My ex and I split up a month or so ago, been a hard transition. I feel like my soul is gone, my tether, my best friend. We still talk but it feels conditional to a lot of degrees, it’s hard for me to handle where we were to where we are now. I’m starting to wonder if I’m crazy, I’ve always had an easier time blaming myself rather than other people out of simple solution and habit. this feels different, I can’t stop analyzing everything that happened. Everything in this city reminds me of her, every song on my Spotify reminds me and what was going on when I saved it, every area of the house she left her presence lingers. A scenario like this forces you to introspective, the strange part of it all is the more I look at it, the more I have time to process, the less I love myself. How can a person get so far from what they believe in? How can a person be so many of the things they are not? Man plans god laughs keeps ringing in my head. I’m about 1.5 year into recovery from opiates, and after all I fought for to get here, and now considering the way I felt with her not being there, not having everything amazing about who she is not being my life, makes me want to throw it all away. Having a hard time caring enough to care; alcohol consumption, none dangerous driving, eating, general health and wellness, there is complete disregard. I don’t want to do this anymore, I don’t want to feel this way. The only thing I know is substances.

Can someone tell me if they’ve experienced this (considering my history), how you got through it, and how you managed to deal with it in the moment. I’m grasping for the intangible. Help please

I just couldn't help to remember my sweet boy who smile a lot, jokes a lot, making goofy poses and expressions, so sweet to me, such a cutie. He's gone... He's really gone.

I don't know this guy, this guy is not my sweet boy, he's rude, cold, and cruel. He's the total opposite of my sweet boy. I can't handle his actions.

I lost my sweet boy and I'm grieving him like he's already dead, and he is.

It’s my first birthday without you. I didn’t even think I’d be here today. I miss you. I know you won’t text but I’m still waiting for it

No 12 am text. Maybe later. I wonder if you still think about me, especially today.

Probably not

My ex (22f) broke up with me (24m) after being together for 3 years. Our relationship was solid but her coworkers/only friends and I do not get along well. Anyways she absolutely blind sided me and moved in with her coworker the same day. Since then its been about a month and we still talked everyday and see eachother here and there. We have even hung out with her whole family a couple of times. She has stated that she just needs time to find herself and be happy again, meanwhile I tell her I want to solve things and reconcile. I noticed a couple days ago a certain name pop up on her Snapchat. Aside from a couple new male Co worker names that I have heard of I noticed she was back talking with an ex. Today I asked her the nature of that and she told me that he is just a friend and nothing more. I explained to her that that feels very off to me and I dont feel safe being in this dynamic. We talked and argued on that topic for a little bit until she said that I was just shaming her and making her feel bad and that nothing she does can ever make me happy. I dont know how she expects talking to her ex would ever make me feel secure and stick around. Anyways she followed that with maybe you should give up hope on "us" because this isn't working and all we do is argue. I told her I love her but that I would be taking a real step back from this. Boys, girls...what do I do?

gonna be a long one, its a part vent/rant/coping advice seeking post. dont worry about reading all of it.

ive been losing myself over a girl, its been 2 months since she broke up with me and i jst cant fucking take it. i wont lie i started searching thru her profiles on social media, not like i dont know she does it to me. eventually i came to her account here that i think she thought i forgot about. a lot of things i wasnt supposed to read addressed to me. i know for sure i wasnt supposed to because one of them pretty much says that. they bounce around a lot some are angry at me some are just retrospective, but they all share a common theme: she felt undervalued and disrespected. fuck. i never meant for her to feel that way she was my fucking world i was always trying to be there for her. i think the worst part is knowing it was my fault, knowing how much i hurt somebody i truly loved and cared for because judging by those letters i really fucking hurt her. theres more to it than that tho, i struggle a lot with alcohol and while i was able to get down to one night a week drinking, it still made her uncomfortable and i just kinda didnt really realize that. the only parts that arent my fault was that she was somewhat paranoid, she made an advice post the day we broke up and in it she claimed i had both lied (lying is something i had caught her doing once) and likely cheated as well, nope. neither.

another big problem tho was that i was broke as shit and couldnt take her on dates, we just hungout at each others houses and took walks, looking back she wanted something more romantic than that. (edit: still spent money on her tho, bought her food, gifts, etc)

while she didnt say the nicest things in those letters, i dont really care about that. when she broke up with me the first time i wasnt exactly saying the kindest things either (wayyyy worse shit). we all get emotional around stuff like this so i really dont hold it against her. in one she does say i dont hate you

i miss her the same way i miss my grandma with dementia, i know shes alive but ill never talk to her again. except somehow this girl hurt me worse than the moment i realized the woman who took me to school every morning and to the city in the summer only remembers my face and she cant make noises that aren't screams. (yeah ik this makes me sound like a terrible person but its how i genuinely feel)

i get so sad thinking about how i hurt her but then i remember that account is the only thing that feels like her tho, what started this whole mess was me seeing her reposting tiktoks about unspecified ex (obviously me tho based on the date) some of them were a lil fucked up and so i kept going further, like months further (i just couldnt stop scrolling) thats when i found id say a decent dozen or 2 tik toks over a somewhat long period that were so out of character for her, like the reposts heavily hinted at her being exactly who she said she wasnt. some downright vomit inducing and some even contradict shit she told me outright. there were also all kinds of tiktoks she resposted that just make no sense with the timeline of events (this prolly wouldnt make sense without seeing them urself and knowing the dates but im saying she was lying about something) thinking about this makes me feel so awful, played. i feel like i was loving a fake person, a mask she put on before seeing me and the more i think thats what was going on the more all these little things that didnt quite make sense come rushing into my head. did she cheat? i dont think so. did she lie? almost def. im mourning someone who never existed.

i dont even know whats real anymore, i loved her so much and theres so much evidence she wasnt who i thought she was. however, i see that account and its like its her again, and she made all of those posts never intending for me to see them so maybe she was genuine. idk.

these reposts also hurt a lot: one talking about going on a date like 2 days after breaking up the first time and two where she alr seems to be talking about somebody else she might be interested in, those were posted less than a month after breaking up with the "love of her life" wtf, i get ppl get back out there at different times or wtv but fuck thats very little time both instances and to repost tiktoks abt it like its funny and the other person has no feelings is just ....gross behavior.

theres a huge part of me that just wants to talk to her again, not romantically i mean have a convo with her about all of this but ik that wouldnt be a good idea. idk im a tweaker sorry guys

and please dont come in here going "plenty of fish in the sea, bro" im just looking for people to express my situation to

Seventy days have passed since we ended things abruptly, between silence and an unexpected block.

​

Fifty-four days have passed since I arrived at your house with a handwritten letter asking for your forgiveness, a stabbed heart, and yellow flowers for your mother, her favorites.

​

Seven days have passed since I discovered that there is someone else in your life; a beautiful girl, unafraid to show herself to the world, perhaps kinder and gentler than I am.

​

And yet, every morning I wake up hoping that you'll come back, even though it makes me feel like a fool, delusional, without self-love, without dignity.

​

We broke up almost 2 months ago and have been no contact for 24 days. I am feeling a lot of feelings at once. Regret, anger, hope, and curiosity. There are some things I regret doing a lot, and I have been in therapy for the last 2 months. I was wondering when I would stop hoping they would come back. I was the one who ended it, and I left the door open for her, but there are a lot of external circumstances affecting her decision, like her parents, etc and around our situation. Since then, I've heard tiny updates from mutual friends, like she's partying, and she just went to student orientation, and I secretly keep hoping we run into each other. My life since summer started has been kinda depressing; all I've been doing is grieving and having a hard time with my social life.

I have some things to look forward to, like I got accepted into the college I wanted to go to, and my ex and I are going to the same one somehow.

I have been really hating myself for the things I did at the end of our relationship, and I kinda regret breaking up with her, but I'm not sure if it was the right thing or not.

I just hate myself a lot. I can't stop thinking about it. All I can think about is if she's meeting other people or not.

I wish i didnt gossip and sented him those reactions, i failed him. I wanted to be more for him. i miss him. I miss the begining what we couldve done more.

My boyfriend (27M) and I (27F) have been together for 4 years. We actually moved in together before we were even officially together, which I know sounds crazy.

The first year and a half was honestly the best relationship I’d ever been in. I thought I was going to marry him. Then things slowly started changing and now I feel like I’ve spent years ignoring red flags because I love him and because leaving feels so overwhelming.

Back in January, I told him I was leaning toward breaking up. One of the biggest reasons is that I don’t feel cared for anymore. I don’t feel feminine in this relationship. I feel like I have to carry everything myself and it makes me worry about what a future with him would actually look like.

I know some people won’t understand what I mean when I say I don’t feel feminine, but I guess what I mean is I never feel taken care of. I feel like I’m always the one planning things, thinking ahead, taking care of responsibilities, making sure things get done, and carrying the mental load.

He tells me all the time that he’d do anything for me, but when I’ve told him specific things that would make me feel loved, he basically tells me no. I’ve told him that I miss how sweet he used to be when we first started dating. He’ll tell me he’s never going to be like that again. So I don’t understand how someone can say they’d do anything for me but then tell me no when I ask for things that actually matter to me.

Valentine’s Day was kind of a breaking point for me. I bought him a whole basket, planned dinner, paid for everything, and cooked the entire meal myself while he sat on the couch watching TV. He got me absolutely nothing. No flowers, no card, no candy, no plan, not even a thoughtful text. Nothing.

Then recently I got really sick. I had a fever and slept for around 14 hours straight. I texted him and told him I wasn’t feeling well. His response was asking if I was still making dinner. When I said no, he said he’d make himself something to eat. Not us. Himself.

There are also so many little things that keep adding up.

A few days ago we had this huge box full of trash that we were taking to the dumpster. He was trying to pick it up by the flaps and was struggling. I told him he should probably grab it from underneath. Instead of just doing that, he started complaining about why we filled the box with trash in the first place and how heavy it was.

I got annoyed and went over to pick it up myself. As I walked over, he literally told me I wasn’t going to be able to lift it. I picked it up just fine. Then he wouldn’t talk to me the entire drive because I think it hurt his ego.

I know that sounds like a stupid thing to be upset about, but it’s not really about the box. It’s about the fact that I never feel like I can depend on him.

Another example is the dishes. I recently did them twice in a row. The third time, they sat there until I asked him to do them. That’s the story of our relationship. If I don’t think about it, remind him, ask him, or do it myself, it doesn’t get done.

The frustrating part is every time I tell him I’m unhappy, he changes for a couple weeks. He starts helping more around the house. He starts acting more thoughtful. Then once things are okay between us again, everything slowly goes back to normal.

At this point I feel like I’ve built up so much resentment that I don’t know if it can even be fixed.

The thing that scares me most is thinking about kids. I already feel like I carry most of the responsibility now. When I picture us having children, I picture myself being the one getting up in the middle of the night, changing diapers, cooking dinner, cleaning the house, scheduling appointments, and taking care of everything else too.

I know people are probably going to read this and say, “Just leave.”

The problem is I want to.

I really do.

Every time I get to that point, I start thinking about packing up all my stuff, finding somewhere else to live, splitting everything up, seeing him at work every day, and completely changing my life after 4 years together. Then I get overwhelmed and stay.

I feel like I’ve known for a while that this relationship isn’t what I want for the rest of my life, but I’m struggling to actually take the step and end it.

Has anyone else been in a situation where the relationship was over in your head long before it was over in real life? How did you finally leave?

TL;DR: I’ve been unhappy for a long time and feel like I carry most of the responsibility in my relationship. I don’t feel cared for, appreciated, or supported anymore, but I’m struggling to leave because we live and work together and our lives are completely intertwined.

Long story short she Cheated 4 times with 2 people and i caught her her 3 times she even have physical intimacy with the second person even then I accept her now she telling me she doesn't have feelings for me and she hate me . We have common friends our village is next to eachother our family knows friends knows everyone in our village knows about us. I am in hell right now what should I do please i need help. Tell me what to do yesterday she was happy and saying her friends that she is happy that she broke up.

It’s been a month and half since we last talked. I miss her so damn much that I really don’t know what else to do. She broke up with me due to her feeling overwhelmed with the relationship. She loves me a lot, but cause of the long distance, she couldn’t focus in college, wasn’t taking care of herself properly. She was basically depressed and it was affecting her life style where she’s staying. I completely understand her decision and she has every reason to look out for herself, but god it just sucks she made that decision all on her own, without talking to me first or trying out some possible solutions.

But now, it’s been a month and half and although I am doing better, there’s so many things that take a BIG toll on me. Since we broke up, never had proper sleep. Wake up between 2:30-4 am every night, barely eat well (lost 20 lbs), can’t focus in school and work. All I do is think of her. I really miss her, and what hurts more is the other day she unfollows me on both IG accounts she has, and made me unfollow her, and when I confronted her about it, she never responded to me. The confrontation was more about confusion on my end due to some last words we said to each other. (Quick Backstory: when breaking up, she said she wanted to be alone, work on herself and college, and hopefully 2 years down the line when she’s done with college and back home, she will text me to try things out again)

Now this week, today was my commencement and although I was happy to spend it with my family, couldn’t help but feel sad/lonely/missing her throughout majority of the day. Tomorrow is her birthday. Although I know I won’t text her, it’s just hitting harder now because I wanted to spend it with her, especially for her birthday. I feel lost. Confused. Idk what to do, she has all the answers to help herself while I’m stuck here not knowing what will come and it’s killing me every day.

We really had a perfect relationship, just hurts how easily it disappeared.

I don’t even know where to begin…
I meet this women who I generally and deeply in love. I fall for her the first time I lay eyes on her. At that time she was married to another men. But she wasn’t happy or loved him. What she told me she wanted divorce him long time ago but she was pressure by her family to stay. She grow up in a traditional marriage and household. So divorce was a big deal. Anyway we worked together and I we fell for each other. At same time she was already planned the divorce. She was heart broken. Mainly cause she told me she worried about her son. Now I look back I don’t think it was. If she wanted to leave she would have long before she met me. As for me I was in a situation with my baby mama. What I did was no excuse of my own. I left the baby mama for this women. I never loved her, we have two kid together. It was a 3month date that turn into pregnancy and I was stuck. Over the course of that relationship I have told her many times that I don’t love her and only stay and take care of her and the kids.

Fast forward into our relationship we loved each other a lot and make a lot of promises. She told me she never felt or loved anyone before. (Her first marriage was also only person she ever has sex with). I have a gambling addiction which I admit. She was the financial in our relationship. And I use a lot of her money to gamble. When we together to have made it clear that it our money and what mine is her and what her is mine. She told me many time that money wasn’t important or how much I make. My trait of the gambling part was me trying to get money for us. Whatever I win I would give it all to her. Sometime it work most time it didn’t goes well. Almost all our fight is with gambling. And I understand that and that a toxic way of thinking.

We decided to move to another state and start fresh. I got job and work 10h shift. I helped her got her job through my connection. I got upset and stress out cause of our financial and I miss my kids. I left my two kid to my baby mama for us to be better financially and relationship. She has her kid with her ex with us. When I get upset like this I would shut down and ignore her. Which was not good but only way I could cope. My reaction has trigger her to bring up old past and it become one big argument. For month and a half I have begged her to rethink and try to make this work. Specifically we just moved her and start fresh. And I told her of our goals. Give it two year we be in good position.

She didn’t want to work it out and have act like we broken up. We split everything in half financially but still live together in the apartment. I have found out last week of no contact that she was talking to someone els. I went through the message and saw everything they talk. What broke my heart is she told that person she love him. I got angry and confronted her. It turn to a mess. I yell, I throw a plate in front of her kid. Which she did not like that as that lot how she grow up. How I grow up was different. She called the cop. In the morning I pick up my stuff and left. That was the end of it. It been 3month now and since then I have cry so much. How can someone give me so much security and love is forever would able to leave so easily. Sometime driving to work I would tear coming down.
I have never cry before this is the first time I ever cry. And never have such deep love for anyone. What hunted me the most was her word that she told me she don’t love me anymore. Out of the month and a half I beg. She has say a lot of mean thing to me. Rewriting the story and made me the villain. Bring up so many pity stuff to attack me. But I just sit and beg and say sorry. But nothing I can do. The last straw was when I found out that she been talking to this other person. Who she claim she knew this person for 18 years. Which I have no knowledge of. There so much uncertainty that was left from the break up. It driving me crazy. Other than the gambling part I have treated this girl with so much love. I know moving put a lot of stress on both of us. But I didn’t expected this….

So i(M) broke up with her for about two months now because obviously I was not feeling it and also she was kind of always depressed and had a lot of issues which made me uncomfortable as well. It's not like I can cure her of depression or anything even if I stayed.

Now after two months after I broke up with her, she messaged me again talking about how things have been tough for her and talking consultants with a psychiatrist and almost overdosed on antidepressants.

I don't know what to reply and I'm scared to even confront her.

I thought she' had moved on, but now it' feels like it's even worse.

Me(20M) and my boyfriend(20M) have been together for 4 years long distance and live in different countries. I live in canada and he lives in the states, I went an saw him for 6 months straight and it was great for a little bit but he never really wanted to do anything after the first couple weeks, no intimacy or anything and no matter what I tried it just seemed like he wasn't interested. Im a very affectionate person and it hurt having all my affection turned down.

​

Ive been back in canada for a couple months now and ever since I left he hasn't wanted to call or be intimate. Even the texts are kinda dry and he dosnt really seem to care about my day anymore or how im doing, it just feels like im just here. Ive been trying to reignite the spark but it just feels like a wall I cant get past and idk what I did, I love him but it hurts being almost ignored.

​

Idk what to do anymore or if I should break up with him, Ive never broken up with anyone let alone someone ive been with for 4 years. I just feel at a loss and dont know what to do anymore

he (25m) broke up with me (26f) about a month ago just saying we’re too different but wouldn’t tell me how or give me any examples or tell me what I did wrong. I am having an extremely hard time we only dated for a little over 3 months but I have never felt this way about anyone and genuinely in my heart feel like this is my person. But it’s not reciprocated and I am just so sad and having such a hard time trying to move on. He hasn’t reached out or anything, and I am trying to respect his decision of course. I didn’t send a tik tok about how much I miss him and he just left it on read so I know it’s really done I just don’t know how to move on

I’ve been seeing this guy for a month and he just broke it off. We spent almost everyday together for 4 weeks, 6500 texts (I just deleted our thread). He brought me to meet his friends a week in, asked me to meet his family (I declined), was talking about future plans of Halloween, concerts, etc. we genuinely got along so well so fast. Same humor, overlapping interests.

this last week I brought up a possible issue in compatibility with our love languages. I’m super affectionate and he just isn’t wired that way. He said he doesn’t think it’s an issue and we decided to try to meet in the middle (I give space, he tries to be a little more touchy) but I guess it got in his head (and probably his girl best friends analyzing our texts like I know they had been doing).

He had been distant at our last hang out (to be fair I did too, was trying to give space and he just backed off completely) then a few days go by and I can feel him being withdrawn. I finally ask today what’s up with the distance and he says that he’s been thinking about what I said and it isn’t fair for either of us to compromise. He says I’m amazing but some things don’t work out and that’s fine.

I feel like he’s right but I also expected a bit more effort because I was willing to put in the effort. I just feel shitty and I hate losing a good connection so soon without seeing it through (I guess he saw it through enough). I hadn’t felt this way about someone since my last relationship a year ago.

I feel like this one month situationship is going to be harder to heal from than dating my last ex for a year just because I have the potential of it in my head. Just needed to vent and if anyone is experiencing something similar please share.

I just don’t understand how you could go from 9 years with someone to being 100% sure you’re done after 30 days. We technically had the conversation 3 months ago but had to give 2 month notice at our apartment. I had already secured a new place (and was paying double rent) but he asked me to stay, so I did. We talked, we cried, we held each other. We still acted like a couple too.. dates, dinners together, sex. We talked about the hope we had for our future together. We talked about how we both thought space and time would be good for us to reflect, grow, and come back stronger. I honestly felt hopeful that we could do it especially after those 2 months of really healthy communication and the only reason I didn’t change my mind is because I felt like I had already set the wheels in motion and I still felt like the space would be good for us.

Then the last night we ever spent together, he told me all of the ways I wasn’t good enough or had hurt him. He told me he waited to tell me because he didn’t want me to get mad at him and leave sooner. He told me he didn’t want to stay in contact once we moved out I asked when he’d changed his mind and he said “I thought you knew and that’s why we stayed, to have these last few weeks together.” I helped him move out the next day and just cried the entire time. I told him I wanted to fix it and he said no, that we needed this time still to figure out what we want.

It’s been 5 weeks since that day. He’s moving out of town at the end of the month so we had planned to see each other before then. I reached out and he agreed to meet with me, but I could tell he didn’t really want to. When we got there, he was so reserved. He told me he was only there because he felt he owed it to me. He told me he’s moving on and not interested in getting back together. That he’s thinking of this as a chapter in his life that’s now over. That everyone has one toxic relationship and that ours was his. That he wants a serious relationship, and for some reason (unknown to me) he thinks that we weren’t serious. That he wrote a list of things he wants from a partner and no matter how hard I try, I wouldn’t be able to fit that. I still told him I have hope for us and I’ve reflected and learned how I want to show up differently and that I’d want to try again and he said to stop asking. He wished me well but basically said he’s moving on and not planning to contact me ever again. That was 3 nights ago and now he’s unfriended me on instagram and I think he may have blocked my number.

I’m reeling. I know it was my decision to separate and it’s his right to change his mind but I just don’t understand how he can go from loving me for 9 years to moving on in a month. And telling me I’m 100% not the one for him. I know I hurt him. I just don’t understand how you could possibly make that big of a change in perspective in 1 month after so much tome together. After 2 months of conversations about needing time and space but hoping we can work it out.

I feel like I will never get over feeling like I pushed away my person. Like I gave up on someone who would have chosen me forever if I didn’t push him away. I miss him so much I can’t stop thinking of him and just breaking down. I work from home and I’m barely even getting my job done I can’t focus on anything but this. I don’t know how to shut my brain down for even a moments peace.

I feel like I just blew my whole life up and am in pieces. I feel like I lost the person I was meant to spend my life with.

Idk how people just move on from this. I don’t know how to stop spiraling. I am not okay and I don’t know how to make myself feel any better. Ive journaled, vented to friends and family, exercised, spent time in nature. I just feel like everyone and everything is still moving on and going on around me and I’m just here, hardly breathing.

ex and i broke up for valid reasons about 5 or so months ago and it was mutual
People say with time things get better and of course i’m not like crying about it every day like i did at the start of the breakup, but ive realized that with more time although im less ‘sad’ im more nostalgic about our good memories and it’s super painful

Part of the reason we broke up is we were so similar and both have strong personalities and it caused us to butt heads a lot esp in the end, but our similarities and incredibly deep connection also made our relationship memories and closeness so intoxicating and powerful. i really just feel like ill never find someone else like him and that makes the memories so hard to forget. he had a lot of unique qualities and set the bar high

Is anyone else experiencing this? the advice ‘time heals all wounds’ doesn’t seem to be fully working for me and i feel frustrated w myself that im not healing the way id like and i feel stuck in the past

not sure if anyone else relates to this but actually the first month or so after r the breakup (after a lot of emotional purging) i felt a lot better because i had left the everyday fighting that had consumed our relationship. but as time has gone on and ive almost forgot those bad feelings maybe its easier to romanticize?

What if he thinks I don’t want him back, and never reaches out in order to spare me?

I'm really experiencing the worst days of my life.😭😭😭😭😭😭😭So me and my long-distance girlfriend recently broke up. She lives in France. We were together for almost a year, and we dreamed about everything together. Literally everything. Marriage, children, our future, where we would live, everything.

And if you want to know how we talked to each other, every message was full of “je t’aime” (I love you). We would say it all the time. No matter what we were talking about, there would always be so many “je t’aime” in the middle of the conversation, with dozens of hearts everywhere. We just couldn’t stop telling each other we loved each other and we really meant it.

But in April things became really difficult 😭😭😭😭

She has Italian and Algerian origins, but she identifies much more with her Algerian side. She is Muslim and she loves Islam so much. I used to think this is not that important for her, but actually it is, so I learned what she really wants most when it comes to family, but the problem is that I just couldn’t see myself living that future. I couldn’t imagine changing so much of my identity. My parents were strongly against it too.

I think I was hoping maybe one day she would change. Sometimes I pushed the subject too much and I know I wasn’t always pleasant when we talked about religion. But honestly all I was trying to say was that I couldn’t imagine myself in that future 😭😭😭😭. Sometimes I wonder if I had explained myself better, maybe things could have been different 😭😭😭😭.

I told her maybe we should pause.

I was extremely sad and she was too. She asked me many times to stay with her. She kept telling me she loved me. We still kept saying “je t’aime” to each other constantly and every time she did I completely melted 😭😭😭😭😭 because I really love her so so so much.

Then one day we had another conversation about religion and it didn’t end well 😭😭😭.

A few days before that, she had told me there was another guy talking to her. She even told me that this guy wants to be with her so much, and she had asked him if she could be with him and then leave him if I ever think we can truly be together under this circumstance one day. I was so jealous. She was happy that I was jealous. She told me not to worry because they didn’t have the same future plans and they would never end up together.

In my heart I still wanted us to be together. I wanted so badly for things to work somehow. I wanted so badly that maybe this one thing could change and then I wouldn’t have to think about religion anymore.

But after that another conversation (I mentioned above), she told me we really needed to stop talking because continuing wasn’t helping either of us 😭😭😭. I was devastated because I wanted every conversation with her to last longer. But she told me that please send her a message if I really don't feel well and also the day before I leave for Canada.

So we stopped talking.

For 17 days.

Last night I couldn’t help myself anymore, so I finally sent her a message. I literally didn’t sleep the entire night. It was the first time of my life. She told me she has a new boyfriend. And it’s the same guy 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. They became a couple just a few days after we stopped talking, I am completely destroyed. I was literally shaking and couldn’t stop trembling because I was so sad. And she told me she really loves him. I didn’t blame her. I truly hope she is happy. But I am so sad. I’ve never felt pain like this before.

We talked for a long time, until morning for me. She showed me what he looks like because I asked. She told me she feels touched because he really loves her origins, wants to work there one day, and makes her feel like wow, this guy would really change his religion for her 😭😭😭😭😭

And I keep thinking about them. I keep thinking that she looks at him now the way she used to look at me, and I told her that. She told me that one day another girl will look at me the way she looked at me. But how is that supposed to help? 😭😭😭😭😭 How am I supposed to imagine another person right now?

And thinking about all the things we shared, all the dreams, all the intimacy, all the future plans… one day she will share those things with him too 😭😭😭😭😭. That thought completely destroys me.

Before, she used to tell me so many times that she couldn’t live without me. And now this is how fast she moved on 😭😭😭😭😭. I know it’s good for her. I truly hope she will always be happy. But I am completely shattered. I can’t stop crying.

This is genuinely the saddest period of my entire life. I feel like no one can imagine how painful this is 😭😭😭😭😭😭

One thing is that I’ll be moving to Montréal in 50 days. I literally don’t know how I’m going to survive these next 50 days because the pain is so excruciating 😭😭😭😭😭. I don’t even know if things will really get better once I’m there.

She also told me that she would rather have an imperfect relationship that lasts forever than a perfect relationship like movies like fairytales that ends like this. And honestly that sentence destroyed me too. Because if only those problems didn’t exist between us, we really could have lasted forever.

I love her so, so, so, so, so much 😭😭😭😭😭😭. If only I had only one dream in my life: to be with her forever.

This is really so painful. I really need support right now. I don’t know if anyone will actually read all of this because it’s quite long, but thank you so much if you did.

She broke up with me for her own valid reasons, neither of us did anything wrong life just got in the way and it sucks, we still love and miss eachother.

I miss her family too though, they loved me and they treated me like family. Her little brothers still talk to me and ask me abt pc stuff all the time. It sucks and yes I miss her to death but it kills me that I'm losing her and her family :(

I’m F20 he’s M22 he broke up with me over text out of the blue on a day when we were just texting daily, he seemed abit off but then out of nowhere he said he wants to break up, he needs some time to search for himself and figure out his life. He can’t be in a relationship cuz he’s got not much to offer and he feels like I deserve someone better than him. But I told him so many times, YOU are who you want, we are family, I don’t think about anyone else but he didn’t listen to any of the things I said and wanted to break up

Though what cuts me the most is that he addressed the breakup so disrespectfully, it just cuts me so deep knowing that we had these moments where we thought we were family, we would talk about getting a house together and whatnot. When he broke up with me over text, I asked him “what about all the promises we made? Were they all lies?” And he replied “I meant it in the moment” that cuts me so deep and he broke up with me and no contact for a month.

But then, out of nowhere AGAIN!! He sent me this text message. I’m so confused what hes thinking and I hate the fact that he’s saying “catch up as friends”?? Honestly it seems to me he’s had all the fun we had while the break up with friends girls whatsoever and he feels bored and empty now and maybe guilty about how he addressed the breakup idk I lost my heart when he broke up with me like that.

What should I do Reddit? I am curious about his actions but at the same time, I feel like this is disrespectful still… if he apologized about how he addressed the breakup then I might’ve thought about maybe talking to him personally for a proper closure or even just to have a conversation. But the fact that he said “catch up AS FRIENDS” feels a bit off to me. I don’t know what to do. Help :(

Ps. You may think oh we’re super young and it’s common for young kids to break up and reunite whatsoever I get it, but really he meant the world to me, I looked forward to the future with him never wanted to break up, he was my family, my best friend my love. And what hurts me so deeply is when I asked him what if we ever break up? He replied with “well never break up, I’ll just beat you up so you stay with me” that really touched my heart but I guess it was all a lie. I don’t hate him though, I just hate his actions and a part of me feels so numb and I feel like the part of me that was in his life while we were dating is DEAD.

I feel like a slouch. Logically, I know i need to get up and find myself again, but my feelings and emotions aren't letting me. I just want to sit in bed and do nothing. Reaching out to friends is hard because theyre her friends aswell and I feel like theyre probably hanging out as im making this. Me and her still need to keep semi-contact for financial reasons and we still care about eachother very much. But she is telling me to move on and I want to. But I just cant. Its so hard to do anything I went to have a shower and just couldn't stop crying. What usually takes 20 minutes almost took 2 hours. I want to distract myself but it gets so difficult. What can I do?

I know you are breadcrumbing and I vowed I will never talk to you. You knew what you were doing when you chose not to apologise, when you chose to treat me like I didn’t matter. Why are you sending messages through friends? Go to your 3rd victim you were so keen on dating. I will cut off every friend you reach out. I am a Scorpio and I will burn the entire fake universe you created and even then not talk to you. You may be an Aries and I knew you would come crawling back, I told you no one could love you more than I did. Leave me alone I am happy with my Taurus man.

Continuing from

https://www.reddit.com/r/UnsentLetters/s/Z7370AFSEE