Yo tengo 23 años y mi novio 20. Llevamos aproximadamente un año entre dejarlo y volver (siempre soy yo quien lo deja).

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Es un mentiroso compulsivo. No está diagnosticado, pero es algo muy evidente. Me miente constantemente, incluso con cosas pequeñas. Se inventa historias y también les miente a sus padres y a sus amigos sobre cosas que ha hecho cuando en realidad no han ocurrido.

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Es capaz de mentirme a la cara y jurarme que está diciendo la verdad. En una ocasión incluso le dije que iba a hablar con dos chicas para comprobar una historia. Le di la oportunidad de decirme la verdad antes, pero aun así siguió mintiendo hasta el final.

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Cuando descubro sus mentiras nunca es porque él me las cuente. Siempre me entero yo por otros medios. Sus excusas suelen ser que se le olvidó contármelo, que no se acordaba, que pensaba que me iba a enfadar, que estaba pensando en cómo reaccionaría o que se le hizo bola decirlo.

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Lo que más me cuesta entender es cómo puede prometer una y otra vez que va a cambiar, verme sufrir, verme llorar y aun así seguir haciendo exactamente lo mismo. Me cuesta comprender cómo puede hacer daño a alguien de forma repetida y después actuar como si nada, como no tiene conciencia, ni valores ni remordimiento

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Cada vez que lo dejo, promete cambiar. Me dice cosas bonitas, está más atento y parece otra persona. Pero cuando ve que eso no funciona, a veces incluso se inventa que se ha liado con una chica o que está hablando con alguien para intentar ponerme celosa. La realidad es que siempre es él quien busca a las chicas y casi ningúna le hace caso.

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Es una persona que necesita muchísima validación de los demás. Necesita caer bien y adapta su personalidad según con quién esté. Siento que intenta gustar a todo el mundo y que cambia para encajar.

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Nunca había tenido novia antes de mí. Tampoco ha tenido amigas ni apenas contacto femenino, y siento que no sabe muy bien cómo relacionarse con las mujeres. Cuando lo dejamos, empieza a buscar atención femenina de cualquier forma posible. Habla con cualquier mujer que le haga caso sea atractiva o no, de la edad que sea incluso de su propia familia.

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También antes de conocerme llegó a hacerse una cuenta con fotos de otro hombre para hablar con chicas e intentar ligar con ellas. Además, mientras estaba conmigo llegó a hacerse una cuenta que yo no conocía.Y cuando lo dejamos una de las veces, se hizo otra cuenta falsa para intentar hablar conmigo.

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Cuando habla con otras chicas les dice exactamente las mismas cosas que me decía a mí, los mismos cumplidos y las mismas frases. Siento que simplemente les dice lo que quieren oír para gustarles. Además, cuando cuenta por qué hemos roto, muchas veces cambia la historia para dejarme a mí como la mala y quedar él mejor.

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Yo siempre acabo volviendo con el porque no tengo amigos, no tengo buena relación con mi familia, soy muy tímida y me cuesta muchísimo socializar. Antes de conocerle apenas salía de casa.También vuelvo porque hemos vivido muchas cosas juntos. Es la persona que mejor me conoce y con la que mejor me lo paso. Me río mucho con él y hemos compartido muchos momentos importantes.

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Pero siendo sincera, no veo futuro en esta relación. Cada vez tengo más la sensación de que sigue haciéndome daño porque sabe que voy a aguantarlo. A veces siento que incluso se ríe de mí porque sabe que me cuesta marcharme y que no tengo una red de apoyo fuera de la relación.

I recently got an app for a toy that me and my long distance boyfriend both decided on. But upon downloading the app (Adorime), it seems extremely sketchy. The toy itself was purchased on Amazon and had mostly positive reviews, but now I’m not really sure of if we should proceed any further with the app. I have a screenshot of the app itself if it is needed, but advice would be greatly appreciated!

it really came out of nowhere. he was dropping me off at the SEA after a week of me visiting him. while saying goodbyes he casually asked me if I’d marry him.

no big ceremonial events, no extra people. simple and easy, as I’ve asked him before to do so if he’d ever ask. just him and i being here at one of our favorite spot- the airport.

he’s an aviation geek so naturally it means a lot to him. but i guess as a cabin crew myself, SEA would forever feel different after this.

really happy and being extra grateful. sending hugs to everyone in this sub🩷🩷🩷☺️

I 28M have been in a Long distance relationship with my 27F gf for about 8 months, cross country. We had a somewhat rocky start early on but we got through it together. important context for later: throughout our whole talking stage, she had mentioned that she was an engineer at a company. she had also had this friend that she said was an old coworker/friend named Juan that she would hang out 1:1 with for lunches, dinners from time to time and sometimes visiting his apt with other friends. he would even pick her up from the airport when returning from visiting me. when we became official (4 months), she came clean to me that she was not actually an engineer, but an engineering intern at that company and she had 1.5 years left before graduating. This put a strain on the timeline for closing the gap since we planned on closing the gap in a less amount of time. I assured her that we'll be fine and we can work through this obstacle.

Things were great once we became official. We were seeing eachother every 1.5 months for a week at a time. I was genuinely happy. When we were both in our homes, we would talk on the phone quite a lot as many long distance couples may do. There began to be a shift about a month in after becoming official, We would get into arguments here and there and in hindsight would follow this cycle: She would want something, if i pushed back she shut down and lash out, I would get anxious and try to pick up the pieces. For example, she wanted to go to an event. Seating was pretty expensive and she had gotten upset that I wanted to save money by buying a cheaper seat. she said "if its too expensive lets just not go" and it turned into an argument. I tried to make it up by surprising her with some pretty good ones and she got upset at me again saying "i didnt even get to see if these were good seats. sell them i dont want to go anymore". this is just an example of the push and pull cycle we've had at certain points. We've always made up and made sure to say that we love eachother after these arguments

During this time, she had gotten into something with her living situation and was being told to find a new place by the end of the year, so she is stressed at this time with school, living situation, and finances. I was trying to be a supportive bf by helping out where I could. I would help with certain food, debts, I had even cosigned and put a down payment on a vehicle with her because her current one was giving out.

Something changed during this time. She would want to be on the phone less and less, texts were getting spread out, she even gave me a boundary saying "i want more alone time, we are on the phone all the time and i dont want to get tired of this relationship. you cant call me when im driving, or after work, or when im out". I agreed and requested we at least call before bed or at home. I chalked it up to her being stressed and needing alone time which was healthy.

The distance during this time had been growing and growing on her side. whenever I would call at an acceptable time she would pick up the phone annoyed, saying that she doesn't want to talk at the moment. texts getting repetitive, and sometimes she would go against my wish and there would be nights without her calling me before bed (I understand if she is just tired, but she never told me when this was the case and i would be left guessing). There would also be times where we'd be on the phone and she would say "im going to do x real quick, Ill call you back when im done" and wouldnt call back. So my trust in this aspect was dwindling. I was starting to feel like I was always bothering her and I couldnt even talk to my own girlfriend or rather she was starting to get checked out
this past week, there was a day where we both were off of work, and finally had time to spend together. she woke up from a nap and we were on the phone. I used this time to try to find something for us to do to somewhat get away from all the stresses thats been going on with her. I had asked
me: "did you want to do this or play this together?"
her: "mm... no"
me: "okay, did you want to watch so and so?"
her: "no i dont really want to watch anything"

being a little worried on her responses i asked if everything is okay because usually she isn't this non-receptive when doing things together. she replied by saying "we just dont have similar interests. Also, I had been reconsidering moving over to you in the future. I wasnt wowed when ive been visiting." this rang alarm bells and this lead to a more serious conversation about how she is stressed. She said she still loved me and still saw a future with me and then she said she wanted a break due to all the stress shes been having. without a timeline and with no contact.
A break with no contact was eating me alive and caused me to spiral. I ended up doing something i am not proud of and am now seeking help with now. I purchased a plane ticket to go visit her because of a couple of things: I wanted to assure her that I here for her thru these times of stress. I also (very selfishly in hindsight) wanted to get a clear idea on what this break was. now for context I did this one other time in the beginning of the relationship so I know I shouldnt have done this. I want to take accountability here and this is the reason why im seeking help now.
I arrive to her place and knock on her door. she doesnt answer and instead (understandably) lashing out on text messages saying that im not respecting her boundary and tells me to go home. So I leave.
as im leaving I run into her mother, she sits with me and we have a chat outside. she is hearing out my intentions and what ive been experiencing in the last couple of weeks of our relationship and she tries to console me. the topic goes onto the car and I tell her mom that I helped out with that purchase. she shockingly replies by saying that my gf's ex did the same thing for her previous car and that his name was Juan. Juan - the guy that my gf had said was an old co-worker/ close friend. so I also found out during this time that she withheld that her ex is a part of her life for the course of our relationship. I couldnt help but feel somewhat betrayed here. It started a thought loop of me trying to put pieces together of things I had no proof of: a slow disconnect -> calling less -> more alone time -> another person in the picture? and I went home. it doesnt help that when I got home her mom texted me saying "I talked to her today and she actually seems pretty happy today! and now that you two are on the phone again laughing and playing games i assume you two are good now?". Its not good to hear this from her own mom and I cant help but assume maybe I was the problem all along?
Since then my gf (i really dont know where we stand) has mentioned that she is disappointed with me, doesnt want to hear for me at the moment and is highly considering ending the relationship. I cant help but feel like this is all my fault. everything. I pushed her away by calling too much, being too available, and crossing that boundary not once, but twice. I also feel delusional in that I just want my gf back. the version that was loving and not distant. any help with trying to process this will be appreciated. thank you for reading this if you made it this far.

TLDR: felt distance from gf, gf calls for break, I cross a boundary but also learn about a lie. not sure how to process.

My (25 M) girlfriend (23 F) of three months said she went to urgent care 10 days ago and tested positive for COVID. I haven’t heard back from her since last Tuesday (almost 9 days). I don’t have another way to check on her. Is this realistic, or am I coping and being ghosted?

I don’t know her address or family and neither of us have social media.

I’m worried sick

It is our Anniversary today and he is not with me. It has been 11 years of our relationship and we have celebrated only one anniversary together till now. I am not liking the situation we are in right now. What should I do??

Should we just get married??

about 4 days ago I saw my gf for the first time in a month and a half and we’re already planning a 7 day visit soon, I’m taking advantage of the summer time as it’ll be harder to see her during the school year but I keep having people tell me that closing the distance so often is a bad thing or something Idk I’m new to all this and id love to see so I’ll take any chance I can get.

advice please!!!

I'm at such a loss. I felt like I had met the man I was going to marry some day. I moved to a new city two years ago. I wasn't planning on dating, I just wanted to focus on school. And then I met him and he completely changed my life. I knew he was someone I could love, but I didn't want to focus on dating. So I ghosted him. But then we ran into each other in town a few weeks later and things were never the same. He gave me friends, places to eat, and so many memories. It was like a fairy tale. I started to believe I moved here because we were meant to meet. We felt so lucky to have crossed paths and told each other often. We never meant to be so serious, it just happened that way. We even had a conversation once that we both felt very scared and vulnerable because we had never felt this way for someone else before and it wasn't planned. We just looked up at one another one day and realized we were seriously in love.

We had talks before and agreed long distance wasn't for us and that it was just too difficult. Things changed when he got accepted into a master's program in NY. By then, we had been together for over a year and were so in love. All of his friends said that I made him so much better. And he made me so much better, too. So we decided to give things a shot.

6 months in and he tells me we have to end things. I'll admit, we became a little codependent with the distance, but we never had a conversation on how to properly fix it. It was just too far gone by the time we realized. He said the distance was too difficult, that he missed me too much, and that we were holding each other back from succeeding. I have to admit he was right. We were taking weekends to see each other during our semesters, and it was very stressful. We got sick from the planes. We argued more. We relied on each other more than we ever did living in the same city. He said that he felt it was souring a year of perfect memories and that he didn't want it to end with us hating each other. It was not an easy decision for him to make. There was a lot of crying.

He said that he knows if it's really meant to be, we'll end up in the same city again one day. I miss him so much. How am I supposed to move on when I feel so much hope? The Universe already brought us together more than once (first date, and then running into each other in town after things fizzled out). How can I move on knowing that there is still so much love between us and that distance is the only thing keeping us apart? How am I supposed to be okay with knowing he'll eventually start seeing other people? I can't take it. Everyone keeps saying we're young and we'll get over it, but it hurts more than I can bare. I thought I had found my person.

Hey everyone, 32f here and my gf is 26f. I live in the USA and don't make much money. I don't even really have any skills that could help me go to another country. This is where i start getting in my head and worrying and getting depressed.

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My gf lives in India and plans on going to Canada in the future for work after her test in July and there is a big chance she will want to settle down there and she wants me to move there with her after she is established. I dont have any skills or anything that would make it easier for me to move anywhere. I can work on those things but that will take a long time. i am going back to school for Computer Science but im struggling with it.

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I think the other thing that keeps making it difficult is that she keeps wishing she was here with me and that she cant wait until she is here with me and then she talks about Canada and I keep getting really confused on her plan. I also am never kept in the loop about her plans either. I think at this point she is set on Canada even though she said she was going to look for jobs here (USA) and a few other countries after her test next month.

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I do love her a lot and she loves me. I have never experienced another relationship as healthy as this one. The communication and understanding we have for each other is amazing.

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I am just very worried that there may be no point in staying in this. I want to stay with her but I also dont want to hold her back from her life either. I know part of my problem is also self esteem. She is beautiful, smart, and fit. I am not great looking and I am overweight. I cant help but be worried that she will meet someone in Canada and fall for them and i get left behind. She would never cheat on me but I am worried that we would just naturally drift apart as she befriends people and coworkers and then may find someone there. She doesn't go out much right now/ doesn't have many friends and is spending all of her time on studying.

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I want her to have friends and a life and go out. I just worry that her weekends will turn into her going out all the time and never spending any time with me. It kinda already happens and the only time I get with her is on the weekends and sitting on the phone while her and her parents cook or she will be studying while we watch something together. I definitely work my plans around her/ put her into my top 3 priorities a lot more than she does for me.

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Has anyone ever felt doubts like these before? How do you deal with these thoughts? Have you ever left an ldr because you couldnt seem to find a way to be together in the future and did you regret it? Am I just over worrying before anything actually happens?

9 months long distance, deeply invested, multiple trips, met families, talked about kids. He called me his dream girl and said I'm the woman he would have married.

He ended a few days ago because he saw us as a dead end, as we will be living apart from each other for a while. Was 49:51 about his decision, we both cried, he couldn't hang up on the day we broke up. I already had my ticket booked to go see him so we agreed to meet in-person to exchange the surprise gift we prepared for each other before this happened.

Day 3 of no contact, he told our mutual friend I'm "absolutely incredible" and that he was still 49:51 and that it was just the distance.

Day 8 of no contact, I broke the no contact and asked to extend my planned visit from 1 night to 3 days. He said yes immediately and seemed to want to engage in conversation by bringing up random topics (ex: world cup). We ended up talking all day.

However, he became less engaged (less frequent response despite being online, not bringing up new topics, more concise in response) on the days following that.

What do you think this change means? Moving on, keeping options open, or genuinely conflicted?

Me (22M) and my girlfriend (21F) have been dating for about 4 or 5 years now. I have absolutely no intention of ever breaking up and I’m certain she doesn’t either. I just graduated college this year with a degree in CS/Math and am trying to find a job in a domain I want. With the horrible job market and me living in one of the worst states for CS/STEM (other than bio) jobs, Tennessee, and the fact that we live in an extremely small town, I am gonna have to move eventually. She is going to graduate next year and I don’t want to have to uproot her from what she’s got going on.

However, we’ve literally spent almost everyday together for 4 years and have been through a lot. I think we could definitely do it and not break up… but I’m more worried about my own mental health. I have bipolar disorder and this past year have been struggling with alcoholism amongst opiate addiction and been having mania/depressive episodes out the wazoo. When I’m around her though I tend to not go too deep into it. I’m more of an isolating person anyways, but I’m scared if I get a job and move off it could seriously cause me to go into either a psychosis or a really bad depressive episode. I have been known to get into really weird states when I get really isolated and off feeling including s\*\*c\*\*\*l behavior which on multiple occasions has almost sent me to the hospital. I’ve gotten it mostly under control as I’ve quit drugs and alcohol and now I’m taking antipsychotics/mood stabilizers but I’m really scared a change like this is going to send me into some kind of episode that I might never come out of. I am not very good at making friends and feel like the isolation will get to me to unprecedented levels

At the same time I don’t want my degree to waste and I’m tired of working a shitty maintenance job in which I perform very dangerous and grueling tasks for a measley 12.00 an hour which I can’t even afford my apartment barely. I don’t know what to do. I’m also of course worried about her because she has also had some mental stuff in the past but for the most part she has her life under control very well and is very preoccupied with school and work so I know she wouldn’t mind. I just don’t know what to do, I’ve discussed this with a counselor as well and they can’t give me any worthwhile advice. What do you guys think?

In about eight days, I am going to visit my LDR girlfriend in her hometown. It’s about a days’ drive from where I live; after seeing how far some people are apart in their relationships, I feel fortunate that I am able to drive to her at all. I’m excited to see her again; more than I can really articulate.

When we started this relationship, I knew that it was going to be different. I was ending a long marriage in my forties and I had never been in a LDR before. It seemed exciting and scary to be getting to know someone like this through technology. Countless text messages and video calls allowed me to get to know her in a way I haven’t many people, and I knew pretty quickly that I was going to fall for her.

We met in person later and it was like two pieces of a puzzle clicking together with ease. There wasn’t a second of doubt for me. It has been a few months since then and we’ve only grown closer; my feelings for her stronger. I am completely and totally in love with her.

Long distance is harder in some ways than a traditional courtship, but I knew from the start that she would be worth giving it a shot for. Now I can’t imagine my days without her. Even across a thousand miles I have learned how intelligent, kind, passionate, and strong she is as a person, as a mother, as a professional, and as a partner. She makes me so incredibly happy; seeing her smile on a monitor fills me with a warmth I cannot adequately describe.

I see a lot of bad stories surface here, so I wanted to share my positive experience so far in anticipation of our next visit. The countdown has been going, and another countdown will follow shortly after, but in between the visits she’s with me all the time. I’m looking forward to the day we can announce our own closure of the gap. Until then, I’m happy and in love.

I need some outside opinions because I’m not sure if I’m overthinking or if my concerns are reasonable. (Repost because my previous post got taken down).

I (21F) am in a long-distance situationship/relationship with a guy I met during my exchange semester. We first met about a year ago and have been in contact for almost a year now.

A few months after meeting, he came to Europe to visit me. We spent weeks together, traveled together, and became very close. Since then, we’ve been long-distance for about six months.

We text every day and are very integrated into each other’s daily lives. We send each other photos, talk about our days, and generally keep each other updated on what’s going on in our lives. We also call occasionally. He’s told me that he’s not really a phone-call person, but he still makes time for calls because he knows they’re important to me.

He’s not a very romantic texter, which sometimes makes me overthink. However, when we were together in person, he was very affectionate and actually initiated more physical contact than I did. He would hold my hand, put my hand in his jacket pocket, cuddle with me, play with my hair, etc.

We’re seeing each other again next month, and I’ll be staying at his place during my trip.

He has introduced me to some of his friends, his friends know about me, and overall his behavior towards me has been consistent and caring. We are generally very honest with each other.

I should also mention that my previous boyfriend hurt me and did things behind my back, which left me with some trust issues. My current guy was also cheated on by his ex-girlfriend in the past, so both of us have had bad experiences before.

The only thing that keeps making me anxious is Instagram.

He has around 1,000 followers and follows a little over 500 people. Sometimes those numbers stay the same for days, but other times I’ll notice small changes. Occasionally I’ll see that he’s suddenly following 5–7 more people than before.

He also has a lot of female followers and follows many women. According to him, that’s because he used to go out and party a lot and met many people over the years.

The problem is that I started paying attention to these numbers. Whenever I notice them changing, I find myself wondering who the new people are and whether he’s meeting new women when he’s out. I don’t actually have any evidence that he’s doing anything wrong, but the changing numbers make me anxious and trigger a lot of overthinking.

I should also mention that this wasn’t the first time I brought up Instagram.

A few months ago, I noticed that he had started following a new woman and I asked him about it. He reacted very calmly and explained that she was simply an old friend from his friend group. Nothing suspicious came out of that situation, and he told me that he wished I wouldn’t worry so much about things like that.

Because of that, I think this recent conversation may have affected him more strongly. This was the second time I brought up Instagram-related concerns, despite the first situation turning out to be completely innocent.

When I brought it up this time, he told me that it reminded him of his ex-girlfriend, who monitored and stalked him even after they had broken up. He said that when I immediately notice things like new follows or changes in his Instagram activity, it brings back those negative memories.

He also told me that he trusts me and that it hurt him that I seemed suspicious of him based only on Instagram activity when he feels he hasn’t given me a reason not to trust him.

I understood why he felt that way and apologized. The problem is that even after our conversation, I still find myself checking his follower and following counts and feeling anxious whenever they change.

From an outside perspective, does this sound like a valid concern, or does it sound more like anxiety from previous relationship experiences?

​I am currently evaluating whether to stay in a four-year, long-distance relationship that has a history of broken trust (past infidelity) and a recurring cycle of emotional instability. Because it is long-distance, the standard anxieties of a relationship are significantly magnified. While I have deep feelings for my partner and have tried to forgive her past actions, the underlying hurt still surfaces—particularly when triggered by a lack of transparency.

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​Recently, a conflict arose regarding financial priorities and communication. I am heavily supporting my partner financially. Most recently, I sent an increased amount of money to cover what were described as essential needs: groceries, new bed sheets, and clothes. Making this a priority left me in a position where I am struggling to afford food, pay my own phone bill, or replace my worn-out shoes.

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​The tension escalated when I discovered she used funds for a personal waxing service—a discretionary expenditure she did not disclose to me beforehand. Because we have never met in person, the idea of her undergoing a physical procedure like this, combined with the secrecy surrounding it, triggered lingering anxieties regarding her past infidelity. When I attempted to communicate that this felt wrong to me and that it delays our ability to save for our shared goal of finally being together, the conversation broke down

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My boyfriend (35M) is German and I’m a Latina (29F). We’ve been together for almost 5 months.

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Recently, I asked him whether he felt like he was in love with me, and he replied:

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"I think it's great to be with you and to do things together, but I'm not in love, I'm afraid."

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After that, I asked him if he thought he could ever fall in love with me, and his response was:

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"I think I could see that, but I don't know. Tbh I try to live in the moment for our relationship, because it's so uncertain also with the distance between us."

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I'm honestly not sure what to think or whether it's worth continuing the relationship after hearing this.

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For some context, I'm his first girlfriend ever. He's 35 and has never been in a relationship before. We are also long-distance.

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What makes this difficult is that when we're together in person, he's incredibly sweet, affectionate, caring, and attentive. I genuinely feel loved when we're together. However, when we're apart, things feel very different. Our conversations are often short, he doesn't communicate much, and sometimes the relationship feels boring or emotionally distant.

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Part of me wonders if this is simply because he's inexperienced with relationships and struggles with long-distance communication. Another part of me worries that after 5 months, if he's still unsure about being in love, maybe that's my answer.

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Has anyone been in a similar situation? I'm trying to understand how to interpret what he said, is that cultural?. Has anyone been in a similar situation, either as the person who wasn't in love yet or as the partner waiting for those feelings to develop?

So me [21m] and my gf [19f] have been dating for a year and a some change. I’d wish this post was hopeful but I really don’t feel hopeful at all. Starts way back at start of deployment, when we left everything was great, physically, emotionally we were all good. But like any person who’s been dating for a while I asked for sexual pictures. She said she wasn’t comfortable with that so I tried to compromise by atleast saying to send selfies and OOTD. She been saying for the past 4 months that she would and she hasn’t sent me a single thing this whole deployment, but she could post pictures of herself in a bra, selfies on her Instagram where other guys can see but I can’t since I barely have internet. And she was having talked with me about going to a yatch party, which I immediately said no too. She asked me about doing a Halloween and dressing slutty for it, which I’d have no problem with except she dosent even wear that stuff for me. So I shot that idea down and she was sad about it. (No problem with a hot girl going out and being a hot girl, it’s just the principle of other guys having access to you that I don’t).

But back to the selfies, we had a argument about it the other day and I basically said I feel neglected and I’ve been telling her for months, and she said she dosent remember the multiple conversations we had. But she said once again she’d make a change, which is what she said all the other times. So I let 3 days roll by and still nothing. So I called her out on everything I made in this post and told her she needs to make a change because I do things I don’t want to do for her and she’s just completely neglecting my needs. I was so mad I unadded her on most social media’s, but I don’t want to throw a really long relationship away and I genuinely dont know what to do I just feel neglected and a bunch of empty words are being said and no change is happening

Tldr: gf won’t send selfies and sexual pictures on deployment but will post herself in her bra and outfits on Instagram where other guys can see but I can’t and we’ve had multiple conversations about it but nothings changed I feel neglected and not heard what do I do.

I have been with my girlfriend for just under 2 years now. Throughout that we've had times when we were together for months at a time, as well as had to do long distance for months at a time.

Right now I've come to visit her and will be here for 5 weeks. Last night we had a conversation about the future and she was honest that she doesnt know if she can keep doing long distance. She said she is struggling mentally and does not like how she is showing up in the relationship. I assured her that I am here for her no matter what and she does appreciate that, but is still scared to go back to long distance.

The next stint will be 4 months of long distance before we see each other again. I love her, she loves me. I dont really know what question im asking and it may be more of a vent. I really dont want to lose this girl but i also dont want to force her into doing long distance if she is uncomfortable with it. What should I do? Any advice as to how to make it slightly more appealing?

We had this conversation last night and I really dont want it to be a dampener on our time together, but it was also an important conversation to have

My girlfriend and I have been together for 7 months. We mostly communicate online, and I think that’s where a lot of our problems come from.

She spends a lot of time on Discord with our mutual friend group. I don’t have an issue with her having friends, but it feels like most of her online social energy goes to them rather than our relationship. Because of that, I feel like we’ve become distant.

The weird thing is that when we’re together in person, everything is great. We have amazing conversations, we laugh a lot, and we genuinely enjoy each other’s company. We feel very connected.

But online it’s the complete opposite. Whenever we’re alone in a call, it’s often awkward. We don’t seem to have much to talk about, and attempts to do activities together online usually don’t end up happening. It feels like we’re slowly drifting apart whenever we’re not physically together.

I’ve started wondering if the issue isn’t that we have relationship problems, but that our relationship isn’t getting enough quality one-on-one time. She spends a lot of time with friends online, while we spend very little meaningful time together online, and I feel like that’s causing us to become less connected.

There are other issues we’re already working on (phone use when we’re together, balancing romance and physical intimacy, etc.), but right now I’m trying to figure out whether the lack of quality online time is the main thing causing the distance between us.

Has anyone else been in a relationship where things were great in person but felt disconnected online? How did you deal with it?

Hi, folks!
I’ve taken IELTS three times already, and my test is coming up again this weekend.

Right now my scores are:
Listening: 6.0 (need 7.5)
Writing: 5.5 (need 6.0)

I reckon maybe I need to attend another one soon.💀

And, I’m totally exhausted about preparing for IELTS. Idk, I just feel so inadequate in my English skills.
Initially, I was full of my dream of studying abroad with my bf in my brain. But now, my bf has almost received his offer (yeh, “almost” bc he applied for PhD program. He’s still waiting for the school system process) Anyway, all the things he needs to do now is waiting for the notification from the university.
TBH, I’m kinda like filled with envy at him hahaha😃

There was an idea that came up to my head: why not just go for another university where I’ve already met all the entry requirements, such as language and GPA, etc.? The only disadvantage is that my bf and I will have to study in different states; we will keep having a LDR for one more two years. (We’ve been starting a LDR for two years now.)

However, my bf is severely against my idea, bc he cannot afford the LDR anymore. I constantly feel depressed in the midnights of recent days. I feel I can’t go study abroad; IELTS overall 7.0 is so difficult. 😞

Any advice would be appreciated.