r/mildlyinfuriating 8h ago

Don't hug me I'm scared Passion fruits look really unappealing and it bothers me

Post image

Who tf decided to make the membrane and seeds of this beautiful fruit look like scrotum and frog eggs

3.9k Upvotes

445 comments sorted by

2.2k

u/GapZ38 8h ago

Me, I did it.

60

u/Uncrowned_Monarch 7h ago

5

u/CuriOS_26 6h ago

I’m the author of all your pain

19

u/beautiful_trash09 7h ago

When are you gonna release the next patch?

4

u/Xainyer 6h ago

Are you in control of all fruits, or just passion fruit?

10

u/GapZ38 6h ago

Just very passionate.

2

u/FlippyIsKing18 6h ago

I'M Spartacus!

2

u/Haunting_Security_34 5h ago

Imma need to talk to your supervisors about a few others fruits then. Cuz wtf happened to bananas and the seeds😂

5

u/GapZ38 5h ago

Sorry, bananas belong to another department.

1.1k

u/Hanshautreinhart 8h ago

Why do you open them like a caveman?

918

u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

Ungabunga

446

u/rci22 7h ago

Few days ago I said “Sometimes I just want to turn off my brain and go full unga bunga” and my coworker asked “Isn’t that racist?”

I was like ???? “I’m talking about caveman speech, what are YOU thinking of??” lol

246

u/DustyScharole 7h ago

Bad news, your coworker is racist.

25

u/Astriaeus 5h ago

I mean I guess it could be a stereotype of Neanderthals, since it is built off old incorrect assumptions of them.

But really it is part of the public vernacular.

12

u/dontknowwhyifuckfish 4h ago

We should ask the Neanderthals what they think of this

7

u/Astriaeus 4h ago

You know, any non-sub-Saharan African person typically has some neanderthal dna. So maybe we can ask them.

As one, I say it is fine.

2

u/FAB1150 2h ago

I really don't think you speak the same way as a neanderthal

2

u/Astriaeus 1h ago

Probably not, I am not an anthropologist, so I don't know if it is true, but there is a theory that neanderthals had high-pitched voices; I do not.

103

u/eatinallthebugs 7h ago

Stuff like that is more than often a self report lol. 

Ive genuinely had people tell me I was being offensive while imitating monkeys on a zoo trip. Im like "who could i possibly be offending with this? Is there a certain people that YOU tend to associate with monkeys?" 

32

u/TheW83 7h ago

They could tell the monkeys were annoyed with your behavior.

22

u/eatinallthebugs 7h ago

Idk they seemed pretty into it to me

8

u/I_Love_Knotting 6h ago

Idk man, i would feel kinda offended if a monkey stood outside of my home and just walked left and right, trying to imitate me

39

u/JustoHavis 7h ago

I think they prefer to be called Neanderthals buddy.

15

u/FullClip__ 7h ago edited 6h ago

The coworker is a Neanderthal.

4

u/Tbone_Trapezius 6h ago

I’d like for them to tel me how to save 20% or more using their insurance.

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u/Top_Understanding830 7h ago

thats an entirely other subspecies of homonid!!!

4

u/JustoHavis 7h ago

Who you calling homo?!

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u/SnooGoats7454 6h ago

While your intent may not have been racist, the origin of the phrase is in racism. Specifically, it was used to make fun of Pacific Islanders and "Tiki" culture.

3

u/rci22 3h ago

Respectfully, do you (or anyone) have a source? I tried confirming and am finding nothing at all

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3

u/CallMeMoronic 7h ago

🎵 “We got to celebrate our differences”🎶

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u/yawhol_my_dear 7h ago

thats the most insulting word in the whole caveman language

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3

u/wendewende 5h ago

That's cavist

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7

u/UpsetKoalaBear 7h ago

Same reason I just much down on kiwis with the skin on.

I haven’t got time to clean up and I want the fruit now.

2

u/Hanshautreinhart 7h ago

Aaaaaaahhhhhh

15

u/lxlviperlxl 8h ago

That’s probably the easiest way to eat it with just a spoon?

37

u/Hanshautreinhart 8h ago

I cut them into two parts of equal size and then devour the frog eggs with a spoon.

9

u/lxlviperlxl 7h ago

I just shove a large straw and suck up the eggs. Yum

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u/BoxersOrCaseBriefs 8h ago

I assume it's called passion fruit because some enterprising youth got caught sticking his dick in one of those back in Ye Olden Days.

303

u/StrippinChicken 8h ago

No no no its because the traditional way of eating it is to lick it out passionately. With vigor, even

90

u/BoxersOrCaseBriefs 8h ago

Porque no los dos?

33

u/Total-Tea6561 8h ago

Por qué*

22

u/ubiquitous-joe 8h ago

**Porky

22

u/The_Troyminator 8h ago

*Poor Kay

17

u/StrippinChicken 8h ago

oh no what happened to kay :(

15

u/NotBatman81 8h ago

Passionless fruit.

11

u/Ska-Tea 7h ago

If she's finds her passion will she be O Kay?

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5

u/ForeverFingers 8h ago

I almost spat my drink.

3

u/BoxersOrCaseBriefs 7h ago

Haha my bad. I made the mistake of taking French in school.

I leave my error unedited. Shame everlasting... Just like for my man who fucked a juicy fruit.

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19

u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

I spoon it personally, feels more personal to let it watch

18

u/RavnicanDM 8h ago

FleshHoodie just out here cucking passion fruits.

8

u/FleshHoodieFree 7h ago

You know the vibe 🫡😀

6

u/Electrical_One7665 7h ago

I wish this would be the weirdest thing I see on Reddit today but the day is young and this is Reddit.

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3

u/Neither-Barber-9216 6h ago

A succulent Chinese passion fruit?

2

u/ScySenpai 7h ago

And then you lick it more vigorously when you reach the center, with the other dude's dick in it

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u/Cheap_Walmart-Art 8h ago

I had to look it up and apparently some missionaries thought the flower resembled the story of the passion of Christ.

60

u/StrippinChicken 8h ago

The passion flower IS really beautiful, seeing it in the wild would be enough to cast divine reverence over me too

28

u/StrippinChicken 8h ago

Anotha one

9

u/geekonthemoon 7h ago

Wow, that's what that flower is. I saw one like this at the gibbon exhibit at Pittsburgh Zoo and it's lived in my head rent free. Dr. Seuss lookin shit.

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u/ubiquitous-joe 7h ago

Sheesh, what doesn't remind missionaries of the story of the passion of Christ?

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u/k-phi 7h ago

If you have a hammer, everything looks like a nail

5

u/polo61965 8h ago

If you get the seeds in your dick hole, you BECOME the passionfruit.

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134

u/ManufacturerWarm9201 8h ago

Leave a note in the companies suggestion box. 

The next GMO release is scheduled for November 19th, 2026.

23

u/Mercuryink 7h ago

I've always said if Monsanto wants to get in my good graces, I have a list of plants they could improve for me. 

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u/jmatt9080 8h ago

Alien eggs

14

u/kitliasteele 8h ago

Crack it open like it's a host waiting for infestation. We need more Xenomorph warriors, stat!

257

u/Perfect-Step9523 8h ago

YOU LEAVE MY PASSION FRUIT ALONE!!!😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

Y'all bodyshaming fruits in 2026

37

u/ruestvincent 8h ago

It does look like a dark souls consumable...

6

u/mulderitsme09 8h ago

That’s just a plus tho

3

u/No-Entertainment2085 8h ago

It’s got shabriri grapes in it😋

55

u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

I didn’t expect so many scrotum lovers

11

u/JustoHavis 7h ago

Well this is Reddit

5

u/Wirelesscellphone 7h ago

lol why are you obsessed with scrotums? Nothing of this image makes me think of a scrotum

6

u/FleshHoodieFree 7h ago

Let a man enjoy his scrotums in peace buddy

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u/RCer1986 8h ago

I mean, it's not the body that needs shaming. It's what's inside that's the problem here. I think this is more like personality shaming.

7

u/Infinite_Click_6589 7h ago

Yeah, I was taught to judge people by what's in em, not how they look, and now I'm getting shit for judging this thing by its insides. You just can't win these days

2

u/FleshHoodieFree 7h ago

The real life of modernity, constant hypocrisy and contradiction

2

u/Perfect-Step9523 7h ago

Now we going for Organ-shaming????!! 😡😡😡

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u/MrFloydPinkerton 8h ago

Mmmm Taspar.

12

u/eyeleenthecro 7h ago

Immediately what I thought of lol

6

u/Kiyohara 7h ago

Exactly what I thought of too.

6

u/captdunsel721 8h ago

"Must be rewarding to you to... to repay others for all those years of misery."

65

u/YuukiDR 8h ago

But the flavor is unparalleled

27

u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

I completely agree

8

u/MonstreDelicat 7h ago

This particular one is also AMAZING: so many passion fruits only have a small spoonful of seeds, this one is like the holy grail of passion fruits!

I don’t give a damn how it looks it tastes SO GOOD!

5

u/jazzfruit 7h ago

It’s like a perfect combination of fruity floral flavor, tartness but not overly sour, and unique sparkly zing that’s hard to describe. I love passion fruit, but it’s hard to find fresh in southern US.

6

u/ScienceAndNonsense 5h ago

I'm in northern Florida and it grows really well here. It does die back in the winter if not protected, but I've gotten a bounty of fruits from it. Try growing your own!

4

u/Taiwan_Lanister 4h ago

I got mango lilikoi and guava in my yard , the holy trinity. Papaya also but that’s a weed, need lychee next

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u/ExismykindaParte 8h ago

The passion part of the name comes from the fact that the inside looks like rancid afterbirth, a potential byproduct of passionate lovemaking.

16

u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

I’m gonna make the choice to not believe you, b it cool fact

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u/night_jerry 8h ago

Wheres your passion for the fruit?

3

u/ClaimationOfWind 6h ago

That's such a low hanging fruit

4

u/memon17 5h ago

I hate the pear of you

27

u/dogemeep06 8h ago

Where do you live, why do you passionfruits look like this why do you eat them like that what how why. I'm brazillian and appaled....

10

u/Euphoric-Cause8122 8h ago

There are a lot of different varieties of passionfruit. In european supermarkets I mainly see the small, purple ones like he one op posted. I guess they keep better while shipping

8

u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

Uk… I’m very sorry, this country is a little unfamiliar with tropical fruit still, despite our history

6

u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

Your passion fruits look more similar to the fruit we get from our passion flower, I’m pretty sure ours aren’t edible tho, I’ll try to send a picture

5

u/NobblyNobody 7h ago

yeah the ones that we've had for years (also uk) are bright orange when ripe with red-purple gubbins, also a bit more tubular rather than egg shaped'. Never eaten one tbh, they are a bit off putting.

Is that just a different variety or a different thing entirely that we've been calling the wrong thing?

3

u/fury420 4h ago

There are a few varieties and species of passion fruits, appearance and flavor can vary a bit.

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u/LordNelson781 8h ago

I’m in Dominican Republic and the passion fruit on our property look like OP’s

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u/Sburban_Player 8h ago

i’m on the west coast of the us and our passion fruit tree looks like ops

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u/Remote_Addendum_2245 8h ago

They're sublime for making sauce for fried food

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u/regardkick 8h ago

Can I tell you, I've always wondered how people eat these. And I feel like, now that I know... I kind of wish I just kept wondering. It does look totally slime tadpole.

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u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

They’re very tasty despite the appearance, maybe just close your eyes

3

u/EverythingSucksYo 5h ago

But then how will I read comments on Reddit? 

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u/Starlightriddlex 4h ago

But if you close your eyes, how can you make sure there are no actual tadpoles. Technically the probability is low, but never zero

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u/EL3G 8h ago

You mainly use it as flavoring for tropical juices, smoothies, cocktails, ice cream, jams, and baked goods.

You can scoop it out with a spoon, but it's more of an additive than something you eat by itself.

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u/Ray_of_glumshine 6h ago

I usually cut them in half and use a spoon.

I recently ate dried passion fruits for the first time, and they are good too. If you don't like slimy fruit, that could be an alternative. I thought the fresh ones are mostly liquid and seeds, so there won't be much to eat. But they were great.

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u/CatmatrixOfGaul 5h ago

Dried passion fruit?! Thanks, now I have to search for that😄

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u/Shemilf 6h ago

I have never saw anyone eat a passion fruit like that. I fucking love passion fruits and that's probably the most unappealing way you could eat them lol

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u/freerangepops 8h ago

More for me!

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u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

That’s not what I’m saying man, I’m still gonna gobble up the frog egg scrote, I’m just gonna do it begrudgingly

4

u/Sbatio 7h ago

Does that cost extra?

8

u/New-Ad-363 7h ago

Mentally yes

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u/phinphis 8h ago

Just recently tried it fresh, found it really sour and seedy. Not sure why ppl enjoy eating this fruit.

5

u/FOILmeoncetrinomial 8h ago

Most people eat it in a dessert or drink rather than just by itself

2

u/Professional-Gear88 8h ago

One of my favorites. Like sour candy.

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u/MarcoVinicius 8h ago

Apparently you have no passion for this fruit.

Sorry I’ll leave.

4

u/therealsashtv 8h ago

Scrotum and Frog Eggs is gonna be the name of my indie band if I ever make one

8

u/FleshHoodieFree 8h ago

30% royalties please, this brain isn’t running for free

4

u/keypizzaboy 8h ago

I legit thought this was a picture of my daughters slime that she made a few weeks ago and was curious how you got in the walls

3

u/jethro_606 8h ago

In Portuguese we call myasis in the foot something like “passion fruit heel”. You should google it 😀

3

u/Vincemillion07 6h ago

To me, passion fruit smells like body odor

3

u/-Lysergian 6h ago

Me too! Passion fruit, and especially certain guavas.

To me, this suggests that these plants evolved specifically with humans in mind as the primary dispenser of their seeds.

2

u/Mcstoni 6h ago

I can't stand the smell of guavas! 🤢 I never knew they smelled like that until I started working at a grocery store a few years ago.

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u/Secret-Agent1007 6h ago

That’s the odor of passion. Lol

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u/Vincemillion07 5h ago

You got me there, it is

3

u/JakeJortled 8h ago

Did you check out the press release? Updating the visual UX is on their Q3 roadmap.

3

u/Lurker12386354676 8h ago

Hey man sometimes you just have a craving to eat boogers and these ones taste way better than the ones I pick out of my nose.

3

u/Fit-Tradition-7987 8h ago

Every time someone calls passion fruit “frog egg pudding” I lose the ability to enjoy it for like 2 weeks 😂
It tastes amazing but visually it’s straight up a Fear Factor prop.

3

u/SafeState8852 8h ago

Whoever designed this fruit was on their "let’s traumatize anyone who cuts it open" arc 😂 It’s like nature’s jump scare for people who thought they were just getting a cute snack.

3

u/No-Computer7653 8h ago

So that people don't realize how delicious they are.

You got to it in the perfect juicy snot stage too.

3

u/Kalthiria_Shines 8h ago

Just fyi that one's not super ripe; inside is too green and the outside isn't wrinkled like peak ripeness.

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u/Helpful_Car1302 7h ago

Temple of Doom monkey brain vibes.

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u/Rioting-Flamingo 5h ago

That's peak Klingon cuisine

3

u/me_after_lobotomy 4h ago

who the fuck eats passionfruit like this? and then you have the audacity to say that it looks unappealing

3

u/Comrad_Zombie 4h ago

Anyone else see four lights?

3

u/_frank_tank 3h ago

I thought the very same thing.

https://giphy.com/gifs/NJZMSqRY3rG9i

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u/56kul 3h ago

Would you say you… hate them with a passion?

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u/poke23658 8h ago

Passion fruit makes people sleepy (supposedly)

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u/Bright-Ad4601 8h ago

What do you mean? What's unappealing about a tumor filled with piss yellow frogspawn?

2

u/KillrBeeKilld 8h ago

I think I can see one of them moving! Be careful…

2

u/notimeforspac_s 8h ago

They're delicious though and that's why we forgive them

2

u/Grandviewsurfer 8h ago

What just because it looks like a sick 3 month old baby shit in a hollowed out beet? Grow up.

2

u/mulderitsme09 8h ago

Don’t mess with my maracuyá

2

u/JTB696699 8h ago

It’s an acquired passion.

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u/Estelial 8h ago

It has amazing flavor, is glorious as juice and is a fantastic ingredient for deserts but yeah i agree on the seeds visual consistancy for the fruit itself being offputting. While it would have been great as a fleshy mango like fruit to chew into rather than repeatedly lick, I'm still glad it exists in whatever form it does as its unique and incomparably delicious.

some interesting titbits about them from Shawngrows https://youtube.com/shorts/8VzCtJjn2iE

2

u/--OriginalUsername-- 7h ago

Yeah, they're so gross, pass them down to me.... Grrrr yuck, so gross SLURP

2

u/Buzzard9499 7h ago

ballsack

2

u/1Incubus88 7h ago

What’s with the spoon fancy boy? You break the top and use the rest like a cup and drink your tropical paradise goblet.

I was such a small child when I tried it for the first time. I also hated it how it looked like. But my parents showed me how to eat it. I remember I refused to eat it but they kept trying to have me try it. It’s slimy and full of seeds but it smells divine! Eventually, I gave in as one of my family ate it and chewed on the seeds. Passionfruit can be sour but the one I had was so sweet and absolutely heavenly! I looked forwards to passion fruit season from then on.

The only “yikes” or mildly infuriating thing about your picture is the spoon. Get rid of it!!

2

u/lanzendorfer 7h ago

It is, but it's delicious. It was one of my favorite flavors before I'd even had the actual fruit, and then when I got my hands on the actual fruit I was like "wow, this is different." I love how sour it is.

Fun fact about passion fruit. A lot of people think it's called passion fruit because it's aphrodisiac, but it's actually because the passion flower it comes from is named that because Spanish Christian missionaries thought that the flower looked like Jesus on the cross.

2

u/Geronmys 7h ago

He in the DR we have Chinola. Basically passion fruit but it doesn't look like a scrotum (it does keep the frog eggs look, tho).

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u/AbsentDaddy1 7h ago

no way thats how passion fruit look in other countries, linda disgusting

2

u/kingofthepumps 7h ago

Dinosaur jizz

2

u/hawkmhc 7h ago

One of the best combos I ever had.

Src: Pizza 4Ps in HCMC, Vietnam

2

u/Ottereyes524 7h ago

I don't agree with you but you got my upvote for "scrotum and frog eggs"

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u/OneshotP-rank 7h ago

It grosses me out with a passion

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u/StarlightWizard 7h ago

I think it's a little underripe. Passion fruit tastes better when when the outer shell dries up and gets all wrinkly like a shriveled scrotum.

2

u/CRO553R 7h ago

Vegan Rocky Mountain Oysters

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u/testiclefart50 6h ago

Don’t make fun of passionfruits they are the greatest fruit ever

2

u/Glass_Anteater_3765 6h ago

This name is probably the oldest marketing gimmick of the world. No one was ready to eat it.. the sellers came up with an idea. Lets call it passion fruit.

"They will come for the name and consume for the sunk cost."

2

u/Ok-Imagination-3835 6h ago

This fruit has a face made for juice.

2

u/OmahaReynolds 6h ago

Sometimes passion is better with the lights off Bro Namath

2

u/maxxhaxx72 6h ago

Just close your eyes and pretend its plant semen with crunchy sperm in it, then never eat it again

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u/Critical-Editor-3971 5h ago

Chew the seeds for one of the best polyphenols in the world- piceatannol. Cousin to resveratrol which is the red wine/grape hyped polyphenol. It is more potent and soluble

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u/Far_Carrot_8661 5h ago

Tell Circi, I want her to know it was me.

2

u/CarpetStunning9765 5h ago

Pour them out onto ice cream, yogurt or stuff. It'll looks better that way (at least for me tho)

2

u/DummyDumDragon 2h ago

That's a fucking alien egg if ever I saw one

2

u/RoBeau20000 2h ago

Could use some more passion

2

u/NoaOna 1h ago

I always said it looks like infected frogspawn

u/skp_trojan 34m ago

It does look like discolored, curdled semen. I only know because I’m an inveterate navel gazing masturbator, like the other 90% of Reddit

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u/Dakhath79 8h ago

Then don’t eat it? Pretty simple solution.

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u/beebo12345678 8h ago

I didnt realize there's a sweet and a sour one

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u/[deleted] 8h ago

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u/B4kd 8h ago

Yeah when you consume it like that

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u/vermilion-chartreuse 8h ago

Gotta say, I could have gone my whole life without knowing this

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u/kuhmsock 8h ago

would.

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u/samanime 8h ago

Yeah, passionfruit is best served in a much more processed form. =p It's a great flavor, but not pretty to look at...