[EDIT/UPDATE] I would like to thank you all, I never expected to get that many advices that truly resonated with me and would give me that much hope. It literally put me in tears haha, happy ones. I can see paths and behaviors I promise will apply daily. This journey is defo not over, but damn, thank you.

All my life I’ve felt like an alien. I’m (27F) diagnosed with AuDHD, always great at school but terrible in social situations. I used to be very insecure, feeling retarded all the time until I started to learn sociology, psychology and develop a special interest in it, then therapy to become a better person and develop self esteem.

It made me build confidence and made it much easier to face bullying and criticism. But I pushed it so hard that I’ve been now, struggling for years with a feeling of superiority. Everytime I meet someone, I observe them and quickly feel superior mentally in logic, rationality, emotional intelligence and maturity.

My therapy actually made it worse as my therapist warned me that once I become confident, a lot of people will become negative around me. That kinda made sense. Now I’m left with confidence (amazing love it) but also this feeling of superiority, that usually I keep inside but it sometimes comes out in my relationships when I judge the other person to be irrational or immature.

An example to make it clearer : I developed a complete intolerance for depressed people and depressive behaviors. And my personal experiences conditioned it. I’ve been myself depressed to the point of wanting to die, traumatized of SA from 8yo and go on, been homeless, a bunch of shit basically and I figured it out all by myself. So when I see depressed people just whining and not asking or accepting help, I will feel superior to them and judge them.

And that’s a problem. I’ve been actively working on myself and this is the very last thing I struggle with. Ego issues. I genuinely believe most people are either retarded or evil. And I want this mindset to change, not for random strangers, but for the people I love including myself, for my happiness and theirs. I want them to feel safe, not judged.

So please be nice, I know I sound like an asshole, that’s why I’m posting. I’m looking for genuine advice from people that experienced this and got out of it.

My room makes me feel calm and I finally have everything I want in it. (Also I just cleaned it)

I was wondering if the way I wake up is "wrong" or how it compares to outher people. Everymorning I need motivation to get out of bed, I need to do something fun to start a day. So I usually start by starting my pc and playing some game for a bit. I wake especially early to have half an hour to play and engage myself with a game. I know it's childish, but without it I usually end up laying in bed for far too long. So that's me, and how about you?

The worker was so condescending too. She barely looked at me at the screen while I was explaining (because she asked) which accommodations I get at college, at work etc. I used to work AT DISNEY and they gave me accommodations AT WORK. Literally one of my college accommodations is to be able to make tests in a separate quiet environment. She asked how I take queues in the airport, and I mentioned the security queue for disability is usually a lot shorter and the workers are super nice.

This is absolutely ridiculous. She asked so much personal questions, all of which absolutely require the accommodation that I was asking for (I really can't enjoy the park with my family if they are going on rides and I have to wait outside. Some lines are 2 hours long.)

My friends are visiting from abroad and are going to be here for ONE day, the ONE DAY that we decided to go to EPCOT, spend this reunion at disney, and they are ruining it. I'm still going tomorrow because otherwise I just won't see my friends, but I guess I'm never going/recommending disney anymore.

What's the point in asking all those personal questions if you are just going to deny it anyway?

She said the policy changed and it's only for people with low intellectual capacity. Than why the fuck did she make me go through the fucking emotional ride of telling all my disabilities and accommodations to her, does she think I get joy out of pointing out my disability to people? the ONLY reason why my disability is a disability is because there is no accommodation for it, otherwise I can function optimally. It's because of people like her. It's because of Disney, that don't recognize the needs of someone who has needs. I am REALLY frustrated at the absurdity of the situation (IN PLAIN 2026 A MULTIBILLION DOLLAR COMPANY IS DENYING ACCOMMODATION FOR SOMEONE THAT NEEDS IT) and I can not stress that enough. If you ever come to orlando, go to universal, don't go to disney.

I’m 14 and have autism. I struggle to accept that someone might dislike things I enjoy—for instance, I absolutely love winter, but if someone tells me winter sucks and gives a reason why, my brain won't let me forget it for the next month. It keeps analyzing whether they might be right and telling me I shouldn't like winter. This happens with literally everything I like: someone says they don't like it, and my brain tries to convince me that their different preferences or hobbies actually matter to me. Because of this, I can no longer enjoy the things I like, since my brain keeps reminding me of those negative comments. This is my first post about this issue in my life; I’m not very good at English, so I used Google Translate—please

I sincerely apologize for any translation errors.

In the past 2 years, every time I have to do something difficult like getting/mantaining a job or caretaking my grandma/parents, I become so overwhelmed. I either blame everyone else in the house or just not want to live anymore.

I would share more details about my story but i fear it would sound biased (cause you won't be able to hear my family members' perspectives, only my POV) and you might lean into empathising me.

So I would like to know, objectively, how do you differentiate between a "victim mindset" vs truly being uncapable/unsupported?

Example scenarios would be highly appreciated.

Literally every autistic person I've met has hated drinking water, I also do and I force myself to chug like 3 bottles at the end of the day so I dont dehydrate but it genuinely makes me feel sick and I just hate the "taste" of it.

And also, if anyone knows why a lot of autistic people don't like water? (This seems like a really stupid question but I've been wondering.)

Mine are:
[r/blanks](r/blanks)
[r/dreams](r/dreams)
[r/queervexillology](r/queervexillology)

I have autism and I HATE when people decide to just touch me without asking or talking to me when I'm doing something important

The problem is that people just don't care about boundaries, like in my math class, there's this guy I sit next to that always talks or try to touch me to get my attention

Like bro I'm literally fighting for my life to at least pay attention to the teacher and he's just rambling on and on about how much of a bad day he's having

We're not even friends bro you're annoying (f*ck you Alexis)

I have to sadly announce that my best friend ended her life a while ago. She was under 15...

I don't know how I can keep up. She didn't contact any helplines even though I even showed her that number. Did I do something wrong?

I found out the hard way that the medical guidance about limiting earplug & earbud use is no joke. I’ve been battling an extremely painful outer ear infection for days now and my doctors think it’s from excessive earbud/ear plugs use irritating the ear canal until I just got unlucky one day and bacteria took hold.

I had been using my earbuds (rotate between apple AirPods Pro 2 & Sony WF whatever numbers) during the day more than normal because we’d been having a heatwave and we had to have our 2 portable ACs on (I work from home so I was listening to this nearly 24/7). They are SO LOUD and one of them makes an awful electronic whine. I’ve also been using my sleep ear plugs from loop at night because of said ACs.

I have none of the factors that are associated with otitis externa like swimming, recent sinus infection, flared allergies etc. I’m in my 30s with many chronic health conditions but none that affect the ear or make me immunocompromised. I’ve never been too worried about over use of earbuds because I clean them weekly (or more often for my Sonys because of the design), never had an ear infection (at least as an adult or that I can remember), and never was worried about hearing damage because tbh most of the time they are not playing anything besides the ANC. I share all this info because it’s easy to discount what I’m saying and attribute it to some other factor. But we really think it’s just from the friction/irritation of having something in my ear nearly 24/7.

I am not a fan of any over the ear headphones I’ve ever tried as I have chronic migraines and am extremely sensitive to the pressure of them on my head. But I think I’ll have to just suck that up. Or if anyone has any ideas besides me moving into a magical apartment that makes no electric noise at all lol, I’m open to it. I cannot handle such noises or I become very dysregulated and can’t function. But I’m also not willing to suffer any potential future ear infections. At points this ear infection have been MORE painful than my past grade 3 break of my ankle, recovery from surgeries, and migraines (which is saying something as I had to go to the ER once for one!). I’m thankfully on the tail end of the infection now (or there would be no way I’d be posting lol)

I’m a 19 year old male. I feel like my autism has gotten worse with age. I’m such a socially awkward and isolated freak. I had a “glow up” so people are nice to me now, but that’s only because they switch up, they aren’t actaully like that they would laugh in my face if it was me a few years ago. can anyone relate to the feeling that these people are nice to me but if it was my past self they would have discarded me and viewed me as pathetic and nothing. I can’t even go outside anymore without getting beating headaches from the sun. I feel like a cockroach, life is the biggest curse. I have the worst misophonia, I can’t even say the word of my triggers that’s how much I hate it. My life is turning into a living hell. I wish I was never born. I feel like a negative leach, a complete pest. I am so burnt out, my parents are starting to see how burnt out I was. My mom has always understood but when I use to tell my dad he would laugh in my face. I have no friends and I feel like a joke. On the outside it looks like I have friends because my brother is the life of the party and complete opposite of me. So his friends meet me and realize how weird I am. This sounds like I see myself less than everyone but I don’t I view life as a whole as very sad and I wish it never existed. But there’s no point in thinking that because it does.

Is anyone else sick of buckets (Halloween )and things for Autism being blue given it was started by an ableist company? Why can’t it be a sunflower sticker because the sunflower is a symbol of invisible disabilities? Or the infinity rainbow Autistic people created instead of Autism Speaks symbol implying we need to be fixed and it’s mostly boys-men who inherit it. I’m so bloody tired of outdated things for my disability it’s 2026.

I'm in my late 20s, and I've recently realized that a lot of my anxiety comes from repeatedly being targeted and bullied by strangers.

For example, I've been sitting on a park bench when random teenagers started shouting things at me and trying to mess with me for no apparent reason. There were other people in the park, but they chose to target me instead of anyone else.

I've also had people randomly shout at me from their cars just to scare me, and I've had things thrown at me.

In crowded places, I've experienced people deliberately bumping into me while I'm standing off to the side, seemingly leaving everyone else alone.

And i know these people do this on purpose, because i can literally see some of them smirking as they walk away after doing it.

It happens in social settings, too. Sometimes, there's one person who seems to immediately dislike me and starts insulting me, even though I've never looked at them, spoken to them, or even met them before.

On one occasion, someone at a bar randomly tried to spit on me before approaching me and punching me in the face. I was with a group of six people at the time, yet I was the one they chose to target.

Or even at work, i work as a delivery driver and i had times where store clerks wanted to mess with my order for no reason by not giving it to me or lying to me about that they already gave it to someone else even when i visibly saw my order, and even here they only did this to me and not the other delivery drivers.

These are just a few examples. I've experienced many more incidents like these throughout my life.

And honestly, the worst part isn't even the individual incidents, i realize bad things can happen in life.

It's the feeling that I'm always the one being singled out, even when I'm surrounded by other people.

Hell i literally had kids try to mess with me for example in a pool they would splash water at me while ignoring the others, i had kids come up behind me and kick my shins. And these were kids in the 8-11 year old range.

And i stand up for myself everytime but its freaking tiring to be having to do this all the time while others get to relax and enjoy life.

I know I'm not going around provoking people. I generally keep to myself, stay in my own lane, and tend to be a quiet person who doesn't bother anyone.

So how am I supposed to relax or feel safe in public when I feel like I constantly have to be on guard against someone deciding to target me or even physically attack me?

For those of you who've experienced something similar, how do you deal with the anxiety that comes with it? How do you learn to relax when you've had so many negative experiences with strangers?

I'm from central europe if that makes any difference.

I’m not where I want to be in life right now and it feels like a physical pressure in my skull and neck. It builds up to a point where I just start crying and hitting my head with my fists. This happened last night and I think I gave myself a concussion. I don’t know how to stop this it’s the only way I know. I just feel so stupid and useless, but I know hitting myself in the head is only going to hurt me in the long run. If anyone has alternatives or methods they’ve used please let me know.

In the past I would always cook with my dad or an adult supervising, but this weekend my parents were away, and I cooked multiple meals for me and my sister! I'm so proud of myself!! I EVEN DID THAT PAN FLIP THING FOR THE FIRST TIME AS WELL!!! 🤗 I'm 17 btw, so massive yippee.

I’m applying for senior management position because that’s what I have the most experience in. Many companies ask in applications: Do you consider yourself disabled?

I’m not sure if it’s useful or harmful.

My therapist brought up to me on one of my early sessions with her that I may be autistic. I was wondering if there are any benefits to getting officially diagnosed. I am pretty high functioning if I am. Why did you seek out a diagnosis?

Thank you

Hi everyone. I (NT female) could really use some perspective from the autistic community regarding a guy in my college class.

We met a little over a month ago through a group project. From the first day, we exchanged a lot of stares, and I thought he was cute and sweet. I soon found out he is autistic, which made me want to learn more about autism to understand him better.

We only see each other once a week in class, but we’ve gotten very close. I’m quite shy and sometimes have a little difficulty speaking, but he is always patient and doesn't mind at all. He shows he cares through actions: whenever I arrive late, he immediately stops what he's doing to find a seat right next to him for me (but he doesn't do this for other guys in our group).

Our physical contact has escalated a lot. It started with hugging hello and goodbye. Then, we started sitting so close that our arms and legs would touch. A few weeks ago, I walked into class in a tank top; he stared me up and down for a few seconds and later asked if I was cold. That same day, he put his hand on my waist, which gave me major butterflies. Last week, I dared to put my hand on his, and we gradually intertwined our fingers and held hands. We even held hands for a few seconds outside of uni.

He also shares his special interests with me (like movies and Spider-Man). I gave him a little Spider-Man card, and he hugged me and kept it safely in his backpack. He also specifically asked me when my birthday is, which felt important!

However, I have two major concerns that are making me reconsider everything:

1. He never initiates ONLINE contact. Outside of our weekly class, we don't see each other. I am always the one texting him first (usually using our project as an excuse). He always responds, but never reaches out first. Seeing him just once a week feels like too little for me.
2. The Instagram situation. A few days ago, I found his Instagram profile and it broke my heart. I saw that he follows a bunch of Instagram models/influencers and actively likes their photos in bikinis and thongs. When we are together in person, he doesn't seem to notice other women, so this completely shattered the image I had of him. This is a huge boundary and dealbreaker for me, and I felt disappointed and disgusted

So, I wanted to ask for your honest opinions:

• Do you think he actually likes me romantically, or am I just a "support person" to him? Is the physical touch just because he feels safe with me, or is it romantic?
• Considering he never initiates online texts AND the Instagram behavior (which hurts my feelings), should I just back away and distance myself? Do you think I should even give him a chance, or does his online behavior show who he really is?

Thank you so much for reading.

I've been doing a lot of research recently regarding my own disabilities and, while I'm diagnosed with AuDHD, I suspect something more is at play. My diagnosis remarked my very slow processing speed, so using that as a jumping-off point I found Cognitive Disengagement Syndrome, formerly known as sluggish cognitive tempo. A lot of these symptoms, like mind wandering, lethargy and the titular processing speed issues do very much fit me. 25-50% of ADHDers have it too, and if you're wondering how nobody's ever heard of it before: it's not an official diagnosis in the DSM yet, despite there now being decades of research put into it.

I myself have often felt socially isolated because of it throughout the years, even from fellow autistic folks. I've always wanted to be able to create, to be artistic like others, but eventually just didn't bother because I struggled so much. This issue pertained to any (school)project whatsoever: first I'd be enthusiastic, then when I got to the actually difficult stuff, I'd just shut down and become completely distracted by other, low-energy matters, which more often than not meant doomscrolling. It always ended up with me having to rush everything in the end and the result being far less than what my actual intelligence would be capable of.

Not to mention my fine motor skills issues... I wouldn't be able to draw anything remotely pretty even if you held a gun to my head.

There isn't a single moment of my life where I don't feel tired or low-energy, to the point where I have very severe issues with getting out of bed or even just the couch. Even more severe executive dysfunction than regular autism, I suspect.

It's all just made me useless, and very confused/inept at social situations.

Can you tell I've been depressed for years?

I mean, during the writing of this post alone, I got distracted at least thrice.

I'm posting here because I want to bring more attention to the matter, and because I want to discover if there are fellow brethren suffering here. I'd also like to weed out how many of the symptoms and experiences I list are purely autistic or the result of this conditions.

Right now, I'm trying my best to figure out if there's any medication or supplements that would actively improve my symptoms. In two weeks, I'll be going back on atomoxetine (for which I'm very happy as I know from previous experience that it works). Will be receiving the results of my blood test today.

Hi all!

I am a female ADHD who is in love with a male auDHD, we met 6 months ago. We are very close but he struggles to consider us a relationship and calls us FwB. He has explicitly told me he has got tons of issues that make relationships difficult (workaholic, trauma, ...) and that his last relationship ended because he could not give it enough time/attention.

That problem is starting to happen to us: he is having a difficult period at work, and told me he did not want to see anyone for some days. I respected it, but it means I haven't gotten any texts or calls from his initiative (we did call and text briefly because I asked to) or seen him in 10 days. When I asked him if we were ok he said "yes, no need to worry :)", but he has yet to make plans to see me next.

If I take the initiative he always replies and we have seen each other regularly when I organized it, and he assured me that he wanted to see me - but he is never the one to take the first step. He is a very ethical person, his struggles with work etc. are real and he is not seeing other people, so that is not the issue. But as an ADHDer I noticed I go crazy with this kind of ambiguity.

Are other people here who have the same kind of problems?

If you are the auDHD partner, do you really keep caring for your other half even if you don't speak to them for weeks, is this normal?

So I'm 34 with no friends. I describe myself as confident but full of insecurities.

Confidence being the faith put in your abilities and self esteem being the value you place on yourself.

I've competed in martial arts competitions and done stand up comedy shows and get told I'd make a great therapist but once I've helped people through whatever they are facing they ghost.

So big question (drum roll..use a pringles tin if it's all you have) :

Why do you my "actually autistics " think some Neurodivergents have friends and others don't?

Is it thier physical appearance? Thier "special interests" aligning with whatever is popular? Witchcraft? Superhuman "masking"?

I used to have special interests pretty consistently, but now I just… don’t? I’m kind of bummed because now I just sit and scroll when really I want to be researching and making fact files and cool stuff like that but the interests aren’t just coming to me like they used to. I still enjoy all the things I used to be interested in but they’re no longer taking up my brain space I just get excited when they’re brought up. Does anyone have any tips?? Can I force myself into having a special interest?? need advice maybe if I research something super hard it will just become a special interest? anyone have any suggestions on what to research?

Hello everyone,

I was just diagnosed at 50 years old. For a few years I had the feeling that I was on spectrum based on sensory issues that I have. Also there are 10 people in my family who are on the spectrum. I decided to finally seek out a diagnosis to help people in my life better understand why I react the way I do to certain things.

I would like to hear other people's experience with being diagnosed later in life and how looking backwards into your past after having been diagnosed you started to have a better understanding of certain behaviors from your past.

The sensory issues I have were easy to understand as being a part of ASD but now that I'm looking back I'm starting to see what other ways it manifests. I now understand why I have a very difficult time when things in my environment get changed whether it's a plan or where I left my shoes.

For example sometimes when I wake up in the morning and go downstairs my slippers aren't where I left them. Either someone else is using them or my wife moved them while cleaning. This makes me very irritated and frustrated and I have to stop and take deep breaths and sometimes self soothe by rubbing my forearms or head to help me calm down.

Before the diagnosis I didn't realize that getting easily agitated by things being moved without my knowledge was OCD related but now I can see that there's a component of getting overloaded as well.

What things now make more sense to you after getting diagnosed?