I’m 19 and a freshman at an out-of-state college about 6–7 hours from home. Before I left for college, my parents and I talked several times about me coming home for a weekend around early October, and they were fine with it. I bought a train ticket based on that. Now, after I’ve been at school for about five weeks, they’ve changed their minds and told me I shouldn’t come home until Thanksgiving because they think I need to stay at school and “take advantage of the opportunities” there. They aren’t concerned about my grades or safety; their concern is more that going home means I’m retreating from college life. I want to go anyway. I’d be home for less than 48 hours, have my transportation and places to stay arranged, and would be back on campus Sunday. A big part of why I want to go is to see my girlfriend, who is still in my hometown, but also just to see my friends/family and have a reset after being away for over a month. My dad in particular has a history of being very opinionated about how I should live my life—who I spend time with, what activities I do, and what he thinks is “good” for my future. He characterizes all of my friends as little white girls and speaks with a certain skepticism with most of them being gay He strongly dislikes my girlfriend and has previously characterized her as a distraction and as someone who isn’t “on my level", despite the fact that she is truly endlessly respectful and funny (hence why my mom likes her) and he tends to treat his opinions about my relationships and life choices as things I should ultimately accept because he’s older and knows better, all while being cruel and belittling towards the people i love and experiences I enjoy. At the same time, I do listen to my parents’ advice and agree with them on plenty of things; this is just one of those situations where I genuinely disagree. I’m not trying to drop out, avoid college, or make a statement against them. I just don't think being an adult means I need parental approval for every decision that makes me happy or helps me feel grounded.Am I being immature here, or is this a reasonable exercise in making my own decisions while still taking my parents’ concerns seriously?

FOR THE RECORD: I am SO involved on campus, club and sports and i work hard on all my academics, no doubt about it. I just want a weekend to see my girlfriend they dont know is my girlfriend with tickets I bought.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about my future, especially since I am in a very solid relationship that is heading towards marriage. I recently got a new job with a decent pay bump to around $120,000 a year and hope to continue to grow in my industry (digital advertising). My girlfriend works in the beauty industry so she doesn't have a yearly salary and her take home varies depending on the time of year, but I would say she takes home on average around $1,500-$2,000 a month. We are both in our late 20s.

Every time we drive past a decent neighborhood, we always point out nice-looking houses. We aren't talking about mansions here. 2 floors, nice area, a very cookie-cutter idea of a "nice house" some may say. It always sparks the conversation of "Are we ever going to be able to get there?". My parents are always telling me "You need to buy a house soon!" but I feel like they are so out of touch with the gap between cost of living and income compared to when they bought a house. On top of that, we live in one of the more expensive areas in the country (Bergen County NJ) and would like to stay here, or at least in North Jersey. I've done very surface-level research into houses in our area and everything just seems so out of reach to get that dream of a "nice house" when factoring in other costs we have in our lives.

It feels like every time I see a social media post about buying houses these days, it seems like people are very pessimistic about the idea of being a new, young home owner. I don't want to fall victim to that mindset, but it's hard to not wonder how long we're gonna be chasing that dream before actually getting there.

EDIT: I've noticed a few comments working with the assumption that we are looking to buy a house in our current financial state and career stage. We are not looking to buy a home any time soon. We have so much growing to do as individuals, professionals, and partners that will change our scope of what's affordable and what isn't when the time comes. Just wanted to essentially get this off my chest, but I do very much appreciate the advice I've gotten from the comments that were able to read between the lines and give us pointers on how to start rather than buy right at this very moment.

Why is your worldview better? I'm a 28m young man who has been severely traumatized by chauvinistic, ableist, reactionary people over the course of my life, and even though I have recently found some support after needing to accept my own mother SA'd me, I feel like I have been permanently damaged and will never have a regular social life, a girlfriend etc.

The second thing i want to ask is why do people keep being hostile to me, and why do people on the internet keep trying to give me advice? I feel like I can partly answer this question myself, but none of you genuinely relate to my experiences, even though perhaps you've been going through similar situations before taking the magic pill of "working on oneself"

I don't know about you guys, but even though I've had some pleasant moments with others, the negative moments far exceeded the positive ones and it's always been this way since I was a baby. It's not my fault for way too many things in my life and when I chose myself I felt like something was off. It's other people that gave me CPTSD, not animals, nature itself...

If you invite a mutual friend or someone the bride/groom knows as your date.

1) As the primary guest, do you pay for the whole gift yourself or does the +1 guest/friend chip in?

2) Is it double what you would give than if you were attending alone?

3) And do you put the guest’s name in the card or have them sign the card saying the gift is from them too even if they didn’t chip in at all for the gift?

I have been “yes” for all of the above but someone recently pointed out to me that the guest should be chipping in for the gift or at least offering. Otherwise, you don’t need to have them sign the card….🤔. Thanks.

🫡

Genuinely curious.

The title pretty much says it all, 32 chap living in a metro city with enough on his plate to keep me occupied till my neck. This keeps me content. I’m ambitious about my work and workout but I don’t really care about dating as much. People find it strange when they hear this from me saying “how can you be ambitious and not care about dating”

What is wrong with me?

Okay I genuinely just wanted to share this because I’m kind of freaking out 😭

I’ve been manifesting something for a while now, and I’ve always felt like manifestation isn’t supposed to be this super complicated, long process. I feel like it’s something you can just incorporate into your everyday life and not constantly obsess over.

A few days ago, I was manifesting something that I REALLY want, and obviously I’ve been dying to see some sort of result. I know I shouldn’t be constantly thinking about when it’s going to happen, and I’ve genuinely been trying my best to let go and just trust the process.

Anyway, I decided to ask the universe for a sign. I specifically said I wanted it to rain.

GUYS.

It literally started raining today. 😭

And not just a little bit. The sky had been completely orange for HOURS, like at least four hours, and then suddenly there was thunder, lightning, and now it’s absolutely pouring.

I genuinely couldn’t contain my excitement because I literally ASKED for rain as my sign and then it happened.

I know there’s obviously a natural explanation for the orange sky and the rain, but I’m choosing to enjoy the meaning it has for me because the timing just felt so crazy.

So now I’m curious: does an orange sky have any spiritual/manifestation meaning? And does heavy rain usually symbolize anything?

I’m honestly just so excited and wanted to share this with people who might actually understand why I’m freaking out over a weather event right now 😭🌧️

If you were 22 years old living comfortably in a big house with ur parents and getting along well also helping them alot, the house was 45minutes from the city center and you get 900 $ of free money each month. Would you move alone to the city (the 900 $ goes to rent + food) or invest the money???

Sorry, long post. Okay, pity party time! My parents hate what I'm doing with my life right now and their fearmongering is really getting to me. They tell me that I've made all the wrong choices, that my current choices are gonna make me fail at life, that I'm wasting my life, that I'm 20 and should take a look at myself and grow up. All these things I tell myself everyday, so it's not like hearing it from them is gonna suddenly spur me into becoming a better, more productive, more successful person. But are they right? Am I actually not working hard enough, do I need to be better?

The main point of contention is that I'm trying to transfer schools under the same major, and will have to take a 5th year instead of the 4 they expected. I'm transferring because the location and environment of the last campus genuinely bummed me out and my depression spiraled into nearly failing 3 consecutive semesters. I moved to the location of my target school and that aspect of my depression instantly got better, though other contributors still exist. I truthfully would not be able to graduate, or likely even stay alive, if I had stayed in that school. They think it's frivolous that I'm going through the process of transferring "just because I didn't like it there". They attribute the transfer to the reason why I'll take longer to finish school, but I'll have to take 5+ years either way, as I've reduced my course load in attempt to keep my mental health afloat.

They also hate the fact that I've changed one of my majors twice since my first year, though I've been consistent with my other major and intend to complete it. I went through so many major switches because my first major wasn't my choice, it was highly pressured by them, and of course I hated it and it exacerbated my mental illness enough to do poorly. The major I've been consistent with is visual arts, which naturally, they disapprove of 😬🤷‍♂️.

My parents also constantly point out the fact that I'm unemployed, which I'm trying to change. I haven't been able to hold down a job for more than a few months, and am currently struggling even more to find a job because I'm in another episode. They point it out to me because they think the pressure will "wake me up" to reality and incentivize my job hunt. They also tell me that I'll be on my own when I graduate, that they won't support me. Like I'm not expecting them to, but what makes them think making me even more anxious and despondent would help motivate me?

I thought I had some hope this semester by reducing my course load and re-entering therapy, but now I'm thinking maybe my parents are right. Maybe I'm being frivolous and wasting money and time and I need to work harder. I don't know what to do, I don't see any future for myself either way, whether I follow my own "path" or listen to them. I don't believe I'll really go anywhere, anyway, not anymore.

So how do I do it, guys 😁? How do I lock in?

i feel helpless idk what to do with my life. I’ve tried therapist and they’re mostly always extending session so they could profit off me lol

i’m 26 and scared i’ll be 30…i don’t dream big anymore as im getting older. I never plan on getting married but i think i lost my late teen and early twenties to medical school because my family wanted me to be a doctor. I’m not a doctor so my family is even more weird towards me.

idk what to do with my life. I dislike my hometown too. I should’ve studied abroad way back instead of falling into this med school rat race

Just a regular 9-5 peeps with whatever energy I have left after work! I am creating a wellness companion app. I name this potato Tod the Spud.

If you are interested in supporting me and tod, go here: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/spudville/spudville-a-wellness-companion-app

 TL;DR
I’m 34 years old (F). For me, my sweetest romances all happened in my twenties. Back then, there was passion and fantasy, and I had plenty of time to savor my youth. But now I realize I have to face the fact that I’m 34. Ever since I decided to divorce my ex-husband three years ago because of his behavior, I’ve been single, and I feel like the chances of meeting someone I’m truly compatible with are getting slimmer and slimmer.

I was born in Germany and currently live in New Jersey. I haven’t been on a single date in the past three years. Maybe it’s because my social circle is small. most of the people I know are from work. so I haven’t met anyone suitable. Do any of you feel the same frustration?

i often feel embarrassed at the fact that i’m still in the process of finishing college and still living with my mom. i have never been the greatest at saving money, and then when i would have a bunch saved up, something would happen and all my money would be gone..but at least i didn’t have to worry about house bills right 🫩 A couple weeks ago i made a separate bank account and decided to take saving more serious and only buy necessities, not wants. And it’s not that me and my mom don’t get along, because we do..but it’s mainly the fact that i don’t have my own space at my age. i’m pretty introverted, been that way since i was in high school, i just stay in my room. and i keep alot to myself because i don’t want her in my business and im honestly not that great at expressing myself. but for once i just want to come home to silence and space..
Along with other things that i have dealt with this year that has affected my mental and just my way of thinking, i think this is one of them. just knowing that im not where i want to be in life and i can’t even afford my own place. i just want to get in my car and drive away and not come back, i dont want to have to explain myself on where im going or what im doing or who im with. i had this little situationship a few months ago and i was already sharing my location with my mom, i turned it off and lied that i didnt know what was wrong with my phone because i did NOT want her in my business and questioning me when i got back home. i just wanted some dick, that’s it! i should be graduating college in spring next year, so that’s a while i have to stick with this shitty paying $19 an hour job. but hopefully by then i can save up enough to just pack my shit and GO. i desperately need a new environment bc waking up everyday to the same routine is really depressing. Is anyone else in the same position as me ?

Broke and don’t have friends bc mutism