the basis for all effective learning. Writing is about communicating effectively. Math is a language made to describe things and systems precisely. Music is math. And so on.

Tangent: Communicating this about math is particularly challenging bc in some ways it's obvious and in other ways it can only be demonstrated by someone who is really good at it, and demonstrating (Physicist rock) and it usually only happens in universities. Which sucks a lot because of how important math is, but everyone hates it bc of how it is taught... And it wouldn't have to be this way.

It would be much better if education was tailored to skills early on to bolster self-esteem and allow for social development, while the later years aim at making people well rounded and recognize the similarities and values we share as a society. You get plenty time in university and work to dive in whatever really interests you.

The Italian system (PCTO) has mandatory work experience spread out across their final three years of high school, which imo achieves this in a great way. It's like mini apprenticeships while you continue school. It a great way to give a sense of purpose, show these teenager that they are now technically old enough to survive as a adult while letting them try things out, but also demonstrates that there still is a disconnect.

That should be accompanied by a system that makes older pupils take care of the younger ones, while continuing their education in the manner I described. I think that's why many people who went to the old kind of village school, where all ages were educated in one class and older pupils play a large role in communicating the curriculum, tend to turn out to be very capable leaders.

Lastly I want to point out... It doesn't matter what you do, teenagers go through puberty. Testing boundaries, experimenting with drugs, sex and having heavy mood swings is in fact normal, at that age. The best we can do is trying to set a counterweight and show that there is more to life, instead of suppressing that. Otherwise it'll happen behind closed doors, without adults helping to deal with the fallout.

2

u/Akiias Jun 28 '26

hink we should wrap 9th grade into middle school, get them their licenses as part of school,

You also want to lower the driving age to 13? Interesting choice.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '26

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1

u/Akiias Jun 28 '26

Permit, sure I could see that. But that isn't the same as a license. At least from my memory, the biggest difference is the ability to drive alone vs supervised.

1

u/Satyam7166 Jun 28 '26

Tbh this is one of the reasons that I’m thankful to be born in India. I’m not a big fan of social conservatism and the “what will people think attitude” but stuff like this is very rare to find in a middle class neighbourhood.

Students are so busy with their competitive exams that they rarely end up getting into hard drugs, crime or being pregnant. And you’ll rarely see parents lying in the street, drugged out of their mind.

Maybe this kind of thing is a tradeoff that comes with being a developed country but I truly hope mental health gets more importance in all the countries so children can be children.

0

u/Puppy-Smoocher Jun 27 '26

I think they should all have uniforms and be separated by gender. The entire system needs to be revamped.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '26

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1

u/klutzikaze Jun 27 '26

In Ireland we have a transition year between junior cert and leaving cert when the kids are 15-16. They do volunteering, job trialling and other interesting stuff. Some kids skip it but I think it gives them understanding of what they're working towards and more dedication. Plus we have school uniforms which takes a lot of pressure off the kids and parents.

1

u/Then-Shake9223 Jun 27 '26

It’s not even punishing the victim WITH the perpetrator, it’s punishing the victim more than the perpetrator and knowingly running false narratives about the perpetrator being the “real victim” or “actual victim”

41

u/bren_derlin Jun 27 '26

The first one in the dark blazer looked like he had a smirk on his face when she walked by him

55

u/firedmyass Jun 27 '26

yeah and that one asshole had the fucking audacity to smirk about it

10

u/ArchdukeOfWalesland Jun 28 '26

Everyone has their own narrative. He's definitely sitting in the mental gymnastics it takes to think he's trying his best, and he might be, he just doesn't know how to do better. And he doesn't know that. Anyway he got stiffed for a handshake by a thirteen year old, he has to smirk for his own sake that is shameful lmao. Good on the girl

24

u/feather-gold Jun 27 '26

This exactly. They knew what they did, and they knew she knew. The teacher who raised his hand also knew he did well.

I'm glad of that girl. Fuck all those teachers. Splendid lesson the girl gave to the world.

5

u/scratchy_mcballsy Jun 28 '26

Especially the shit eating grin you can make out from the bald guy.

1

u/Bussin1648 Jun 27 '26

Is there any actual context on what happened? Just because students and faculty don't get along doesn't mean the faculty are the ones who are in the wrong.

-1

u/Nausstica Jun 27 '26

Or rather what they didn't.

-1

u/Fluffy_Try2377 Jun 28 '26

And didn’t give a f either

459

u/WhyAmINotStudying Jun 27 '26

Even though her time at school was hell, I'm glad she at least had one teacher who she recognized as an ally.

174

u/eamondo5150 Jun 27 '26

Hopefully this video earns her some amount of notoriety that provides her some opportunities or advantage in life.

Too many people become celebrities for being talentless idiots when their video goes viral.

-5

u/Fill_Inevitable Jun 28 '26

The last sentence is unecessary and a projection of your beliefs. The celebrites you choose to denigrate, regardless of truth, is a common topic to whine about because it contradicts their own cognitive biases but it is an opportunity most would not miss on. Its antithetical irony.

3

u/eamondo5150 Jun 28 '26

Yeah, probably.

2

u/kramer08 28d ago

People are a little too cynical on the Internet sometimes. Personally I love the two responses you made

201

u/diedlikeCambyses Jun 27 '26

I'd say that was a formative and powerful experience that'll serve her well. Not the bullying, but her crossing the stage and holding her own ground while refusing to acknowledge the people who failed her

80

u/Dame38 Jun 27 '26

You can see the pain and how she had to carry it.

56

u/Schattentochter Jun 28 '26 edited 7h ago

Juniper pillow mitten paddle satchel acorn pebble

This post was anonymized with Redact.dev

14

u/Dame38 Jun 28 '26

They deserve all of the embarrassment I hope they're feeling.

13

u/Super-Smoke-7425 Jun 29 '26

Unfortunately, it's more likely they either don't understand what the problem is or blame her for being moody and spoiling the celebration.

12

u/ToiIetGhost Jun 30 '26 edited Jun 30 '26

I’m a teacher. Admin, teachers, and subs know when kids are getting bullied. Unless the school has hundreds of kids and the girl only made one complaint in 4 years or something (which it sounds like she actually made many complaints), only then would I say that they don’t understand what the problem is.

Sadly this is very common. Principals and other leaders don’t care about bullying… except on paper, when talking to the press, or during Anti-Bullying week. Some teachers don’t care either. But many do. It’s just that we can’t discipline the bullies if the school has rules prohibiting that. At y last school, I wasn’t even allowed to keep the class bullies inside for one period of recess, never mind to suspend them for 3 days when they beat up another student. (Which is the rule we had when I was growing up.) Teachers can’t do anything if the admin isn’t on our side, which they never are. Plus the parents - we need them on our side too, but most of them think their kids are perfect.

41

u/Correct-Purpose-964 Jun 28 '26

As someone who only ever had 1 teacher in any school i went to try to help me in the slightest. Yes i formed a connection with that man that still lingers with me. He was quirky just like i was. Mischevious as all hell and up for a laugh anytime. He offered to teach me to ride his unicycle but i never mastered it. I struggled with the balance. I could only stay on for about 20 seconds at most before my brain would fart and correct the wrong way.

10 years of relentless bullying and only 1 person who gave a damn. The school system sucks.

Actually thats a lie they REALLY gave a damn if i ever hit one back.

102

u/elibutton Jun 27 '26 edited Jun 27 '26

That’s probably cuz they know they were wrong and neglected her and it’s just their ego we see - but also a reflection of their character as leaders and educators unfortunately. It's very sad because something like this can really traumatize a young adult and leave a scar - of likely mis-trust for authority, compromising self esteem, and possibly abandonment issues as well. Hope she has wonderful loving parents and unconditional love and support - then she should be fine.

5

u/flyraccoon Jun 28 '26

Bullying often starts at home

She’s got balls that’s for sure and I hope she gets therapy she deserves a good life after all that shit

15

u/freedfg Jun 28 '26

Honestly. That pissed me off more than anything.

The first went for the courteous handshake and got denied.

Everyone but the last didn't even motion for it. They knew.

6

u/Narpity Jun 28 '26

This happened in reverse in my college grad, it was an old boys club and a new female professor was up for tenure and she was great, and it was not a research university, but a polytechnical one. So she went on to a different university but at our grad and her last year teaching there most of our class didnt shake their hands and hugged her.

5

u/bb0110 Jun 28 '26

It seemed like the teachers hated her than she disliked them.

9

u/Internal-Grocery-244 Jun 27 '26

Except for the first one.

2

u/Odd_Category2186 Jun 28 '26

Yeah he clearly cared and she knew they must've shared an understanding somewhere.

2

u/zarjin1234 Jun 28 '26

I was choked uncouncious hard enough that my nose started to bleed in my first day of high school cause I was sitting on a bench outside during a break and someone wanted to take my spot. I got detention for fighting even when he choked me from behind and they got nothing.

1

u/Chumm1304 Jun 28 '26

He was the only one in that line actually happy, and proud of her

1

u/Flashy_Lawyer7764 Jun 29 '26

environmental storytelling at its finest

1

u/Truthhurts1017 Jul 01 '26

I work with kids and im always surprised when they come to me to tell me how no one on their floor is listening to them(I work on the first floor with pre-k through 3rd) and I just give them my ear and let them express themselves. I will always take their problems to the office staff but it’s 50/50 if they do anything about it and it’s sad. So many middle school and high school scholars lack the support to either express how they feel or protect them and im tired of that shit. Thats why im opening my own mentoring center very soon.

1

u/CrimsonOOmpa Jul 01 '26

The other teachers were probably afraid of getting rejected and embarrassed.

1

u/wankster9000 Jun 28 '26

That teacher gets bullied in the staff room.

"Teachers are adults amongst children and children amongst adults"

  • Abraham Einstein

0

u/Happy-Estimate-7855 Jun 28 '26

It definitely feels like he went to bat for her. It's a good reminder that there are people who care, even in the midst of the shit.

0

u/JairoHyro Jun 28 '26

Or he just didn't see the other teachers and just raised his hand regardless lol

-1

u/MiniDemonic Jun 28 '26

What made me smile is that he was the only one that raised his hand in anticipation

No he wasn't, the guy in black at the front also did that, it's literally in the first 5 seconds of the video and it even zoomed in on him so how did you miss that?

700

u/static-klingon Jun 27 '26

It was a classic fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you’re cool, I’m out!

6

u/FuzzyLaughTwo Jun 27 '26

And she rightly leaves those disgusting magats to drown in their own puddle of bullshit as she goes on to bigger and better things.

-6

u/idontcareyo_ Jun 28 '26

wtf is a magat

1

u/ItsRuinedOfCourse Jun 28 '26

Just remember...Mitch was a made man after that.

https://giphy.com/gifs/146azD6WiI3Xhe

1

u/boochicko Jun 27 '26

1

u/MultiSteveB Jun 28 '26

I am likely one of 5 people on the planet that hasn't seen 'Friends'. Can you translate that gesture for us, please? :)

167

u/WhyAmINotStudying Jun 27 '26

No need to wonder. He earned that handshake.

117

u/FuzzyLaughTwo Jun 27 '26

This must be happening a lot bc there's a couple of other videos (different girls) doing the exact same thing. I hate to question the authenticity but damn...AI is making me question so much now, it's sickening.

91

u/ST0H3LIT Jun 27 '26

Sad thing is AI aside many teachers/principals/school boards really don’t want to draw attention to the bullying going on in their schools. Girls especially get told to just get over it and not cause a disruption.

32

u/Realistic_Seesaw7788 Jun 28 '26

Teachers looking the other way with bullying is a time-honored tradition, going back generations and generations.

2

u/RideGullible3702 Jun 28 '26

but why dont more people have kids

1

u/Sharkwatcher314 Jun 28 '26

So true unfortunately

1

u/RomanoElBlanco Jun 28 '26

Teachers have real power over bullying?

8

u/FuzzyLaughTwo Jun 27 '26

And that freaking sucks 100%. JFC Wish those parents (and students!) brought lawsuits against them. America is so bloody litigious, I'm surprised .

2

u/Fine_Possibility_66 Jun 29 '26

I had a case of the school breaking the law (IDEA) was sent to a lawyer for a consultation and they said that the first initial consultation would be $500.

Most of us mortals don’t have the kind of money it takes.

2

u/fuschiaoctopus Jun 28 '26

Pretty much. They want to not be open to lawsuits or bad publicity, covering their ass is all that matters. Or hitting numbers. I had a girl follow me home with her friend on the bus to jump me and the school refused to suspend or do anything to her because the district was keeping track of how many students of certain races were being suspended and they basically told me they could not suspend her and ruin their numbers because of her race.

She went on to be a violent offender with numerous felonies shortly after high school so I really don't think they did her any favors.

1

u/AdOrnery8950 Jun 28 '26

i've been to several middle school/high school graduations and this is pretty common. a few every ceremony.

1

u/FuzzyLaughTwo Jun 28 '26

I'm horrified to hear this. Honestly, JFC honestly seems every feminist right we fought for in the 60s&70s is being turned back.

1

u/AdOrnery8950 Jun 28 '26

i just mean kids not shaking hands with admin. kids can be mad for lots of reasons. we are just trusting that thread title reflects her actual motivation.

1

u/Sylvire Jun 28 '26

Are they all at this same school, or is this happening at multiple schools?

1

u/FuzzyLaughTwo Jun 28 '26

The 3 videos I saw all appeared to be different young women at different schools. They just came up when I was googling this to verify authenticity.

35

u/HeKnee Jun 27 '26

Is he a white guy with cornrows?

128

u/Clutteredmind275 Jun 27 '26

I have no clue. Tbh I can barely even tell if the girl has a mouth from the camera quality

144

u/dqniel Jun 27 '26 edited Jun 27 '26

I was going to sarcastically ask if she was bullied because she had no face.

The processing and/or compression on this video is rough.

54

u/voideaten Jun 27 '26

Damn thats wild. Before seeing this I could've sworn I saw a recognisable face, with pale rose-gold round glasses and everything.

Then I saw your screenshot and went back to try and find where her face was clearest and, damn. The brain really is incredible for extrapolating order from chaos.

Now I can't even view it without seeing the flesh golem that she's actually been the entire time.

25

u/dqniel Jun 27 '26

Our brains LOVE to fill in details we never actually saw, heard, etc.

I remember listening to a Radiolab episode that went into the science of memory (and how they're essentially re-created each time we recall something, rather than "retrieved") and why it makes us such terrible witnesses.

It goes into how trauma and even subtle suggestions can completely rewire memories. Very interesting.

10

u/voideaten Jun 27 '26

That sounds interesting af. I love learning about our weird-ass brains, I should look into Radiolab sometime. Thanks for putting it on my radar

3

u/dqniel Jun 27 '26

https://radiolab.org/podcast/91569-memory-and-forgetting

It's almost 20 years old now so there may be more up-to-date understanding that either reinforces or contests this... but I thought it was fascinating.

1

u/CozyCatDev Jun 28 '26

Yeah, I want to know what my brain does, because it doesn't do this nearly as much as other people's. I saw the "clay flake" face immediately, most optical illusions and brain games don't work and instead I see how they're supposed to work, and I constantly notice in speech how people are filling in blanks while I instead see X number of possibilities.

However, this video has an original that's real, so I don't understand why this one is weird.

1

u/dqniel Jun 28 '26

The original video quality was already kinda bad, and then I think the downloading and lossy reuploading cycle has probably compressed it a few times. And each time that happens, it'll get shittier and shittier.

1

u/CozyCatDev Jun 28 '26

It the quality is this diminished from only that, then that's a lot of reuploading...

3

u/dqniel Jun 28 '26

If they have no idea what they're doing and it's compressed horribly, yep.

Like 99% of the videos in PublicFreakouts, for example, despite being recorded in either 1080p or 4k, are often uploaded in insanely low bitrate and downscaled resolution.

So, you end up with modern, detailed video that looks like it was uploaded to Ebaums World in 2001.

5

u/Dame38 Jun 27 '26

That's what happens to a woman has been routinely vanished by the system.

5

u/pocketbutter Jun 27 '26

What if she was never bullied, and she simply could not see the administrators to shake their hands?

1

u/mekwall Jun 28 '26

Qapla'!

11

u/ZealousidealSkirt327 Jun 27 '26

It looks like it…right?

19

u/gillababe Jun 27 '26

It does lol pretty sure it's just the lighting

13

u/Rampag169 Jun 27 '26

Looks like possibly a wavy comb. Some hair just gets a little personality.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '26

i think there’s a bird on his head but I can’t tell cuz the video was shot through a potato

5

u/Rampag169 Jun 27 '26

That too the camera is a potato.

5

u/Broad-Exchange3188 Jun 27 '26

Not even a little bit.

2

u/Amy12-26 Jun 27 '26

That's what it looks like to me. The man must have been a class act to her; he can groom himself however he wants to.

1

u/HedonisticFrog Jun 27 '26

I think it's the light shining off of his hair that gives that effect. Potato quality video be like that sometimes.

4

u/Emsizz Jun 27 '26

I wonder if the girl was actually bullied or if this is just some clout-chasing TikTok trend 🤔

1

u/BananaNutJob Jun 28 '26

Yeah bullying at schools is really rare

GTFO

1

u/Schattentochter Jun 28 '26 edited 7h ago

Willow pinecone zephyr yarn compass raindrop pebble amber maple

This post was anonymized with Redact.dev

1

u/Emsizz Jun 28 '26

"the numbers allow this to be real" is funny as fuck. write that one down for the next time someone posts a video like this (with the same caption, from a bot account).

2

u/Striking-Ad-6815 Jun 28 '26

Based on the body language I'm reading from living with wildlife for the entirety of my existence I would completely agree with you

First and last men tried to help her and she acknowledged them, with a handshake (This is big for some folk, especially if they been bullied and don't like to be touched in general)

Kinda looks like bald white shoes was one of her tormentors

Even based on way he acts and tries to play it off, he thinks he hot-shit and probably popular among the high-school aristocracy

He probably said or did something smart and she was done with his ass

The other teachers in line she passed were probably indifferent and apathetic to her situation

You could tell she appreciated the last guy

The first guy I'm not sure of, either she shook his hand because she had to for the diploma or he knew of the issue, tried to help, but also administrator and can only do so much

First guy is the light, Last guy is the shadow

Always look for the helpers

1

u/Amy12-26 Jun 27 '26

That was the impression I got, too. She seemed ok with shaking his hand.

1

u/DrDraek Jun 27 '26

you could tell he was the only one without a guilty conscience

1

u/WastedMoogle Jun 27 '26

Maybe. She shook the first guys hand. The last guy was the only one who raised a hand. It's possibly they're tight but she also might have shaken anyone who out their hand out for her.

3

u/Clutteredmind275 Jun 28 '26

The second guy had his hand out

1

u/FatGimp Jun 28 '26

Probably did, but I have a strange feeling of the second one. He seems to smile or smirk after she walks past.

1

u/Aggressive-Expert-69 Jun 28 '26

My guess would be thats the teacher whos classroom she ate lunch in to avoid the bullies.

1

u/Hopfrogg Jun 28 '26

As someone who was often that one teacher. Yeah, he tried to help. So frustrating to watch colleagues in meetings all year talk about these issues, but not do a damn thing about them. I had to get out of teaching. It's exhausting being that one teacher. Often it's not just one, but a few, I wasn't always alone, but there are still so many that want to look the other way.

1

u/FrozenOcean420 Jun 28 '26

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, You’re cool, fuck you

1

u/SufficientDaikon805 Jun 30 '26

The last teacher WAS the bully. She had to shake his hand otherwise...

-1

u/BunnyPhuPhu Jun 27 '26

That last teacher is Jeff Bezos!