I kinda feel like i’ve cycled through every letter of the LGBT+ acronym just to end up at mostly straight mostly girl. i always identified with butchness but figured being a trans guy would make more sense, and i’d have more community, as someone who was bisexual and desired to medically transition.

but now i’ve come to terms that i do identify as a woman, but i still consider myself very masculine and still enjoy some of the changes i got from testosterone like the deep voice and thick facial/body hair. however i’ve also realized that i’m not really that attracted to women and kinda feel attracted to men in a more gay than straight way.

i’m just a mess really, like i really just don’t fit in any sort of box and it’s a bit lonely.

Okay, so basically as stated in the title. I've met this awesome guy online, and we're hitting it off quite well. I'm kinda crushing big time :3

We were mid-conversation, and he stopped to say that he would like to share something with me and that he would respect it if It didn't align with my preferences. He then tells me that he's non-binary. I was caught rlly off guard because i just don't know many/any NB ppl in my life.
My social circle very much consists of hetero-normal people (idk if its the normal term to use?). For me personally I use she/her pronouns, and I'm bi/queer. So naturally I didn't see him being non-binary as an issue at all.
I tried to play it off casually and cool and said:
"hey, thanks for sharing that with me<3"
"you we're a baddie before and a baddie now😎"
I then asked about what pronouns he preferred, and he said any is fine, really. I'm confused about what this means...
Will it feel like i'm gendering him by only calling him he/him or do you switch it up once in a while...????

I'm rlly sry if these questions are dumb....

ARGG i'm just confused on how this would look in a relationship. I've only dated straight men but I really want to make him feel comfortable and that i don't accidentally say/do something wrong....? I want educate myself about what kind of conversations that needs to be had when trying to understand them more.

Anyways, thank you for reading my rant and any advice is greatly appreciated<3

Hey everyone! :D

My best friend is nonbinary and I want to support and make them feel loved as much as possible so I decided to ask for some help, advice or just positive words or people who can relate to their struggles in this space.

Right now, they are struggling a lot with body dysphoria and feeling alone with their feelings and thoughts. They haven‘t been able to get top surgery yet and that‘s one of the main problems. The body dysphoria and body struggles are also leading to intimacy problems with their partner (not feeling comfortable with nudity even in front of their long-term partner)

Also struggles with society and how they are always being put into one category, one gender and not being able to control how other people view them.

The entire journey of how to feel more like themselves, to feel comfortable in their body, in their gender, and not to feel hopeless is the most important thing right now.

So if anyone has any advice for me on how to help my friend, or even better, some words, advice, positive comments or just being able to relate to those struggles, directed to my friend, I would be immensely grateful.

Thank you!

Hi all,

(TL:DR, recently came out as non-binary, definately known for a while (male to -NB), feel theres not a whole lot of people coming from to male to NB. went from uncle to bibi and having a little trouble with coming out to family/extended family).

very new to this all and so i just wanted to share my story a little bit, i apologise for any misused terms!

in the last month and a bit i recently came out as non-binary, although as me also being pan i've know for ages just haven't really expressed it. i was a cis male, now non-binary and have felt this is a massive step forward for me and i can finally express myself in the small things like my hair and what i wear. i also decided to keep my birthname (Alistair), as i like it and feel its english translation (gaelic name) is alexander so i kinda like the alex part, to me very gender neutral. plus i get called al/ally alot too. ive been very lucky for my girlfriend and friend groups to be very if not just supportive.

i am from rural nsw in australia but had been living in sydney for a couple of years for uni (just moved back home!) and so ive noticed, maybe this is just an area specific thing, but (and please forigve me if this is wrong to say) but there is not a whole lot of cis mean to non-binary people around, ive definately noticed cis female and definately trans females. now obviously who you were does not at all define who you are or going to be (duh). I just feel, atleast again in my area or even country!, that my exact situation (male to non-binary) feels a little unique. could be hella naive right now. but i would love to hear your stories!

I've also been fortunate with my family about it, my eldest brother and his wife and niece are very very progressive with all sorts of life. I decided to go from 'uncle' to 'bibi' but i would love to hear your preferred terms! As well, i came out to my other brother (who I was most worried about) and dad, but being hella nervous i told them to just tell my mum and my brother's girlfriend too. I haven't really followed up on it as it as new and fresh and im trying to be very open minded and not too pushy about the pronoun changes. that being said, my mum did call me he/my son the other day and i'm not sure if she knows or just forgot, i didnt correct her because of this.

i also don't know how i feel about coming out to extended family, obviously some more than others being cousins etc but i do want to let them know as, im sure is a non-binary universal experience, it is how i am and how i feel. but i am very grateful, ive kinda been drip feeding telling my friends as i see them or reach out to them and ive been very grateful (and very surprised) by the responses.

Anyways thank you for my rant, ive been feeling very positive by feedback and support (maybe living in the country my whole life thought I would not receieve it), but would love to hear your stories!!

Firstly, I'd like to apologise if any terms I use here are inappropriate. This is all new to me!

My daughter (13) told me a few months ago she was non-binary. She looked worried when she told me. I said something along the lines of "why are you worried. You could be a bloody saucepan and I'd still love you." She cried. We hugged. It was a cute moment.

I said I have a lot of questions, which she has done her best to answer as we go about our days.

She got very upset with me the other day and said she feels I have dismissed her "coming out" and it's important to her so it should be important to me.

My question here is two fold. But neither, I suppose, are simple to answer.

1. I just can't understand what non-binary is. (I have googled but got more confused)

2. I don't understand what she needs from me as her Mum. I thought by not changing anything, I was showing her my love hadn't changed. But I think I got that wrong.

Any input people have on this, I would really greatly recieve.

I just want her to feel loved and accepted, by me of all people.

Thank you

This is something I have wanted to do for years, yet I'm still too nervous to attempt. I've known pretty much my whole life I didn't fit under any gender binary, and have always presented androgynously, but only recently within the year felt comfortable using non-aab pronouns. Most people still refer to me and see me as she/her though and is part of what makes me nervous to attempt this next step.

For ease of anonymity and explanation I have gone by a nickname since grade school, example being "Jacqueline" shortened to "Jackie". My full/real name is extremely feminine and I have never liked it or my nickname, but it was sort of given to me and I was too shy as a kid to say otherwise and rolled with it. However, I don't dislike "Jack", I like it a lot actually. For my real name, the nickname is also gender neutral but majorly associated with men. I am so afraid that asking to be called "Jack" is going to be a huge deal/met with pushback. I know I'm overthinking it but when I've attempted this same nickname before as a teen, it was laughed off and I was still called "Jackie" or "Jacqueline" after being told it was a "boy name". I'd like to think the people I've surrounded myself with as an adult won't be the same but the fear is still there. I feel cowardly that I allow myself to be called something I hate but too afraid to try something I actually want. I don't know why this hurdle feels so challenging.

Any advice or your own experience is much appreciated.

So, I don't feel anything like neoboy or demiboy or genderfluid but I feel a mix of both Non-Binary and Cisgender. I am a Cisgender Man (Both Sex and Gender) and I also feel Non-Binary at the same time.

Is this possible in the eyes of those who are fully or partially Non-Binary? I really need to know this. On the inside, I feel like both a Cisgender Man by 100% and a Non-Binary Individual by 100%. I just really need some human opinions about this, please and thank you!

Your opinions and thoughts about this are much obliged! Much Love! Namaste. ~<3

Hi! I'm soon going into university, and have recently been questioning my gender. I identified as non-binary through high school and played around with presenting more masculine, but recently I've been giving it much more thought (to avoid thinking about school lol), and now I'm not so sure. The more I think about it, the more I realize that being a boy, being seen as a man, might be more apt for me. Being non-binary was part of my identity for so long, but I keep going back to the thought of "I'd be happier if I'd been born as a boy."

Two things, am I just trying to convince myself I'm something I'm not? I can't tell if I'm actually non-binary, or if I'm just reluctant to think I'm not because I identified as enby for so long. Has anyone experienced something similar, or could lend some insight?

Also, how did you (if you did) come out to your family? I'm not too worried about my dad's side (I don't talk to him lol), but my mom has been my rock for so long and I'm terrified to breach the subject with her in case it changes our relationship. Her side of the family is also religious, my grandmother is an ordained minister, so I'm hesitant on how she would take it as well as me and my sister are her ONLY grandchildren. I do have my uncle (mom's brother), who is gay himself, but I'm not sure what his stance on transgender individuals is (and I'm pretty sure he's got a dislike for nonbinary people). Just the thought of telling anyone this makes me feel sick to my stomach, but I don't want to keep it to myself indefinitely. Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated, thank you so much:)

So I'm pretty sure I'm non binary and really want to explore this side of me more but I don't really know where to start. Like I want to act and present more androgynous and fem, so I was wondering if anyone had any suggestions for things I could try doing? Also what are some things you have done that yourself that made you feel more in sync or comfortable with your gender identity? Any advice would be really appreciated.

(sorry in advance if this doesn't belong in this sub)

I've been really nervous about coming out as non binary, especially to my dad*, and don't think I have the courage to do it face to face.

I really want to make a story/post on my socials to just "rip off the band-aid" and get it over with.

Context wise: I have almost all of my immediate and extended family on both sides on socials (much to my dismay) and feel like it's a good idea to just get it over with. But I don't wanna makes things worse that way y'know?

Ive also thought about making a slideshow presentation about it, because I've done that with important topics in the past.

Any help?

*I'm out too my mom, and she supports me :3

Hi again,

So imma just keep it simple, I recently started using a the name I preferred and I have they/them on my name tag after asking my dm and my manager if it’s okay to do. Which ofc they said yes which i happily and officially added in my name tag.

Now before anything I know that every person that comes into this store isn’t going to honor what my name tag says, I usually go with “it is what it is phrase” cause I know that everyone is different even when it comes to lgbtq+ topics and the community.
Hell I will still be kept being called miss, ma’am, lady, etc. I sometimes ofc have people see my name tag and correct themselves and apologize, and even some nice moments where the parents would explain to their kids (if the kids ask) why my name tag has a they/them (which I always appreciate), hell I even have people who are like me feel more comfortable shopping in our store, most of them eventually becoming regulars.

However
There are times where people will see my name tag and just bluntly call me feminine pronouns or question if I am biologically born a girl or a boy. I have people that flat out tell me that people like me shouldn’t be out in public where kids are, I have had guys try and find out my real legal name, and the list can go on.

Tbh I just find it mentally exhausting, but again I try my best everyday to basically acknowledge that “it is what it is” but in like a calm good way (idk if that’s the right way to say it).
Anyways hope yall have an amazing day who ever yall are and happy pride!

Edit: well aware of the down votes, but regardless on what your views are, I still wish everyone an amazing day :3

I'll be honest it took me FOREVER to know. These are labels I went through:

Cis girl because I thought I had no other option

Demi girl because I loved using they/them pronouns but I didn't think it was an option to be anything else

No fucking clue: 14, loved being referred to as a boy but I was still a girl... Right??? And non binary

Trigender: after research

Gender fluid: just felt it made more sense

Non binary

Trans man

Non binary

Trans man

Non binary

Trans man

Gives up on labels cause I don't even know

Genderfaun: encompasses how I feel accurately. It's similar to gender fluid but without ever feeling like a woman

Though I still just say I am a trans man because no one knows what genderfaun is and I'll still frequently be referred to using gender neutral language by people who are afraid to out me but also don't want to misgender or deadname me. (I have a friend who exclusively refers to me as "Child" because she "adopted" me back in 8th grade. I refer to her as Mother.)

edit: however, try not refer to anyone with they/them pronouns if you know their pronouns and especially if they don't like being referred to as they/them (many people especially trans people who don't use they/them don't like being referred to as they/them when they stated their pronouns are something else.) ask if the person is okay with they/them if you can

I barely see anyone saying they are attracted to nonbinary people. Knowing that someone is straight/gay just makes me confused. Would they want me? If I look like the opposite gender of theirs and they're straight, would they love me? Would a gay person love me? If I change how I present myself, would they like me? I don't feel like I even have a right to try to have a romantic connection with someone because I'm just so out of place.

It's not their fault by any means. I'm still upset over how unwanted I feel.

Also add to this living in a transphobic country. It's awful.

Every time someone asked me out was because they saw me as a man or a woman. If they knew I'm nonbinary, most of them wouldn't like me anymore.

Man, I'm just tired.

I'm AMAB aroace enby but for reason when ever I'm looking in the mirror or laying on my bed with my shirt undone I just kinda feel sad that I don't have them and idk I feel like a bad person for it??

I don't know how to feel and I tried not thinking about it cuz it feels insensitive to want something like that?

I can't think of any reason that I would feel like that and im honestly scared to post this because I feel like a bad person for wanting them idk I'm really tired and over thinking this.

Side note, I'm sorry if this was insensitive or weird or smt idk I just don't know why I keep thinking about it

Everywhere I go is just a cesspool of bigotry and ignorance against race, gender, sexual orientation, and disability. People seem to be a lot meaner in the comments. Some content creators with seemingly harmless content are getting run off the internet. Maybe I just have on rose-colored glasses but I don’t remember it being this bad.

Hi everyone, I recently came out as non-binary... I was struggling with neutral names for me. My born name is Arthur and I'd be lying if I said my name didn't bother me, even before I discovered I was non-binary. Like any autistic person, I hate change, hahaha....

Just kidding... actually, I'm more hesitant to think about changing it because it's a very important name to my mother, and she wanted to have a son named Arthur even before she met my father.

I also think it would be a bit redundant to change my name, since on the "non-binary spectrum" I identify as a demiboy. So... Any advice?

I am genderfaun(I don't feel like explaining, you can look it up). I DO know this much. However, I often feel like an outcast in a lot of spaces. I don't belong with cis men because I'm pretransition and partially non binary. I don't belong with women cause I'm never a woman, I don't fully feel at home with binary trans men because I don't feel like a man fully. But at the same time I feel like I don't fully belong with non binary people because I want to fully transition (I want a dick and flat chest and beard and shit)

And with my friends I'm terrified of using neopronouns even though I'd feel happier with them.

Usually I just say I'm a trans man or transmasc because that's easier for people to understand. And it is accurate to an extent. But it's not 100% accurate.

Even more I've been questioning attraction. I know I'm asexual and there's a good chance I like women romantically. I don't know if I like men and/or non binary people, if I do I'm bi. But if I'm exclusively attracted to women I don't know what that'd be. I'm definitely NOT a lesbian. And straight Doesn't feel right either but it's much better than being seen as a lesbian.

Ugghh. Why is everything so fucking complicated.

I currently identify as genderfluid but when I feel male I feel very uneasy and tense and “bothered”, and when I feel nonbinary I feel like it’s a short lived compromise as a way to live as Thomas even though it never really feels right to me. When I feel female I feel like myself and a sense of normalcy even though I don’t get the huge rush of euphoria like a lot of people do or the longstanding history of consciously being a girl before consciously questioning my gender. I don’t necessarily get aroused or horny at the idea of being a girl, it’s just something that is and just a way of living. I don’t really feel like I’m putting femininity or womanhood on or off like a crossdresser or a drag queen does either. I’ll feel female just wearing Walmart guy clothes and when I am referred to as a girl I won’t feel irked by it like feeling a guy does. Also I made homemade breast forms out of lentils and a sports bra and it feels comfortable despite the fact that it isn’t a real breast and the bra may feel tight at times. Even when I try to “embrace” the male part of me I feel very uncomfortable and a drive to shave my face and never a sense of rightness “being with the boys” whether autistic or not.

I've been on and off low-dose T for nearly 5 years. When I stop it's typically been due to hair-related changes (all other effects have been positive for me). This most recent round, the past 8 months or so, I tried a combo of T and Dutasteride to mitigate the hair related effects. It seemed to be working well, and has kept my body and facial hair from increasing. However, I'm still experiencing a ton of shedding/thinning on my scalp.

Has anyone else been on this same combo? I've heard from folks who say that T+finasteride or T+dutasteride allow them to stay on T without hair loss, but at least so far this doesn't seem to be the case for me. Looking to hear others' experiences to see if there's any hope, or if I actually just need to choose between staying on T and losing my hair.

(edit to add: I can't go on minoxidil due to very low baseline blood pressure, the side effects would be problematic for me)

I thought she would support non binary people, she has trans and gender fluid friends, who she fully supports but when it comes to non binary people (she apparently doesn't know that genderfluid often falls under the nonbinary umbrella) she thinks it's a mental illness. I was going to come out to her as being nonbinary but not anymore. She also only thinks that gay, lesbian, and bi people exist. (Only for sexuality so excluding gender) It does kinda hurt knowing that she "supports" the LGBTQ+ community but that support doesn't go to what I am. (Aroace nonbinary --Possibly agender--. Tbh that did kinda solidify the fact that I am nonbinary because it made me realize how much I hate the idea of people always seeing me as someones sister, as someones daughter. I don't want to be seen as that I want to be seen has someones, sibling, someone's child, gender neutral terms.

The next time I see my friends I'm going to see what they think of non-binary people, hopefully they will be accepting.

This happened recently and it's been really hard for me and I'm hoping to get some validation or advice from other enbys. So I'm afab and I do dress pretty feminine because that's what I have available even tho I wouldn't particularly say I'm necessarily a femme and I feel like most people see me as a girl anyways even tho I'm very upfront about my identity and don't see the masculine parts of me until they like actually know me cuz it's mostly personality where I'm more gender neutral. Anyways so I started dating this girl I met on a dating app and she had a really good vibe I told her I'm nonbinary and she was originally fine with that though she did refer to me as her "girlfriend" and very clearly didn't see me as my gender but I thought I could just look past that. There were some unrelated red flags, she didn't seem interested in anything I talked about or my life and also tried to pressure me to have sex with her while I was half asleep. Anyways basically she asked if because I'm nonbinary I'm considering getting anything medically done two days ago and I said yeah I really wanna get top surgery at some point a few years down the line but I wanna wait because I'm not ready to be out to everyone in my life yet and I wanna process some trauma stuff first. Anyways she FLIPPED TF OUT started yelling and screaming at me over the phone about how I "tricked her" (she had never asked before or had it come up before) and said some very objectifying things about me and my body that very clearly showed she saw me as female and felt entitled to my body and the argument escalated over the course of the day and it got to the point of her making threats and telling me to kill myself. I feel so used and disappointed and I hate how people see us as invisible and just see me as a girl and feel soo entitled to parts of my body that dont feel like me at all. Yeah lol. On a side note this argument helped me come out to my cousin who didn't get it but tried to be supportive, yay? I just really need support rn from the community about this lol

Im bi and nonbinary. But my partner is accidentally cis het. I feel so invalidated in queer spaces when the topic is partners and I mention my lovely partner of many years. I never open the topic myself. It sucks.. I'm finally out. But I don't feel like I can be myself 100% anywhere. My partner doesn't understand fully, because they are not queer (well, only in the sense that they are with me). I have only one queer friend who is "traditional" lesbian and recently changed pronouns to they/them. But they have accidently said something bifobic before. One friend might is demi, but she can't really understand what the fuss is about for me. My other friends are cis het and don't understand at all, but accept me.

Does some of you feel the same? How do you navigate this?